lunasa

terri...we were posting at same time!! Do I get credit for my tennis? LAURAJ....oh girl, you're in for a rollercoaster this year with your wedding plans. Let me just say something to you I wish someone had said to me in my wedding year! Everyone says your wedding is all about the bride & groom...THIS IS DECEPTION!! The day itself when it arrives THAT is your day alright and you can finally relax & enjoy & let everything happen around you. Up until that day, it's all about EVERYONE ELSE!! Everything else you're planning & you're choosing...ie food, drink, wedding party dresses/ suits / hair / make up / menus/ accommodation Time of day etc etc is with your family & guests in mind. You will be stressed, P*d off, resentful at times (when you feel DF or you're family/ his family are not doing their part) You'll feel like calling the whole thing off, running away and taking your girlfriend on the honeymoon at times also.. The thing to remember is THIS IS ALL NORMAL...the planning can drive you off the deep end too!! You won't hear this from a lot of brides because as USUAL with women, we don't want others to know we are not always "ON TOP" of life & the decisions we make. This is also because, once the wedding day comes, you forget all the stress & fighting and the day itself sweeps you & everyone else off your feet and so you all have a ball and remember that it was the best day EVER!! So, go for it...enjoy every minute of thge planning, don't sweat the bumps when they arise...every wedding is STRESSFUL in the planning stage. The day me, dh & my family went to the menu tasting we had all fallen out in a terrible row on the way to the venue (a screaming match actually) ...we tasted the menu in silence (hindsight allows it to be funny now, but it wasn't then) But we got there and it was great. So remember that and you'll do just fine!!

Hello ladies in tights!!! Thank God this is not a skype situation or we might not find it so funny! LOL Anyway, first of all Terri- I got off my Ass last night intending to go walking & asked DH would he come with me, but he didn't want to walk so I suggested he give me a tennis lesson instead (he's a member & quite good) So we went to the court & knocked the balls around for about an hour!! I felt great after it...big red face n all!! I met someone afterwards who thought I was sunburnt!! LOL (poor thing, not so bright, it had been raining all day!!) So, hence my first bit of physical movement since ages!! I'll have another go at something tonight. TracyInks...That's a dilemma you got on your hands there. I would prob say no. I know you cannot protect him from his bio & extended family for life, but for now you can. A young mind will ponder so much more than we can remember doing!! and for him to start confusing issues, identities and picking up on conflict could generate feelings he won't know how to translate and instead he could lodge them and grow insecure in his own little way, not knowing why. Innocence is so precious, and I'd let him have his for as long as you can without loosing your own piece of mind!! No one knows a child like a mother Tracy & you will do what's best for your son no matter what you decide as you will know how & when to handle this. I do know that my own insecurities stem from my childhood, and I was stressing in my own little world, before I even knew what stress and insecurity was!! As children we do try to make sense of the world around us & fit in & be accepted before we have the tools to know why if & how we should. Love is the most important thing for a child, and if you feel he won't get that from the others in question, then that is where your decision could ultimately lie? For now anyway. There is obvious conflict from the email sender in her relationship and as someone above stated, that is a red flag. Also, remember, you are loving yourself now too. So are YOU ready to take this on? What's best for you?? Remember to put yourSELF in this equation too..xx You deserve a priority in consideration too!! I wish you strength, Serenity, courage & wisdom in your decision..xx

Well done JUDY!!! :clap2: Of course we're interested in your drawers!! LOL

Terri...You're right I know..thank you for your advice!!! I won't get pregnant now however, I will wait..just that I decided last year that this would be my pregnency year (I thought I would have gotten hold of the weight prob by now...but time flies when you do nothin about it!! LOL) As for excercise..I promise you I'll walk tonight ok..xx BTW I am a LIBRA...the scales being my zodiac sign...how fitting!! But very fitting also that I tend to tip one way or the other in so many areas in my life, always searching for balance.. I guess this year is my mind body soul balance year!! Jennifur...Babies don't end or mend conflict I agree. I have seen it happen with a friend!! THIS YEAR I WILL BE MY BABY!!! LOL

HORMONES Mdrai!!! As I said I'm just thinking out loud!! The musings of a pre-menstrual woman!! LOL

