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My Journey

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Living With Lapband And Staying On Track For Me!

Happy Saturday Bandsters!   Hope everyone has had a great week. I finally fell like I am getting back on track from my last fill on January 30th. This time it has taken me much longer to recover and get adjusted to my meal plan, it has been like step one learning to eat all over again. I really struggled the first couple of weeks post fill and had to rely on protein shakes more than I would have liked to but I am finally eating solids 3 meals a day, no hunger or snacking between meals and able to get at least 90% of my protein with solids. I still struggle a little in the mornings with solids, but I just keep trying and eventually I know I will be able to do breakfast of eggs again. So for now breakfast will just have to be Greek Yogurt with some additional berries and a little high protein Kashi. My weight loss since the fill has finally leveled off to about a pound a week, but the rapid weight loss during the first few weeks made my hair start to fall out again. I was bad, I did not take my vitamins like I should have and now am paying for it but have gotten back on track this past week. I went back to the gym this morning, this is the first time I have done formal exercise, except walking since my knee surgery last year in November. It felt good just to make my self go, I took it slow and did not over do it, I was a little nervous and afraid I would struggle with the knee exercises but I did well. Exercised for 40 minutes than stretched for 10-15 minutes. Great way to start a Saturday, I have decided to go to the gym on Tuesday and Thursdays after work, and Saturday mornings. I am going to try hard not to over do it like I did last time so I do not re-injure myself. I also had them to remeasure me this morning and since I started the gym last year, I have dropped 23.3 lbs and 23.75 inches, not to bad since I have not exercised since September of last year. I think the most dramatic drop has been my waist and my bust. I have dropped my waist from 40 inches to 33 inches and 5 inches off my bust. Needless to say, it is time to buy bras again... Again I could put my husbands tube socks in to fill out the cups. I really need to work on my thighs, honestly out of all of my saggy body parts, I hate my upper inner thighs. If anyone has any good suggestions for some great exercises for the inner thighs let me know, I am going to concentrate on the legs so at least I won't look to much like a Shar Pia this summer. This week I was reading the blogs and really liked one that (MorelGirl) I think the blog was timely and could really hit home for a lot of us, Logical Me and Emotional Me. That blog really hit home for me, logically I always know what I should be doing but emotionally sometimes it is so difficult to remember everything I am suppose to do and not allow the emotional side win over the logical side. Take for instance, waiting so long to get a fill, I knew for months I needed a fill, but kept telling myself, you can do this, you can manage your portions, you know what to eat. Well logically, yes I do know what to eat, but it was nice to eat what everyone else was eating, little pizza, little bread, little pasta. Even thought I did not gain weight, I was not losing, I had convinced myself I was just at a plateau but honestly that was emotional me trying to convince logical me that it was OK to eat that stuff. So I will not cry over spilled milk and I will not lose anymore time feeling sorry for time lost. I am refocused, back on track and will faithfully blog and be accountable to myself. It is so easy to drift back into bad habits, and thank you Morel Girl for snapping me back into reality. So since I am back in the Green Zone and back on track I am posting a few tips for all of us to learn to live by. Please learn from my mistakes, do not give up on the band, remember to use it as the tool it was designed to be. If your adjustments are not quite right keep going back and insisting they get them right. Remember it is not the amount in your band but how you respond to the amount in your band. It takes some of us longer than others to get to our "sweet spot", some just need a little adjustment, some need more. Stay in touch with your surgeon and attend the support groups locally if you can, support is important because even though our family and friends support us if they have never been "overweight" really they can not help us or identify with us. Remember we are all individuals and we will all lose weight and have different amounts in our bands, we should never compare the amounts in our bands, we are indivduals and will all respond differently to the lap band. The most improtant thing we can do is learn from others successes and failures. Standing alone sometimes we may feel powerless but as a group we are strong and very powerful. Have a great weekend friends. Love and Good Luck to all, Diane       Lifestyle Guidelines After LAP-BAND® Surgery   10 Tips for healthy living   Here are ten simple but important tips that will help you achieve your weight loss goals with the LAP-BAND® System. Remember, your success depends a lot on your ability to commit to a new way of eating — and embrace your new way of living. Show All   1. Aim to eat three small meals a day.   The LAP-BAND® System creates a small stomach pouch that can hold about one-quarter cup (approx. 2 oz) of food. Eating more can stretch the stomach, canceling the effect of your procedure. 2. Eat slowly and chew thoroughly.   Food can only pass through the new stomach opening (or “stoma”) if it has been chewed into very small pieces (about 15–20 times per bite). 3. Stop eating as soon as you feel satisfied.   Once your stomach pouch is full, your body receives a signal that you have eaten enough. If you rush through your meal, you may overeat before this signal reaches your brain. 4. Avoid or limit drinking before or during meals.   If you drink in the 15 to 20 minutes before, or during, your meal, the food you eat becomes liquid and the effectiveness of the LAP-BAND® System is greatly reduced. Take only small sips with meals. 5. Limit eating between meals.   Snacking between meals is one of the major reasons for weight loss failure. You should not feel hungry between meals. If you are, it’s a good idea to keep healthy snacks on hand. Remember, to listen to your band to stay in the Green Zone. You may need an adjustment if you are persistently hungry. 6. Eat only good-quality, nutritious food.   Your meals should be high in protein and vitamins. Don’t fill up on high-sugar, high-fat “junk” foods which lack the important vitamins and nutrients you need. Talk to your doctor to determine the right nutrition and vitamin supplement plan for you. 7. Avoid fibrous food.   In general, foods that contain many fibers, like asparagus, can block the stoma. Even with thorough chewing, saliva sometimes cannot break the fibers down enough for them to pass. Try cooking fibrous foods well, then cut them into very small bites and chew them thoroughly. You’ll soon learn what your body can and cannot tolerate. 8. Drink enough fluids during the day.   Drink at least 6 to 8 glasses of water daily, in small amounts, all day long (but not right before, during or after meals). This helps you stay hydrated and eliminate waste from your body. 9. Drink only low-calorie liquids.   If you drink high-calorie liquids (even healthy ones like fruit juice) you may not lose weight, even if you are following your diet with good, band-friendly eating habits. 10. Keep moving.   This is an important tip. Physical activity burns calories and increases weight loss. Once your doctor clears you to exercise, aim for 30 to 45 minutes of moderate to high activity, 3 to 5 times a week. A lot of calorie-burning activities can be fun and rewarding.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Valentine's Day

Well bandster family, I hope many of you took the time yesterday to spend Valentines Day with someone you love and who has supported you. I got up early yesterday, 5am and baked Valentine's for my wonderful Husband, Son and staff. I made vanilla cupcakes with marshmallow cream center, butter cream frosting and decorated with edible glitter and hearts and kisses. Now I know my friends here are saying, WTF is wrong with Diane, she is suppose to be making better choices. I love to bake and I believe it is OK for me to have a taste of something sinful like a cupcake once in a while. It is only a problem if I bake and eat the whole recipe. Actually I enjoyed less than a quarter of a cupcake and I was very satisfied. Tonight I want to share what a wonderful Valentine's Day I had with my hubby, we got all dressed up and went out to dinner and a comedy show at a place here in our local town of Greenville, SC. "Café and then Some" and saw a show called "Life after Oprah" I have never laughed so hard. We joined our best friends, my girl friend had a gastric sleeve about 6 months after my lap band surgery so we are the perfect friends who can share a meal. The night did not start out to well for me, I had two bites of salad and it got stuck, it took about 3 trips to the bath room to get it unstuck but than I was able to enjoy a wonderful appetizer of 3 succulent broiled scallops wrapped in Bacon with a Hollandaise sauce. I left the bacon but the scallops were delicious and so moist and juicy. I had one small glass of Pino Noir and a strawberry dipped in chocolate for desert. I thought I had died and gone to heaven. It was a wonderful evening, I enjoyed my meal the company and we looked smashing if I do say so myself. I am attaching a couple of pic's one from 2 years ago when I was as my hubby puts it Large and in charge and one from tonight. Life and living with Lap Band is possible and we can all do this if we believe in ourselves.         Now you tell me, does lap band work. I say, oh hell yes it does. I think I look pretty good for a 56 year old lady. Remember Lap Band Friends and Family this is a journey!   All of us can do this, with time, dedication and support of the ones we love.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

