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Journal of changing my life

Entries in this blog

 

December 3, 2014 - I'm starving to DEATH! 11 more days!

Day 3 of my pre-op diet. I am counting down the days!   I think I am starving to death...I know most of this is in my head, but yesterday I felt bad. Had a gnawing in my stomach that reached into my chest. I had 3 protein drinks and 3 oz. of ham and some raw carrots. I miss my carbs!   Last night I went to bed and was putting vicks on my lips and said to myself...man that taste good. I'm nuts...vicks vapor rub does not taste good. But woke this morning feeling better. I got my coffee and a Icky protein drink and seem to be making it okay today so far. The nutritionist at my pre-op class said the 3rd day is the hardest...but yesterday was tough for me.   Today I am going to make myself some turkey soup using broth and adding in some onions and carrots for flavor. Hopefully that will fill me up more and satisfy me. Not in the mood to drink protein drinks (cause they are icky to me) but I will! I ordered myself some Isopure drinks and hopefully I will like those better. I do believe it might be the fact that they are milky. Never been a milk person.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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December 1, 2014 - Day 1 of the Pre-Op Diet

Russell and I got to Dr. Provost office right on time. It is such a long drive. The class was very informative and I think I got it all down. I'm am on a liquid diet (with one meal each day). It has to be within their guidelines, and basically that means 3 oz of lean meat with 2 cups of uncooked (1 cup cooked) veggies. But at least I get to have one meal each day. Not sure if I like the Atkins protein shakes. I bought the mocha ones and they aren't bad. I think I will experiment with those and add ice to them and drink them for lunch. Sort of make myself a fake Starbucks latte!   Best thing is I learned I can keep drinking my crystal light ice tea and have my coffee in the mornings. I like my coffee!   I'm gonna clean out my refrigerator just to help keep me from even thinking of cheating. My head whirls with things all the time. Just knowing that I am on this diet, I start thinking all kinds of things. Like I'm hungry and I'm really not. Another one...I got a headache cause I am not eating. I can't poop...not enough roughage. See...I told you I am nutz!   375.4 lbs
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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November 30, 2014 - Eve of the Pre-op diet!

Tomorrow I have a class at 8 am in Denton. It is my pre-op class and I start my liquid diet. I can have one lean meal a day & plan on having 2 protein shakes a day. I purchased some of the Atkins protein shakes to start off with to get me started. Not sure if I will like them so much. If I don't I will find something else. I have several options and I am sure tomorrow I will get a lot more information. I did go out to the Unjury site and ordered several of the protein powder shakes to try. Also, I am buying the sugar free syrups to add to the protein shakes. They say it gives them a lot more flavor. And of all things I ordered me a activity tracker. Got it from privotalliving.com and it seems to do the same thing as the fitbit but for a lot less money. We will see?!?!? I plan on moving my big body so I can lose more weight.     http://www.pivotalliving.com
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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November 27, 2014 - Happy Thanksgiving!

I know I should not feel this way...but I kept thinking in my mind, this is my "Last Supper"! I know I'm crazy, but I kept thinking liquids for almost a month and then mushy food for another couple of weeks and graduating foods into my diet just seemed like I was about to have my last meal. I read this article on Bariatricpal.com that Jean McMilian wrote called the "Last Meal Syndrome", of course I read it the day before my pre-op diet starts, so it kinda wasn't good timing. But I think it will help me get through my next few weeks if I can just keep it in the back of my mind. What I got from the article is that it isn't really your last meal, it is the quantity rather than the quality that I will be able to eat. It doesn't mean I can't have certain foods....just can't eat a whole gallon of ice cream. OMG!


Thanksgiving was very nice and enjoyed being around my friends and family. We ate like pigs, enjoyed each others fellowship and had a great day! My cousin Nancy had just moved into a new house and it is just darling. I loved it and was so proud for her. She was a wonderful hostess and a regular "Martha Stewart".

Aileen and Dad had a good conversation! She is such a sweet little girl!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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November 13, 2014 - Good News!