Hi again everybody... OMG...another 4 pages to read to catch up!! laura..I just visited the annabella website..is it Cedar point or something? If I was on the right site it's beautiful!! I can't believe how excited I am thinking about your upcoming plans!! LOL!! Happy times!! Anyway...I never thought I'd say this but I miss my liquid stage!! I find it harder to deal with mushies & food. I guess it's because I'm back to planning meals & being organised and having more choice!! Plus eating out and eating in company again...I tend to be very unorganised on OFF days...and they're the most important. I still feel I'm doing well, I did have a sneak peak today & am up 3lbs, but I don't record until Monday so we'll see if that will be registered or not, this I expected when moving food stages. (plus I went a bit mad on guinness tues night LOL!!) Drinking like that though wasn't on my plan, I broke my four drinks rule!!! Shouldn't have done that, but for my sins I got shoulder pain back as a result, so there is my lesson & motivation to learn from it!! I did however take extra Bvitamins & omega wed to combat any food cravings I might encounter as a result of the indulgance (TERRI...I think that counts as a back on track tactic?) Usually a hangover sees me eating my way through bread & potato chips & that kinda stuff. THAT didn't happen. SO I am happy that I learnt to deal with an over indulgence positively & not freak out about it & slip following it. I don't think I ever learnt this before, I am very pleased that I can except that I am human and not perfect. I'm not even upset about gaining weight, becuase I know I can cope with it & turn it around...It'll actually be more of a victory to get rid of a 3lb regain than if I had continued to drop the lbs EASILY as I had up til now!!! I don't think I've dropped a regain in 1 1/2 years!! So that will be a victory...stay tuned!! I also haven't started walking yet coz til now I felt too HUGE to do so, that puts me off. But I do have more energy & drive so I think I can face starting to get off my ass now to keep things moving. My next mini goal is to loose those 3lbs to get back down to having reached my first goal of 224lbs...then on to my 2nd goal of-22lbs, I will feel truly into my 2nd goal once I see about four gone into that!! NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT...AND STRANGE!!... I have DISCOVERED a WANT in me to get pregnant!!! (or as they say here "up the pole") Now, this is because I had wanted to start this year anyway, and having decided to have the band, I put it off again until next year. I visited my doc yesterday for my BCP prescription...which I will start anyday now. Some of you are probably thinking...hang on, was she not cotemplating divorce last week? LOL...I'm just sharing my thoughts. I think it's just that in my mind I had planned on having a BUMP by Christmas 2007!! Do you think maybe I'm looking for distraction? Could also be that, not that I'd use motherhood as a distraction, but now that my surgery is over am I looking for the next big thing in my life? I do want to be a mammy soon!! And I know DH would be a great daddy, but Patience I guess, one more year!!

LOLOLO...I meant Pics...not pis!! LMAO

Terri...you Beauty!! How did you get my pis?? I thought I deleted them B4 anyone got a look!! Thank YOu...xx I LOVED our wedding day & all the planning & work that went into it & It was a fairytale..I had Horses & Carriage and fireworks and everything in a castle. I don't have the photographers pics on my computer but if I can I'll transfer so you guys can see us in the picture too!! Laura, the purple was just lighting. We had a friend do the lighting & it was really amazing, it went from purple to blue & he did dry ice for us too, so it was enchanted looking..those photos were taken before he let loose with the dry ice. I'd love to send you the DVD of the day...But the fomat wouldn't work for you there!! I'll see if I can get it re-regionalised (I made that word up) would you like it if I could send it to you? It would be good for ideas..it documents the day from the moment we started getting ready at home until the dancing into the early hours!! The memories make me so happy!!

laura...I know what you mean, but believe me, getting someone to help decorate your venue will take a lot of stress from you. Yes they can be expensive, but wedding venues have to be decorated the night before or day of your wedding...can you imagine yourself up a ladder 24hrs before walking down the aisle? I found my girl at a wedding fair, she had her stall set up with the fairy lights, flowers candles & ivy & I saw it a mile away, it was beautiful. I knew when I saw how she presented her work that she was the one for the job!! The florist was amazing, she adopted my & DH & done an AMAZING job...our whole town was talking about the flowers in the church for weeks!! LOL, you could smell them from out side!! As I said before though weddings in IRELAND are VERY different than those you guys have and a typical wedding goes something like this 1.30pm...Church cermony (I highly reccomend having a choir and pick your own songs & Readings) We're catholic 2.30pm...Everyone goes to the "local" for a drink or two while the wedding party get photos 4-5pm...Everyone arrives at the reception venue for more cocktails & canape's and a general mingle. More Photos 6pm..everyone is called for dinner & when seated the bride & groom are announced & seated last 6-9pm...Dinner & speeches & more drink 9-9.30..everyone gets up to move around while the room is cleared for dancing. 9.30-10pm..The band start & continue until 12.30pm where either another band or a DJ takes over..music til 2am!!! 2am...some people go home but most go to the residents bar and have been known to party until breakfast (this was the case at every wedding I've ever been to!!) Breakfast..A lot of sick people skip this part. And by lunchtime we all meet up again to spend the rest of the day seeing the bride & groom off and curing ourselves with a hair of the dog...this has also been known to last until the following Breakfast time! Our wedding was on a Friday...we partied with everyone until Sunday before flying off into the sunset. Most guests also returned home on the Sunday but our wedding party continued celebrating until the following Wednesday!! I love Weddings!!!

