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In all honesty, I don't think the surgery itself does anything to relationships. If a relationship ends in light of surgery, there were problems long before that. I think a couple of things happen. I think a lot of people are already in unhealthy relationships, but they stay because they have such low self worth that they think it is the best they can do. After surgery, we start to gain more confidence and feel better about ourselves. In turn, people end of leaving their significant other because they realize they are worth so much more. In your case, I think your husband is just using it as an excuse. If he truly loved and respected you, he would have been there for you instead of fooling around on you. I agree that counseling is a good route, but staying together just for your daughter's sake is never a good way to go. How often do we hear people saying they stayed together for the children, when, in reality, it was the worst thing for them. My husband has been nothing but supportive and my biggest cheerleader. He loved me at my heaviest and he loves me now. Best of luck with everything and do some deep soul searching to figure out what is best for everyone, including yourself!

mmm, not sure if you would be allowed yogurt or not, but greek yogurt is very high in protein. You could add sugar free flavoring syrup like torani and blend in a blender to make it more liquid so you can sip through a straw. sugar free syrups are also great for changing the flavors of your shakes.

Breaking up is never easy to do, it is going to hurt no matter how good or bad the relationship is. But sometimes you have to make the best decision for yourself and the other person involved, even if that means going through the pain for a little while. Someone above posted that if you have to ask yourself whether that person is the one or not, they aren't, and I totally agree. I have been with my husband for over 13 years, married for 9 of those years. I love him more now than I did in the beginning. I can tell you that I never look at him disgusted or can't stand being around him. Things are not always perfect, no relationship is without its ups and downs. But after 5 years if you do not know still, it is not the right relationship for you. You did the right thing. You might need to tell him to stop sending you messages. If not, change your number. Him constantly trying to get back together is not going to make things easy and is only going to make you feel guilty. A therapist once told my brother (he can not let go of relationships and keeps hounding ex-girlfriends) that constantly pressuring the other person about getting back together is a form of abuse, and I think it is true. He is insecure and knows that he can't control you anymore, and it is driving him crazy. Hang in there, it will get better. You are going to need to cut ties and heal though for it to happen. You are starting a new chapter in your life in a number of ways. Embrace the new person you are growing into and the new life that you are starting!

So, before surgery, I never even weight myself to see if my weight fluctuated throughout a month due to hormones or not. Now that I am at goal and fairly stable, I am more in tune with my body then I ever was before. And it is driving me CRAZY! I have weight fluctuations throughout my cycle that leave me scratching my head...what is my real weight!? Ovulation = 2-4 lbs weight gain plus bloating for about a week. Then I go back down to normal for less than a week, and then back up 2-4 lbs during PMS until the tail end of my period, then BOOM, back down 2-4 lbs overnight. Then I will stay there for 2 weeks until ovulation starts again. I am a logically person and know that this is probably pretty normal, but none-the-less, it is driving me CRAZY!!!! Anyone else have this experience?? Any confirmation that this is normal and I am not alone would be great!!

MEWS, yes, talk to your DR as soon as you can. That is NOT normal at 4 months post op. I am almost 20 months post op and I do not regret having the surgery at all! The first month is the absolute hardest, so you cannot look at it as the way the rest of your life will be. I can guarantee you that you will be able to eat normally again. I have a normal, healthy diet now...and can still indulge without the guilt. I do have the odd moment when I am eating something really good that I wish I could just eat a little more. Then I remember something that someone else said at a support group meeting... "If I could, I would...and that is what got me to the point of wanting surgery in the first place". Plus, I always remind myself that did I spend $10K (self pay), fly alone to Mexico (when I had never flown in my life), and have 80% of my stomach removed just to fail and let food rule me again. Not a chance! The reward of being a normal size, being able to buy whatever clothes I want, and feeling good about myself is worth much more than the indulgence of food ever did. All the food ever did was A) make me gain weight, and make me feel guilty and miserable because I would always eat too much, feel bad that I did, then eat more to shove down the bad feelings. Give yourself time, it gets so much easier and you will not barely even remember the first few weeks after a while!

