Jennifur

i'm off -- thank you for your power grils still waiting to hear on the job, anxiously. very anxiously. as far as I know they had my paperwork in HR on friday morning and finalizing stuff but I have heard nothing, I'm a wreck, I know it is mine but would like not to be waiting anymore. I'll keep you all posted and Pam, my aunt is still alive. LOL so i guess it is ok

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAURA! Just checking in- yesterday was a day, crazy running, went to dinner with a friend, we had a couple of drinks and got a tattoo, I was trying hard to stay distracted and not go sit with gram - went and kissed her good night... talked to her and came home about midnight - she passed away at 2:30. Today is going to be a crazy day - but i'll check in later. totally blew my weight loss yesterday, back up to 204 from 200 so close, but i'll get it back quick

well ladies, it is 4:40am and I am just getting in, no sleep yesterday then worked holy crap we sold out of pizza dough 3 times, which she makes from scratch, sold out of wings by 5:50 along with a list of other things, came home and my aunt was home with the kids, so I got mom some popcorn and milk and went over. Gram opened her eyes right before I got there, Wide open, they have not been opened at all in over 3 days and then her breathing changes and she had this look of peace, her hands got purple, he legs were rock hard and ice cold all the way up. She was getting dark spots from where her blood was pooling from lack of circulation and mom and I both just started laughing and telling her to go and getting visuals of wonderful memories, just like our wonderful experience on Saturday... and her breathing changed and her hands turned normal color and when I just left her leg was hot, all the way down to her toes! WTF???? LOL I don't know if my family will every know or appreciate what mom and I have been through. I was talking to the nurse on my way out and she said she wouldn't have believed it if she didn't see it herself. She did spike a fever of 102 earlier last night and is gurgling again so maybe the meds she has been getting to make her comfortable are beginning not to work anymore, which we knew was a possibility. She sure is doing it her way. I told her when I was leaving that it was time for her to let go (Again) and that mom really needed to get some rest - she is just so tired, at least i'll get a an hour a night in bed. Maybe that will be what she needs, maybe she is so happy with the 2 of us together she won't let go? I don't know but she's something. I'm going to get an hour nap before I have to get up with the kids. I'll check in when I can thanks all Pam - It really is a very special thing and mom and I will have such memories of my gram, but this will just complete them. Tracyk - hope frank is ok... congrats on the wl! you go girl

I'm still holding 200 this morning... guess considering yesterday that is great. have a nutritionist appt tomorrow morning

Kat, mom requested all that food. LOL Gram is still holding on, but her color has changed, mom called and told me to sleep a bit more, so I did and now i'm getting up after the worst night sleep and 4 hrs, showered and going over. I have never been with anyone before when they actually died. Mom and I bonded last n ight like never before. We laughed, we cried, we talked to my grams sisters, we just crawled in bed with my gram. When her breathing was stopping then starting, mom and I took turns just bursting out laughing and crying. out of no where I remembered things like my gram was communicating with me. We were talking about her services. Then my aunt the control freak came in at 1:30... she objected to everything my mom said and then said she wanted a closed casket because she didn't like wakes... PLEASE - she is a control freak over my mom and I think my gram felt it and like she couldn't leave. Her oxygen bounced up to 88 on her own and her breathing picked up. kind of funny isn't it- it was like her calm state was gone. I swear mom and I at the same time, when we were frantically waiting for my aunt felt someone coming in for my gram. It was such a spirtiual amazing night but I am mentally done. I have to work and if she survives going back Laura - I'm so glad you got your card and hope you have the best birthday. I'm going to take a before of my tattoo, but I think I'm going to get a new one tomorrow with my oldest friend... she is a tattoo virgin.

Pamela, I sent her wings, sweet potatoe fries an 3 bags of kettle chips and 2 diet dr. peppers, all of which were gone in an hour and now... besides me, I'm bringing her chocolate at her request. man... no wonder I was 278 at the beginning of this journey, learning to stress eat from my mom. LOL anyway, gram is way drugged and comfortable now, but we don't think it is going to be long

thank you gals for your prayers. Please pray she goes "home" soon. My aunt who never does anything for anyone even came today and my aunt from LA is on her way and I have to pick her up at midnight. My gram is squirming and moaning, is is just so horrible to watch her like this but I'm so glad I can be there this afternoon with her and for my mom. My mom... well she is a stress eater so I'm getting her wings, sweet potatoe fries and kettle chips. just wanted to check in and thank you all. i'll catch up later

Well, change in plans, my gram has been in a nursing home and is a long sad story but anyway, her lungs are filling up, we have a dnr on her and they are not allowed to do anything to prolong her life, nothing except pain management. Mom is a hospice nurse and she said we need to get over there. It is so sad but would be such a blessing, she has been in such a state... last xmas we were called to come say good bye and here we are over a year later. So we have been praying every day that the lord takes her.

Love you Terry....... you look great... and remember it is harder for numbers to go down the less we weigh. I have been stuck for months too, One day at a time. but I know the feeling about B&A. sometimes when I go on I don't understand why I can't see such a difference in me and get depressed.