SHIT!!! I knew I'd get it wrong!!! Help!! I posted with photos but they were MASSIVE so I deleted the post.. I'll wait for the instructions for me & Jennifur!! LOL P.s.....yes, LBT is giving me trouble too when I submit post I get server error page and have to go back to LBT homepage!!

:faint: :faint: :faint: OMG!!! Everytime I go missing for a day I have PAGES to catch up on... All up to date now!! Hello Everyone!! Tracy...Lovely Photo...you are glowing with health energy & happiness!! KAT...You are so kind thank you..xx That story about your friends is so sad..OMG. As for us, well after keeping a silent & respective distance for a couple of days we both contemplated on the questions we had of each other & although the silence was TERRIBLE we ended up having a very good chat in the end. We shed some light on things and it turned out to be a very productive bump! We have a very good relationship and we're very affectionate & lucky to have each other but as with all couples there are always areas that are harder for us to communicate in. So we made a breakthrough and are both happier that our one particular problem has been made clearer & we now understand what it was that has been in our way the past AGES!! It really was great to finally get through that. Anyway...((((PAMELA)))) Please remember to be good to yourself during this hard time. My mother lost her mother in FEB this year and it has been very hard on her. It is a very sad time & I see what my Mam is going through and somedays we worry so much because she is so devastated that she seems almost out of it. My nana was her rock. Just know that although those days will happen there is still room for happiness & joy & love in your life and let those who love you provide that for you in their support. We do it for our mam because she is our rock and someday soon please God she will become the nana..The circle of life. Don't hold back Pam, you will survive this and always remember to love yourself everyday too..xx Sara...Good luck with your exams!!! Laura..Wedding plans!!! I put my wedding together myself, I had a scrap book, I filled it with ideas from magazines & planned everything from the bouquet to the menu to the table seating & the accommodation for my 240 guests PLUS the following days' festivities!! (Has anyone ever been to an Irish wedding? they can last anything between 3-7 days!!) I did however hire someone to decorate the reception venue & the church for me. But it was magical & fab & I got so much pleasure out of it!! I'll see if I can post some photos!

Yes Terri...we're living in an atmosphere you could cut with a knife at the moment..I am sad about it...but what can I do? We're only married 2 years and I get scared that we're having difficulty so early in!! I dunno what to do, but I'll see how the rest of today goes

Me ANXIOUS today!!! Haven't much to say but am reading all the posts...great to see so many of you excercising!! Well done..and the fills are coming up too!! I'm due my first for mid June. Anyway...stay strong everyone!

LOL !!! That's funny!! I'm going to see George Michael in June with my girlfriends.. I love him!! Fighting with DH again!! OH NO!! ... Tracyinks...any openings for nuns in that convent of yours?

Michelle... I forgot to say I'm so glad things have turned around for you..xx Laura...I know I prob would have yoyo'ed anyway!! Just the musings of trying to get to the bottom of things over the years!! You're clothes are hanging off..That's Great..and I hope you see the 200's soon!! Must dash...TTFN..xx

Hello everybody!! Teachlady...love the hair do...very interesting!! And I too can see a difference in you now from your avatar pics!! Laura...touching story, and sad. Especially when you see you were only a little girl!! There are a lot of issues & things we didn't know about bubbling to the surface. I said it before about how our unhappiness affects those around us...we will all gain insight at one point on this journey how someone else close to us had a struggle related to our own!! I have too dwelled before on why I got fat growing up and my DS didn't!! I remember being in slimming classes with my mam & her friends at the age of 10 and weight watchers as a teen. Certainly didn't help my self esteem as I was the only kid there and felt embarrassed especially that my piers would find out!! Hence began my yoyo THAT young. I often wonder if I hadn't started dieting that young would my first adult attempt have been successful? Or would I have naturally lost some or most of the fat growing into a young woman! When I was a teen I use to hide & turn around photos that included me in our house, I couldn't stand to look at my confirmation photos especially..That's when I learnt to hate myself..I HATED those photos, they were like my cryptonite, I was utterly repelled by them!! Hence began my lifelong game of dodge with the camera. At one point I would actually be so aggressive towards anyone trying to take my photo it bordered on phobia!!! My GOD...there are not a lot of photos of me very overweight coz I wouldn't allow it. Anytime I lost weight it was different I was happy to join in & pose!! But because of the Confo pics, my fat pics are a rarety in our family collection!! It's a little bit funny though, there are parts of my documented photo life missing..years at a time then I pop up again smiling!!! (for a while) One thing I'm happy about is that for my wedding I was happy with my size & my photo's are beautiful. I can always cherish them...I don't have to deal with being ashamed of them!! THAT would have been an issue for me. So THANK GOD for that!! KITY....oh yeah with the new drawers!! LOL Everyone else.....have a greater day than you had yesterday!!