I never had this problem, and I am almost 20 months post op and still do not drink with my meals. Maybe you could try starting with stuff that has more liquid in it, chili, stews?? Practice with that, and then try other things. Is it certain foods that bother you, or is it everything?? The reason we are not suppose to eat in drink is for 2 reasons. One, it can make you throw-up...and no one wants that! The other reason is that drinking with meals helps liquify the food in your stomach and it passes through faster then you feel hungry sooner. At my support group meetings they use the analogy of a clogged sink (sounds gross when you think about it). How do you get the clog going, you rinse with Water and it goes through faster. My plan says no liquids 15 mins before and 30 mins afterward. I ALWAYS drank with my meals, but now it is a habit not to. I do like the shot glass idea..1 oz of liquid shouldn't make a difference, just enough to moisten the food as you are swallowing. Just watch that you do not start drinking more and more with every meal...always just keep the shot glass!

For sure! 2 drinks and I am done like dinner!

You are really early out, it is pretty normal. You are still healing and it is very difficult to get enough food in. I was really tired and weak for a while afterward. You really have to work at getting enough Protein in, and it is not easy in the beginning. But don't worry, as you get further out and heal, you will be able to eat more, and for most people, food starts to taste good again. I am 19 months post op and do feel hungry sometimes, but I can tell you it is not the same as before. It is not that starving, tummy rumbling feeling. And it usually only comes if I haven't eaten in a long time, like over 5 hours. The biggest battle is head hunger as you get further out.

I agree with italianlady. You do not have to give up all the foods you love, that is the beauty of the sleeve. However, you have to learn to treat certain foods exactly as that, treats. I still have ice cream, but only once in a while, and I only have a small cone. Also, emotional eating is a big struggle for most of us, so it is important to get that under control. You do have to realize that you will have to change your eating habits or you will not be successful. The sleeve is an amazing tool, but it is a tool, and you can sabotage it if you try. I have to young children myself, they were 15 months and 3 when I went for my surgery, and I did it partly for them too. I wanted them to have a healthy Mommy. I know you are scared, but it really is worth it. You have to think about what is more important in life, the food you love, or your family and your health. When you look at it that way....

Although it can happen, I don't think it happens too often. As for the number of calories, I just read on another thread the recent studies show that people that are overweight/formerly overweight, need to consume 20% less calories than an average person of the same weight to maintain. But, like someone else said, there are a lot of variables there. Men need more calories than women, and people that are very active need more calories. And when I say very active, I mean running races. I just read an article in Women's Health that unless you are doing more than 60 mins of strenuous activity everyday, you do not need to eat more and can actually end up stalling your weight loss by over estimating how many calories you need. I think another problem that comes into play is numbers. Some people set unrealistic goals and have to work extremely hard to get there. But once they get there, it is almost impossible to maintain. Then they are disappointed when they gain 5 or 10 lbs back, but that is where their body wants to be. PS, I am 19 months post op, and it is really easy to consume a lot of calories. Before 6 months, it is easy and eating 1200 calories seems almost impossible and so many people say "Oh, I can't imagine eating that much!". Trust me, it will happen. I still have great restriction and can't eat a lot at a sitting, but some things go down easier than others and I really have to watch what I eat. Like Many have said, the sleeve is a great tool, but you still have to change the way you eat. Sure you can loose eating crappy in the beginning, but once you get a couple of years out, those bad habits are going to catch up with you!

It happens to everyone, you did not fail. The best thing about the sleeve is that it is really easy to get back on track. Today is a new day, so forget about yesterday and start fresh! I had a stint about 8 months after my sleeve that I really started slipping. One morning I woke up and had an epiphany...did I really spend all this money, fly to Mexico alone and have 80% of my stomach removed to fall back into old habits and let myself down! After that day, I started exercising more and making better food choices. Now, 18 months post op, I do have bad days, but the next day I just get back into my routine. And I also allow myself treats here and there without beating myself about. It is never too late to start over! And unlike the past where we would gain 20, 30, or 50lbs if we fell off the wagon, with the sleeve, you either don't gain, or you only gain a small amount and it is much easier to get rid of! Don't be so hard on yourself. It is that cycle of shame and guilt that will get you spiraling downward.

