DeLarla

Or bookmarkers.

You asked for it! I think they're Upstairs Downstairs Arousers from the Renaissance period. We've come a long way, so here's what they look like today. And no, I don't have them in MY nightstand!

You need to thank yourself, girly! Varooom, you rock!

Baby V, I personally KNOW you can do this. You people don't want Michelle getting all the damn chips, do you? Penni, how is everyone adding all that crap (haha, you all know I hate stupid smileys and tickers) to their signature lines? People are coming up with all sorts of crazy stuff, the chips shouldn't be that hard. I'm having delicious Water with freezer burned ice right now. Life is grand!

Nyk, slow and steady is a great way to lose weight. Thirty one pounds isn't anything to snuff off! That's over three huge sacks of potatos. Good job!

I'm extremely proud to be a member here right now. Your loss is astonishing. I am a little concerned with your port though. Make sure to have a good doc keep an eye on it... did they do it under fluoro? That's a good way to poke a tube and spring a leak. But you sound like you have your eating under control, so fill or no fill, you rocked your band. Congrads.

I had earlier posted a picture of something called Upstairs Downstairs Arousers (buzzing clips for the nips) but then I was afraid they'd offend someone. Sorry for bring perversion to this thread, it was supposed to be funny but I deleted it. But Terri, with your permission we could start a whole new chain of fun threads called, "What is it." I like this game.

By the way, be honest with yourselves. Just because I gave up soda doesn't mean I can take up Starbucks, and just because you give up Cheetos doesn't mean you can take up Fritos, for example. I'm drinking garbage can size containers of watered down ice tea. Not much flavor, probably just enough to stain my teeth. We just can't win, can we? So I'll be thin with brown teeth. Nice.

I'm so proud of us. Everyone post daily what day they are on. I changed my Avatar line, but I think Penni is editing her post daily. Keep this updated. Don't give in. We all had surgery to lose weight. Forget about soda, forget about Cheetos. I'm only on Day 4 and my pants are wobbly on me. Keep it up everyone.

NO TEN DAY chips. NO, NO, NO. This isn't Over Eater's Anonymous (I just stole their idea.) This is DeLarla's Boot Camp designed to get some of us off our asses and back from Hell (weight gain) to Reality (Svelt Land.) Have you not seen my ANGRY posts lately? Penni is pretty pissed, too. Nobody is getting off easy around here. Go play in the sandbox if you want a 10 day baby chip. NO TEN DAY CHIPS. Not in my thread. Don't make me eat your head, I'm damn hungry! On a lighter note, Renebean, you did a fabulous job on those chips, and now I really, really want one! I hate ticker tockers, but I want some of Rene's chips! Good luck everyone. GAME ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By the way, I am "loosely considering" Mexico for plastic surgery. It's on my list of potential's, but I'm talking about a major hospital far from TJ with a highly qualified surgeon. I'm not anti-Mexico, I'm just anti-Mexican-surgical-centers that don't have proper equipment - like an ICU unit, for example.

I based my opinion of the Swedish doctor on the fact that he's the first one that started this whole Band thing with the Swedish Band. Sorry, but I haven't researched any Australian doctors. As far as re-use of tools in a vet clinic, that makes me furious. My pets are my children. Thanks for adding that, because I will be sure to insist on all new equipment and supplies if my babies ever need surgery again. I'll pay the extra money. And my overall opinion of my Band has never changed - my band rocks! If I had to do it all again, I would get a list of doctors, then I'd get a list of the facilities they practice in. I would pay twice as much for the insurance of a sterile environment. Trust me, a port infection can really ruin a girl's day, week, month, year, decade!

Furthermore, it is my opinion, based on impressive testimony, that Inamed has been made aware on countless occasions that their product is being installed in facilities that fall way below standards. Awe, who cares when they are making a buttload of money?

Kathy, can you please AMEND? Hahah, but use English for us dummies! "I hope they have an autoclave here...but can rubber tubing be put into an autoclave? A bucket of bleach Water?" What the heck did you say? I also went to Kuri for my port removal. Lovely man, very thorough, and his work and his assistant's stitches were immaculate. However... The table I was on was NOT in a sterile enviroment since there were no doors. People were walking in and out, around and about. Many American nurses fall below par, so I don't believe all the nurses in TJ are careful enough. I was in three different facilites in Mexico, and each one scared me in one way or another. A real Mexican hospital would never allow re-used stockings, let alone re-used tools. It's not always about the surgeon. Choose your facility wisely.

