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Cha Cha's Journey

A blog by angelburch in General

  • Entries

    47

  • Comments

    76

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    4390

About this blog

Thoughts, Feelings, Ideas, Fears

Entries in this blog

Good and Bad

So today my BF was approved by our insurance company BCBS of MN (we have the same insurance) for her band. I am so incredibly happy for her. She wants to be banded by the 2nd or 3rd week of Christmas. :girl_hug:   Today, something happened with both my daughters, and while I am not willing to put it in this journal, suffice it to say they have both broken my heart and I feel a deep and profound sense of loss. I am scared to death for my youngest (she's 19) and very angry with my oldest (sh

Cold Weather A'Coming

Well we got all of our outside and inside decorations done :clap2: .   My BF should find out tomorrow from the insurance company if she will be approved. I spoke to Ricardo at Dr. Jay's yesterday, and he has faxed over all my paperwork to the insurance company, so hopefully I should find out if I'm approved next week. Once approved, all I'll have to do is schedule my surgery. I want to do it the 2nd week of January.   My DH's dad is very ill and in the hospital. He's had another heart a

Christmas Decorating

Today, my daughter and her hubby are coming over to help decorate for Christmas. We do it up pretty good around here. 10ft tree, lots of lights outside. I love the final product, but the work is really hard, and since my DH had shoulder surgery only 5 weeks ago, he can't really help much - but he sure does TRY!!   15 days smoke-free! Hooray!!! DH brought be a card last night in celebration of 2 weeks smoke-free. He's such a sweetie!!

Chili . . . .YUM!!!

Tonight I made chili for my DH and I. I used the recipe that the nutrionist gave me because it has LOTS of protein in it and actually is very simple and quick (NOTE: I am not big on home-cooking, and usually only fix things that have minimal ingredients and require very little time. But I am going to have to get over that once I have my surgery):   1lb lean ground turkey (browned and then drain and rinse meat) 2 10 oz cans Ro-Tel Tomatoes (being from Texas, we like things spicy:) 1 14.5 oz

In My Dreams

1. I can cross my legs at the knees comfortably 2. I can wear sleeveless shirts with confidence 3. I can sit at a movie theatre and not have my hips "oozing" into the people on either side 4. I can fly on a plane without the people on either side of me being uncomfortable 5. I can tie my shoes while sitting down and not have to hold my breath 6. I can shop in the "regular" size clothing stores/sizes 7. My BMI will go from 44.5 down to the mid 20's 8. That when my husband hugs me,

Thoughts For Today

I saw the psychologist and nutritionist yesterday and both gave me the thumbs up for the surgery :omg: . I can't believe how quickly everything has happened up to this point. I especially enjoyed visiting with the Nutritionist. She was funny but also very informative. She's been working with bariatric patients for years, and has a tremendous amount of experience and information. I really look forward to working with her throughout my journey. I feel that she can be very instrumental to hel

Good Stuff!

Today I am smoke free for 10 days (HOORAY :clap2: ). It's not been easy, that's for sure! But I'm really proud of that accomplishment.   Last night I went for my very first Yoga class. It's a type of Yoga called "Vinyasa" - or also known as "hot yoga". The room is extremely hot, and you really sweat a lot. It was amazing! I will continue to go, even though I can't do half of the stuff, I know that eventually I will be able to. Everyone in the class (including the extremely skinny, inhum

One Week Anniversary!

Today I have been smoke free for one week! No cheating . . . not even once. I will admit that I feel better. My DH and I went for a walk this morning (with the puppies) and I didn't wheeze as much as I have in the past! One week down and a lifetime to go!   I completed my letter to BCBS for my surgery. I will send it to the Doctor's office Monday morning. After that, the only thing left to do is to see the psychologist for my results, and the nutritionist (all at the same time) on Tuesday

Patches are a Miracle

I got the nicotine patch and started wearing it today. NO CRAVINGS!!!!:clap2: Today has been very easy with no desire to smoke. I just hope that it will continue throughout the next few weeks. My DH sat down with me to eat, and he cut his food up into teeny tiny pieces, and ate very slowly and took his time. He did this with me so he could learn what my eating habits are going to be like. He has read everything I've brought to him, and has asked a lot of questions. He's being very support

I've Been Psyched!!!

Today I had my psych evaluation. They let me out without any meds, so I must have fooled them good . Actually it was a good experience and they said "You have a good and realistic understanding of what is expected before, during and after the surgery". I wonder if they've ever really turned anyone down and said that they weren't psychologically ready for the surgery.   Anyway . . as far as smoking goes, it's been tough. I almost cheated today, but made myself picture me skinny. However, t

Toughest Day So Far!

