mdrai

Ok, so here's my pattern (I think)... When I get to feeling frustrated or like I'm not doing this whole thing well enough (whatever THAT means)... then I store it up 'til I come here and spill my guts to you guys... and I whine & wallow w/in myself for about 1 day (cuz that's all I allow myself)... then I pull myself up by the bootstraps and come up with some plan of action and do it and then, I guess because I'm taking positive steps, I get my head back on straight and voila, I'm the old me again, plugging away. So I'd just like to thank you all for putting up w/my, what, once weekly or every-other week whines and for always, always having a positive word of encouragement/advice/cheer for me... I'm so, so lucky to have you all in my corner! We're all so lucky to have each other! I was successful on staying on liquids yesterday -- yay! Not easy, and had a killer headache last night, but I did it. 3 pro shakes, lots of water, and 2 sugar-free popsicles. Am planning on that again today. I am going to go sign up for the aqua pilates class today! I called & there are still spaces left. For some reason I love the water and feel like I can do exercise better there than on dry land, for now, at least! Too funny, as I hate bathing suits. Oh well! Thanks again, everyone. Have a great day! Jenn: Feel free to join me in liquid land... we can splish splosh together! I know I can't live there forever, I will have to figure out how to live in food land, but I also think a day here and there can't hurt to mix it up a bit!

Very insightful and just what I need to read here at the beginning of my band journey. Best of luck to you & Trink! I look forward to next year's post telling us how you're at -- or beyond! -- goal!

Fantastic, Edie!! What an inspiration!! You've probably done this before on other threads, but would you please share a typical day's menu or list of foods/amounts you eat regularly + your exercise plan + any other tips you may have for those of us just beginning our band journey?? I *really* want to be able to write a post like this next year!! Thank you!!

Hi Violets! Long time, no post! Sorry! Here's the scoop: I feel like I'm a failure! There, I said it! And when I feel that way, I stay away from the board & reading about everyone else who's doing great. I realize that that is the exact opposite of what I should be doing... when I'm down I need the board even more! And yet that is what I do. I'm a nut! Why do I feel like a failure? Because I can -- and DO -- eat ANYTHING! True, most of the time it is about 1/2 of what I would've eaten previously, but still... not good. Too much. I have gained back 7 lbs, up from 288 to 295. I can gulp, don't have to chew, can eat bread/grains, you name it. Only one food item has given me the "lump in my chest" feeling, and that was Chinese chicken w/pork fried rice, so I don't know if it was the chix or the rice. It wasn't painful but I did stop eating at that point. I go for my 3-wk follow-up w/my doc on Friday. I hope to schedule my first fill. I have an appointment w/my nutritionist next Weds. I REALLY need to see her! Otherwise, I'm trying to "diet" and it's not going well. I am frustrated and cranky -- always a lovely combination. I am doing one thing right -- I am walking every day! This a.m. a friend called me to walk together (she's a skinnie minnie & very fit) and she kicked my butt! We walked 2x as far as I usually do, at a faster pace. But I kept up! So now I know I can do the longer route, and I'll do it on my own. So that is my one good thing. I'm also going to take a summer Y class, but don't know which one. Any opinions? The choices are: Adult Jazz & Hip Hop class 1x/wk; "Go/Lo" class, which is a lo-impact class1x/wk; or Aqua Pilates; or water exercise. <shrug> I am (trying... & so far succeeding) to stick to a liquid diet plan today - Fri to try to jumpstart some loss for Friday's doc visit. I know, I'm Debbie Downer. Sorry!

Maybe the planets are aligned or something, Tracy!

