MamaM

I agree with the other responses, I think that it can be interpreted in different ways. I personally would suggest that you observe the situation a bit more. If she did it again, I would contact her directly and say hey I appreiciate your concern for my well being but you can contact me directly rather than my hubby. This will elminate any confusion and basically let her know that your hubby does communicate with you and you are very aware of her so called "concern".

I am just back from a day night date with my hubby!! We went to Fredricksburg, TX for some fun, relaxation, shopping and FOOD! I was really worried how this was going to go....
First day there - we went to Mamacita's for lunch. He ordered the crispy taco plate and been and cheese nachos. I ate one taco (shredded beef and cheese with hotsauce) and half of a nacho! It was wonderful, tasty and I was stuffed! He ate the rest plus 2 beers and several beautiful home made tortillas!!
For dinner - we went to a great German restaruant - and he had the Schnitzel Kase, and I was dismayed to see very little I could eat. I settle on the Klopse meat balls (beef and pork) and of course it came with a huge pile of buttered noodles and saurkraut. The meat balls were in a caper dill sauce - and there were 2 about 3 oz each - so I plopped the other on his plate and set in. Big problem - the meat ball had a lot of bread filling in it. I ate about 3/4 of it - and could feel it EXPAND in my belly. Luckily, we did a lot of walking afterwards, and 30 min. after - I started back with my Water - so no pain!
We slept in the next day, so hit town about 11. He had a hpme made burger plate - I had half an order of quiche Lorraine - yum! Dinner that night was another German place - he had schnitzel, I had an appetizer called German Rueben rolls. Basically, 2 egg rolls made with corned beef, swiss cheese and saurkraut - with thousand island dipping sause! I ate almost all of it - super good!
We did buy some Amish cheese we snacked on in our B&B that night, and I feel like I really didn't miss out on the food end....and don't feel bad about myself. I know I probably didn't hit my 60g of Protein, but I will be back on track tomorrow and have fish and shrimp thawing in my sink!
I was really worried about the "enjoying" food aspect after this surgery. I have to pay more attention, but do not feel deprived at all. I am so thankful!!!!

Thanks to everyone, I think I will wait. My mother is a watercolor artist and I'm going to have her come up with a floral design that they can duplicate so that way i'll always have a piece of her with me. I appreciate everyone's response.

THANK YOU!
I don't understand the theory that now you've had surgery, your new normal should be to lose 5-10lbs a day! Oh and we must be doing something wrong if we're not!!! And these are bariatric people talking like this! Not clueless family, friends and acquaintances!!!!
To be honest, I'm in a very different place than most people. I never thought I'd be offered a revision. I expected to have to deal with my band the way it was and just do the best I could to NOT gain. I never thought I'd ever lose weight again. I was trying to be happy with were I was at.
So, no, I don't get where people are coming from when they are upset with their weight losses.
I try to be positive and let people know how wonderfully well they are doing and support some of that process. I don't know what is in another person's head or where they are in their own daily lives.

Next time this happens, put it back on them!
"When can you have (ex.) soda again?"
"Why would I want too?"
And leave it at that. No need to explain your position. They need to explain theirs!

Almost paid 50$ went to goodwill got it for 4$ Lucky me!!

Next time this happens, put it back on them!
"When can you have (ex.) soda again?"
"Why would I want too?"
And leave it at that. No need to explain your position. They need to explain theirs!

Next time this happens, put it back on them!
"When can you have (ex.) soda again?"
"Why would I want too?"
And leave it at that. No need to explain your position. They need to explain theirs!

Next time this happens, put it back on them!
"When can you have (ex.) soda again?"
"Why would I want too?"
And leave it at that. No need to explain your position. They need to explain theirs!

Hmm, no response yet? He messaged me earlier in the week (we live in the same city). At that point he had lost 45 pounds and sounded like he was doing well. He's back to work now. I guess that's all I'll report now and let him give you the details!

At 23 you are an adult and were mature enough to do your research. I just pointed out a pattern of immaturity regarding nutrition and decision making which at 18-20 appears to seriously lacking. Whoever their surgeons are it appears they did not do their due diligence for their patient.