New Milestone

Well banster family, I hit a new milestone today I wanted to share. I had a check up with the doctor and when I weighed in today, I am no longer obese,I am now just over weight. Now only my bandster family can appreciate what that means. I started this journey 14 months ago and at that time by the charts I was considered morbidly obese. Needless to say I am very excited. To reach my goal I only need to loss 12 additional pounds, now to no longer be considered over weight I would need to loose an additional 26lbs. My doctor and I decided on a weight based on my bone structure and muscle mass. Now that being said I never started this journey to be thin, my Goal; was to be healthy. It feels good to have energy and not longer have knees that hurt all the time. I feel very blessed to have done so well this passed year and am thankful for my supporting husband and family and for my wonderful surgeon for always being understanding. I never considered skinny and me in the same sentence and it still bothers me when people say I am skinny. I am by no means skinny, they were just so use to seeing me "Healthy" aka Fat that I do look "Skinny". Today people said," now your not going to lose more weight are you because you sure look skinny". So I replied, Yes I do plan to lose a few more pounds because I am still above the goal my physician and I have set. Well that just lead to well, you don't want to lose too much more, you don't want to look old. OMG! Did the forget I am old, and I would rather be think and old than obese and old. So I ask "What does skinny actually mean?" Below are the definitions for Skinny and Overweight. Definition of SKINNY Definition:   1: resembling skin : membranous   2 a: lacking sufficient flesh : very thin : emaciated b: lacking usual or desirable bulk, quantity, qualities, or significance   Definition: Overweight refers to an individual weighing 10% or more of what is considered his or her recommended healthy weight   I actually think I take more offense to being called skinny then to being called overweight.... emaciated. Boy I never thought anyone would use that word to describe me. When I think emaciated, I have an image in my mind of a someone who is so thin you can count their ribs. Now I may be thinner but believe me you can not count my ribs and baby still got Back! Now for those of you just starting your journey, you are probably thinking what is this women ranting about, but seriously can no one give a compliment these days. If you can't say something nice to someone just keep your mouth closed, thank you.   Well I feel better now and I will continue on my journey and will stop losing when my physician and I feel I am at a healthy weight for my body type.   Thanks for Listening and allowing me to rant.   Good luck to all of my bandster family, keep motivated, focused and all dreams can come true with dedication and time.  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Perserverance Or Stubborn?

I have always loved the early morning hours of the day. The time before the sun comes up, the house is quiet, every one is still asleep. This is my time of the day to just ly quietly in bed and reflect about the day ahead and plan. This is also the time of day that I can relect on how blessed I have been in my life, thanking God for my wonderful family and friends and for giving me the strength to handle almost anything that falls in my path. Now.....back to the present! (For those of you who do not know me, I had surgery October 2010) I had a fill two weeks ago, my idea. I must admit the past 2 weeks have been pure HELL! I did my 48 hours of liquids like I was instructed but unlike every other fill I was not able to go right back to solids after the initial 48 hours. (Note: after my second fill in May of last year I was over filled and had to have an unfill. I was unable to drink liguids let alone eat.) I had to progress my self through full liguids, to soft and than to solids. I almost gave in several times and was tempted to go back and say, "Take some Damn fluid out I want to EAT." But I didn't, I drank my protein, which I do not love, every day I would take my breakfast, lunch and dinner, take a few bites push it away and drink a protein drink. I didn't have reflux, I didn't throw up, liquids passed without any difficulty and I had no desire to eat. I didn't feel hungry, Not sure I understand why but after my fill this time everything tastes different, things I loved before my fill, I don't like or want. The past 3 days have been good, I have been able to eat solids for lunch and dinner. Breakfast is still a little touchy, I do a couple of bites but than just decide to drink a protein drink. Sadly I have not even enjoyed my Starbucks! May weekday ritual is always a "Triple Tall, Skinny Carmel Machiatto" I have tried several different lattes this week and after about drinking a third i just toss it. Tossing a $5 cup of coffee is pretty expensive so I think I will give up on them for a while. They just don't seem to taste good! Sorry Starbucks, I will hold on to my Gold card but I guess you won't be getting rich of me for a while. My goal for the upcoming week is to increase my calories and find something that tastes really good and yummy. I have only be averaging about 600 cal a day for about 2 weeks, so I have been faithfully taking my vitamans and adding protein when ever I can to increase the calories and make sure my hair doesn't fall out. I have lost 10 lbs since my fill, the 4 lbs I had gained and 6 additional lbs. So this morning I way in at a "skinny 165" Hope everyone has a Great Sunday. Adding a new pic, of me and the family at Christmas.  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Wow, It's Like Starting Over

Well I hope all my friends are doing well. I have spent the morning reading and trying to catch up on how everyone is progressing. I noticed I had not posted since November of last year: why, not sure. The holidays came and went with no major issues, I got a GI bug before Christmas and learned I could truly vomit after being banded and it was not a pleasant experience. I learned that even with a band Thanksgiving and Christmas can be very challanging holidays. Who does not enjoy the smell of fresh baked cookies and pies and lets not forget about that wonderful dinner with all the sides. My family was a little disappointed because I chose not to bake, but why tempt a former fat person. I may have learned alot over the past year but I still love food and I love the wonderful traditions that I have enjoyed since I was a child so I decided to let my daughter do the baking for the family, they live 4 and half hours away so they were not in my easy reach. Early in January I started to notice that I was not staying as satisfied between meals, I would eat my portions but I could usually down my portion in about 10 minutes. I knew this was not good but hated the idea of getting a fill. Any of you that have followed my blog know that I have not had but a few fills but my last one resulted in an overfill and an unfill before they got it right. Multiple sticks later I was back in the green zone again. Well I went to see my surgeon the second week of Jan and had my 3rd fill on Jan 30th. What an event, I had an esphogeal spasm when he pulled the fluid out of my band," it felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest." But I survived and the past week has been as fun as I remember, that is where Wow, it;s like starting over comes in. My first thought after this fill was, "Why can I not just learn to control my hunger so I don't have to go through this." 48 hours of clear liquids, than advance to soft than to solids. It has taken me 7 days to advance back to solids and it is really small amounts, about 2 ozs every 2-3 hours. I had to go back to the protein drinks to get all my protein in for a few days. I thought I might be too full, but I can pass liquids easily and solids if I chew them well. I think I had been a little more unrestricted than I thought for quite sometime and had become comfortable with managing my portions on my own. I lost 7 lbs last week but have finally leveled off maintained for the past few days, I am gradually adding solids back into my diet and cutting back on the protein drinks. So I guess this past week I have learned that this truly is a life long journey! Never give up and stay true to your self and you will be successful.....................

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Some answers to Your most burning questions... How much will I lose with Lap Band?

