Leaderboard

Man, if I had a dollar for every critic who said this to me on these boards. It's a past time of a certain type of dieter....to send me hate mail and try to shame me for being outspoken. "You're still overweight! You shouldn't be telling people what to do! How dare you not feel ashamed at that weight!" Shakin my head over here. If I wanted to be 140, I could be. Have been. Looked god-awful and felt like I was starving all the time. If I wanted to be 160, I could be. Have been. I wasn't particularly hungry, got a reasonable number of calories, but thought I looked older. I like a little more round to my angles. I like less sag, fewer wrinkles. Not real interested in cosmetic surgery. Picked the best option for me. I like eating 1600 calories a day. I like having space in my diet for a couple pieces of fruit because I think phytonutrients are beneficial and important. I like how i feel eating a high fiber diet. I like room to be a vegetarian some days. I like flexability. It's how I can face this as a lifelong change. It's how I can make peace with food forever....cause I know this plan is WORKABLE in pretty much all situations. I can eat on my plan during a holiday, a funeral, a birthday party....during a power outage, while recovering from an injury, during extreme emotional stress, on the road, and while dealing with my inlaws. LOL. I typically weigh 165-170 pounds. I LOVE this weight. It is NOT "the best I could do because I couldn't get to a "healthy weight" ", it is an intentionally chosen set point. It's a choice. This is, I am 100% certain...the MOST healthy weight I can choose for myself. That whole...Arnold Schwarzenegger's BMI was technically Obese when he won Mr. Universe figures in. BMI is flawed. It doesn't differentiate between light muscle frames and heavy muscle frames, bigger bones, smaller bones. Different ethnicities. Different body styles. My feet, depending on the manufacturer are size 10 or 11. My shoulders are more broad than most men's my height. My butt, thighs and calves are overdeveloped because I rode huntseat and jumped horses for decades, even when I was quite heavy. My husband says they have a kinda superhero quality now. LOLOLOLOL So here's the thing....If you feel inclined to send me a snarky note about how I shouldn't say anything....because I'm not American Media model skinny, you might have a problem. As it happens, I have a good friend who models. He's 5' 10", weighs 157 pounds soaking wet, and they STILL wanted him to use coke for a week and fast...to look more sickly skinny for his last national ad campaign. Our impression of body image in the media is grossly distorted and unhealthy. And a lot of folks here....get a grossly distorted and unhealthy obsession with their eating habits, their BMI, the number on the scale, and how it defines them. Please, please, please remember....health. Physical health, strength, endurance, good labs, fewer medications. Emotional health...loving yourself, enjoying your life, feeling challenged and happy. Mental health...finding balance you can live with for a lifetime. Love your strong healthy body. Love your good food choices that provide good nutrition to nurture that body. Love the flexability to make it work though the tough spots. Avoid the fixations, the extremes, the inflexable rules, the disordered eating (and disordered not-eating) You can trust yourself to get to where you need to be....without punishment. Love yourself. Love yourself. Love yourself.

Yep. They did. Inceasant hunger can make people angry and filterless, apparently. I honestly am not particularly angry with them, and it's nothing new, and it doesn't just happen to me. When something like this happens....I think to myself....thank God it's you who is a hot mess today, and not me for a change. LOL. Meh, we all take a turn being the hot mess. I'm not taking it personally cause I don't think anyone LIKES to be hurtful to strangers. I think it's a byproduct of rigid thinking...crime and punishment. Rules that must never be broken. A way to feel in control against a foe that one feels helpless against. And I get that struggle. I really do. (only, I don't feel helpless against obesity anymore, or particularly threatened by it. I used to.) And I'm a known food criminal, ya know? I eat carbs. 😳 LOL🤣 How could I possibly eat BREAD and have an imperfect BMI and still feel like a total success? I mean...that's some gall there....