Good morning, Violets~~ Today is the last day of school for the kidd-os! Guess summer is officially here! I am not doing so well... I am up 5 lbs since surgery... it's driving me crazy! It seems that if I put one thing, be it little or big, "good" or "bad", I gain a lb. I have been walking this week, and am checking out some classes at the Y for the summer... but c'mon! This is NOT the right direction to be going in! I am trying my best to just focus on eating properly, moving more, and the scale be dam*ed... but it's not easy w/those "voices" in my head... "Poor poor pitiful me"

Who, me? <looks around> How do I stay motivated about my decision? Well, to begin with there was absolutely no way I was going to be sliced & diced, so bypass was never an option for me. I'd have been a jolly fat lady if that had been my only option. As for the band, I lost 8 lbs prior to starting the 2-week liquid pre-op diet; the other 21 came off during the 2 weeks pre-op & the first 1.5 weeks post-op. The past .5 week (I'm 2 weeks post-op now) I have been struggling, honestly. The swelling is down; I'm hungry; and, apparently, I can eat almost anything, don't have to take small bites, and don't have to chew/take a long time. I've been having a mini pity party/freak out the past couple days but then last night it hit me that this is what they call "bandster hell". I think it's only my body's natural response, to finally have food again, even tho they're (mostly) mushy... to gain a few lbs. + to take some time to adjust itself after the rapid losses of the past month or so. So now the work begins... between now & my first fill, which I think will be a few more weeks. Nobody ever told me this was a magic bullet. And I didn't want to lose it all so fast that I looked grey & haggard like those bypass people. I went into this knowing that it would be a 1-2 lb/week loss by eating less AND exercising. I just wanted that built-in "helper" for when I couldn't control my portions/volume/speed... it would do it for me. Well, as I'm not filled yet, I don't have that yet, so I need to work at it for awhile longer. So today I re-committed myself to, well, myself with the following: *Remember that this is a MAJOR learning process... it's not about just the food, but also finally, once and for all learning new behaviors and developing a new relationship w/food. Use this time for that. *Walk every morning at the park. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p> *Write down everything I eat + track all nutritional values. *Post a list on the 'frig w/what I can eat & how much -- if it's not on the list, I don't eat it! *Eat the bandster way: Protein first, veggie carbs second; small bites; chew 30 times; pause between bites; 20-30 min meals. *Drink Water, water, water as my main liquid. *Stay off the scale. Weigh just once each week.<o:p></o:p> I think having a positive attitude, exercising, and remembering that this isn't a quick-fix but a longer-term (a year or two?) process helps, as well. Hope this helps!!

Oh my goodness, girls... we were on the 2nd page! I've never seen us off the 1st before! Where is everyone? Off being busy in RL??? That just won't do! Maybe we're all exercising!? Or chewing slowly!? Well, here's a bump, which I really think is the first one for this thread ever! :faint:

Talk w/your doc. Get another fill. It can take a few fills before you get to your "sweet spot". Good luck!

Tracy...

Happy Birthday, Terry!!! And a lovely gift from the scale, too! Yay! Enjoy your girlfriend trip!!! Tracy! A perm????? Yikes! That is one of my very few "life lessons to remember": NO PERMS. NEVER. EVER. It's one of those things that after years go by and I think to myself, "hmmm, I wonder if I should try a LOOSE perm... I'm sure the process has improved since my perm fiascos of the past..." that I shout to myself "NO, NO, NO!" Just NO. Never. Ever. But good luck to you! TAKE PICS! Glad you're feeling fine, Pam! Ok... my whining re: bandster hell is over. I hate it when I whine. It's not like I"m the only one who's ever had to go through this. So, here's the plan: *Remember that this is a MAJOR learning process... it's not about just the food, but also finally, once and for all learning new behaviors and developing a new relationship w/food. Use this time for that. *Walk every morning at the local park. (Doesn't sound like much but believe me it is a MAJOR milestone for me!) *Write down everything I eat + track all nutritional values. *Post a list on the 'frig w/what I can eat & how much -- if it's not on the list, I don't eat it! *Eat the bandster way: protein first, veggie carbs second; small bites; chew 30 times; pause between bites; 20-30 min meals. *Drink water, water, water as my main liquid. *Stay off the scale. Weigh just once each week. Anything else you can think of that I should add??