OK, I have been posting on this blog for a year now and those of you who know me have come to realize I am a bit of a nerd and spend a lot of time surfing the INTERNET looking for and asking questions. I try hard to read all the posts and make comments when I can but one theme that keeps popping up for many is their frustration with not losing the amount of weight they wanted to or fast enough. I like many of you probably did not ask all the right questions. I am a nurse and I know I did not ask everything and have found out a lot of my answers on this blog, on the INTERNET and from my own dumb mistakes. I am no expert but I am a true believer that we can all learn from each others life experiences. I am not your typical lap band patient. I have lost greater than my 50% of my total weight in my first year and believe me I feel very fortunate but I have worked the program. But if you really knew me you would learn to know that when I set my mind at something, I can be very OCD. I use this blog as my new addiction, I checking it religiously to see how others are doing, it is free and it does not add any inches to my hips or numbers to my scales. So you ask, what is Diane trying to tell us??? Well tonight I was doing my usual INTERNET surfing. My question was, How much weight can a lap band patient expect to lose?Wow, imagine, I found some answers and all were pretty consistent with what my doctor had told me. Hmmm, I also found this calculator on gottolose.org How much can I expect to lose? So I plugged in my height and starting weight and this is what it said.... I was 116 lbs over weight when I started, My ideal body weight should be 132 and I could expect to lose between 29 to 63 LBS. Well friends do the math that is about 50% give or take a few pounds of what I need to lose. 50% of my weight would be 58 lbs. To date I have lost 80 lbs, and by their numbers I have another 36 lbs to lose. It also showed me how much I could have lost if I had the gastric sleeve or the bypass and guess what I have pretty much exceeded all their numbers. My point is, no matter what surgery we have ladies and gentleman, WE have to work the program, not 50% or 75% of the time but ALL the time. We have to continue to work to change our behavior and develop healthy habits. This is more than just losing weight, this is gaining life and a better quality of life so like the article says, focus on how you feel not how much you are losing. Focus on all the positive and not the negative. Also everyone, stop beating yourself up, we are all worth the effort and we are all our worst critque. No one ever needs to tell us we did something wrong, we are all to busy say, yes I did it that was me Guilty as Charged. So you ask, if you have lost what they statistically expected are your going to settle, the answer is NO, not only NO but Hell NO! I am going to prove their statistics wrong, invalid, and I challange each of you to do the same.   Here ya go!   Your Most Burning Questions about Lap Band Surgery So you'rethinking about having Lap Band surgery for weight loss, you're bound to have alot of questions. How does it work? How will it affect my life? How much doesit cost? These and many other questions are important to ask, and Iencourage you to learn more. But for today's purposes let's get straight to thequestion that is foremost in everyone's minds:   How muchweight can I expect to lose with the Lap Band?   There are really twoanswers to that question. Let's take a look.   ANSWER #1:Most people lose 50 to 60 percent of their excess weight with the Lap Band.   Some people lose a little more. Somepeople lose a little less. But, on average, most patients who have the Lap Bandprocedure lose half to almost two-thirds of their excess weight in the first 1to 3 years.   So what does that translate into in terms of howmany pounds you'll lose? That all depends on where you're starting from. Theheavier you are, the more pounds you will lose. For example, take someone whoweighs 600 pounds with excess weight of 450 pounds. If they lose 50 percent oftheir excess weight, they'll see 225 pounds go away. In contrast, consideranother person who starts at 220 pounds with 65 pounds of excess weight. Fiftypercent of their weight would be 33 pounds or more.   So the pounds lost will vary greatly per person,but the ultimate goal is the same: to lose a significant chunk of the extraweight you're carrying around. We strive to work with each patient to reach aweight loss of two-thirds of their excess body weight. What that means for youwill be based on your personal needs.   How much you'll lose will also depend on how muchyou adapt to the guidelines for eating andexercise after you get the Lap Band. The good news is you're notalone on this part. We have a whole aftercarestaff whose job is to help you to adapt and maintain and healthier lifestyle.Plus, your Lap Band will be the best reminder of all, helping you to feel fullafter eating theright amount offood for weight loss.   You also might be wondering how fast you'll lose the weight. The answeris that you should see a nice, steady weight loss over 18 months to 3 years.Honestly, this is not about speed, because rapid weight loss is not going to bea healthy weight loss. This is one of the great things about the Lap Band.Because it's adjustable, we can keep modifying the restriction level you'regetting to make sure you're achieving a successful rate of weight loss, allwhile also avoiding the rapid weight loss that you may not be able to maintain.Depending on your starting BMI, a good rate of weight loss will probably beanywhere from two to eight pounds per month.   All this said, there is another answer to thequestion of "how much weight will I lose."   ANSWER #2: Don't focus on the pounds.Focus on how you feel.   Don't focus too much on exactly how many poundsyou're losing per month and comparing what you're losing to others you meet,say, in your support group. You're going to know ifyou're making good progress toward your weight loss goal even if you never stepon a scale. Because you're going to feel better.   Losing weight is the main purpose for getting theLap Band. But that's really just a means to an even more important end:improving your health.   As you lose the weight, you're going to startfeeling better. You're going to have more energy. You'll be able to do thingsyou couldn't do before – from touching your toes and fitting into clothes youfeel great in to playing on the floor with your kids and going for a brisk walkwith a friend. For many Lap Band patients, losing weight even means improving orputting an end to troubling medical conditions from diabetes and high bloodpressure to sleep apnea and acid reflux.   So, while I can't tell you exactly how many poundsyou personally will lose, I can tell you this. Thanks to weight loss with theLap Band, you should be physically and mentally healthier. You'll have a betterquality of life. You'll feel more confident. And, you can expect to live longer.   Repostfrom: by Nives Champion Aftercare Manager at True Results January 27, 2011  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

One Year Band-iversary

Well October the 27th was my one year band-iversary. Wow... what a year this has been. If you would have asked me a year ago if I thought I would be where I am today I am not sure how I would have answered. The road has been bumpy along my journey, I have been too lose, I have been too tight, I have peaked and plateaued weeks and months on end. I have lost no pounds, I have gained a pound or two, I have lost inches, I have not exercised, I have over exercised and I have had knee surgery but my biggest accomplishment is that I really do love "me" and I have learned that food is a necessity for nutrition not a coping mechanism. If I learn nothing else from this journey it will be that I can get angry, upset and frustrated and I know McDonald's is not my friend, my friends have been my family, my co-workers and all of you who have supported me and encouraged me. To all of you who are just starting, or who are struggling and to those of you who have been successful, share your success, admits your mistakes and love yourself! We are all worth the effort that this journey takes!   I weighed in this week at 168, still not at goal but very pleased with my progress and yes, I really do" love the new me." I am going to share some before and now photos with you. I have dropped from a size 24 to a 12.   Cyber Hugs and Kisses to All!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Positive Energy

