Indigo1991

2x4no more, lots of good advice so I will chip in with a thought - is it time to stop setting urself up to fail? I did it and, to some extent, we all do it by giving ourselves arbitrary targets, even if they only exist in our heads. Then if we don't hit them - we have failed. No we haven't, we just didn't match our expectation.... Huge difference. For me, I now look at every pound lost as one I won't see again - ever. I have no expectations of myself other than if I follow the protein/water/exercise instructions I will lose either weight or inches. And both matter, one isn't more important than the other. Being sleeved is different from anything u have done in the past because your body - most of time, lol - is on ur side and will join in. Yes there are stalls, I have had one for the last month but have gone down a whole size in clothes. And I know that will eventually appear on my scale. But I also know not to stress any more and that also helps my body take care of its business. It isnt easy but you have done a great thing for you and your body in getting sleeved - go with it, it gets better!!!! Good luck :-)

As Lia M says, ask your doc. Everyone's different, mine says no alcohol for a year then only in limited quantities thereafter. From what I have heard from other sleevers, one drink can get you wasted with our tiny stomachs! My sympathies are with you as a former champagne drinker myself - but i know the fizz would be agony in my new tummy (think about it feels with a bit of trapped air when you are drinking/eating) so even if I was allowed to drink, I wouldn't have any of that :-((( Happy 21st when it comes x

Me too BethinPA! Have just had a couple of dates with a nice guy with the Buddha belly and have been wondering if that's me making a backwards choice because he's within my comfort zone... or rather he's in my old comfort zone. Have now been invited out for lunch (!) with another guy, who's whatever the male equivalent of a gym bunny is - and he races motorbikes. So he's toned and athletic and fit! But although I look pretty reasonable, my friend describes me as "she looks like a yogurt but she wobbles like a jelly". Think you all get the picture :-)))) Still have a bit of toning to do!!! Good thread, has made me think of what lies behind my decisions to have dates with both guys. Mmmmm.....

Ps you sound like you have a good support system in your family - use them, once I started letting people help, life got easier. And great news re going to school....

Wow such a lot on your plate and still you made a good choice! Sending you a big pat on the back for that - and a hug for the rest of your problems. Next week, life will change - I believe it will get better for you including the emotional eating. I separated from my husband after 30 years three years ago and although I was an emotional eater before that, I got way worse after. When I was sleeved 4 months ago I felt at rock bottom, although I hadn't shared that with anyone. I kept eating until it dawned on me there was nothing in the world that I ate that made me feel better, about me or my life. Nothing tasted so good that it made me feel better... Since I have been sleeved, I have had a new lease of life. My confidence is back, I am healthy and well and, according to others, I am looking amazing :-)))) What I haven't done in a long time is eat unthinkingly or because of how I feel. Yes, I still have pressures and worries but nothing I can't deal with, whereas in the past, I would have headed for the fridge. I feel I now really have something to lose if I make bad food choices - and if you had said that to me four months ago, I wouldn't have believed you. So well done, hang in there and the very best of luck with the surgery - let us know how you're doing....

Ps as I have lost weight, I am now comfortable doing different types of social activity - my friends and I are going dancing in two weeks. That was something I never thought I would ever do again. So life doesn't need to revolve round food!

We are all with you, as cindymg says we wouldn't be here if we weren't all coming from the same place as you :-) It's hard to believe now but surgery will change your life in so many ways that you can't even foresee just now. It seems scary but it will be all good! My social life used to revolve round food. I still join in with all of that four months out. But now my focus isn't on the food itself, it's on enjoying the time with friends and family. And they all get what I have done and why. Took a bit of time, but they accept what is now my new "normal" in terms of what I eat and how much. They are so happy for me, having watched me be so miserable over the years, and I am sure your family will feel the same. At the moment, I know it's hard to be positive or to see just how life changing this surgery will be. It is a huge step to take, it won't always be easy as you will see from posts on this site. But it put me on the road to being healthy and fit - and I have never been happier despite my initial fears and concerns. As for failing, if you do what you are meant to do in relation to Water and Protein, your sleeve pays you back by doing what it's there to do - help you lose weight. It's all pretty simple Keep asking questions and stay strong. This decision is about you, no-one else walks in your shoes. So whatever you choose to do, do it for you, what the rest of the world thinks really doesn't matter, this your life....

