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It seems hard to believe, but after all of this time, we are underway. I started my liquid diet yesterday and so far, it's not bad. Tomorrow, I have a pre-op class, and then they'll be doing my scope, so they can take a peak down my esophagus and into my stomach to make sure there aren't any surprises. Then next week I have my pre-op physical, and then just days after that, it's go time!
 
While all of this is extremely exciting, it's happening at a crazy time of year. With my surgery on the 11th, I feel strongly that I should have my shopping done before I go in, so that Christmas is taken care of. I'm trying to get all of the wrapping and everything done. As a teacher, this is a crazy time, too. This point in the semester is very busy at the high school where I teach, and the night class I teach at the local community college is coming to an end as well. I also sponsor a student community service group, and they have all of their usual December activities. (This is their busiest time of the year.) Anyway, we're all busy, and I just feel like I'm on a roller coaster right now, barreling toward the surgery and everything else coming up.
 
There's not much point to this post other than me expressing the need to pull my hair out right now. But I'm trying to stay focused on my health and getting myself prepared for what's coming. I need to start exercising again, but finding the time is getting trickier and trickier. But if I'm doing this, I know I need to exercise.
 
Anyway, that's where I am today.

Is it me or have my senses changed? Before surgery, drinking protein shakes was a breeze for me. I always had the Carnation instant strawberry breakfast. When I got out of surgery, I had alot of nusea and probably vomitted 3 times while I was admitted. But during my hospital stay and when I went home, I noticed that my smell to things was super sensitive. My taste was even more sensitive. I tried a protein shake and nearly threw it up. I could not stand to smell it as I brought it up to my mouth and I surely couldnt tolerate drinking it. Even the none caloric powder you add to water changed in taste for me. I noticed that these two particular senses has changed drastically. I feel at times that it's all in my head. Has anyone experienced this?
 
What I am trying to work on is my water in take. 64 ounces a day is really hard. I was never a water drinker, the liquid diet before surgery sure was a challenge but now just three months after surgery (august 6th was surgery), I am still experiencing difficulty with water intake. My follow-up with my dietician is always the hardest for me because I feel guilty that Im not succeeding in the water category. I even went as far as to trying to infuse my water with lime, cucumber and mint leaves but just as the none caloric powders, I just cant seem to drink water. Im lucky if I drink 20 ounces in a day.
 
I try to have watermelon every morning. I have an egg with a cup of coffee each morning. My food intake ranges from a 1/2 cup to a cup of food before I am feeling completely full. I have experienced a sensation of "over full" and have felt the need to purge in order to get relief. This only happens sometimes, depending on what the food may be. I also have experienced one episode of "dumping". I was making pancakes for my daughters, I had a sliver of a pancake and I suppose the syrup and butter was way too much. I was throwing up and had diarrhea for a day and a half. It was the worse feeling and I dont wish it on my worse enemy! I was laid out and out of comission, it was a crazy feeling and experience! What I have also noticed is that I can't tolerate bread, rice, or pasta. All my favorite foods basically lol. What I do love is the Oikos yogurt in plain vanilla. Its a sin to eat this yogurt which is good for you and actually tastes good! This yogurt actually saves me from my super strong sweet tooth I get in the evening! I'll also have about 7 pretzel sticks with a laughing cow triangle to munch on. That's something Im proud to say that I do now, I read lables on food products and can say I somewhat understand them. My nutrionist keeps me at 64g of protein and 20g of sugar. So everything that I pick up I am looking at these two set goals for me. I was shocked to see how many things that I love so much were so bad for me! Before my surgery, I had to keep a food diary. Everything I put in my mouth I had to jott down as well as the way I was feeling at that very moment. I found out that I was a "carb-aholic" and an emotional eater. Dont get me wrong, I get stressed and look around for some "comfort food" and when I find it, I tell my self "you dont need it and it defeats the purpose of your surgery" and I walk away. Im not gonna lie and say everything is "perfect" after my surgery. I cry because I miss food, I cry because I get completely full after a couple of bites, I cry because certain foods just dont agree with me anymore and I cry because my weight is not pouring off me. Anyone experiencing these crazy emotions and are willing to admit it?
 