I thought for a second about lying & saying yes I did make it, but although I'm good, I'm no barefoot contessa!! LOL No I got it at the fish counter in wholefoods, it's talapia. And you only have to bake it for 10mins!! BTW...is wholefoods the most expensive grocery shop on the planet? I'll let you know if it tastes as good as it sounds if I ever get to have it!!

Here's a lovely suggestion for those of you in the breakfast rut Blueberries Peaches (de stoned & cut into wedges) Put them in an ovenproof dish & cover with natural yoghurt Top with demera sugar Bake for 10 mins...or whatever it takes in your oven. TERRI...every time I post I forget to aknowledge you have entered onderland!!! That's SO FABULOUS!!!! Are you the first violet in onderland? Tracyinks...you are very kind to take that new woman under your wing...When you sprinkle kindness, it grows. Any one fancy an affair? Seeing that I'm being suspected of it anyway!! LOL

Morning all!! Firstly Michelle..start today with a moment to begin loving yourself today... close your eyes and imagine yourself as a small child standing alone & scared. Now imagine yourself as you are today giving that child a big hug and taking her fear away. Linger on that image today and see how you feel about yourself throughout the day. See if it makes any difference within...I find this excercise & imagery very powerful. LOL...here's a good one. Last night we're going to bed & DH says "I think you're having an affair!" LOLOLOLOL....of course he knows I'm NOT but he has observed the new DEDICATION in my life!!! My Violet affair!! I just replied ah yeah, if you're not careful I'm gonna run away to lapland with a load of bandits!! Yesterday when I had lunch , I obviously took in too much. I had about a small tin of salmon w mayo, a spoon of guacomole and a little bit of salsa, and I ate too much too fast. Maybe 4tbsp in total? I find that it's hard slowing down mushies as there's not a lot to chew. Anyway I was yappin too much to concentrate. So after I ate I felt VERY full, not stuck or in pain just stuffed...that was at 2.30pm and I stayed that full for the rest of the day!! No dinner!! Today I'll see how I get on having a smaller amt for lunch ( I still do a protein shake for breakfast) so that I can have dinner too. I've a lovely piece of fish stuffed with spinach & feta that I want to have!! SARA MOS>>>>well done!!! You're doin GREAT!!!

(((((MICHELLE)))))) You're going to be just as strong and beautiful as you imagined...don't let that dream fade from your sight. It won't entirely all rest on the band..you are the one who is going to make it happen with or without, and you've already come as far as posting on here, that in itself is changing you..xx It had a positive effect on you today knowing you had us all to lean on. As you said take tonight to cry & be upset and tomorrow is a new day and tomorrow you will learn something new about yourself, that you are strong & beautiful no matter what surprises life carries your way..xx Sweet Dreams darlin...my wishes are for you tonight..xx

Oh (((Mdrai)))...please don't say that about yourself...that's upsetting. This is a totally & unexpected major blow to you...I don't know what to say. I'm glad that thinking of us helped a little. You know we will support you. I'm so sorry to hear this!!! Please Please don't put yourself down like that !!