I guess I'm a club member, too! Banded 2 weeks ago... now hungry & able to eat lettuce, thin crust pizza, grilled chicken... ugh! The scale is beginning to go the wrong way again! It's amazing how quickly the old thoughts/fears/dialogues come flooding back about what a loser I am that I can't even do the band right! Sheesh! So... I decided to STOP all that TODAY! I need to remember that this is a MAJOR learning process... it's not about just the food, but also finally, once and for all learning new behaviors and developing a new relationship w/food. I think that THIS is what this time between surgery & fill is for. The following are the positive actions I am taking NOW: *I started walking every morning at the local park. Doesn't sound like much but believe me it is a MAJOR milestone for me! *I am writing down everything I eat + tracking all nutritional values. *I have posted a list on the 'frig w/what I can eat & how much -- if it's not on the list, I'm not eating it! *I am eating the bandster way: Protein first, veggie carbs second; small bites; chew 30 times; pause between bites; 20-30 min meals. *I am drinking Water, water, water as my main liquid. *Stay off the scale. Weigh just once each week. Good luck to everyone!

Kat -- my good thoughts & prayers for you & Rick today! ((hugs)) Jennifur -- you're right... this is your week! Great things are happening for you, you "perfect lapband patient!" Pam -- sounds like you had a great day... hope your head's ok when you awake! I think I pulled something during the night last night... I remember trying to roll over and going "ow!"... this a.m. my right side near where I think something is in there ( my port?) hurts... inside... weird... Make it a great day, everyone!

yeah, yeah... I heard most of you whining... but somehow it seemed like longer between band & hell... I guess it's all in the perspective, huh? I haven't tried an actual hamburger yet. Not supposed to eat red meat for another 4 weeks -- bwah ha ha ha ha ha! Remember that I'm a month or more behind all of you... so just beginning the "whining" stage, I guess... great -- not!

Why did I think it would take longer to get to hell??? Waah waah. I know I am a big baby. I really feel like I've used up all my willpower between the 2 weeks pre-op liquid diet and the 2-weeks post-op liquid and I was so excited to add simply mushies and I feel like I've just blown them by... so my reality is that I've got to pull some more iron willpower out of my a$$ for 3 or so more weeks... is that it?? <stomping my foot like a 3-yr-old!> Breathe in... breathe out... ok... I guess I just need to get my head around this new, yucky reality and suck it up and grit my teeth and do what needs to be done. Man oh man oh man oh man... I thought the band would at least "help" a little! Sheesh! Wow I am cranky!!!

You guys... I need help/advice please... from all my violets... Today I am 2 weeks out from surgery... feel great... no problems... EXCEPT -- I CAN EAT ANYTHING! And I mean, anything. And a lot of it. And big bites. And fast. Waah Waah Wahh! I swear I don't even feel like I have a band in there! I guess this is "bandster hell"?? Struggled to stay on mushies all day today (really struggled)... then tonight, through a "series of unfortunate events", we ended up at our local pizza joint for dinner... so I got a grilled chix salad... and ate the WHOLE THING. No probs. Felt like I could've eaten more! What to do?? Scale is going up. Mood is going d-o-w-n. I'm having those "OMG -- this is not going to work for me!" scary thoughts! Can you guys share your daily menus? recipes? tricks? I swear, I read what Teach eats and I think I'd starve on that little -- the "guts" of 1/2 of a wrap? Is that what it's supposed to be like? Eat that & be "satisfied"?? I want that!! Does that come w/the fills?? Waah waah wahh............................