I got the call today from Dr. Provost's office....I am ready to go! I passed my stress tests, got my psych eval, and all my nutrition classes are done. I am now scheduled for surgery on December 15th, 2014 at 2pm. I start my pre-op diet/class December 1st and have a pre-op appointment on December 10th (Wednesday) to get tests run ahead of time for my surgery. So I'm ready!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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November 10th & 11th, 2014 - Stress Test Days

You know what the best thing is about having a stress test? They ask you to eat a fatty meal! hehe! So a chemical stress test is not very pleasant, but I made it through it pretty easily. Your chest tightens up a little and you get a little short of breath, but it really wasn't so bad. What was bad...is driving to Lewisville 2 days in a row, and one of the days was rainy and cold.   Also, mom & dad had some doctor appointments and she couldn't go with me. It helps having someone with me in the car when I have to go so far. Mom calls it an "Outing" (LMAO), but I call it a pain in the butt! Made it both days and now hopefully I passed. I should know something within 48 hours. Keeping my fingers crossed.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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October 31, 2014 - Happy Halloween & Heart Day

Today is 2 of my cousins birthdays and Halloween and here I am on the road to Lewisville to see a cardiologist for my cardiac clearance. I had the 12 lead EKG and am scheduled for a 2 part stress test on November 10th and 11th. I hope to pass them and I will be off to the races. Hopefully I will get scheduled for surgery in December and will start my New Year with my gastric bypass.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Good News!

Today Casey from Dr. Provost's office called and said the insurance company has approved me for my surgery! I am so happy...now I need to get my cardiac clearance and then I will be good to go! When she called I asked for a time frame since the holidays were coming up and she said that all of November's surgery spots are taken and the earliest that I could have surgery would probably be December. That's okay...I can enjoy my Thanksgiving and oh yeah...get my back issues cleared up and be ready to start my new year in style...weight loss style. Hey I can even make a New Year's Resolution to lose weight and actually keep it! Woohoo!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Arf...I hurt my back!

OMG...Yesterday I hurt my back even more when I dragged my walker out of the back of my car. No...it is when I put the walker back in is when I felt a strain/pull in my lower back. So now I am worried about getting my back in order so I can have my surgery. I don't want to be struggling with my back when I have the surgery. I sure hope it is just a strain.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Thursday October 23, 2014 - Last Nutritionist Visit

Yikes things are moving forward. Today was my last nutrition visit with Sarah. My goals have not changed except for the cardio exercising that I have been doing. I sort of twisted my back and it has been bothering me some. She told me to do toning exercises and stop my cardio. I did lose 1 lb and was surprised at that. She is such a nice lady and I am lucky she will be helping me thru this stuff. I have been using mybariatricpal.com more and watching the forums for advice. It does seem to be the best website that I have found dealing with WLS.   http://www.mybariatricpal.com
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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October, 17, 2014 - I'm not Crazy!

Haha! Well the good news is the psychologist thinks I am not nuts & that I seem to have my head on straight & that I am ready for my surgery. It was interesting! I filled out forms for almost an hour, asking some of the same questions but in a different way. Many had to do with alcohol & drugs, which I am lucky in that I have never had a problem with those two things. After the paperwork I spent about an hour with the psychologist & then out the door I went! It was a very nice day here & I rolled down my windows & sang a little country music on the way home, & I don't normally do country music! Now I have one more visit with the nutritionist Sarah next week on the 23rd & then I should meet the requirements for my insurance!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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Why I decided to have WLS?

