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ooffa511

LAP-BAND Patients
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Everything posted by ooffa511

  1. It's true. I blame his bs the reason why I smoke. He is easier to handle baked and that's when we get a long. I have an idea what our therapist will say tonight and I know all fingers won't be pointed to hubby. Ooffa
  2. It's so tough. My husband is my number one fan and my biggest enemy at the same time I know he is still growing up too. He is 31 and dealing w his own bullshit. But I've been hearing the same excuses time and time again. How do I know that THIS will be the time he changes. It's almost like he has to loose everything before he gets his act together I was feeling strong but now weak and confused. We do have a good therapist and knows us well. We are long time clients but I don't want to waste our sessions on us anymore. I want to be selfish and say f u I need to change for me and me kids. But we are married. Ugh. I feel great that I can vent. Feel bad for my mom and my one girlfriend. Their second jobs are being an ear lol
  3. My husband and I smoke together. Honestly I feel at this point that's the only thing we have in common. Its hidden from the children but it's my way of staying calm. I'm scared to try xanex bc I have such an addictive personality. I am so desperate to stop smoking pot. I quit cigarette 5 months ago. I am really truly trying to turn my life around. But I'm at a hurdle I am Jewish but we are raising our children catholic. I have a modern family life. My kids have the same bday 7 years apart so bday and hoikdays consist of my husband and in laws my fam and my ex w my ex in laws. And we all get along. It's hilarious. Anyway back to the point. I have been through soooo much and turn to g-d but I feel like he keeps taking a **** in living room and walks away and I have to keep cleaning it up ( I hope u get my analogy). I truly feel stuck. I am thankful for everyone u guys are saying bc I feel like I am the only one. And as much as my friends understand they don't I am a passionate person and have a drive for life but it's been gone for years. The sleeve felt like my salvation and now that the weeks are going I am realizing where the change has to happen. I will not end my marriage tonight bc I am head over in heels w my hubby. The damn book 50 shades of grey got us back but it was for the moment. A lot to swallow at once. And I feel a lot of it is self created. Change is tough. Especially when there is a lot of change that has to be done.
  4. These issues have been here for a while. When I finally made the decision to get sleeved it was for me. No one else. But now that life is going on I'm really starting to realize the catalyst to my poor behavior. I don't know how to stop unless the source of my problems are gone. I will keep everyone posted after therapy tonight. I really am trying to take the steps to become the best me. I do deserve it
  5. I know what I need to do but the decision is killing me. I don't want to hurt my little family but I am not being anytime of role model My 10 year daughter who had ADHD is seeing all of this. So I hid in my room so she doesn't see her mom like this. My 3rd old son was in the hospital all weekend bc of a major asthma attack. My husband ruined my 30th bday which was a week and a half ago. The truth is I know he is destroying my life but I feel he will get better. I don't know anymore. But I felt great that I got sleeved but now when all the drama has settled I see what I want and it's not him. Its so scary
  6. I have also spoken to my husband about his flaws. We are going to therapy tonight. The real issue is I want to split up bc he is holding me back. He is my hs sweetheart and we got reunited through myspace years ago. He was the one the got away but now I wish he would go away I am a cancer survivor, I have two children and run my own business. But his bullishly is killing me. My motto for him is a day late dollar short and another excuse. He is a great dad to my daughter and to his son. I do love him, I think but I all I know is he is killing me. I don't want to be divorced twice w two kids but I am a survivor and a hard worker and a good person. But these life decisions are not easy and I feel trapped
  7. Thank u everyone I have great friends and an amazing mom to talk too. I called my doc to increase my anti depressants. But I can't get out of this Funk. Pot seems like my only help. I don't know how to stop. I didn't want to go to NA bc I didn't want to get laughed at having a "pot problem" I started off my 30s feeling great and now I feel worse than ever. However, I am going to take into account everything u guys are saying.
  8. I'm writing here bc I see so many of you pour your hearts out. I had sugary 3 weeks ago. I'm down 28 all together but I feel like crap. I have a stressful life. And now where I used food to cope I now turned back to pot. (marijuana) I found myself falling into old habit and I'm scared I am screwing everything up. I'm snacking on crap. Not being good w meds and staying in my room. I have a small family to Takr care of and I feel like I'm going to snap My husband is very supportive of me but makes incredibly poor decisions. He is my main stress and is trying to work his issues out. But in the meantime I am ready to snap and don't know what to do first. I am on anti depressants too. I hope this makes sense and anyone can help. 
  9. I'm not even 3 weeks out and I'm now all of a sudden starving!! I've had an insane amount of stress though. Is it in my head or am I hungry??
  10. Me too!!!! I was going to rip my skin off lastnight!!!!
  11. I live in long island
  12. Thanx everyone. You made me feel better!! I'm 30 today and feeling fab!!!
  13. Happy birthday!!! It's mine too!! I was sleeved on may 1st. I live in ny so I'm going to the city to the empire state building. I figure no food no worry. Enjoy your day!!!
  14. 11 days out and put on weight????? I don't get this!!!!
  15. I don't know why I am stressing this so much
  16. I bought that today. How many can I have in one day??
  17. Def good to know. Thank u very much for the advice and bday wishes 
  18. It's tough to get everything in at this stage. How often am I allowed the b12?
  19. I went through radiation so I remember but this seems worse..
  20. I'm 10 days post op and I'm sooo weak. I feel I'm doing everything right. Its my bday tomo and I don't even want to get out of bed...
  21. Is it bc we had surgery or change in diet??
  22. I'm 9 days post op. I feel good but every time i bend I have a sharp pain in right side.... Anyone know why? Doc didn't seem phased
  23. I'm 9 days post op and I fit into my jeans right out of the dryer!!! So happy

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