Wow! What energy on here! You go girls! I am so impressed!! Good luck today, Jennifur!!! 4:30am?? Yikes, Tracy! Laura, SO sorry to hear about your house! What a shame. There's no way around that one... it just sux! The scale is just creep, creep, creeping up in the wrong direction for me... I know it's cuz' of these mushies... I kept telling dh that the minute I put any food in my mouth I'd gain 10 lbs... I thought I was joking... sort of... bleh... soooooooo... in the true Violet tradition... I think that the time has come... to start... EXERCISING! There! I said it! Have I ever mentioned before that I am NOT an exerciser?? Oh dear. Well, let's amend that to say, until NOW I haven't been. So I will start by committing to walking at the park EVERY DAY this week. There. That shouldn't kill me! (lol!) I did get a bit of exercise yesterday -- I had to stop by the elementary school to pick up something for PTA & there was a "wild animal" from the petting zoo across the street running around on the playground! From our vantage point it looked like a lemur or an anteater (not their lion, happily!)... so the cafeteria lady & I go out there to check it out & also keep an eye on it so that when the owners got there they knew where it was... it went over the fence into the neighboring farm's raspberry bushes... and stayed in there, luckily... so about 20 mins later the owners get there and the chase is on! They're trying to catch him in this big net & he's running away right at us and we're waving our arms to shoo him back toward them... too bad no one had a videocamera rolling! They finally got him & put him in a big dog carrier.... well, it turned out to be an animal I'd never heard of... a coatimundi... a large, racoon-like animal from S. America... interesting! See, sometimes you just don't know where the day will take you! Enjoy wherever your days take you today, Violets!

Thank you, Denise! I am a complete computer idiot, so I don't understand why on some people's screens it would look fine, and on others (like mine) it would make everything stretch out... but whatever you did, worked, so thank you! Scale was UP today... first time in a month... I think it's to be expected as I am adding "real" food back into the mix... but wow those old feelings of failure come flooding back!... much more mental work to be done... + now learning good food choices, etc... the fun just never ends, huh? As much as I am sick & tired of the liquid phase, it has been easy as far as choices & weight dropping off... now the real work begins, I guess! Lunasa... where are you????? Everyone have a great day!

<p>Such a long day today... we left @ 12:30 for ds's "travel" soccer game and TRAVEL is the key word as we just got home @ 9:30pm! We were in the car 5+ hours for the game + dinner.</p> <p> </p> <p>Which brings me to today's eating... OMG!... the team stopped @ Pizza Hut (disclaimer: I hate, hate, hate, hate Pizza Hut & always have... they always screw up the order, they are always dirty & nasty, I could go on, but you get the drift... ) for dinner... so obviously I had limited choices... I know I should have planned for this in advance, but really didn't realize how far we were going today!... so I had 1/2 plate of salad & 1 (only 1 -- what a miracle!) slice of THIN crust (never had that before) cheese pizza. I took itty, bitty bites of everything & ate really slowly... it all went down fine (again, this bothers me)... I felt satisfied but not full... of course, my brain started to go crazy! :" GIVE ME MORE SALAD! GIVE ME MORE PIZZA!" But I was ok! Is this what it feels like to eat like a "normal" person???</p> <p> </p> <p>Tomorrow I will go back to my "mushie" stage... Hope I haven't knocked anything out of whack w/today's menu... doesn't feel like it tho... feels fine...</p> <p> </p> <p>G'nite everyone!</p> <p> </p> <p>PS -- Denise... would you please be able to adjust your siggy so that your ticker & your signature block are on separate lines so that the text doesn't roll off the page? It would make everything easier & quicker to read. Thanks! <img src="http://www.LapBandTalk.com/images/smilies/happy.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" smilieid="60" class="inlineimg" /></p> Edited to add: Prayers for you & Rick!

Ok, I know that this is going to sound gross at first, but... a spoonful of dill pickle juice! It is a clear liquid. It is salty. It tastes just like a dill pickle. Oh, an extra added bonus -- it grosses out the kids! Enjoy!