I sit here tonight after a long day at work, reading blogs and watching "Dancing with the Stars." As I am watching these people 'stars" put them self out there doing something that pushes them out side their comfort zone it came to me, "Is that not what each of us are doing?" We are putting ourselves out in front of everyone and allowing ourselves to be judged for our progress in our journey. I would like for all of us to give ourselves a "10" tonight. A "10" for being willing to admit we are not perfect. A "10" for taking each day, "one day at a time." A '10" for each new healthy habit we embrace and enculturate into our daily routine. We are all individuals and each of us has their strengths and weaknesses that we need to highlight. If we collectively added up all the weight each of us have lost over the past 6 months or a year, would we not be the "biggest losers." And guys being a loser on this site is a WONDERFUL thing, we need to stop thinking, I only lost a half of a pound, I only lost a pound. Instead we need to be saying, "WOW, I lost another pound. After all we are not the gainers we are the losers. For the first time in our life losing is winning. Now how often can you make a negative a positive. We may stall occasionally, we may stumble, we may even fall, but we will pick ourselves up, we will admit we strayed and we will get back on track. So I challenge each of my cyber friends in this weight loss journey to pick one positive affirmation to post for the week and embrace the positive energy it will instill in your life. I am posting a web site that I think may help us all if we could just allow ourselves to believe in our selves and open our minds to some positive thinking. http://www.vitalaffi...ons.htm#example     When I chose my name for this blog I used the positive affirmation theory. LovetheNewMe. Honestly when I started on this journey I did not love anything about me but now after a year of logging into this blog and signing on everyday with my user name "LovetheNewMe." I do love me, I love the person I am becoming, part due to weight loss but even deeper than what you see on the outside. I love the person I am on the inside. It is hard to love yourself, we are our toughest critique, we judge our selves and we always see our failures not our successes. Each time we loss an inch or a pound or make it through a day always choosing healthy foods is a successes. We should celebrate every success we have, big and small. We are learning to lIVIT not dIET, we are learning to Love ourselves.   My affirmations for my journey are:   1. I choose to make positive healthy choices for myself   2. When I believe in myself, others will believe in me also   I say my affirmations every morning as I am getting ready for work, I look in the mirror and yes I talk to myself. and no I am not wacky.   So my challenge to all of us is we put our best foot forward and and get the positive energy flowing on this blog, love your self, support yourself and most important believe in yourself, why you ask, why because you are WORTH IT.   Have a great week all.  

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Is long term success with Lap band Possible?

This is the question of the day. I have been reading the blogs this week and it is so distressing to see so many of my Lap band bloggers struggling with this very topic. I wish there was a magic wand we could all wave or a crystal ball that we could all look into and see if we were going to be successful. Personally the biggest fear we all have if we are willing to admit is FAILURE. We all ended up here not because we were just wanting to lose weight but because we needed to lose weight, it had impacted our lives in some way and we wanted out. But sometimes what we all do not realize is how much work this is honestly going to be. This is a life long journey and I'm not sure all of us realized that when we signed on. I walked into this with my eyes wide open and I realize that this will be a journey that I will work and live my entire life. I had a incident this past week that made me realize just how easy it would be to screw up. I have done exceptionally well with my lap band and have lost weight well. Maybe almost to well. It has almost given me a since of false security. This past week has been hard, I went back to work after surgery and everyday I threw up. I ask why did I throw up, because I did not follow the rules. I threw up daily and sometimes several times a day for 3 days in a row. On Friday evening my husband and I went to dinner, he wanted Mexican. I didn't feel well but I went. I decided to not order and just share some of his dinner, good move I thought. Where did I go wrong, I allowed my self to eat the one thing I know I have no control over. CHIPS! Well ladies and gentleman I paid for it and I paid dearly. No I did not throw up but oh God I wish I could have. I had the most horrific pain I have ever had in my life. I hurt myself with my self destructive behavior. To be honest I don't care if I ever see another tortilla chip for the rest of my life. I surfed the INTERNET looking for how much damage I had done to my self and my band. So fearful that I had stretched my pouch with my stupidity. In my search a came across this article for some tips for long term success from a lap band patient. I like everyone of us wants long term success and I know I will not find it at the bottom of a tortilla chip bowl. Good Luck to all my new friends and I know we can all learn to lIVIT instead of dIET!     Below is just a small part of the article if you want to read the article in it;s entirety go to http://ezinearticles.com/?Long-Term-Success-With-Lap-Band-Weight-Loss-Surgery---10-Lessons-Learned-by-Successful-Patients&id=3892363, I also posted a link to her blog.     My doctor, my head coach on this banded living journey reminds me over and over again, that it's a tool, and I need to work it. I shouldn't expect "it" to do anything. (A screwdriver can't remove a screw unless you turn it.) I have to work it to get the results I want - and for me that was more than the average 5o% Excess Weight Loss. My band helps me with portion control, controls my hunger, and leaves me with a feeling of satiety when I work it. Here are the 10 things I learned about how to use my tool:       I stay close to my surgeon and his staff. I have a whole team of people to help me on my journey. It starts with my surgeon who is my head coach. I also surround myself with other successful members of the Banded Living community. I don't drink with meals. It defeats the band. I make sure I get enough protein everyday. I eat good quality meals and I don't graze. I do best when I eat for 20 -30 minutes and leave the table. I don't drink my calories - my properly adjusted band helps with portion control but only if I am eating solid foods. (It doesn't restrict ice cream or a high calorie frappuccino, or Long Island Iced Tea). I've learned to take small bites and chew, chew, chew. I also use small plates. I've learned what foods are difficult for me, and I stay away from those choices. I have lots of great choices. I've learned to dine and enjoy food again. I always have a plan or a least a plan B, each and every day for how I am going to use my tool. NO EXCUSES. I'm not afraid to carry food with me (Ziploc bags are my friends), or ask a hotel to open the gym at 5:00 am because I'm traveling and have an early meeting. I journal when I need to. I journaled consistently during my first year of Banded Living. When I wander off track, or gain a few pounds, I go back to basics and journal for a while. It helps me stay in my target weight range by keeping me accountable to myself. I make myself a priority. I take care of my health, I eat right, I exercise, I take my vitamins...and live my life to the fullest!   Now I'm not saying that I use my tool perfectly all of the time. What I am saying is that I've learned how to use my Lap-Band to get great results and keep myself in the same (small) pair of jeans for over 2 years. When I don't use my tool correctly, I gain a few pounds, but I know how to go back to basics, and keep my weight within a normal, healthy range.   If you or someone you care about has a lap band or is struggling with significant weight issues learn more about Banded Living by visiting http://www.bandedliving.com, a community for lap band patients, by lap band patients.   To learn more about how Gloria Samuels uses her lap band to maintain her 90 lb weight loss, visit http://www.gloriasbandedliving.com.   © 2010 Banded Living, LLC. All Rights Reserved.       Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/3892363

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Why do we sabotage our selves?

Have you ever really sat down and wondered how you got to this point in your life? You know how did you end up on a blog pouring our your inner most feelings to strangers. Well I know how I got here, how about YOU? I got here by lying to myself, telling myself that if no one saw me eat it, it did not count. I got here, by snacking on unhealthy foods, potato chips, candy bars, ice cream, soda, alcohol, bread, snack food, snack food, snack food. I got here by always making excuses as to why I ate something, why my diet failed. It was a dinner, a party at work, an outing with friends, I could cheat just once because, I COULD CONTROL THE BINGE! Well guess what I LIED, How about you? Have any of you ever lied to your self that you were in control? I did then and I do now and you know what I probably always will unless I learn to call myself on every morsal I put in my mouth that does not belong there. Have you ever wondered why the people who are successful are successful with lap band and weight loss surgery or diets? Why, because the follow the rules 99.9% of the time. I am not there yet, I still back slide, and I still beat myself up and promise I won't do it again. Why I am where I am today? I had to have surgery on my knee and this was just all the sympathy I needed for myself to start lying to myself. No I have not gained any weight but I have eaten things I know I cannot control. So I have spent countless hours trying to figure out how to make up for what I ate, so I'm hungry most evenings, not satisfied with my choices and feel like crap. Oh but it's OK. right, I had surgery, it is OK to allow myself a few days off for good behavior? WRONG, that is the thinking of an addict, an addict who has slipped and is lying to themselves again. Believe me I know what I eat, I log every morsal I place in my mouth, I am not eating enough protein, and I consistently eat too much fat. I have been trying to eat 40-30-30 and it ends up more like 40-20-40. (Carbs-Protein-Fat)So why am I bloging this today, because everyday I read about how one of us is doing good, one of us has back slide and one of us is searching for the right answer. We can not help each other or support one another if we do not hold ourselves and each other accountable. I need someone to call me on my bad behavior, I may not like it but, what good does it do me if I am allowed to continue back down a path of destruction. What good does it do any of us? We all made a decision or are making a decision to have surgery to help us control what we were not able to. So why sabotage our selves? Why go through all the physiological evaluations, jump through all the insurance hoops if we are going to continue to lie to our selves. I am nearing my one year anniversary this month, maybe that is what prompted this blog. I have lost 74 lbs and still have 34 lbs to go by the height and weight charts. I have been stalled for months; most days I eat right on target, I have restriction or "I am at my sweet spot" I have thought about a fill just so I eat less but know that is not the answer. So what is the answer? I guess that is a personal answer for all of us. To me the answer is learning to live a healthy life, make healthy decisions every waking minute of my day. To me it is hard wiring or rewiring my thinking so it becomes natural and not a daily chore. To me it is not allowing unhealthy foods into my shopping cart or on to my dinner table. I may not be able to control what my family eats but I can control what is brought into my house and I have a Rights. I have the right not to subject myself to unhealthy atmospheres, friends or family who do not support my choice to make a healthy life for myself. This may sound harsh but I have to be committed to this because every corner I turn there is someone or something there that if I allow it, it will help me to sabotage myself. So friends, take inventory of your life and YOUR cupboards because no one but US is going to help US make it. So my question when I started this rant,"Why do we sabotage ourselves?" So why do "YOU" sabotage yourself, do you know?