My health! My health has really deteriorated over the last few years. Diabetes is affecting my eyes, my feet, my kidneys, my back, and circulation in my legs, and those are just the things I can see.   My parents! Mom & Dad are 87 yrs old and they need my help more. They still get around pretty good, but I wish I was able to do more for them. I can see the future where I believe they will need me more and more. So I want to be there for them. They have always been there for me!   I wanna get around better. I used to make my bed everyday and it bugs me that I cannot do that. I can do it but it takes me forever and I stumble around and it is really hard to do. Just simple things that I have always done are so difficult to do. I depend on Russell more and more everyday and I don't want to depend on him for simple tasks, that I really want to do myself.   I want to be able to go more places and do fun things. Like my cousin Nancy wants to do a genealogy trip and I know as I am now I could never make it. I want to hang out with my SIL (sister-in-law) & brother. They do a lot of fun things...like auctions, garage sales, & taking short trips. She is semi retired and likes to do auctions and antiquing and I want to shop with her.   I want to get on an airplane and fly to Orlando and not use a extender seat belt to see my niece Christy and her new house. I wanna be able to drive to Longview and visit my other niece Rachel and be able to get around good enough to check out her apartment and help Mom and Dad get in and out of the car and make it easier for them.
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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September 18, 2014 - 2nd Visit with Sarah the Nutritionist

Oh my this drive to Denton is getting frequent and I do believe it may become even more so soon! The visit with Sarah went well. But instead of losing weight I gained weight. The thought of being on a liquid diet for 4 weeks (2 weeks before surgery and 2 weeks after) sort of has freaked me out. I went home thinking OMG this is really going to happen and I am changing the way I eat for a lifetime. That friggin' notebook says "Lifelong Manual" and that alone was scary to me. But I just went home thinking crazy thoughts and just could not wrap my head around trying to lose weight for the surgery. I really wanted to lose some, but was obsessed with thinking about being on liquids for so long and then eating such little amounts and not being able to drink with meals. OKAY...I know I am thinking crazy thoughts...but it freaked me out. I have new goals and plan on really working hard on the drinking.   My new goals:   1. Continue reduced portions Add more fruit and vegetables.   2. Continue not drinking for 10 minutes before meals. Work toward 15 minutes.   3. Continue chair exercises 3 times a week.   4. Keep looking up information and helpful resources.   5. Try some protein shakes (page 16)   Follow up in 1 month. Smile Remember you are awesome!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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September 4, 2014 - Joan Rivers dies!

OMG! I have never been a big fan of Joan Rivers, but her death hit me like a big huge rock in the face. She goes in for a simple procedure and goes into a coma and dies. Holy crappola! Ya know everyone says, "oh the weight loss surgery is a piece of cake...nothing to it", but I'm like simple my ass! If I have to go under general anesthesia it is not simple and guess what I'm scared! Ok call me a panty waist and sissy...I don't care, I'm SCARED!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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August 18, 2014 - First Visit with Sarah the Nutritionist

Back to Denton! I am going to see the nutritionist Sarah. My first of 3 month visits. We talked about my goals for the next 3 months. For this month she wrote in my "Bariatric Surgery Lifelong Manual" (a notebook with all the information that I need for the whole surgery process). My goals for this month: 1. Reduce portion sizes 2. No drinking 15 minutes before meals. 3. Chair exercises 3 times a week. Follow up in 1 month. Yikes...no drinking 15 minutes before meals. I stay thristy! Because of my diabetes...so this is going to be tough!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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July 31, 2014 - Day 1 of this Journey

Denton, TX! Really! I am driving to Denton to meet with Dr. Provost for the very 1st office visit! Scared...Hell yeah, I'm scared. I'm excited! I'm ready! I'm so many things! They are all going thru my head. The reason I am going to Denton is because my friggin' insurance company only pays if I go see Dr. Provost or another doctor that is in Ft. Worth...so I have decided to see Dr. Provost. Mom is going with me to enjoy the "outing". She loves to get out of the house and she will go anywhere with me. I love my Mom! The appointment went well. Dr. Provost was really nice and his office staff was nice. Sarah the nutritionist was awesome. I have to meet with her every month for 3 months and discuss my goals and attempt to lose some weight. This is a requirement from my insurance company. Also, I need to see a psychiatrist! Oh boy...have they got there work cut out for them. Hehe! I made an appointment to see Sarah next month on September 18th. My journey has started and I am really ready to start a new way of life! But I am still scared!
dmaddox1

dmaddox1

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