Four months out and i can say with certainty I prefer savoury flavours to sweet, huge change. My biggest disappointment is that I struggle with the taste and texture of bananas - previously my favourite fruit :-( Upside is anything remotely sweet and one taste is enough... like Cheri I can taste artificial sweeteners in one tiny bite so I avoid at all costs. Probably better for me anyway. Like Kathp, I think carefully before I put something in my mouth and consider if I really want it and whether it is worth eating. Funny place to be as it's not really a conscious practice but as I fill up pretty quickly, I want to make my food count rather than eat some cr*p and regret it until my next meal...

My son had knee surgery last week so is staying with me (for another 8 weeks!!!) until he recovers enough to look after himself again. Tonight, his dad, my ex, came to see him for dinner. I did the whole steak, potatoes, veg, followed by apple pie and a cream custard. Not only didn't I eat a mouthful of what they were having, I didn't eat anything - because I didn't feel ready to eat. No-one commented, we all sat together and chatted, then both said thanks for a great dinner. Two hours later, I am having something to eat as i now want to and I will enjoy it. That's a huge change in my mindset and I hope it's the beginning of the end of food ruling me rather than the other way around. Globetrotter, I get the whole permission not to eat thing too. Choosing when to eat (or not) and not being dictated to by food (or people) is such a freeing experience. Long may this continue :-)

Sorry to tell everyone but the hair loss is a side effect of the surgery, your body's response to major surgery. So shampoos, Protein, vits improve the quality of ur hair and help with re growth but nothing stops the hair loss. If there was a way to avoid it, we would all be given the cure! And there would be a lot less guys with shaved heads :-)))) Am currently losing mine but as I said in another post, once it stops and re grows, I will still be healthy and looking great - it's a small price to pay for such a huge change in my life.

Thinking of you and wishing for a speedy recovery - you are in the best place! x

Looking good, glad u persevered!

Yup me too, in to the office, looked at my scars, weighed me, asked if all was well, then out the door - painless! As for the inches rather than scale movement, I am always in awe of how the sleeve works. I have been stalled for 4 weeks in terms of my weight. Although I am being patient, I have upped my Protein and fluids to give my body a bit of a kick. scales haven't moved but yesterday I tried on a top I bought a month ago that was too small when I bought it but I loved it (I looked as if I had been stuffed in it, lol) and knew I would fit it eventually. Well "eventually" came yesterday - the scales read the same but I have gone down almost a whole size in the last month and I look great in the top, with room to spare!!!! So inches or llbs, it's all working for me - hope it keeps working for you, the scales will move but inches matter just as much :-))))

Omg, 2 years, will be too old to care by then lol!!! I wanted to leave it a year post surgery but I am beginning to look like Jessica Rabbit the smaller I get )))

I am so with you on this. Whilst as adults we are free to make our own choices, there are deeply ingrained behaviours and patterms that are incredibly difficult just to set aside and forget about them. But you understand what the problem is and knowing that is the start of changing things for the better. Out of everything you say, the most significant phrase is "I struggle to believe that my desires matter" ... and therein lies the root of your inability to do nice things for yourself without feeling the need to justify them against being wasteful. You matter. So what matters to you is important. Your logic tells you that it is a better deal to buy a new lipgloss than eat fast food. But your internal voice still tuts and tells you off for wasting money. So time to give yourself permission to live as your adult self, free to make decisions in your best interests, because your happiness and wellbeing are in your hands - and because you matter. Who sees that you took a sip of Coke and poured the rest away? Only you... so time to tell your internal critic to take a seat in the corner while you enjoy life's small pleasures, cos that's what they are. And we all need them. Every time you do something that should make you feel good, stop and allow it to feel good, don't put the other side of the argument - just enjoy. As you know, new habits take time to develop and so you need to praise yourself without thinking "ego" or "*******". Those are other people's opinions that you've absorbed over the years - tlme to let them go. I come from a background where I can relate to everything you say. In recent years, I have walked a tough path to let go all the associated behaviours as I knew I couldn't move forward with anything until I did. To begin, with I didn't think I could at 51 years old. But I have, taking small steps, culminating in paying $15,000 for my sleeve never having spent anything on myself in years because I didn't think I mattered... Good luck, you look fab and you deserve to be toxin free. The rest of us are right behind you :-))))

You usually get a diet to follow to shrink your liver, some docs go for liquids only, mine did low carb, high Protein, restricted calories. You need to ask the nutritionist what diet he or she wants you to follow, it's not up to you to decided, lol - but as Arts137 says, odd too that you don't have a date for surgery but they are asking you to shrink your liver... Good luck, with the right diet, you will lose weight pre-surgery :-)