The cravings are hitting really hard. Especially this afternoon. The is by far the hardest it's been. I can't believe how stupid I was to pick up the stupid cigarette, after being smoke free for so long! Stupid stupid stupid!   But this is the first step to getting my band. Dr. Jay won't do the surgery unless I am smoke free for at least 14 days, so this is part of it. I figure if I can get through the next 10 days I should be okay.   I go for my psych evaluation tomorrow at 1:30, an

2nd Day Smoke Free

Okay, so far so good. I've had some pretty harsh cravings, but haven't given in. As the craving hits, I just try to pretend that I'm on a surf board, and try to "ride the wave" all the way in. I know that the physical cravings only last 2-4 days, and there after it's all psychological. I quit before (cold turkey), and I can do it again. This is what I get for picking up a cigarette after being smoke free for 3 1/2 yrs. But this is what I must do in order to be banded. Not to mention the f

TGIF

Today is my last day smoking. I find that I am actually looking forward to the day ending so I can start the "non smoking" part. I have only 6 cigarettes left, and once they are gone, that's it.   My BF is out of town on business, and I miss having her to talk with about this process. She's working on getting Banded too.   However, another lady at my office talked with me about today, and she has an appt with Dr. J next week. She says that since she has decided to do this, it's all she c

Wednesday

As I headed home from work today, I sent my husband a text message that said "Going home to drink!". He sent back "Save me some!" Today was quite stressful, but still very good. Once again, I look forward to Friday. That will be my last smoke day. I have quit smoking in the past (for 3.5 yrs), so I know I can do it.   My BF had her psych visit today . . . they let her out, so she must be safe to be around :scared: .   I updated my Mom about my journey to Lband Heaven, and she is glad th

Just More Thoughts

When I got home this evening, my husband greeted me and wanted to know all about my Dr's visit. He asked a lot of questions, and was very happy for me. He has truly come full circle and is back to being my 100% fully supporting husband. He has expressed his fears of me having surgery (of any kind), and we talked about those. I can tell when I look in his eyes that he is truly supportive   My anger has gone away since it's had a place to go (this journal), and I hope that I didn't make anyo

My 1st Dr's Appt

I saw the Intern at Dr. Jay's office today. She was wonderful! She said I was an excellent candidate. The only thing is that I must quit smoking -- which is cool. I knew I'd have to do that. I quit for 3.5 yrs and then for some stupid reason picked it back up again. So this Friday 11/10 will be my last day smoking. I know it will be hard (been there, done that), but at least I know what to expect. I'm sure I'll be journaling a lot during that time. I've already called and set the appt f

Changed Appt

Today, Dr. S office called me and said that there was a family emergency and he wouldn't be in this week. They would call me later next week to reschedule my appt. That was really really hard for me. After all the emotional ups and downs, I was really looking forward to my first Doctor's appt. So I called a different Doc . . . Dr Jay, which a lot of people on this website use. I was shocked when they said they could see me tomorrow morning at 9:30am. My BF saw him earlier today and she was

ANGRY

I am very angry. I discovered that yesterday when my husband came back from getting his hair cut (we use the same person), and said "We were talking about you getting the LapBand, and she (the hair stylist) said she sure wished you could see a nutritionist before doing this". Something snapped inside my head . . . I actually heard it. It took me a moment to realize that it was inside my head and not something that my husband heard. The anger came out . . . not literally, but all the anger th

Shopping

Last night I had to go shopping for something to wear to a company function. A very nice dinner at a very expensive restaurant to celebrate employees who have been with the company for 15 years or more (My husband has the 15 years, I just celebrated my 13th with the same company). I HATE shopping . . . absolutely hate it. I hate that I wear a size 24, or 3X. I hate that everything I try on looks like an something my grandmother would wear. I hate that everything "dressy" has sparkles and rh

My 1st Dr's Appt

I am so excited! I got an appointment with Dr. Scott at UT Southwestern for Monday at 3pm:clap2: I can't wait to go see them and start this journey. Today, my husband informed me that he was having his dream come true . . . he's getting lasik surgery . . . on January 5th! While I am very happy for him, I was hoping to have my surgery the 1st week of January. So, now it will have to wait another week or two. Perhaps I can get mine prior to January 1st. Either way, I'm very please about my decisio

Monday - Oct 30

Today, my friend Steph called the Plano Surgery Center, and they've already set up her 1st appt for this Wednesday at 2pm. I am soooo excited for her. I had called the UT Bariatric Center last Friday, and they said they would call me this week to set my appt. If they don't call this week (or they set my appt out in to December), I am going to call the same place Steph did. I have already met all my deductibles for this year, and would like to get banded this year.

Decision Made

After many days/weeks of reviewing this website, I have finally decided to to do. I called the Bariatric Surgery Center (at UT Southwester in Dallas) on Friday (10/27) to make an appointment. They asked me if I were interested in the by-pass or the lap band. I told them that I was interested in both. They are supposed to call me back next week for my first appointment.:drum: I have be trying to decide which surgery is the best option for me. Then yesterday, my best friend, Steph (who is c

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