I liked the one I saw, but she just asked me a bunch of questions and focused on how I "sometimes skip breakfast". Well, I do that about 4 times a year when I visit my ex because we sleep till lunchtime! She never asked me how often or under what circumstances! It's just in my permanent file now lol. But I would rather have a great surgeon cut my stomach out and a mediocre dietician than a fabulous dietician tell me things I can look up online and a mediocre surgeon operating on me!! If they're part of a package, take the better surgeon, If the surgeons are both good, go with convenience, because you don't want to have excuses to miss follow up appointments.

I needed every minute of the 6 month diet to do the work of understanding my eating habits and what I was in for....and I still could have used more time to prepare. I understand being excited and impatient to move forward...but the six month diet is important. Without learning to control your eating habits, you're going to be in trouble. This surgery is a tool, and it's a tool that fails...a lot...when people are not prepared for the lifetime changes they need to make. And I don't mean just adjusting to your new anatomy...that's relatively easy. What I mean is...the fact that you will STILL have to count calories, record everything you eat, fight temptation and cravings, and especially... find other outlets for emotional eating, identify your triggers, cope with the things that drove you to eat. Most of the people who make noise on the boards fall into two catagories. The people who have experienced some degree of success working very very hard. And the people who have experienced some degree of success by the good fortune of an excellent physiological reaction to the surgery regardless of their habits (luck). Who we DON'T tend to hear from, or see posts from....are the majority of people who have these surgeries.... who never lose more than 50% of their excess weight. When people get unhappy or feel unsuccessful...they don't post about it. Half of people who have this surgery will fall in this category. You can eat around an altered stomach and gain it all back. It's not even hard to do. The surgery changes one anatomical element to give you an advantage....not a fix. Your head is the place that needs the real fix. Six months...is a great investment in working to fix your head before you have to deal with your new digestive system. Are bariatric surgeries a terrific tool? Yes. The new anatomy helps a lot. Another terrific tool...one that is arguably just as helpful and arguably more important to your longterm success......a bariatric therapist. Make sure you have access to one. Best wishes to all!

OMG...this is hysterical. blackcats...you're killin me! LOLOLOLOL

Looks like we have same stats and I totally get it. When my weight is 165-170 I dont have as many wrinkles on my arms and face. I staying right at 158 ish and can tell the difference in those 10 lbs when it comes to skin and wrinkles being worse. I wear size 8 to 10 depending on the brand and you are right those BMI calculators are not one size fits all. My bariactric team says that even though I may be a 25 BMI you have to figure in the extra skin considering I lost over 150 lbs.

@tabba29 You can do it!

Best advice I've heard came from a bariatric surgeon: "You/we don't know your goal weight yet; you won't choose your goal weight- it will choose you and you'll know it when you find it. " I'm 183 today & have more to lose but I literally could not be the 119 I was in high school now. At this weight I'm a size 12, sometimes a 10 & a L legging, sometimes a medium. I'd look sickly at 119 today. Everyone needs to live in their bodies, not just display them so what society says "looks good" & what's healthy are not the same thing. Lots of love and empowering vibes to everyone 💜

Tell him he’s been”cheating” when he uses the microwave instead of cooking over a fire, taking medicine for a headache instead of picking and brewing herbs, or driving a car instead of walking. 🙄 why is it cheating to take advantage of medical advancements which allow us to live healthier, happier lives? Best of luck to you, Orinskye!

I didn't tell anyone other than my husband. I just didn't want to deal with judgment, gossip, etc, and I definitely didn't need people giving me advice. I haven't been in my office in over a year due to Covid, and look forward to surprising everyone someday! I contemplated cutting and coloring my hair to really freak them out! LOL!! I did tell my mom about my PS, which was more of a test than anything, to see if she tells anyone. She's horrible with keeping secrets! I don't care if word of my PS gets out, b/c it's pretty obvious to anyone that sees me in a bikini anyway. I'll be curious to see how long it takes her to tell my secret though! LOL!!