On a brighter note, I do feel more confident, I like that my neck has some sort of definition of actually looking like a neck versus just a head on a pair of shoulders. My clothes are baggy on me and I do get compliments on how I look. It will only get better from here on! My inner-self has to catch up with my outter-self. My inner-self is still a chubby chick scared to meet the soon-to-be-skinny-chic. I'll try to let you know of my speed-bumps on this weight loss journey.

I've been thinking about what I'll wear under my clothes after the surgery.  Right now I fluctuate between Body Magic (horrible when you have to go to the bathroom) and Squeem.  I tend to run cold so I'm always layering and if I can find something to nip and tuck, I'm game.  I've tried Spanx but they either don't stay in place or are so thin they are not worth it.
 
So as I read the many posts here about compression garments, I've wondered if anyone knows of any scientific studies that show they help.  I ask this because I didn't wear anything right after my c-section but once I finally started it was a whole new world...far less pain.  I always wondered if it was all in my head or if it really helped me in some way.
 
Now, in speaking with my surgeon, he didn't have a preference.  I'd like to go ahead and buy now (if it is worth it) during the holidays since there are a few promotions going on.  But I'd like to know if it was worth it for any Sleevers that may have tried them post-op. 
 
Specifically,
Did you find it helpful? If so, why...if not, why not? What brand(s) did you buy? What model/item? How soon after surgery did you wear yours? Was it painful to get into? Do you still wear it? Anything else that I should know to help me decide? I'd really appreciate anything anyone has to offer regarding this.  Thanks!

Insurance approval was faxed to my surgeon today! I'm approved! We'll be setting a surgery date within the coming days! I'm SOOOOOO excited!

Hey everyone...
 
On November 16th it's my last dietitian visit.
Last week I went to the heart doctor.. he said everything looks great.
Today I went to the lung doctor he told me my lungs are perfect but he wants me to do this machine over night (at home) to monitor how I sleep. GREAT
 
I gained about over 20 pounds since I started this journey and feel really down about it.
I should be getting surgery Dec/Jan. & I'm VERY excited!
 
Talk to meeee
I want to hear your stories.

2 more dietitian appointments ( October & November )
 
My insurance has no other choice but to approve it because I have a case worker there & she says I NEED the surgery!
 
I plan on getting the surgery sometime in December... because I'll be on winter break. ( I'm in college )
I'm SO excitedddd
 
Talk to me ; tell me your stories ; I need support!! let's be friendssss!

Hello everyone!
 
I'm back on here!!!!!
 
I ran into a lot of trouble =/ .... As you know I started my whole program in Jan. 2012 then my third Dietitian appointment was in May ... A day before my 4th appointment the dietitian calls telling me my insurance is not going to pay her anymore!!! =O I was SOOO upset! So I called and went crazy on them letting them know they TOLD me It would ALL be covered!!!! I ended up getting a case worker and she set me up with a dietitian they pay for FINALLY!!!! I had my 4th dietitian appointment today!!!
 
I'm SO excited for surgery & should be having it .... maybe November? December?
 
QUESTION!!! : After you send your paperwork into the insurance company... how long will it take them to approve it????
 
I'd like to hear other peoples storiesss. Talk to meeee =]
I need more supporters!!

OMG! Let me tell you what transpired yesterday! So I received a call from my surgeon's nurse at home last night. She was calling me to inform me that my surgeon wanted to know if I would be interested in being interviewed along with other patients about our weight loss journey/story. She didn't have alot of details but basically said I would sit and be asked questions about my experience with the bariatric team. The staff would also be interviewed and THEN it would be shown all around the hospital campus. HOLY ****! I was getting nervous just thinking about it as she kept talking. Finally when she finished, I told her I would let her know by Thursday if I'd be interested. The interview is to take place and recorded on Tuesday, December 4th.
 
