kamrie37

Well I'm not up to that fabulous point...and never will be...so there! :tongue2:
P.S. Quite disturbing that everyone relates. I'm keeping my hair...keeping it I tell you!! (Let the "good luck with that"s begin!)

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Missed last week - hit initial goal of 210 today!!! So looks like I've averaged more than 2# per week recently! Woo-hoo
Going to set new goal at 199 (11# in 3 weeks)

LOL i laughed hard at the "blaming the cat for shedding" statement. I wonder if I could get by with that?! lmao thanks for sharing! this made a wonderful end to a crappy day

So many relatable things. Some I hope not to (like the boobs examples).

My hair was thin before but not too too bad, see more scalp than I'd like for sure. I was really worried when mine started really shedding pretty bad about 3 months out. Now I just made 6 months and it basically stopped falling out over night! Needless to say I'm greatful! I have been taking Biotin and prenatal Vitamins since 3 months BEFORE I had surgery also who knows if it helped or not...I could be way thinner by now I guess.

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

‎"Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted in one
moment would you capture it or just let it slip?" - Eminem
Don't let your opportunity slip away! Is surgery scary? Yes. Could there be complications? Yes.
But look at your quality of life now. You wouldn't be looking into surgery if you were at a healthy
weight. If the good outweighs the bad, go for it!

‎"Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted in one
moment would you capture it or just let it slip?" - Eminem
Don't let your opportunity slip away! Is surgery scary? Yes. Could there be complications? Yes.
But look at your quality of life now. You wouldn't be looking into surgery if you were at a healthy
weight. If the good outweighs the bad, go for it!

‎"Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted in one
moment would you capture it or just let it slip?" - Eminem
Don't let your opportunity slip away! Is surgery scary? Yes. Could there be complications? Yes.
But look at your quality of life now. You wouldn't be looking into surgery if you were at a healthy
weight. If the good outweighs the bad, go for it!

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Read this and thought I would share.
You know you are a Gastric Surgery Patient When…
ü I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
ü You have baby food in the house and no baby.
ü "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
ü All of your silverware says Gerber.
ü A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
ü "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
ü New clothes fall off in a week.
ü You get excited ab
out hand me downs.
ü The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
ü Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
ü "Just Water for me please".
ü Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
ü You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
ü When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
ü When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
ü When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
ü Other women are calling you names behind your back.
ü When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
ü When you really don't have a thing to wear.
ü You have to prove you are the person on the driver’s license.
ü You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
ü You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
ü You are never parted from a bottle of water
ü When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
ü Being too small for your britches.
ü When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
ü When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
ü When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
ü You truly are a "cheap date".
ü When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
ü When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
ü You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
ü Vitamins feel like a meal.
ü You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
ü You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair? "
ü You can cross your legs... both of them
ü Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
ü When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
ü They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
ü No more Velcro shoes
ü Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.< /span>
ü "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
ü When your Stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
ü Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
`ü When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
ü Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
ü You can wear corduroy pants without igniting a fire
ü When you wave and your upper arms wave back
ü You safety pin your underwear
ü Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
ü Cannot blame the cat for shedding
ü Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
ü 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
ü The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god...did he die???
--Author(s) unknown

Absolutely priceless!!

I have their credit card and looks like I'll be canceling it soon! In 14s now.

No more shopping at lane "giant". Cannot wait for that. Seriously. I just want to shop in the normal section for once. And have it be for me instead of for a gift for someone I know.