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Frustrated!

I just want to say, could we please have an auto save to our posts as we type. I just spent 30 minutes responding to a blog only to have it lost due to accidently hitting the back button. so frustrating, I will try again later. Am I the only idiot out here who does this grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Another Step toward Success!

Well fellow banisters I had my knee surgery today and now am back on my road to success. I started my journey today at 8am, I woke up this morning, nervous and scared and THIRSTY! Boy was it a long night, why is it when you know you can't have anything to drink you fine yourself wanting it the most. I arrived at the outpatient surgery center a head of schedule at 1045am. They took be back at 11am, checked my vitals, (nurse concerned because my pulse was only 44, I had to reassure her that this was normal because of my medications) They did a pregnancy test, I had to laugh and so did she when I told her I had already given birth over the past 11 months to a 75lb toddler. She looked at me like I was crazy, so this will be our little joke. I had 2 mg of Versed around 1:15, (what a wonderful drug, it allows you to relax and not remember or care what they are about to do to you) I was so humbled by the support of my friends and co-workers at the hospital, the all descended upon with their support and prayer at my bedside before surgery. I knew the moment the arrived that God had sent them to me to help me to relax and take away all of my anxiety. It feels so wonderful to have friends that support you, they have been such a blessing through my journey this past year and I know with out their constant support and praise this would have been so much more difficult. I woke up in the recovery room around 2:15 and was not prepared for the pain I was having in my knee. Not sure what I thought but I honestly thought this was going to be a piece of cake because I had so much pain prior to pain. My knee was on fire and it hurt all the way up my other thigh. But there was my nurse "Janie" she was so compassionate, she place ice on my knee, raised my head, and was so concerned over my pain and wanted to fix it. She gave me ½ mg of Dilaudid and 150mg of Toradol; she monitored my v/s frequently and finally after 15 minutes had my pain under control. I must admit I was nervous to take the narcotic, Dilaudid because of what happened post op with my Lap Band but Janie was so understanding and compassionate that I knew she would make sure I was well monitored and safe. I was discharge to the care of my husband around 240pm, now that being said. I know none of you know me but I am not used to being cared for, I am the care giver and make a lousy patient. He brought me home, placed me in bed, went to pick up my RX's and made sure everything was in my reach. (He had to go back to work and left me in the hands of my son Michael) Michael was wonderful, he waited on my had and foot all evening. He made my dinner, Chicken Picatta, vegetables and bread. I was so nauseated still and unable to eat but a few bites, I opted to take another phenergan and take a nap. I work around 9:30pm and was finally able to take in some food, but of course the finicky band like always only allowed me to enjoy about a ¼ of what I would normally eat. But it is what it is and it tasted wonderful. Awake again, pain about a 4, so ice, a pain pill and more liquids for me. I am so excited that I can again get busy in the very near future with my exercise program (however that looks) so I can seriously loss this last 25 lbs. Thank you to all of my bandster family and all of your support these last few weeks. I have been so fortunate in my journey with Lapland and want so much to help any of you struggling with your weight loss. I do not have all the answers but I can lend you support and tell you that being positive even in your darkest hour will help pull you through and help you to remain courageous and true to your journey. Remember this is for "YOU" and about "YOU" be true to "Yourself". YOU and only YOU know what you put in your mouth! Make this a lifestyle change and use your band to assist you during this transition. I dedicate this POST to my new found cyber friend "Arnetta". Please know that I believe in you and I know you will be successful. These first few weeks are hardest but you will find your inner strength. Prayers and cyber Hugs to all of you! Diane

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Small Accolades

Today is around 5 weeks since I hurt my knee and had to stop exercising. I must say it has been a very frustrating month. I have been doing therapy 3 times a week, now for 3 weeks and seriously there is little improvement. Not sure what I expected, "I think miracles". I guess my saving grace is that at least this did not happen at the beginning of my journey and I had already made progress. I have managed to maintain my weight loss and have even lost a few pounds. But I so much miss exercising, every time I see someone jogging or walking it makes me sad and makes me realize how much we all take for granted. Lap band surgery has given me back my life, I have so much more energy and has helped me re-build confidence in myself. I never realized how much being overweight had effected all aspects of my life. I wonder sometimes why I needed the lap band and why I could not have wrapped my brain around learning to control my portions myself. It took potential life altering health problems to shake me to reality and do something about my weight gain. The band truly is my friend and makes staying on track so much easier. I have thought many times over the past few months about getting a fill in my band so I would be able to lose weight faster. Patience has never been one of my attributes. I have always wanted instant gratification in what ever I did. I am glad I made the decision to work with the band instead of letting the band do all the work. I still have those days when I get stuck and PB, but they are usually because I fail to follow the rules and that is when I reflect back and realize if the band was not there to stop me I would easily revert back to bad behaviors. I honestly think I have found my "sweet spot" I can eat what I am suppose to eat, I rarely feel hunger, and food is not my main thoughts. I do occasionally splurge and allow myself a treat of a miniature chocolate or 100 calorie snack. The difference is I count these in my total daily calorie count. Yes guys I am one of those OCD people that has to count calories, I realize some think we should not have to do this but, I still do not trust myself, or maybe it is not trust but the fact I know myself and I know how easy it is to say: oh, that little bite won't matter, and a couple of desserts later your pants are too tight. I know a lot of you are still struggling to get to the place where I am. Don't give up on your self, each and everyone of us is work the trials and tribulations that we are going through. Believe in your self, because if you don't believe in yourself you can not expect others to. Don't let small roadblocks or set backs take away your focus. We all have common ground, this is a life journey and not a vacation from food. This is us building confidence in ourselves and learning to trust our selves alone in a room with the "evil" that lives inside. We all have our own demons to fight and all of our journeys are individual, we can't compare ourselves to one another and we all have to hold each other accountable. I am approaching my 1 year anniversary next month and I so wanted to be at goal but I know that I will not be there. But you know what? That's OK. Seriously, it is! I am pleased with my progress and realize that I will get there. So, I guess what I have learned most of late, is I have changed. I have moved from Diane the closet eater to Diane the obsessive calorie counter. I have always read that when you give up one addiction you usually develop a new one, well thank you God my obsession is managing my weight loss. So for all of you out there that are still struggling to reach that place where you are happiest, remember the happiness may not always be found in a number you reach on the scale but a happiness from within yourselves.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