I'm a pretty much super shy individual :ph34r: . Lets not forget a very shy chubby individual. The thoughts of having people see me throughout the hospital system gave me some anxiety. I would be the girl walking down the hallway and people will stare, point, and maybe even laugh. I guess my chubby girl syndrome still lingers deep back in my head telling me these things could happen and truly probably wouldn't even happen. I asked three of my closest friends their thoughts on it and they all said "DO IT". Their reason's were pretty much all the same "to inspire" someone else to "go for it".
 
Never did I intend to be considered as an "inspiration". I'm still trying to find myself, get used to that fact that I will indeed be a transitioned slimmer individual and perhaps not as SHY as I am. Lets not forget that I weighed 225 before surgery and I currently weigh 176. It's not much of a weight loss, at least not in my eyes. So Im still kinda questioning "why me". I'm quite comfortable being "baby who is left in the corner" .
 
SO, today, I knew I would run into my surgeon (I work in the same hospital as he does and better yet, I work on the same floor his main office is located in, not the clinic but his main office). I tried drastically to avoid running into him this morning because I knew he had probably touched base with his nurse and she would tell him I'd give an answer this Thursday. :ph34r: My morning was going pretty good, I avoided running into him and about 9:00 wouldn't you know that he asks around the department my whereabouts and corners me in the copy room. He such a good guy! He plainly asks me if I would do the interview and just represent his office in general. OMG! How could I say "no"? I did tell him I'd let him know at the end of the day BUT I have decided and I am gonna do it. I'm not sure how much I can help another individual but what I do know and I gave it alot of thought last night and today, MY surgery is like a tattoo, people get a tattoo for symbolism. They get a tattoo to make a statement and a tattoo is meant to be seen and not hidden. My surgery is my tattoo, its obvious that my body and appearance is changing. I'm going to get looks by everyone and I should be proud that I'm doing something good for me, something that makes me proud to have done, proud to be looked at other than as the chubby girl with a pretty smile. I'm truly honored that I was one of the patients he chose to be interviewed and displayed. Maybe GOD picked me so I can be comfortable with who I am rather than who I'm used to being. Its time to come out of my cocoon and let my wings be seen.
 
I'll keep you posted on the whole interview/recording journey. Wish me luck, IM GONNA NEED IT! YIKES!!!

So i am 2 weeks post op and i was wondering if is it me or does anybody else have problems drinking the 64 oz of water a day?
Every time i try to drink water i get nauseous !! Does anybody else has experienced this too??
HELP!

Today is post op day 18 and I am over it! I really have not attempted to eat anything today because my relationship with food is now so complicated. Before you put one single pice of food in your mouth you must go through a series of questions. On top of everything else you need to remember to take your vitimains and manage to get 64ozs of fluids down. I know I signed up for this but I had no ideal i would be so hard. :wub:
 
Date of surgery weight: 260
Date od surgery: 11/06/12
Weight today: 238
Age: 29
Mood: regret for putting myself in the situtation
Workout: 30 mins/2.2 incline 6 calories 205
 
Today I had to premire protein shakes at 30g of protein each and about 30oz of water so far.

So today is post op day 15. I did not get much sleep last night therefore i slept a large portion of the day. I still have a little soreness from the procedure so I'am going light on the exercising. Mentally I feeling ok but I must admit I miss eating alot. I guess I never thought that I would miss the act of eating and drinking so much. I know this sounds so bad but sometimes I just wish I could just chew some food.
 