I just made these the other day and then let them sit overnight in a container like the recipe online suggests. I made a pizza bun out of them, ham, onion, pizza sauce and mozza cheese. Not too bad at all. I haven't tried them yet like a bun, but I will! I got 9 out of the recipe.

I hope I do not get a lot of backlash, but I just need someone to talk to. I am 18 months post op and I have finally reached my goal weight. I have went from a size 20-22 to a size 6 and have lost 81lbs since surgery and 121lbs from my highest. The problem is I struggle everyday trying to wrap my head around my new body. I look at other women and always wish I was as small as them, and then my husband says "You Are", but I just can't seem to believe him. I go into stores, and the sales clerk will say I need a size small, and I know I do, but it still almost feels wrong. Even when I look at more recent pictures of myself, I still struggle. I have been heavy my entire life, right from Kindergarten. I was constantly teased and ridiculed for much of my life. So it is a lifetime of body image issues to try to overcome. Plus, I also have pretty bad skin hanging in my stomach and arms, but cannot afford plastics at the moment..so I am sure that does not help. I have been going for counseling to try to deal with my issues. Is there anyone else out there that has really struggled?? What helped you to overcome it??

Please do not compare yourself to others. Everyone loses differently, and people that are heavier lose it faster in the beginning as well. It just gets depressing if you start comparing. Try to look at it in perspective...do you think you would have ever lost 35lbs and 6-8 dress sizes in just 7 weeks!! You are doing amazing! It has taken me 18 months to reach my goal, and I couldn't be happier. It was slow going, but I just steadily lost little by little. And I know that I would have never lost 81lbs in 18 months on my own. I know because I had done it before, once losing 83lbs, once losing 70lbs. It took me over 2 years both times, and extreme dieting and extreme exercise to get there. With my sleeve as a tool, I can live my life fairly normally and still lose. I am like you, when I had my surgery done, my children were 14 months and 3 years. I find it hard to fit in exercise, so I aim for 2-3 times per week if I can, and I stay very active with my children. This is your own journey, so celebrate the amazing success that you have had!

I saw someone mention BIOSIL, and I would like the second that. You can get it in liquid drops or pill form. It is not the same as Biotin. It is a silicone supplement, and I found that it was the only thing that helped me. It also helped my eyelashes grow and my nails grow. The liquid is nasty, make sure to mix it well in a little bit of juice.

Thank you for this post. It took me a long time to accept that I was a slower loser. It has taken me 18 months to reach my goal of losing 80lbs, and I couldn't be happier. I know I would have never lost that much in that amount of time without my sleeve. I have lost around the 80lbs mark before, but it took grueling works outs and strict dieting to the point to exhaustion. With my sleeve as a tool, I am able to watch what I eat and live an active lifestyle but not feel deprived! I know it is not easy, but try not to compare to others. Everyone loses at different rates, some people have more to lose and drop a lot more in the beginning than others (I know someone who has lost over 200lbs in the same amount of time that I have lost 80, but she still weighs more than I did when I started for example). This is your journey, so take the time to Celebrate your own victories and successes because they are yours and no one else's!

Ok, Sausage Wallet made me laugh out loud while my husband is sitting at the table. So I had to explain. He agreed that it is a good one! So now my 2 cents worth.... A little on the saggy side, I am 121 lbs lighter than my heaviest, 81 lbs lighter since surgery. I am hoping when I get a tummy tuck, it will help lift that area a little, especially just above there. AND... Skinny Sex is AMAZING!!! WOW is all I can say. I like me some good loving, and have always enjoyed it, but now! My husband and I can just get closer, try different positions, it is awesome!!! I always used to feel my fat getting in the way, not anymore!! I really did not think of it when I was getting the surgery. I was looking forward to feeling more confident, but the way everything feels has improved too! Something to look forward to everyone!!!

