ladilushT

I am down 105 pounds and it has been almost a year...I'm so excited about my progress!!!!

I am down 105 pounds and it has been almost a year...I'm so excited about my progress!!!!

I am down 105 pounds and it has been almost a year...I'm so excited about my progress!!!!

I am down 105 pounds and it has been almost a year...I'm so excited about my progress!!!!

I am down 105 pounds and it has been almost a year...I'm so excited about my progress!!!!

I am down 105 pounds and it has been almost a year...I'm so excited about my progress!!!!

I am down 105 pounds and it has been almost a year...I'm so excited about my progress!!!!

I am down 105 pounds and it has been almost a year...I'm so excited about my progress!!!!

My son called for his daily chat, a time I really look forward to. He says, "How was your day?"
Well I've had a lovely day. I got to go into the office, work with a team of 6 very smart people, we all got some great thinking and work done. I was able to join them in the lunch I ordered for us, and I've extremely been productive all day. What were the first words out of my mouth in response to my son's question?
"Well, I'm still stalled."
WTH?? That's all I can think of to tell him about my day?? So he's a very insightful smarty-pants and he says to me, "Mom it was one thing to rely on the scale when you could say 'oh maybe I should cut down a bit tomorrow' and use the scale to monitor and adjust your eating habits. But really, what role does the scale play in your life now??"
For a change, I was speechless. Well he wasn't about to stop there. He carries on saying,
"Maybe you should ask yourself if it's healthy to let what you see on a scale determine your feelings of success for the day? After all you're doing what you need to, and you told me you were going to focus on process vs. the outcome. Would anything change in your process if you just threw away the scale for 3 months?"
No of course it wouldn't but can i throw away the scale for 3 months? I cannot. Why? Because maybe I'm sick in the head and I associate my self-worth with success or failure at pounds lost. Not what I do to succeed, but whether the scale says I've lost weight today.
Unlike a lot of people here, over the last few years i could NOT lose weight. I could control my calories, my cardio-vascular health, what I put in my mouth, but I couldn't control my weight. Yet I continued to judge myself by my ability to lose weight. Not by my ability to do what was healthy, but whether or not I could lose weight. I may have been sleeved, but apparently that way of judging myself still persists.
So really, I ask all of you.... if we are eating our Protein, drinking our Water, and exercising to the degree that we can, what role does or should the scale play in our lives when we're trying to lose weight? Should we not focus on the process, monitor the crap out of the Protein and Water and calories, and let the scale go off on a long hike to TImbuktoo? And can you do that? Why not?
what do you think?
(Note, I'm in the dreaded 3-week stall, I know this, I accept it, so it's not about the stall. It's about how we judge ourselves by using criteria or outcomes that are outside of our control).

Make your choice and explain it in the discussion forum!

I have ignored the " how much have you lost question" every time I have been asked. I think it's like asking a woman in her 50's how old she is...it's rude and it shouldn't be done. Most obese people don't advertise their actual weight on a daily basis....so why would they want to discuss it with others now? If people want to say something it would be better to say your looking good and move on. If we want to offer more info we will.

I think part of the problem is that we are more than a weight on a scale. I want people to notice me, not my weight. I've tolo my family that the best way to be supportive is to not treat this like a big deal, it's just something I'm doing to be more healthy. I actually find it annoying that personal questions about ones weight are considered acceptable.

It has gotten annoying at work. Everyday, the same people ask "so, how much today?". The skinny minny comments I hate too. I realize that they see what I don't see in the mirror. However, I delight in my husband's giggles as he discovers something different about my body-hip bones, the hollows of my neck, or the trail down my spine. He is my biggest fan, and only his opinion matters to me.

I completely agree I do it all the time!!!! When I went to my baratric seminar I was thinking gosh I'm so much smaller than most people here.....in hind site I'm embarrassed because a picture says a thousand words!!!!

Yeah I have this same issue. I walk around thinking I look pretty good and then I see a picture of myself or see myself in a full-body mirror and I cringe because my largness surprises me.
It's better than having body dysmorphia because I will be satisfied with my results even if I never reach goal weight. I can still remember when I was 180lbs, size 12/14 in college and I felt so good about myself and I was still overweight. So really it's a matter of my body catching up to my mind, not the other way around.

Yesterday when I was getting my pre-surgery labs drawn I had a reality check. I don't always see my "bigness." I know what my scale says, and what my BMI is. I know it's been getting harder to fit into restaurant booths and that I've had to buy a larger size of clothing the last several months. I have losing weight on my mind constantly, and am so anxious for this surgery so I can finally do it. Despite that, I often look into the mirror and feel like I'm still proportioned well even with the fat.
So I was sitting there, and my stomach was partially sitting on the arm rest bar they swing down in front of you. At the same time, there was a pregnant woman having a test for gestational diabetes, and was having her timed blood drawn. She looked like she was 7-8 months along, and when she sat in the chair with the arm rest in place, she still had about 5 inches between her belly and the bar! How is it that I don't see what I really look like? In pictures I do. I totally do. Pictures show the true story, and show my proportions and size for what they really are. But I don't recognize it in the mirror. Is this denial? Or what the heck?
When I had my gallbladder out last year, I was unpleasantly surprised that I had to use one of the larger hospital gowns, and they had to use the large size blood pressure cuff rather than the regular size. I was shocked. My arm doesn't look that big to me. This is an interesting phenomenon to me and I'm just curious what others have to say about it. Has anyone else experienced this? Does it change after surgery?

Surgery is literally around the corner ; I must admit I'm a bit nervous ... This is my first surgery ever .. But I can't wimp out now there is too much positive outcome that comes from this blessing so I can't wait till I'm on the losers bench July 13 is the day ..... I'm calling it my rebirth!!!! I was also born on a Friday the 13th so ill considerate good luck
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Wear nice clothes, walk for exercise again. Fit in a pair if mid cut jeans without having half my behind come out the top. Allowing my picture to be taken. Come out of hiding.

I want to wear a flattering swimsuit on the beach. I want to run a half marathon. I want to wear beautiful dresses without worrying that my Spanx are showing. I want to cross my legs effortlessly. I need to make a list of hundred things I want to do when I get to my goal weight!

I have laughed and cried while reading these posts! It is good to know I'm not the only one who feels this way! My husband has never said anything negative about my weight, but I always hesitate to go do things (ie. company picnics, reunions, large family gatherings) with him because I don't want to embarrass him. I would love to get rid of that feeling! I also look forward to possibly getting pregnant (we've been doing fertility treatments for 6 years), outdoor sports like kayaking, hiking, ziplining...pretty much all the things already mentioned!

You know I feel like if I do have any flabby skin or hanging fat, anything is better than how i look now, you know? ****, if I can lose 100 to 150 pounds? I DONT CARE WHATS SAGGING!! lol. I'm gonna show that **** off! Lol!

I agree with the seats. I pay more for a movie theater with lifting arms. Went to an amusement park 50 lbs ago and the skinnly little wench locked down so hard on my legs i wanted to scream.....then the stupid ride got stuck. sat like that for 15 minutes and it seemed like hours. Now, if I get on the ride at all, i keep my legs up just so it wont happen again and I lok it down myself. However, I don't get on many rides now...terrified they'll tell me I cant fit. Not to mention the pain of walking around.