Exercise:
30 minutes cardio: speed 2.2, incline 7, calories burned 303
50 sit ups
10 girl push ups
 
Food/liquids:
30 oz of plain water
11 oz (2) Priemier Protien chocolate shakes ( each 11oz shake contains 30g of protien 160 cals, and 1g sugar)
3 oz of pureed marie calender chicken pot pie
1 oz sugar free popsicle
 
Things I plan on working on tomorrow: being more active and not laying in bed all day and trying to get all 64ozs of fluids down.
 
Surgery date 11/06/12
Starting weight 260
Current weight 239

Well, I arrived in Mx this morning and yes still apprehensive to my decision. I had a layover in Las Vegas and thought about just flying back home. So, for those of you having second thoughts...its normal. I am probably on my hundredth.
 
If you are going to Aceves the driver is great and you meet your fellow sleevers right at the airport. Then off to the boarder about 2 hours. It will seem like you are off course, but I promise you, your on course.
 
You arrive and Karla or another coordinator will meet you with a smile and the off to the bathroom for urine sampling and then to the lab for blood. As everyone has stated the hotel is clean and the staff nice. Once you finish, Dr. Aceves and Campos will visit with the group to discuss the surgery and answer any and all questions...For those that have read some of my postings lately you can imagine I had a ton of questions and each was answered.
 
Once that is complete it is time for the chest X-ray and the EKG. Now the EKG machine was a bit old, but efficient. Then, you finish and off to the hotel, which is about 15 minutes from the hospital. Ernesto was our driver and very kind.
 
Now, I made have made it sound as if all of this took about an hour, but we were there for three hours. Tomorrow we all meet in the lobby and then to the hospital we go to meet with the internist, doctors, and anesthesiologist. Once, we are cleared for surgery then they decide the order and off we go. They said that is should take about 2 -3 hours from the time we go back until we wake up in recovery.
 
My surprise for the day was the blood thinner shot that you are given prior to surgery in your stomach.
 

OK, so I had a little bit of a set back today. After reading through other Sleevers blogs, and entries, I started noticing that I wasn't the only one who had a plan and a goal of when I had hoped to have surgery completed by. As I was reading, I saw a trend of people who had thought they were on the right track, only to be told they were going to have to wait longer. I'm one of them!
 
I have been doing the 6 months weight loss / program with Hills. Not the My True Body that held weekly classes, but I've had monthly weigh in's with my PCP, met still with a nutritionist, and completed the psych eval. What I wish, is that someone could have told me earlier to start getting my psych eval completed back in month 4 or 5 so not to wait any longer. The PE was completed on 11/12, but wasn't submitted to my PCP until yesterday, 11/26. Um, hello, what's the hold up?! I understand that there was a holiday in there, but really, two full weeks to make sure I'm of sound mind? That was frustration number 1! So yesterday, I speak with the PCP office, and they inform me that everything had been submitted, so I call the Insurance Coordinator to follow up with her, and don't hear back...so I call again today and she still hasn't received it. So back to the PCP doctor I go, and ask her to please follow up with the Coordinator, I'm dying to make this happen. Frustration #2: I hate not being in control. I'm always the one who does everything, for everyone, myself included. So not being able to receive the documents, and submit myself has been a bit frustrating.
 
I then call the surgeons office, speak to their coordinator to inform her of what is going on, and keeping her in the loop as we had a plan that I "should" be able to have everything completed by the end of the year...notice the quotes around "should", yea, Frustration #3! The coordinator informs me that she is now booking into the 2nd week of January! Now I know I didn't get unhealthy over night, and I know that I need to be patient, but the kicker in all this is that I'm getting married in 6 months, and I was hoping that I would have those 6 months to get used to my new body, new habits, new way of life, you know, the whole "NEW ME!" I'm afraid that the longer I have to wait, and the closer I get to my wedding, I'm going to turn into more of a basket case. Am I crazy to have WLS so close to my wedding, or am I just over thinking it? My job is planning weddings for other couples, so naturally, now that it's my turn, I'm close to having everything completed. However, I've been putting a lot of time and effort into researching the sleeve procedure, and getting myself ready and I had planned to start finalizing wedding details in January, you know, one big thing at a time...so tell me this, am I crazy??