I think that's a little bit of a condescending generalization towards younger folks. I'm 23- yes I'm young. Do I know what Im in for? Absolutley. I've researched this for years, learned the dos and donts. It's not fair to assume all young people lack the maturity to go through this. Yea there are some who are young and may not be ready for this change, but ive seen older folks messing it up too so i dont think age is the number one determining factor. I agree it is more about maturity and commitment then age. I do agree that more counseling isn't a bad thing but I think regardless of age most could benefit from it.

I would agree that it's a maturity thing, but not an age thing. I'm 19 and I'm doing just fine. However, the idea of having such a life altering change at a young age may seem a little more drastic so I can see why people my age would be freaking out a little more.

I became a vegetarian POST op and am loving my new life- I eat absolutely NO meat and only get my protein from plant based diet. I have never felt better...

I guess I would fall in to this category.
I don't believe in eating all Protein all the time. Now that I'm about 8 weeks out and off the graduated post-op eating plan, I have no restrictions on things. I am slowly trying the foods that I love and going back to my "normal" way of doing things. Meaning, I tend towards more of a veg diet. I love my veggies (which also have protein BTW) and don't normally eat a lot of meat. I don't believe in low-carb but I do watch some of the sugars in things. I tend to not eat a lot of bread but when I do it's usually a whole grain or a cracker-type of some sort.
Lots of veggies. fruit. Whole grains. Lean meats. And cheese and eggs when I want 'em.

I guess I would fall in to this category.
I don't believe in eating all Protein all the time. Now that I'm about 8 weeks out and off the graduated post-op eating plan, I have no restrictions on things. I am slowly trying the foods that I love and going back to my "normal" way of doing things. Meaning, I tend towards more of a veg diet. I love my veggies (which also have protein BTW) and don't normally eat a lot of meat. I don't believe in low-carb but I do watch some of the sugars in things. I tend to not eat a lot of bread but when I do it's usually a whole grain or a cracker-type of some sort.
Lots of veggies. fruit. Whole grains. Lean meats. And cheese and eggs when I want 'em.

I have Migraines also. I take Maxalt-MLT and it dissolves on my tongue. It is not a narcotic either. I even got a Migraine after my surgery and convinced the nurse to let me take one of my own I had brought from home (she said what she didn't see didn't happen and proceeded to leave the room - ha!) and it worked great. I have been taking them for a very long time and they still work. Hope this helps and I wish you the best of luck!

First of all, tell your husband to put down the burger. That is not very helpful to eat it right in front of you. Secondly, in this case, I would say it is head hunger, a craving. It looks good, it smells good, you want to taste it. If you say you are feeling full, then it is your head playing games with you.
I do feel hungry, and I think others do as well. But I can tell you it is not the same as before surgery, and it is usually after I have not eaten for 5 plus hours. I DO still have head hunger and cravings though and that is the toughest part to overcome with surgery. You can have your stomach cut out, but not your brain, and your brain accounts for a big portion as to why you gained weight in the first place. And honestly, my taste buds have not changed. chocolate to me tastes just as good now as it did before. Everyone is different though, and many say that when they actually eat the burger, fried, pizza, chocolate, whatever, it doesn't taste as good.
I do agree about the PPI's (proton pump inhibitors). Sometimes excess acid production can feel like a rumbly tummy, so make sure you talk to your doctor about it.

The hunger pains could also be healing pains. You *cut your finger, it throbs, so does your stomach and it feels the same as hunger pains and also acid can contribute to it.
The wanting to grab the sandwich is head hunger, it's an emotional thing. If you start looking at it analytically, it sometimes helps you to deal with it.
Best of luck to you.

This is not hunger. This is head hunger. Your body is not hungry, you only think it is and want it. It is all a mental thing that takes some time to get over. But you need to acknowledge it now as you not really being hungry or else you will start to confuse the two and eat when you don't need to.
It is tough but it can be overcome.