"I paid for a band AND the DOCTOR so I am going to use my band and when it doesn't work right I am going to use my doctor." SAY IT AGAIN, AND SAY IT LOUD!

I'M YELLING AGAIN, BUT IN A GOOD WAY! THANK YOU ALL FOR KEEPING THIS GOING. I'M ON DAY 4. No food in bed, and a no goodies! I couldn't sleep last night due to hunger, so I got up and ate some cheese, which filled my band and put me to sleep like a baby. Not a wad of it, just about 1/2 ounce.

New Information on Port Infections Another long post - grab some coffee. Yesterday I had a long talk with one of the world's top band experts (opined by me, Inamed, and thousands of others.) Names aren't important at this point - it's all common sense. Do not accuse me of spreading rumors or slamming doctors. My telephone reception wasn't the clearest since I was talking to another country, so don't quote my exact words. This source is famous around LBT and other boards for his stellar reputation. Do not ask for names, I'm not here to insult or slam anyone. If you don't like what this says, ignore it, but I'm compelled to share based on what I believe to be truth and fact. Those of us who have had port infections/revisions (red, swollen, infected, warm) have a good chance of eroding within two years of banding. Could be more, could be less, or you could get ultra-lucky. I'm practically counting on erosion (I feel the vibe.) I've decided against a new port, and I'll keep my band till I lose restriction. Loss of restriction is a warning sign of erosion. I'm expecting the worse. Let's hope I'm wrong. No worries, life goes on. Now's the time to focus on gaining control over my eating disorders. "Port infections typically happen during band installation; the doctors in TJ are excellent surgeons, but the 'surgical centers' they work out of are not adequately equipped and can't afford necessary medical equipment." The problem isn't with the surgeon, thank God! The problem is with these "surgical centers" that fall far below the standards of a sterile hospital, which is something we've been suspicious of all along. These laparoscopic tools called a "trochar" (thanks, Kimber) are so expensive that Mexican "surgical centers" (office buildings that have been converted to surgery suites) often re-use expensive surgical tools after sterilizing them. However, you can't get the tools hot enough to properly sterilize them without damaging the tool. If a new tool is not used EACH time, bacteria will harbor. Will harbor, not might harbor. It might take a couple years, but the bacteria will be there, and it will eventually grow. The large Mexican hospitals that are like our sterile US hospitals don't allow re-use of tools. New tools must be used with each surgery, which is why the Band surgery is more expensive in more reputable places. Cutting corners is a way for TJ to offer the Band at a lower price. Again, don't accuse me of spreading rumors because I'm simply relaying information that came from someone that's been placing bands for 15 years and hasn't had an infection in over 1.5 years. I am NOT saying TJ performs with used tools. I'm saying I was told this by an impressive source, and it makes perfect sense since I have firsthand knowledge that a BRAND NEW surgical center in TJ re-uses medical supplies! The white surgical stockings I was given during my port replacement were used. They were clean, but they had snags and worn spots. Another LBT member saw a HYPODERMIC NEEDLE laying on a nurse's station in a different TJ surgical facility. These facilities are NOT sterile. On a side note, he told me that US patients are coming to him. One person has been on antibiotics for her port infection for months (prescribed by a US doctor to kill the infection.) I almost cried for her. Her infection would go away, but every time she stopped the antibiotics it would return. Antibiotics can't kill a port infection. An infected port must be removed. AN INFECTED PORT MUST BE REMOVED. It is my opinion based on 1.5 years of research that port infections begin during band placement from use of non-sterile tools. It is my opinion a top Band surgeon is Swedish, and he uses the Swedish Band. It is my opinion a top Band surgeon is in Italy. It is my opinion a top Band surgeon is in Mexico, but not TJ. It is my opinion Dr. Billy is on his way to being a top Band surgeon (I didn't put him on top yet simply due to the lack of time the Band has been in the US.) It is my opinion that US citizens should avoid Tijuana "surgical centers" at all costs. It is my opinion that you are responsible for asking your surgeon if he uses new tools and surgical supplies. I may edit this thread as the day goes by since my mind works slower these days, but I won't change anything, I'll just add. Okay?