Today is post op day 21. So I went back to work today, and I am beat. I guess I am kind of
shocked that I am so tired since my job is mainly sedentary. I did find having lunch was a
little awkward because I normally have a premier protein shake for lunch. I did manage to eat a couple bits of grilled chicken so for dinner I will have a shake. I am still having problems with getting 64oz of liquids down so if you have any suggestions please let me know. Surprisingly I had a couple of people notice that I have dropped 24 pounds. The recognition really made me feel good!
 
Keep up the Good fight!

Yesterday I learned that my doctors office submitted everything to my insurance company for approval, and now I have to wait, be patient, plan for the best etc....I hate being patient., I've always been in charge of my own life and now I'm putting it into someone elses' hands...I pray fr the best!!
 
Does anyone out there have Western Health Advantage / Hills insurance??
 
I can't wait to start my new journey, I'm so tired of this life and body!!

I won't lie to anyone it is hard work trying to live with out food as my crutch and sometimes (even with the surgery) I fall short of my ideal behavior when it comes to food. There are people who have told me that I've taken the easy way out. I disagree with them but I don't waste my breath arguing with them anymore. Even with the surgery I still have to closely monitor what I eat and be more active. The surgery has given me the help I need to lose weight but it doesn't mean that I woke up from the surgery cured of my old bad food habits. But I manage my eating much better. I'm encouraged that I'm moving closer to where I want to be. Good things that have happened to me since my surgery:
I can walk to my car without having to stop and take a breath
I'm not in constant pain because of my knees
I have given away over 10 bags of clothes that are way too big for me--I'm down 4 sizes so far
People sit next to me on the train (I used to feel so guilty taking up two seats when the train was crowded)
I cooked dinner at thanksgiving and it didn't wear me out --being on my feet for a few hours easy peasy
I look in the mirror and I recognize myself!
I do have a figure(my waist line is returning)
my bath sheets wrap around me there's no big gap!
there is really cute lingerie in my size
Oh my doctors have taken me off a couple of my meds
I realize I can only eat so much so I visually measure out a cup of food and that's my meal

There's a lot of little things but mainly I'm just thankful that I was able to do this surgery. I'm grateful that my insurance covered it and I'm grateful that I chose the right program. I feel really blessed by the whole experience problems and all.

I am on my way to Mexico in the morning to Dr. Aceves. My bags are packed, I have checked, rechecked, and triple checked what I may need. I am scared as the world, but I know that in about a month I will be ecstatic. I have thought about everything the could go wrong and decided to focus on what could go right. I do not have the co-morbidities, but fertility and joint problems. So, I have thought..can't I just do this myself? Then, I remind myself that I have been for the past 30 years and to no avail. I am in disbelief that I am taking such drastic measures. Plus, I am afraid as I lose the weight the comments I will get. Silly, right. Nevertheless, I will keep everyone posted and provide specifics of what they do.
 
I'm going to attempt to sleep, because I have an early morning and a life changing flight!

Well I'm now 3 weeks post-op, and I went in to my nutritional appointment at my sleeve doctor's office this morning. I now get to add eggs, cottage cheese, low fat cheeses, fish, canned chicken, tuna fish, beans(like black beans, kidney beans, soy beans) I can also have chili, and soups with beans now! It seems so great to be able to have more variety of things to eat! I was so sick of protein shakes, yogurt, and the few other things I could only have for the passed 5 weeks! At least at Christmas time I will get even more choices by then too. I have been feeling better day by day, and my 5 incisions are almost completely healed now as well.
I have lost a total of 69 pounds now since last April 2012 when I started my weight loss journey, and I have lost 15 more pounds since my sleeve surgery 3 weeks ago. I'm running out of clothes that fit me, because most are way to big for me now! What a great feeling to have clothes that a TO BIG! LOL I actually had to give my little sister some of my old clothes, because she wears 26 W like I use to wear. I'm now in a size 20 W, and it won't be long I'll be in a size 18 W. I'm hoping I will wear an 18 by my husband's shop Christmas party December 15TH, and get me a new outfit to wear to the Christmas party.
Last Christmas I went to the shop party wearing a size 26/28 W, 3 piece black pant suit. I was so self conscience the whole time at the party that I couldn't really enjoy myself. I looked around and thought, "I'm probably the fattest one here"! I couldn't wait to leave the party that night! This year I'm hoping my weight loss will help my self esteem, and I can enjoy myself with my husband this year. I have to get me an outfit that I feel good in, pretty, and allot thinner in. :wub: Better, healthier, thinner days are a head of me now, and I can't wait!