Holy SMOKES!
you guys are amazing! Thank you to everyone for all the love, support and prayers. I am so overwhelmed to log on this morning for the first time in a WHILE to see all these questions and prayers sent out for me . It honestly chokes me up! Thank you so much!
So here's an update, although its not much! Wish I had more but the truth is, no one knows what to tell me, they usually never find neuroendocrine cancer in someone my age! Usually its caught when people are older and when its too late to do much. So needless to say I am being featured in all sorts of studies! haha.
I go to Dana Farber In Boston at noon today!I am hoping they do more tests, i havent had much testing done to ensure that the cancer is no where else. they said this tumor i had was a low grade and may have been the beginning of all of the tumors. I saw the local oncologist about two weeks ago who told me unfortunetly that I MAY NOT BE ABLE TO GET THE SLEEVE. I am so heartbroken over this because I have put so much money and time into this journey, between support groups, pre op groups, psychologist, nutritionist, physical therapy, etc. But I am forever in debt to god for choosing this path for me, for pushing me toward getting the sleeve, so that with the endoscopy they found my cancer! I have been talking ALOT with doctors, surgeons, oncologists, etc to hopefully be able to tie in a weight loss with the upcoming surgery i will have (AGAIN!). They want to remove the whole area where the tumor resided. They say if not removed, it will come back over and over again. And we truly do not want that! I wish they had just done that when we had the last procedure. LAME! They are talking about the "whipple procedure" to fully remove my duodenum, part of my pancreas, and part of my stomach. the problem is, with this procedure, i am then a diabetic. I am hoping they could just do the sleeve, remove my duodenum, and that be it.. but we will see... im also trying to get them to consider the gastric bypass (although totally not my first choice). then when they bypass the stomach and duodenum they could just take both out and GOODBYE CANCER HOME!
It was really sad when I got the call yesterday from my surgeons office for the sleeve "Ms. Stevens I am proud to inform you that your insurance has approved you for the sleeve. How would August 13th work for you?" I was so sad. Because I can't say yes no matter how bad I want to! I want the sleeve more than anything. But I know my overall health with the cancer is first and foremost. So we will see what the specialist at Dana Farber says today and maybe I can convince her to help me get sleeved! Did I mention my health insurance is up in October? I will be turning 26 and no longer allowed on my parents insurance. So ALL of this needs to happen STAT! I will figured something out, but at this point i am having a hard time trying to find a job. I can't commit to anything right now not knowing what the future holds for surgeries and appointments. But I plan to work again soon i hope. I am however thrilled to be staying home with my daughter full time .
Speaking of my Sweet, Sweet Caroline, she is fantastic. She will be 14 months in just two more days. She's talking like you wouldn't believe. All day, "mama, whats that?" she's a little genious. I will share a pic of her on here Hope she can make you all smile. Happy Friday, and thank you so much for all the love and support. I am so thankful to have such a support group! I honestly havent told anyone about the cancer besides my immediate family, and i suppose the hundreds of you sleevers! You rock my world guys! I have so much love for alll of you! I will update soon!!! xxxoooo

When do you think this philosophy starts? I've heard some people say "never" and others that have said "as soon as you're on real food". What's your opinion? I think that once you're fully healed and on solid foods, this is great philosophy. For me, this was a way to live a normal life and have a normal relationship with food, NOT to have to think about Protein and carbs all day, every day. That just feeds my obsession (and why I failed at programs like Weight Watchers). I just don't want to have to think about it. I want to be able to eat a sandwich, if I want a sandwich. A salad, if I want a salad. Or even a piece of pizza or a bit of hamburger, if I want that. The point, for me, is to be able to say "I'm full" and stop eating after one piece of pizza or 1/4 of a burger.
What are your opinions?

AND I went to the gym too! Only did 30 minutes, but this was my first time back since surgery. Yay!!!
Now I just need to clean my house. Boo!

Sounds like a successful day. Triumph over old habits - asked for help; not giving in to emotional eating; insisting unreliable relative do the right thing; clean clothes; and a new idea for independence from said deadbeat relation.
All this and a trip around the world. Hoo ha.

On a side note, some of you might wonder, "Why doesn't she invest in getting a washer and dryer already??" I ask myself the same question, because it's nothing to do with the expense. But right now, my life is just in a state of flux. You see, after I lose the weight, I want to take a trip around the world. So when I weigh the costs of buying appliances (and then storing them when I leave) with using that same money for my trip, well savings wins out!