The earth moved slightly and so did the scale

Finally, i got on the scale this morning and they moved. down 1.5 lbs. I was so happy to see a new number. Then I went to work. Why do some people just have to burst your bubble. I was talking to a nurse and we were talking about losing weight and I said, I had been stuck at the same weight fo a while and was frustrated. She said,"You look amazing" I said, thank you. Then I was telling her about hurting my knee exercising and how worried I had been about not losing and afraid of gaining, so when the scales moved this morning and I was down 1.5 I was elated. She says well you know why don't you, you stopped exercising so you are losing muscle. Just what the blankty blank I need to hear. I know she is probably right but it sure did deflate my mood. Sighhhhh! The day ended well, I went to PT and was able to do the eliptical bike, 599 steps in 10 minutes. My balance sucks, the therapist told me I could use my WII Fit and do the balancing exercises and step exercises. Really low impact compared to what I was doing but I was excited. I decided I would stay positive and not let negative comments distroy my mood. "It is what it is" and right now it is slow going, but it is going. Another thing, not sure what is up with my stomach. I keep getting so bloated and so much gas, I know TMI but seriously, why all the gas. I had a few slices of granny smith apple yesterday and I though I was going to die. Seriously I was doubled over with pain and then later it feels like someone is ripping me open. thank you all for your support, I really appreciate all my lap band friends and all the info we share. I learn so much from reading others blogs. Have a great rest of the week bandsters.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Progress

Well Happy Monday! Just to let everyone know, I am making progress with my physical therapy on my knee. Today I started pool therapy and I actually was able to do steps leading with my right leg. Well of course this was in 4 foot of water but hey, I have been walking with crutches and my knee taped for 3 weeks now. So to me this is progress. I also made it through a whole day at work with out crutches, a limp because I am so afraid of falling but the knee did not buckel once today. The small things that make me happy these days. I still live in fear everyday of gaining weight, I log my food every day, it drives my husband crazy but I want to be sure I am eating right. I had another stuck episode tonight. I have had freguant episodes lately, almost daily something gets stuck. I was having a discussion with my husband tonight and he said he observed that I am going back to bad habits of eating to fast. He;s right, I used to watch the clock and make sure I was chewing every bite. Now I just want to finish when everyone else does, so I eat faster and usually that means I PB at least 1/4 of what I eat and sometimes it really hurts. I guess old habits die hard. Weight is still holding at 177. Hope everyone has a great week.    

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

MIA

Well gang I have been MIA for a while. busy with work and school. Just to update everyone, I am still on track but have had a little set back. On my journey to a healthy me, I had a little set back with my exercise routine. I selected curves as my gym because it had been such a long time since I had exercised and I wanted to start out slow, I lost 12.5 inches my first month and was so excited in my progress, I think I became a little obsessed with my progress and was attending the gym 4-5 times a week, well 2 weeks ago I went to work on a Friday like always and wham............... I started walking across the hospital campus and my knee went out, I tore my lateral meniscus, The past few weeks have been a serious bump in the road, no exercise and I am on crutches. I have to do 3 weeks of PT and than they will decide if I need surgery. I have no stability in the knee and with out the brace and crutches I end up on the floor. I have really been worried that I would gain weight and have obsessed over my calorie intake. I decided not to have my band tightened because I was exercising and maintaining my intake to the 1000-1200 calorie range. I had just finally gotten to the point I enjoyed eating again and not getting stuck. I monitor my calories on myfitnesspal.com but the not exercise is driving me nuts. I am stuck, still weighing in at 177. Hope everyone is doing good.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Hit a new set of numbers..Woo Hoo!

I am super excited today! I shared with everyone I started exercising 3 weeks ago, I joined Curves and dusted the treadmill off and started using it for something besides a clothes holder. I had been so frustrated because I had been stuck since after my last fill and unfill in May. I dropped immediately after my fill but than continued to hover in the 180's, lose a pound, gain a pound. I started logging everything I ate 10 days ago on myfitnesspal.com. I loaded the free app on my blackberry to make sure I would log every morsel I placed in my mouth. Well ladies and gentlemen, it paid off. I got weighed this morning at the gym and I am down to 179!!!!!!!! Woo Hoo, a new set of numbers, I am so super excited, I have been stuck in the 180's for 2 and a half months. I was so excited and motivated I started Power 90 the Original Version, Circuit 1-2 and 3-4 this evening. This is lower impact than P90x or Power 90 Master series but for me it is enough impact. I made it through the 35 minutes and didn't pass out or pull my back out. My husband walked in and said, "Honey please don't have a heart attach, your breathing awfully hard and sweating. I had to laugh. You guys don't know me but I'm a girlie girl and usually don't go out any where with out every hair in place and my make up on. So seeing me work out like this was blowing his mind. He thinks I have become a little OCD and maybe I have but dang it I didn't do all this (have the surgery) to not loss weight and get in shape. I want a healthier me and it is going to take more than just a lap band to get me there. To get to my goal weight of 138 I am going to have to really work at it and if that means I am obsessive, so be it. I really care what I put in my body these days, I have wasted a lot of time over the years abusing my self with fast food and junk. It is time I really took care of me, because I am worth it and I want this not so much to look good but to feel good. Today doing the Power 90, I could barely do jumping jacks, now come on who can't do jumping jacks? My legs felt like two lead pipes and it took everything I had to move it, and balance, OMG.. I think I have the coordination and the balance of a 90 year old. My WII fit tells me all the time I need to work on my center of gravity, seriously! I hate it when a dang computer soft ware program is such a smart A$$, but honestly it is correct, my balance sucks. So here is hoping that I improve my coordination and tone a little doing this, now I don't think I will ever have 6 pack abs. (lol) but at least maybe I can stretch my thighs without hanging onto a chair. I am sooooo glad I did this circuit in the privacy of my own home so no one could see how bad I was, but I think I get "A" for effort. I get my measurements done on the 27th of July I can't wait to see how many inches I have lost since I started working out, I know I have lost some because my shorts are lose in the thighs and waist and my bras are too big again. Dang it I really wish I could keep the boobs, I have more fat on my booty and wish it would come off first. Do you think I could have the fat from my butt sucked out and injected in my boobs than I would be pretty equal. (Just a suggestion) Signing off, have a great week everyone!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Keeping up the pace

Happy Saturday bloggers! Hope everyone had a great week and did one thing for themselves this week. I have worked my "buns" off this week at Curves and on my treadmill. In the past week I have exercised 30 minutes every day and burned a total of 1830 calories. I have lost 1.4 lbs and a total of 8" in the past two weeks. It was so hard for me to get motivated over the past 8 months to exercise as usual I wish I had got off my butt sooner and started. Some mornings I do not want to roll my body out of bed but I do and it is paying off. So happy with the results so far.   Tonight we are going out to dinner with friends to celebrate her 40th birthday. She is a gastric sleeve patient, about 2 months post op and has lost 30 lbs. We are going to a dinner theater. Looking forward to the evening with friends but always stress over what to eat. One good thing we can share a meal. Have a good weekend everyone and keep up the good work, remember we are all on a journey taking it one day at a time.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Keeping a Commitment to Yourself!