My Liquid diet is supposed to only be 10 days but I felt weird starting it on a Tuesday so I am starting it Sunday, Dec 9th. Sundays are such a chill day for me that it's easier for me to start on Sunday as opposed to Monday. I still need to stock up on stuff I can DRINK both before and after surgery. That's my goal between now and then.
 
Another goal accomplished: My passport came today! WAAAHOOOOOOOOOOO!
 
I bought some genie bras as recommended by some members here but theyyyyyyyy are not gonna wooooorrrrk. I am too busty for them and the band is really too stretchy. it doesn't hold anything in at all. I am going to look at some sports bras but... I dunno what to do about these Bosoms!

Am really at the end of my tether with it all now, feel like deleting the blog and go back to try and loose weight on my own, i am writing this blog to keep account of my life before and after the sleeve operation, but seriously wondering if i will ever have the op.
I have been waiting in hope every day that i would get a telephone call to tell me why my blood isnt clotting and what the treatment will be.
Why does it take this long, am sooo annoyed and fed up.
I have been trusting in God and patiently waiting and if wasn't for my faith in God i just don't know what i would do.
There is something inside that keeps me from walking away from it all and helps me to continue to hope and keep on with this, but i am still having to battle with my feelings which are at screaming point, my feelings say just give up and stay fat, but in me deep down i know that it is worth hanging on and keep waiting to get my operation, but it feels like i am hanging by my fingertips.
I have had a really bad time with gout, and fibromyalgia this last month, in fact it is so bad i have had to get a chairlift to get upstairs to go to bed, i can hardly walk and am desperate to get this weight off which will help my joints not having to carry so much weight.
It is 2 years in january since i first started the process and all the other people who started at the same time have had their ops and lost their weight.
I know it can always seem to be darker just before the dawn but, i need my dawn now.
I was told that i could ring my specialist nurse anytime which is good, but has she has never had this happen to a patient before she is in the dark too.
I can't ring the hospital because they say they are checking everyday and will ring me as soon as the results are back.
This limbo is driving me crazy, the not knowing is horrible.
The comments are wearing thin now, that it is better to be safe than sorry, i know, i know, i have never wanted something as much as i want this and that is why it is so hard, i have jumped through hoops, starved for two weeks, and then nothing, dissapointment is the worse thing.
Do i feel better for writing this, well, no not really, but as i am an honest person at least this hard part will be recorded and not glossed over.
God doesn't say we won't have problems in this life, but thank you God you are with me and i know that only you will bring me through this time and that stretching and growth hurts, ouch, but it will all work together for my good, i just don't like this going through it, i need to be carried for a bit, my legs are tired of walking, i need rest, those that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength like eagles on the wind, I am waiting Lord.
God is never late, always on time, His time. here endeth my blog for today. but hoping for in my next blog

its sooo nice to see you again! (NOT) So, I am about 10 days before surgery date and I cannot keep these crazy thoughts out of my head. I have been advised to stop all medication except for a multivitamin, and that includes stopping my anxiety medication. I feel like my anxiety and head is all over the place with crazy thoughts of the good and the bad 'could happens' of surgery...
 