GOOOOOOOOOOD Morning gals I'm up for the challange... as my scale read 200 first thing this morning. I have been weighing in when I shower too and i'm usually the same or a little less, on nights I work I am a little bloated first thing in the am. I will be in Onederland tomorrow!!!!! Holy crap, I'm so excited i can't stand it. My lowest in 15 years that I can remember is 198. When I was 19 I got down to 150 and I was in a small everything but hated jeans so don't know... but size 8 skirts. I can't imagine myself 50lbs less, I will be the size of my dd. soooo I WILL CTC Today. going to JCPenney with mom in a bit to get some work clothes for my new job that I will have next week. Everyone looked nice but business casual and Friday is dress down day. Michelle - did you get the capir's. If they work I found the other pair and will get them out to you.

I love the countdown.

Hi gals just checking in. my stomach is still a mess but feeling a bit better. lets see if that was enough to push me into onederland! Laura - I sent it to you with your NY trip in mind to keep you warm. after that... cover it in hair, give it away... I did'nt figure it was that cold there but was thinking about your business trip - so I won't be offended if it works for that and nothing else or doesn't work, just couldn't put it in the box. No final word on the job today so keep sending me the vibes!!! I'm anxious to start working ya'll had a busy day... judy, jump for me. I have not been to the gym in 3 weeks.

Tracyks is amazing.. Michelle, the storm is hitting here too... kids are home which is kind of nice because I don't have to bring ds to work with me, but omg... them alone is generally ok, me in the mix.. YUCK... want some cheese with that wine? DS was just hyperventelating because I was trying to lay down before work and dd would not let him go make his bed. my stomach is getting worse by the minute - tonight is going to suck

Tracyks - March 1, 2007 I was 278 Feb 1, 2008 200.5 I am wearing my favorite fat girl Old Navy sweatshirt which was comphy but fit last year, I'm swimming, but still my fav sweatshirt!. LOL

Laura - I hope you feel better, you haveto get rid of it before you come to NY to freeze you butt off.!!! LOL well, my closet is officially empty - my 3 new jeans and a couple of tops and my old/new dress. I'm going shopping to get some new clothes for my new job tomorrow. Nope they have not called yet, they are torturing me LOL I should have my tax money by the 15th, yipee, going to pay a couple of bills, and buy my plane ticket. I'm nervous about telling new job i need 3 days off. Hope it will be ok. I'll bring my laptop and phone if i have to, i'm gone! well...I think i have a stomach bug, and I'll leave it at that, but omg i feel horrible... my good friend had it last week, i told her to keep it to herself but don't think that worked. Not changing my ticker but 200.5 this am... motivation to stick to the rules this weekend!

OMG you guys are so funny this morning! Can you stand it, where we were last year at this time? and now share tmi with each other all the time, which is just friends talking and not really TMI anymore... LOL Well, just got a call from my guy at the agency - they are finishing up paperwork and wanted to make sure I was interested... I told him how excited I am so I should know today or Monday when my start date is! what a great week, this is my year... oh and the Y is right around the corner so I can workout on my way in or lunch or way home !

Is it May yet?

Hi gals keep the purple power coming for the job, I know it is mine but until he calls me with an offer... ya know. I am really tired tonight - totally sucked at work and i should have been out hours ago, but when someone doesn't do their job and leaves, I get to do thiers and mine, and Thurs I have a ton of my own crap to do Can't wait for that phone call Go Tracyks I love the pic i'm off to slumber land, falling over tired

OMG he emailed me right back! He is checking my references and will advise. yipee!

OMG ... is it May yet? It is so cold here and I want to leave now!. LOL Since I would not have time to mail out a Thank you card (since I'm going to get this job by Monday) I just sent him a thank you email. Not going to waste any time, he told me to take his card and email him if I had any questions, so I'm all over it! did I mention this is my job! Judy, yep, that is right, feel flat to get a straight haircut... but it is a good feeling about crossing your legs. I'm holding out on the diet until Monday, not going to know I can eat real food until superbowl parties are over! I am taking 2 bags of clothes with me today, each going to different friends, different needs. I have 2 more bags of salvation army clothes but only want to make 1 trip, going to go through ds's and dd's clothes this weekend. I have the cutest dress in the entire world. It fits... a little snug and I hope to have it taken in for our trip, but I'm figuring it will be perfect in 3 months! I don't ever remember wearing it where it fit me! ever! well i'm off to deliver clothes and get ds. ttfn

I'm back!!! I will know the beginning of next week but I am the top canidate and he is calling to check my references! THIS JOB IS MINE>>> THIS JOB IS MINE It is a dream job for me, closings, attorneys, zoning, and codes.... it is all about me... my school and work all into one! I just called my references to let them know that they would be getting calls - I'm so very excited! To have me back, new improved and stronger and better than ever!

good morning gals well... Today is the day.... 10am my time, send me purple power.. this job is mine, this job is mine, this job is mine...

Thanks gals for all your good thoughts, I'm home from work, just made a cup of my night time camomile tea - decaf, going to try to relax and pass out. I am so excited that I WILL BE WORKING. I'm not even going to give not getting it any power. Tracyks - no... LOL that guy was pretty open... this is just another one ... WTF? Right? why would people get this crazy impression? I did date a married guy who was separated but as soon as Mrs. moved back and they were working it out I bailed. Isn't there a normal one out there for me?

LOL I just mushed up some chili to take to work, no time for pudding. anyway, have a great evening ladies. I'm off to work!

Haydee I just got a fill, I have been eating pudding with protein powder and puree'd soup for the last 8 days. That is what fills me and is working so I'm sticking with it. Clear liquids for me per my strict surgeon was after surgery only - make sure you get protein... HUGS