Good Saturday Afternoon, My Sweet Violets!~~ Busy couple of days... am home for awhile now. Yay. True confessions: I am supposed to be on liquids 'til Tuesday, then move to mushies for 2 weeks, then chicken, then red meat... but I have been soooooo hungry & my stomach growls like CRAZY... so I started eating 1 mushie a day (usually mid-day) to tide me through... for example, the first day I had that egg moosh, then yesterday I had 1/2 c of broc/cheese soup (mixed smooth in the cuisinart), & today, omg!, I actually ate a few cooked plaintains (omg so good & so mushie) + a few bites of the meat of a cuban sandwhich + a couple bites of fresh-baked, crispy cuban bread. Everything's gone down fine (which does worry me in a way... is that band even in there??) and right now, after the cuban stuff (really oh so little of it in actuality, my dd who is 8 ate a whole sandwich, for comparison) I feel SATISFIED (not full, not stuffed!). I've purchased other mushy foods, such as hummus, low-fat ricotta cheese, 60 cal puddings, yogurt, etc... Do you think this is ok to do? Also, do you have any other mushie suggestions / recipes for me? Re: weight... I've actually slowed down (maybe it's the mushies??)... only -1 so far this week... I purchased some Fibersure yesterday but haven't started using it yet... pooping only 2x/wk is not lovely... I also am aware that, having lost 29 lbs in basically a month, my bod may be adjusting itself in other ways, etc., as far as losing lbs goes. And no, I didn't take my measurements (i never do for some reason)... Terry, hang in there girlie... I know I have those old scripts / demons / fears lurking just below the surface as well... it doesn't take much to stir them up, does it? But we must keep in mind that we HAVE done SOMETHING DIFFERENT this time -- this is NOTHING like all the previous times we've tried to lose weight... and it's MORE this time... it really IS a LIFESTYLE CHANGE... the band is ALWAYS with us... which is why I got it!... for the times when the devil-voice in my head wins over my willpower and I WANT to overindulge in volume or food choice... well, now I CAN'T... and if I do, I WILL regret it! + Your exercising is great & making changes to your bod as well. THAT STUPID SCALE! IT IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL! And yet we love it so... Have a great weekend everyone!!! PS -- Maybe we can make really scary scarecrows w/all our oversized granny panties! :girl_hug:

Good vibes going out for your job search today, Jenn! Pam! -- My b'day is 7/8! A busy day planned for today... I'm feeling good but hungry... last night after literally sucking on a couple McD's fries, then spitting them into the trash (the salt was so good... I think I'm missing salty/sour tastes as all the pro shakes are sweet) I decided not to be stupid but smart (there's an idea!) so I made what my kids called "Egg Moosh"... 1 hb egg + 1 T lt mayo + 1 T yellow mustard in the cuisinart 'til, well, mooshy. It made about 1/2 c and I took 1/2 hr to eat it... who knew that'd be "gourmet"?? Have a great day, everyone!

Fantastic pictures -- I can definitely see a difference! Yay Laura -- 'twas meant to be! I've heard that the Wynn is gorgeous! You never know... maybe we Violets will surprise you there!

Laura... FYI it was on the news that the 7-7-07 date is VERY POPULAR for weddings this year (lucky triple 7s)... probably even more so in Vegas... I don't mean to be a downer, but did want to give you a heads' up!

((Lunasa))... I second what Pam said... this thread is such a special safe place for me & you & all of us... it's so much more than just a bunch of anonymous people... I truly care for each of you and think about you, worry about you, celebrate with you... unless I'm a complete nutter (which may well be the case), I think we all feel that way to some degree. Do not feel as though you must only be "on" with us... "positive"... "happy"... we're all here in all our human diversity... happy one day, scraping the bottom of the barrel the next. We all "know" the band isn't "magic," but I think we often wish it were.... so when old "diet" feelings, behaviors pop up, we freak out! We still have A LOT of learning to do... about ourselves, our bands, our "new" lives... and happily we can do it here, together. I don't think this new journey is going to go in a straight line... wish it would, but doubt it will. You've done amazing so far and will continue to do so! I think that your fill will do wonders for your hunger & mood... even just 1 week out I'm hungry... really, bona fide hungry! I don't even want to think how I'll be @ 5-6 weeks out waiting for my fill! Be gentle with yourself, dear friend.