Am I making the right decisions?
Am I loosing enough weight pre-op?
Will the surgeon say no if I do not loose enough weight? (No # was given)
What if there are complications?
Will I be able to take care of my son and house after surgery? (I will only have support for maybe a day or two)
What will life after surgery be like?
 
Just all of these thoughts swirling in my head...I am hoping that this is normal, and I am not the only one going through all of these thoughts.
 
I am going to call tomorrow to discuss being on my anxiety meds until surgery, and if not, other options...
 
-anxious mess!

This morning I weighed 184.Looking back at this blog I can see the weight is still coming off.Good!
 
I am having a very challenging time keeping my cals low while upping my protein.My hair is falling out like crazy again and I cannot figure out why.
 
I have also increased my healthy fats.We need them and for years now I've been low fat even when I was eating rubbish it was just saturated fats.Now,Im trying to teach my kids a balance and kids dont learn by telling them stuff.They learn by example.adding a tablespoon of olive oil per day has increased my cals with 133 wich puts me closer to 1000 than to 800.Cant really lower the food intake the I go low on protein again.Wont give up my milk in my coffee for no one...lol.Will keep tweaking this.I am different than others that mostly eat e same stuff every day as that sets me up for a snack attack..lol.I like variety and will keep making different things that is yummy!
 
The exercise is going a little better.Still havent started with a trainer but I am running and playing squash and doing reformer once a week now as it hurts my knees a lot.Will phone the trainer for an appointment today.I dont know why I am so resistant about the toning and weights with the trainer.Im scared I cant do what he wants me to.
 
Anyhoo,this is an ongoing process and last week I fitted at least 20 dresses for a big function we had this weekend.I fit in a 14 but I hate my stomach.This has now inspired me to lose faster and to start exercising more.Will post pics of the weekend on the yacht.It was awesome and I didnt feel self concious for the same reasons than before but because I got so many compliments.
 
O,just one more strange thing.This week about 5 different people asked me what Im doing to lose weight.These are all people that knows that I've had the surgery.So,to everyone that dont want to tell people.They dont care anyway and seem to forget or not really understand what it means...lol.Even though I told all of them again,they still want to know what diet Im following and still all say now they feel ashamed of not losing weight....tooo weird as hallo,I cut off 80% of my stomach,you cant compare yourself with that...lol
 
Time to get moving again.

So here we are on our way for another weekend away at the beach.At the moment I have a bad cold and flu.Didnt take any meds until just now.
 
I got some loritadine with pseudo noreffedrine (or something like that) Wasnt sure what it would do to my tummy and an hour and a half later I know it still doesnt like meds.Will take some nose spray and panadols from now on as I dont like this full swollen feeling I have on my tum now.
 
The fabulous thing is I HAVE LOST MY APPETITE now for aver a week.I think for the first time ever.After the sleeve I never once didnt feel like earing,now I just cannot even look at food.The bad thing is for the first time I am not getting enough protein and seeing as my hair is still falling out at 8 months,this is a bit of a worry.
 
Because I have severe bathroom issues since the sleeve my main focus is protein with ispagulla husk and vitamins as I am not absorbing the vits very well at all.When some labs looks ok,others drop.After reading some newish studies on iron deficiency 3 years out,I am very concerned about this.Iron supplements causes constipation for me and I cannot take it at all as an addition.Now,trying to eat enough food with enough iron seems quite impossible at the moment.When I eat enough iron rich veggies,I cant get enough protein.When I add the fibre supplement,it keeps me full for hours and hours and cannot eat enough of anything.
 
We dont find fibre gummies here and to import it I will have to permission from the ministry.Which I will tackle next week as why cant I just order it online and import it?There is a list of banned medications as long as life itself and I will have to check and see if fibre gummies is on the list...lol
 
I sometimes dont think people in the US realize how lucky they are to have all the resources that they do.Life is so much harder without some things.
 