It did this http://www.venusianglow.com/2010/07/tutorial-tightening-bra-band-without.html It doesn't work with cup size, but helps with band size. I also bought new hooks and made the band tighter that way for a little while. Your straps are closer together, but it makes them last a little longer!

It sounds like you are doing fine to me. It has not even been 2 months and you have lost 34lbs! You have to stop and think of how amazing that is and try not to compare to others. Stalls are totally normal. I have had stalls that last anywhere from a couple of weeks to a couple of months, especially the farther out you get (I am 18 months post op). People with less the lose a lot of times do not lose as fast, but you have to look at it percentage wise. I know someone that lost over 200 lbs in 1 year. That being said, she still weighs more than I did before my surgery. Lastly, do not get discouraged. I was a slow loser. I had 80lbs to lose. I lost the first 55lbs in the first 6 months, and I just reached my goal about week ago. I have learned not to compare. In the past I have lost weight, once 80lbs and once 70lbs on my own. It took me over 2 years of killing myself to do it. I would have never lost 80 lbs in 18months without the sleeve. Hang in there!

I occasionally overeat and end up throwing up, but not that often. Does it just come up, or do you make yourself throw-up to help it feel better?? Sometimes I have pain, but I just wait it out and it usually goes away in a couple of minutes. I know one person that her sleeve was made to tight on the bottom, so she had lots of problems with vomiting because it would literally get clogged on the way down. She had an endoscopy done and they were able to open it up a little so that food could pass through a little easier. You might want to check into having a swallow done to check it all out.

I was sleeved November 29, 2010 self pay in Mexico. I just reached my goal weight about a week ago, 81 lbs gone since surgery, 121lbs gone from my highest weight. It was the best thing I have ever done for myself and would do it all over again!!

I agree, at only 2 weeks out, eating those Cookies is not a good idea. sugar free Jello or popsicles are a great idea. Or sugar free pudding, it is sweet and rich so it will fill you up too. Also, if you find a Protein Shake that you like that is sweet, try that. I had a vanilla one that tasted like a vanilla milkshake, and a chocolate one that tasted like chocolate milk. By eating those cookies so early out, you are setting yourself up for a bad start. The first few months of the sleeve is the best time to help establish good new habits. The sleeve is an amazing tool, but remember, it is exactly that, a tool. It is not a magical cure, and you can eat a lot of things that are slider foods that will sabotage your efforts. It doesn't mean you will never get to eat any treats again, it just means you have to learn to treat them exactly for what they are, treats. Good luck finding something that you enjoy to replace those cookies!

I have tried the zucchini noodles with a julienne peeler. I used a little margarine and some salt on mine instead of pasta sauce. I really like zucchini, so I liked it. I also eat the real thing though, but in moderation. I couldn't eat pasta for the first at least 6 months, it made my stomach upset. Now I can eat a little, and I do enjoy it, just not very often. Treat the regular stuff like a treat. Good for you for looking for alternatives. As for the spaghetti squash, it sounds like you did not cook it long enough. I am not an expert though, but if it is tough, leave it a little longer. Good Luck!

Wow, does not sound right at all, not 14 months out. The only time I have vomitted is if I have eaten too much. And it has never been that I could never make it to the bathroom. That really sounds like she is either having some major issues that she needs to talk to a doctor about or she has develop a eating disorder. She really needs to discuss with her doctor though. I know one person that their sleeve was made too tight at the bottom and she threw up a lot. They did an endoscopy and were able to stretch it enough that food could pass through. Everything was getting stuck when it hit the narrow part and had no where to go but back up. I am 18 months out, and I know a lot of sleevers, and not many have that problem. Usually problems with vomitting are in the first couple of months due to swelling, acid, and adjusting eating habits.

I have lost just over 120lbs and need a tummy tuck. It is not so bad that I get infections or anything like that, but it is pretty saggy. I also have had 2 children and gained and lost weight repeatedly. I also have been overweight since Kindergarten, so my tummy has been stretched for a lot longer than some that gained weight later in life. I think it just depends on the person. You have to see how you feel about it, whether you feel it is bad enough to warrent a tummy tuck and then go from there!