Goodness... I feel kinda bad for my outburst there a while ago RE Kat sil!! I was outside thinking about it & I thought god I prob am being insensitive!! It just really bothers me to be around or hear about the kinda people who wear their issues so aggressively, with no consideration for the lives around them. That woman is putting her own vanity before her brother's (?) health. I'm sorry if I was a bit strong or offended anyone but I just don't understand why people are willing to let themselves be known as the intolerable pain in the butt rather than deal with their issues, face them & change for the better. My main motivation & problem with my weight is primarily a vanity issue. I hate looking like I do and not being able to dress like I want. It's not that I hate eating everything I feel like, I quite enjoy that. But when I put my vanity aside I see what my unhappiness does to those around me, how they suffer because I'm too busily wrapped up in my pile of s@#t to be the best sister, daughter, friend & wife I can be. Those who love me see my potential and it's frustrating & energy zapping for them to see me waste all that I can be. I think this is why I am feeling so uplifted right now on this particular journey, I have found the motivation I always needed to drag myself out of the cycle that got me here. Because those I love are being shortchanged, and I'm truly grateful to be loved by them & for their patience with me so far. THAT is what has lifted the clouds & that is what drives me now. And THAT is what frustrates me about others in whom I see my former selfishness. I was selectively selfish! Now, I am not only doing this for superficial reasons like clothes size and high heels, I am doing this to reward my family & ultimatley my self and to live a life I can be proud of. I want to be a better friend, wife, sister, daughter and a better me. How can that not be the best gift and to realise I am actually capable of doing this with the one tool I have always had is quite inspiring. That tool is LOVE... pure & simple. I have opened up my heart to give & recieve this very simple but powerful gift, and that will be the difference in my life. I hope to inspire more people to find the love that will change their world. And to reward any love coming your way because, even if everything else is taken from you, you will always have love.

I really don't know why my text shrunk towards the end in that last post..anyway... I haven't update my ticker yet but I lost 2# this week. I'm delighted & surprised as I had prepared myself for a different outcome. This leaves me with 1/2 lb to go to first goal of -24lbs. I received my James Avery charm today & I'm kinda confused as they bracelet & charm arrived in seperate pkging...how do I get the charm onto the bracelet? I really don't want to dend it back in the mail to solder ONE charm on there...and I wanted to wear it now!! Meaners!!! Pain in my shoulder drove me mad on my 2nd flight yesterday...I ended up standing down the back of the plane in tears. The airhostess had been very rude to me in front of other passengers as I couldn't bear to stay seated and then she realised I actually was in pain and lightened up. lucky for her she did, as I was standing by the emergency door and the spawn of satan that was easily accessible within me would have disposed of her very quickly!! Stooopid cow!!! So I made it finally & I'm good again today TG. Going to the mushies page now.

WOAH!!! PHEW....am all caught up with the reading!! As someone pointed out are we going for the longest thread ever? I was just thinking the same thing and wondering if Others are moving like ours when I saw that post! Firstly BRENNERS!!! have been thinking about you, good to hear from you. That's a complete pain in the a#@ about your port but I know it's something that is easily fixed by the doc & I hope you get to move on from there. You sound great though in spite of that, fair play to you for keepin the good side out...xx and well done on the excercise!! Christy...Me the rez councellor...LOL....sometimes I wonder!! I am sorry for your troubles with FIL...that's sad..xx KAT....your post...He (my BIL) needs to lose weight desperately, he has a horrible family health history, and carries it ALL in a HUGE belly (kinda like me!!!!!). I know he will never go for banding, because my SIL has made it an undesirable to everyone, because she throws up everything she eats.......and tells everyone that. I don't know whether to think she just exchanged one eating disorder for another---obesity for bulemia, or whether it is her way of being the only one to lose the weight, which is what her own daughter thinks---it is scary! Just really glad I am not depending only on her for lap band support!!! OHHHH!!!! Attention seeker anyone? I'm sorry but what a selfish and mean person this sounds like!! YES YES YES.... God forbid anyone else around her go under the knife for the band, it just might steal her thunder? Then again she could be in total defense mode and this is her wqy of letting you all know that her decision was not "taking the easy way out" as we all know IT"S NOT. God forbid she finds herself without a struggle to play on? I find that strange that she is being a fly in the ointment when others around her have had the same procedure...is she trying to highlight her struggle as more pressing and sympathy deserving than everyone else? Do some people ever grow up? I feel sorry for these "adult Children!!" I don't know why this bothered me so much Kat!! (I think it reminds me of someone I use to know, and who I never got to slap in the face like I always wanted to & should have) I'm sorry to take issue with a member of your family, but I really don't know how you cope with this & all the kind of behaviour they seem to think they are entitled to...are they SPECIAL in some way? Ohhh, :angry :angry Anyway Kat...I just think you're fantastic. You are so strong & upbeat, with all you're going through with Rick, you are still joyful & you still find the time in you life & in your heart to check in here every day and cheer us & support us & report on you own endeavors I really admire you....You're a great person...xxx EVERYONE else....well done...keep it up...good luck...hang in there...chin up... FIND TIME TODAY TO LOVE YOURSELF IN SOME LITTLE WAY...XXX

Why don't you just do that Jennifur...You are not able for this party. It will lead to upset for you. Call it off, plan something smaller to mark the day. I will wish for you that you get good news this week re the job situation..xx