At least the hotel food sucks so badly (really bad food for a 5 star) that I wont be tempted to eat too much.What is a challenge for me is the pina quiladas that I like way too much.Dont like other cocktails so am not tempted but this place makes a mean PQ.And the weather is stunning.Hot,but not too hot,clear skies!
 
This morning my weight was 188.Slow now,but at least coming down all the time.
 
I also finally arranged to work out with the personal trainer from monday next week as the holiday is around the corner and I am still like jelly!Hope I can at least tone some in the next 6 weeks.
 
Sometimes I do worry about the long term problems I see people have with the sleeve.Many have iron issues and others have GERD.I pray that the Lord have mercy on me as I dont know if my very expensive private expat medical insuarance will ever pay for anything related to the surgery.It is not always non compliance that causes complications sometimes its just bad luck.But it surely seems like a very fine balancing act to get enough protein,firbre and the correct amount of every vitamin we need.I think maybe drinking a protein shake every day forever might help some of the issues but not all of it.And not ever eating the food that I know will cause reflux (lots of experience with this and food does make a huge difference even though some people will not admit it)
 
Ok,long update.But quite necessary to see I have to go and get those protein pancakes with fibre that I made for breakfast (its almost dinner time here) and eat them.It feels somewhat aurreal to me to have to force myself to eat.Wish it could stay like this until goal!

Today I wish I was normal.Not only thin normal but not ADD or OCD and not I wish that I could take medication to "fix" me! All I wanted to do today was eat,all day long!I couldnt stop thinking about food for a minute.It was one of those me me me me days that I just hate.
 
And I wish I lived in a country where it wasnt such a mission to find a therapist that is going to stay put.But we are all expats,habitual movers!
 
Once I found a pill,for 2 weeks..lol.I went to my gp and said I am sick of myself and need something.He yanked a sample of Cymbalta out of his drawer and said try this and see me in 2 weeks,remember it only works after 10 days.After exactly 24 hours I knew that was what normal felt like.I was calm.My OCD was gone,my mind started focussing for the first time EVER!Didint have a 100 tracts playing in the head all at once!I could drive a car without it being a competition to see who wins,I could deal with life without the impending sense of doom and having to tell myself a million times a day that everything is fine,nothing to worry about.I slept a full night for the first time in my life and most important,my fear of people all but disappeared.
 
Then my kidneys function started being affected but I couldnt care less.After 10 days I could hardly walk but happy as I have ever been.Said they would have to wressle the little suckers out of my stone cold hand after my death.He just didnt give me a perscription and that was the end of that! Lol
 
I have been a born again Christian for 15 years now and the Lord have really changed me since then.But I am still me and non of the things I have considered very important like the above mentioned,have changed.I suppose there were so many other things that needed change that this might not even have made the list.I really love the Lord and I know He loves me but boy I wish He would renew my mind more! But He clearly has a plan for my life.And He clearly smiles patiently upon me when I tell Him to hurry up and change me more NOW!
 
Accepting ourself,warts and all, might be so important in a successful future with the sleeve.I am blessed beyond measure in so many aspects of life that I should be able to say its ok to be me.Its ok to not be perfect,its ok!
 
Well,it is the middle of the night now and close to my bed time.Tomorrow,or just now..hehehe...is a new day.I can put this one behind me,live just for the new one,not worry about the future and breathe.
 
God is good all the time and maybe I dont really need that pill.
 
 
 
 

Just got back from a beautiful wedding. I thought they would have food I could eat, so no worries. Well I was wrong, there was all pasta, and I'm on the Adkins type pre diet. Well thankfully they had salad and for the kids they had chicken nuggets. So I peeled off the breading from the chicken and cut it up in my salad and made my own dinner.
 
Got some exercise from dancing.
 
Any other diet I would have said, oh well, and ate what was there. I think I'm finally learning to adjust food to my requirements, not just go with the flow.
 
I hope I always stay true!