Surgery plays havoc with ur hormones post op, hence the effect on periods. It settles and things go back to normal. But it can be a bummer coping with that and everything else all in the week after surgery, lol'

Whilst I am looking fairly proportionate in my clothes, the problem I had pre weight loss remains - my boobs are way too big for the rest of me. (Including pre surgery, have lost 58lbs, 20-ish to go.) They were 40g, now a 34 hh. Good bra makes them look ok in clothes but undressed they look ridiculous in the context of my shrinking frame :-( Went yesterday to buy a dress for an upcoming posh dinner and was so disappointed that despite my new size, I still can't get a dress that fits top and bottom :-( So, to you girls who have had breast reduction, when did you get yours done post surgery? And did you get the timing right? Thanks...

Sounds as if you feel you should be there but know, in practical terms, that you can't... You just did something major and positive for yourself, now give yourself time to heal, recover and get used to the new life. We can hear your distress at the thought of missing this event but, as you say, you went to his first wedding. Cut yourself some slack, your hormones will be all over the place which will also be making you feel emotional. Decide today what you are doing then stick with your decision or it's going to be another week when your focus is elsewhere rather on you. And at the moment, you need to concentrate on you. Final thought - we would all like to believe that if we don't go to something, we will be missed. That's true up to a point, but if you don't go, everyone else will still go and have a good time, your absence will be noted - but that will be it. Limited impact. Meanwhile you will be safely at home doing what you need to do, looking forward to seeing the pics of the day... Think you know what my advice is :-)))) Just make the decision then relax, stress isn't good for weight loss

Trudyjo, go online and search for hair fibers or keratin fibers. These are tiny fibers in a powder that u apply to thinning hair (attaches to individual strands to bulk them up) and it fills in the gaps. Won't come out in wind or rain, just when u shampoo. Does work, hopefully will be just what u need to get u through :-)

I had my moments early on when I was grateful that someone shared their positive attitude. Am doing what I can to repay that... Thanks for all the comments, glad I spoke up :-)

Yup, fibers seem to do the job. Google them and there are a number of companies that offer this as a treatment for hair thinning/loss. It's keratin fibers (which is what hair is made of), they are in a powder (like a dry shampoo), puff them on the thinning bits and they stick to individual hair shafts to bulk them up. It creates the impression of more hair and they don't blow away in wind or rain - they need to be shampooed out. From reading others posts, including Mykeld 2 on this thread, a good haircut can also help... fh61, we are in the same boat, my 22 year old had knee cap stabilisation surgery four days ago and I wish it was me not him going through it... He looked after me so well after my surgery, I am doing the same for him now. He was in such pain this morning that when I was showering and watching my hair disappear, it really didn't seem as important... Jen 35, the fact that you are trying not to fret about things you can't change is a great start. When I was young, i worried about everything, as I have got older, I am more selective about what gets my time and energy - and there's not much... lol!!!

Most people, if they are going to experience hair loss, see it start around 3 -4 months out. But some people don't lose hair, some lose it later, some lose it earlier and the amounts vary hugely. Like most things in life, it's your reaction to a situation that dictates whether it goes well or badly... If my hair's going to fall out, it's going to fall out no matter how I feel about it. I am a great believer in not wasting energy on the things I can't change - am keeping it for my new dating life, lol!!!!

From seeing what others say, it varies. For some it's a few weeks, for others it can be months - and in a few cases, quite a while. Some lose very little hair, others lose a lot. But you seem like you're on top of it irrespective of what happens :-) Stressing doesn't help, which is why I am staying pragmatic. Life has changed sooo much for the better, this is just another bump in the road to where I am meant to be be x

Think you need to take what your friend says re genetics with a pinch of salt. He may be right but there are those who say we can cross any genetic barriers with the right training - it's the training that stops the progress that you might achieve if it's not right for your body. There's a lot of noise out there because there isn't a definitive answer to the basic question as to whether we are genetically predisposed to only a certain amount of muscle growth or not - and no way to prove what our pre-programme is. For what it is worth, I wouldn't touch hgh with a barge pole. Look more into ways of innovative training and just make sure you aren't in a rut with your programme. It's very easy for your muscles to get into the routine and give up cos they know what they are doing - regularly shock and awe them into submission! Weightlifting, even heavy weights, doesn't mean you are strong, it just means you have developed the muscle need to lift big weights - and being strong is the best basis for building muscle and definition. As a woman, I am usually found working out next to guys who are shocked to see a wee thing like me working with the same weights as them... and I bet I could beat them at arm wrestling Good luck, persevere but no hgh yet....