Yesterday I met a woman who lost her 33 year old girlfriend, who died 11 days after a Gastric Bypass. The 33 year old and her husband traveled from Vegas to California to use one of the best doctors around. Both surgeries went without a hitch. However, the woman's legs became swollen, and she ignored the problem. Her mother begged her to go to the emergency room. The girl I met also begged the friend to get medical attention since her legs looked suspiciously swollen. The girl kept saying her legs were always swollen. Everyone begged her, but she decided she'd wait it out. Eleven days later she collapsed, and she died within hours. Unfortunately, I didn't have time to get all the details, but the cause of death was related to some sort of blood clot problem. It killed her. She could have saved her own life if she paid attention to warning signs. SHE DID NOT HAVE TO DIE. I've heard several similar stories of people who ignore symptoms, hoping the problem will go away. Don't ignore problems. Attack them from every angle till you know you're safe. If a doctor suggests diagnostic testing, "just to be on the safe side," then don't wait for a convenient time - get in immediately. Maybe nothing's wrong, but maybe nothing's right, either. Safety first. Period. If you're worried or scared about your upcoming surgery date, good for you! You should be concerned and cautious. Going in with concerns is the best and safest way to a healthy recovery. Listen to your body, watch for anything that seems odd or feels wrong. Never think you are pestering your surgeon. If he doesn't call back, stay on the line, call again, and call the office manager, the nurse. If a doctor only gets one call, he might not think it's urgent. We pay a small fortune for this surgery, so the doctor better tap dance his ass to the phone or give me his number and I'll call! Never avoid calling your surgeon because you think you are pestering him. Read all the posts here by NJChick, for example. She's going to make an excellent patient because she's been participating here and learning as much as possible BEFORE her surgery date. She has valid concerns, but she's going in with knowledge and will know what to expect after surgery. She'll be able to tell the difference between post-surgical discomforts vs. something out of the ordinary that needs to be addressed with her surgeon. Gold stars to her and the rest of you newbies that are here every day acting like a sponge, absorbing vital information. If something really uncomfortable or out of the "norm," get on the horn immediately. Do NOT log into LBT and ask why your wounds are red, swollen or leaking. Do NOT come here if you can't swallow, or if you passed out earlier. Don't come to LBT if your pain is so severe that you can't move. Please don't come here for medical answers because we are not doctors. However, the second you get off the phone with your surgeon, I beg you to PLEASE log in and tell share everything here AFTER you have called your surgeon. If your surgeon isn't available, then you can come here to ask suggestions for other alternatives to finding another surgeon, for example. I'm not trying to scare you; I'm trying to empower you. Go in with ammo. Know what to expect, and you'll be ready for anything. We'll all be here waiting on the banded side with love and support. Good luck to all of you! Oh, and most important, keep a sense of humor. You'll need it!

For anyone afraid of surgery, go see my "Are you Scared of Weight Loss Surgery" thread.

Lapband's own Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. I just can't get over that picture. I wish I kept my largest pants.

Wow, I just came up with a new game. I'll hand out a piece of paper and give all the girls 2 minutes to write down words for girl parts. Prize to the winner! Thanks for the list, ladies! Here it is so far: Giblets Nooner Punani Coochie Hoo-Hoo Cooter Ting Tang Susie Pootie Chachee NooNoo Kitty Poofie Ax Wound Pinky Doorbell Po-Po Gina Felix

I'm not much into the whole Hollywood thing, but I gotta chime in here because you can't help being in their business since they are on the front of every news paper, every magazine, every commercial. I can't get away from them. So here's my 29 cents. IT IS WEIRD. I just get creepy vibes from the whole thing, and I fell so sorry for sweet Katie. I don't even know the girl, but DeLarla's Intuition is screaming, "RUN, FOREST. RUN!" He's creepy. I'm with Penni.

P.S. Vines, while you're on the line, exactly WHEN will you be here to start painting my house? It's dying for color, just like my hair.

What's the opposite of a butt kisser? I don't kiss up to anybody! Except Marty McSorley. I'd kiss up to him. Or Bruce Springstein. Or Bob Segar. Well, I guess there's a few.

I was doing a demo at one of my Slumber Parties last weekend. When I showed the X-Scream, one woman yelled out, "Oh my gosh, I LOVE X-Scream!" Then another girl crossed her legs tightly together and responded with, "FIRE IN THE HOLE!" Good thing I'm using my Ben Wa Balls because 2 months ago I would have peed my pants right in front of all those women. The entire room laughed for 20 minutes. It was a great example though, of how different we all are.