jessiquoi

for me, a lot of the problem with this obsession is that i've told very few people that i'm having wls. all they know is that i'm getting flaky lol. i mean, i AM a bit flaky, but not at work! now i do things like take full days off to go to a doctor appt, and take a lot of days off just cause i don't feel like going in.

all i can think about is getting my sleeve. all i want to do is read and write on the forums. the only things in my calendar that mean anything to me are the appointments for my pre-op tests... everything else is a waste of my time. is my obsession unusual? i'm finding myself less than engaged at work, which is a first. i usually forget everything else while i'm at the office, i've always been very good at compartmentalizing. i resent the time spent doing anything that does not lead toward my surgery. can you relate?

i wasn't sure i was going to go to any, because i feel so very well supported here in the forum. my group requires you to attend one, and i had done that the same evening i went to the info session (the support group follows the info session every month). there were only four people there who had had their surgery already, myself and one other woman who were in the pipeline, and about 20 people who stayed after the info session who weren't committed yet. i am glad i went. it was very reassuring to meet people who had surgery from my chosen surgeon and were doing well. they were between 6 months and 3 years post op. three had lost way over 100 lbs and maintained it, and the one who was 6 months out was doing great too. i think i will continue to attend the monthly meetings. as much as i adore the forums here, it felt good to be part of a "live" community. i wanted to share this in case any of you were deciding whether to seek out a local support group.

awesome!

All, thank you for your support. Your messages meant the world to me! @@BeagleLover, i have my mammo every year around my birthday in october. well, this year's will be a little early. here's the update. it's a doozy. i called my pcp, who i have to tell you i adore, and was put on hold for a very long time. (the receptionist pays great attention to the person at her desk at the moment, so i knew i wasn't forgotten, just that they were busy.) while i was on hold, i was IMing a work friend about this, and she highly recommended her obgyn. i was not really thrilled with mine, and hers is much closer to my home, so i hung up on my pcp and called them. luckily, someone had just cancelled and they were able to see me within the hour, so i left work and headed on over. i get there, sign in and fill out the new patient paperwork, and realize my blood sugar was feeling low. i'm a type 1 diabetic, fyi. so i tested my blood and i'm just on the cusp of low. and geez louise (not my actual words, censored for public consumption) i didn't have my glucose tablets with me. as a type 1, i am always prepared for anything. why today of all days did this anomaly occur? so, i turned off my insulin pump to stop delivery of any additional insulin and decided to ride it out. that should have been the first sign to me that my sugar was going low... irrational thinking is a big sign for me. so the nurse takes me into the exam room and does a medical history, then has me undress and sends the doctor in. actually, a certified nurse midwife. anyway, to my great embarrassment, not only can't i find the lump now, but i can't even remember which breast it was in! and my blood sugar is now low enough to cause irrationality to set in big time, and so i don't tell her that my sugar is low and i'm not functioning. i just sat there and felt like an idiot. she couldn't find the lump. great first impression on my new practitioner. she gave me a script for a diagnostic mammo, which i am having friday morning, and told me whether they find something or not, if i want she will send me to a specialist after the mammo. i went home, ate, and lay down in bed feeling reallllly bad, and then found the lump again. i can only feel it when i'm lying on my side, and on the table i was lying on my back. oy vey. ANYWAY. i'm feeling better mentally, which is due a LOT to all of your messages and responses. i'm in the office today and feel like i can function, and will update you again after the mammo on friday. i love this forum, i knew someone would reach out to me. hugs to all of you!

thanks. i just don't think i'm going to get any work done today thinking about it. calling my pcp now.

ok, thanks. i'll give him a call.

you think i should go see my pcp instead of waiting until tomorrow to see the obgyn? i have no experience at this.

ugh. my obgyn is on vacation until tomorrow.

i'm sitting at my desk waiting for my doc's office to open so i can call them. i'm totally paralyzed right now. all i can think about is "please don't let this throw off my WLS journey", which i know is just keeping me safe from thinking about anything worse.

i think it's important that you trust your doctor. whether he is trustworthy or not, the important thing is how YOU feel about him. if there's any doubt that you are comfortable with this surgeon, please don't let the thought that changing doctors may push back your surgery date influence you. in the long run, a few months won't make a difference.

my surgeon said i will have a drain that will be removed before i leave the hospital, and that i will be in overnight only.

you are doing very well, and are so close to your goal! you know that the closer you get, the harder it is to lose... that's even with following your food plan perfectly. sit down and look back over your progress, and i bet you'll get all excited again and back on track as you remind yourself how far you've come. don't beat yourself up, what's done is done... focus on now and tomorrow.

i'm going to go tomorrow night. it will be my first one, and i'm about 2 months pre-op now. i'm hoping it'll feel worthwhile, but frankly i don't get as much out of face to face support groups as i do from online ones. this forum is my number one go-to place for support.

don't let the scale unnerve you or throw you off your wonderful path, misty!

Thank you for posting your story.

@@jam, i'm struggling too. i have to do three months pre-op dieting, they want me to lose 10% of my weight (14 lbs). so far i've lost 5 and change, but i'm struggling to keep it going. let's shake ourselves up right now, listen to everyone else's advice, and make this thing happen! are you with me?

remember their motive will most probably be jealousy and envy!

i am thinking of buying Les Mills Body Pump system. it's a set of videos and free weights. i have taken the Les Mills classes for a long time in the gym, and i absolutely love it. it works each group of muscles, to music, hot great music, each song works another muscle group. the free weight set comes with a bar and 2 five lb weights and 2 ten pound weights to put on the bar. i just loved it so much in class, i'm thinking i would enjoy doing it at home because i don't feel like spending the money on the gym membership right now where they do these particular classes (80/month). it's about $200 for the complete set. http://www.beachbody.com/product/fitness_programs/les-mills-pump-workout.do

exciting!

we are reading, misty! keep on writing! and thanks.

of course you're not crazy! speak to your doctor, that's what they're there for and that's why they get all that money! if it's an anxiety attack, you will feel better after speaking to the doc. if it's not, they will help you figure it out. when i became diabetic, i realized that to me, low blood sugar feels a lot like an anxiety attack, so don't feel like you're being a pain if you go to your doctor. let us know how you feel later!

I got the results back from the tests I took Friday and Monday, and everything is good. A little fatty deposit on the liver, which the doc says will go away as I continue to follow my pre-op diet. All I have left now is the endoscopy and the colonoscopy, and two more weighins, the last one in the middle of September, before they will send my paperwork to the insurance company for approval. If you read my last post about all the trouble I had during the testing (I have veins (and arteries, it seems) that are difficult to get blood from ), check out this picture, one week later, of my poor arm. I'm a happy girl today.

First, there are many more risks in staying at an unhealthy weight for the rest of your life than there are with having the surgery, right? That's why you decided to pursue it in the first place. Think about the reasons you started this journey. Second, there are some very good (and scary) threads that I have read here in this forum about complications, and I am happy to say that all the ones I read ended up with the people saying they did not regret the surgery, even though it may have taken them longer (in some cases a LOT longer) to heal. I don't see anything wrong with reading them and keeping yourself as educated as possible. Just make sure you read them to the end, which is usually a happy one. Good luck!

I hated the minimed sensor too... as much as I adore my dexcom! So much more accurate, stays in for a week, so much easier to insert... I would totally recommend giving it a try. My boy cat used to wake me when my sugars were off... I miss him too.