Hi, everyone! Hope everyone had a great weekend and is doing well on this beautiful, hot summer day. This past weekend I have been doing a lot of soul searching about commitment and why I seem to be stuck for the past month when I felt I was doing everything right. The first 6-7 months after surgery I did well with my weight loss, I lost 1-2 lbs per week, had 2 fills, 1 unfill. I failed to exercise regularly as my doctor told me because I was not motivated, so basically the weight in the beginning dropped at a fast rate. But I weighted 248 lbs, 5'1" tall. (check out my photos I was quite the little butter ball) I ate around 800-1000 calories a day and tracked what I ate. I used the lap band web site, watched the videos, logged my foods, read everything I could get my hands on and participated in the forums. I was committed. I thought. Then I got comfortable, I looked better, felt better,and like I said things were going well. Then the weight slowed down, but I was still losing, so I started using the expensive treadmill I bought for Christmas, 2 or 3 days a week. I had pretty good restriction after my first fill, I had too much restriction with my second fill and they removed less than .4 of a cc. Some days I feel restricted, some days I can eat what ever I want. So over the past few weeks I asked myself, " Diane are your really committed to this journey, are you in it for the long haul" Boy is that an eye opening question. My answer is yes! So I had to recommit to why I started this journey, I look a lot better now, but seriously, I am still obese. Just not as obese as I was 8 months ago. I can wear a size 14 but a size 14 today is probably not what a size 14 was years ago. Let's face it guys as a society we have all gotten larger and so the designers have made the sizes fuller to growwwwwwww, with us. Sorry just a little play on words there. But honestly, I was fat so I feel I have the right to talk about myself and have an opinion. So how do I make sure I can keep this commitment to myself, because honestly in the past at about this time I start getting Bord with things and fat Diane would seem to resurface. I cannot let this happen this time, or maybe I should say I WILL not allow this to happen this time. So this is what I did this weekend to try and figure out why I seem to be sorta stuck, lose a pound, gain a pound, loss two pounds, gain one pound, loss nothing. What I committed to a month ago. 1. 2 weeks ago I joined curves, and I am proud to say I have went 4 days a week since I started. I got my curve smart key today and boy I thought I had been working out, well now I am really working out. 2. I committed to blogging and being honest with all of you, I have kept that commitment also, I make every attempt to blog my feelings at least weekly and I read the other blogs and comment to lend encouragement and honesty to others. Many of you have encouraged me, some directly and some indirectly. I find even though I have never met any of you formally, we all share so many experiences and we can learn so much form each others successes and failures. 3. I committed to writing down all of my food and not snacking between meals," the graze thing" boy I think this has been the hardest. I tired using the lap band web site to record and this wasn't working well for me, when I was at work I would write my food down and try and log it to the web site in the evenings. I wasn't always consistent. I had post it notes all over my office with bits of info on them of what I had eaten daily. I tried drinking protein for breakfast, no between meal snacks, increasing my protein, watching my carbs, looking at my fats, etc, etc. I thought about getting a fill so I would eat less, but realized over the 4th, I may not have total restriction but I was not listening to my band. I had fallen into the crutch of wanting my band to do the work not me. Now let;s face it guys, I loved food, I love to cook, I love to eat because no one gets as big as I did by just cheating a little. Seriously! Sorry for digressing. Like I said logging the food on the lap band site was not working well for me so by reading the forums' blogs and internet searches I found some answers I am going to try. Saturday, I did a lot of Internet searches; How many calories should a lap band patient eat?, How much protein should a lap band patient eat? How many carbohydrates should a lap band patient eat? How many calories do I need to decrease to lose 1 lbs a week? How many fewer calories do I need to eat to lose 2 pounds a week? What drives the metabolism, How do you jump start your metabolism? I am not sure but I am sure I did a few more I have forgot about by now. So what did I find, lots and lots of information. So what now? I think the best site I found, was right here on our own blogs. www.myfitnesspal.com The site is free, you plug in your height, weight and your life style. (Now be honest about the life style) You can tweak the protein to what we should eat, and there is a mobile application that you can use on your droid, I-phone, I-touch or blackberry. It is free, it will allow you to add stuff that isn't in the data base, build a recipe and calculate your servings. It tells you how much you should loss based on what you eat and exercise. Honestly, not sure what the long term result will be but it will also allow me to run a report I can take to my nutritionist for her to evaluate at my next visit. It adds your exercise points back in but I have decided to eat these for now to see how the next few weeks go. So what have I learned about myself over the past 72 hours, I am OCD big time. But I need to be OCD or I will never make it for the long haul. I have to hold myself accountable, I can not expect anyone else to do that for me. I can not lie to my self and I can not expect the band to do all the hard work. Some of the work is changing my own thought process about food and how I cope with life. Do I have restriction, yes if I listen to my band and to what I was taught. Eat off a small plate, cut my food into bite size pieces, chew each piece 20-30 times, lay my fork down between bites, eat at the dinner table NOT in front of the TV. If I finish my food under 20 minutes give my brain time to catch up with my stomach oh and lastly make healthy food choices and eat protein first. Now if I do all of those things I do have restriction and I am satisfied for 3-4 hours. Question is, do I feel full? The answer to that is no, but I feel satisfied with what I eat. I still measure all my food, eating 2-3 ozs. of protein at each meal, learning that a serving of vegetables is really 1/2 cup except lettuce of course. I will probably measure my food for the rest of my life because obviously I do not understand serving sizes.   So guys I challenge all of you to commit to your self. Think about why you did this, it should have been for you. You are the only person you have to be honest with, you are the only person who knows what you put in your mouth everyday. You are the only one who really can answer the question."ARE YOU REALLY COMMITTED TO THE LONG HAUL?" We will have good days, great days, bad days and totally sucky days? We will lose weight, we will gain weight, we will stay neutral but what matters most is our honesty to ourselves and our commitment to change how we use food, how we think about food and taking this one day at a time.I am committed or maybe I need to be committed some days I am not sure but I will say, I am so glad I had the surgery, I am thankful for this support forum and last but not least I LovetheNewMe! Have a great week and believe in yourself because "YOU" are worth it!   Edit note: (p.s. I learned by logging my food that I may not be eating enough consistently and maybe my body is going into starvation mode. I will keep you posted if I lose anything over the next week. I started tracking every morsel on Saturday the 9th of July. So crossing my fingers ) Try out the web site it is pretty neat and I got the idea from reading one of our blogs. :iloveuall:

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Checking In on Reality

Well hope everyone had a wonderful 4th of July! I had the wonderful opportunity to spend the weekend with my three beautiful grandchildren and daughter. It was so great to have the energy to keep up with a 5, 7 and 12 year old. We spent the days in the pool and evenings playing in the yard. We had a cook out on the 4th and than went DT to watch the fireworks and get our faces painted. I don't think I could have asked for a better holiday weekend. Oh and I lost 2 lbs. Even with company here I managed to stay true to my new eating behaviors. I decided to cook what I could eat and daily went out and bought snacks for the kids so they were not sitting around the house. My husband did bring chips into the house for the kids on the 4th and I must say they have always been my weakness and still are and when they left on Tuesday I sent them packing out the door. I really can't trust myself because I knew I would eat them and why have the temptation so close at hand. I also sent all the mini cheese cakes and potato salad. My daughter brought her Pilate's bands and taught me some new strengthening exercise so I could do some more toning at home on my legs and arms. I know I will probably not be able to tighten up all the shrinkles but every little bit helps. I have managed to make it to Curves 4 days a week since starting but still have not got my exercise heart rate up to the 70% they want me to, but I can tell a difference in my energy level. Tonight I got on the WII to weigh myself and was surprised to have lost 2 lbs in the last 9 days. I have been trying hard to stick to 3 meals a day, writing down everything I eat and trying to not do the shakes and bars and eat real food for all my meals. Believe me making myself eat solids for all meals is hard, and requires a lot more planning. I got all of my labs back several weeks ago and my HDL was not high enough and my LDL was too high. So increase the exercise, increase the fiber(and this is very hard). When I got on the scales tonight I am not sure what I would have done if I would have stayed the same. I read and read and everything I read says I have lost above average but when you do everything right you want a reward and my reward has been that number dropping. Sometimes I feel I become fixated with the numbers and so need to refocus myself on the fact that this is a journey and everyday that I make a positive change in my life it is a change in the right direction. I think I have finally realized that the next 30-40lbs is going to be slow and steady. I am not the most patient person, and I really thrive on instant gratification, who of us doesn't? I spend time ever evening reading the blogs because it helps me stay focused, I read the success and the struggles.(I don't like to call them failures because I believe we are all trying to be successful and some do it quicker than others. I try not to compare myself with others because all of our bodies respond differently. Learning from others like us is our key to our success.   I had a friend at work who had the band several months ago and she was struggling with getting to her sweet spot and was struggling with not losing. She told me that she had to distance herself from me because it made her feel bad that she was not losing and I was. But she said what helped her most was staying in therapy with the psychologist and getting her head straight. I think sometimes that is something we all struggle with, we had the surgery, we try hard to eat right but we struggle with demons off and on whether we admit it or not. I went to one of the support group sessions a couple of weeks ago and it was sort of a b***h session for a lot. I heard a lot of people blaming the physician and the navigator for them not knowing or understanding something. I sat there and listened and finally thought, how can we hold others to blame for our inability to lose weight. My doctor made it very clear to me, no guarantees, this was a tool and only a tool and the work was up to me. Let's face it I am really good at lying to myself and talking myself into believing that just one bite won't hurt. ( Just like the fish sandwich and biggie Fry's I used to eat on the way home from work as my first dinner, it didn't count because me and the server were the only witness to my act) I work daily on holding myself accountable, it is my responsibility to listen to my body and inform my doctor if something isn't working but first it is my responsibility to follow the rules. (NONE of this is easy, if it was easy I could have done it without the help of lap band, RIGHT!)   When I got my lab work back, I was disappointed. I thought, I make healthy food choices what else do they want? The nutritionist said, add more fiber and vegetables. I said how in the H%$# am I suppose to do that when I can only eat so much at a meal and I need to focus on protein. She said, eat legumes, oatmeal, nuts, flaxseed. Oh, I said legumes are protein, duhhhh! And EXERCISE, oh that dreaded word. How many of us thought all we had to do was have the surgery and the band would do all the work. How did that work out for everyone, not that good huh! I think I said this in another blog but I had always thought weight loss surgery was a cop out but boy have I changed my mind. This has been one of the most life changing things that I have ever done. For me my lap band forces me to make healthy choices. I am not just paying a fee to WW to get weighed weekly, I altered my body, I had surgery, I put a limit on my choices of what to eat and eating now requires a lot of thought and planning. So lap band bloggers, yes losing weight is what we all hope to achieve but should that be our only focus? Maybe our focus should be on dealing with changing all the learned bad behaviors we have developed over the years and lap band surgery alone will not change those behaviors or those feelings. I constantly find myself checking in with myself because it is so easy to lose one bad behavior and pick up a new one. It is so hard to hold yourself accountable, so hard not to convince yourself to take just one bite, so hard not to slide back to bad habits with just ONE bite! I don't know how to cope unless I just cut them out of my life. But that seems so final and cold. Should we deprive ourselves of the things we love, until I learn control, for me that will be a yes and maybe will always be a yes. Does an alcoholic ever stop being an alcoholic, NO. Does a drug addict every find a time when they can have just one fix, NO. Will I ever be able to be alone in a room with a bag or bowl of chips. I doubt it! My journey will be full of peaks and valleys. I will have successes and I will have back slides. I will work daily to hold myself accountable for my actions and to be honest with myself. Because honestly I am the only person I ever lied to, everyone else could see what I had done to myself and now you know too.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Motivation

Thought I would update everyone on my progress with exercise. I have gotten up everyday since last Thursday and I am up at 5am and exercising by 7am. Cardio with muscle strengthen 3 days a week and walking 3 days a week. Sunday's off to lounge by the pool and give the muscles a little break. My knees are holding up pretty good, the squats are a little difficult but I am hanging in there. I had no idea how our of shape I really was. Today I finally got my heart rate up to target zone so I was getting the max effect from the exercise. I think I am using muscles I forgot I had. i can really feel the burn tonight, when I raise my arms above my head. I guess the old saying of no pain, no gain is true. I made the mistake of weighing this morning after I showered. Weight still the same, no gain, no loss. I have religiously been writing down every morsel I stick in my pretty little mouth, average of about 900 calories a day and 60 gms of protein. Sticking to the 3 meals a day and in the evenings I have 1 cup popcorn for the fiber or 1 oz nuts for protein. Staying witiin my calorie count and servings. I guess my body is just comfortable with this weight but I'm not. So girls and boys let't get movin, movin, movin. We can all make this happen!    

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Panties and other things

I will apologize to the guys for this topic up front.   Now I am going to warn all of you male bloggers I am going to discuss a rather x-rated topic. My panties! lol Well yesterday I finally broke down and bought my self some new underware. I know your all asking how in the world was she still waring the same panties she wore 68 lbs ago. They were a little baggy in the seat but they were dear old friends and I just wasn't ready to go to the expense of purchasing new ones. I have had to purchase new bras, on two separate occasions but the panties worked so I left them alone. Well for two weeks I have been saying to my husband, "Honey I gotta buy new panties, one day I am going to be walking down the hall at work and they are going to fall right off." It had got to the point when I wore my tee shirt spanks that my underware gave me a wedgy. TMI right but you have to fully appreciate how much our bodies change and all of the things we go through when losing weight. Well I bought two pair of really cute hipster style panties at Target. They were so cute, "Not granny panties at all" They were a soft gray pattern with this cute little bow on the front and flat ecru colored lace on the legs. And guess what they are a size "7" and they look so cute. Ok, so they are only underware and I know I am the only one that is going to see them but they make me feel thinner. I know that may sound ridiculous but they do. I have not bought underware that was not of the granny pantie style for years, I got satin ones, lacy ones, etc.   Tomorrow, Monday June 27th I start my exercise at Curves®. I have to be there at 7am, so excited. Spent the weekend working in the yard and swimming in the pool. Also bought some delicious protein bars at CVS for buy two get one free. Had a yummy pretzel peanut butter one yesterday for lunch and a chocolate Carmel crunch one today. 200 cal 15 gm protein and low carbs. I like these on the weekend for when I am busy outside and use as one meal replacement.   Hope everyone is doing great this weekend. I will keep you posted this week on my exercise, oh and I guess I get to wear my new panties to work and won't get a wedgy!

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Today is a new Beginning

Well I did it! Today I made a commitment to exercise daily! :Dancing_wub: Yes you heard me right I finally got off my butt and made a full fledge commitment to exercise 30 minutes every day. So what was my motivation. Thank you Judy Jones. I read your blog the other night about you losing 59 pounds but had never been committed to exercise. I was right there with you, I have exercised off and on but never completely committed to doing the deed. For Christmas I bought myself a treadmill and have used it off and on, I have a gazelle, it makes a nice clothes hanger in the spare room. But I have just not had the drive and motivation to be consistent. So you ask why now, well it is a short story. Our insurance rates are going up at work, starting in September. To get 800 dollars back on our annually premiums we were required to do a health assessment with employee health. Well, even though I have dropped from 248 to 180 I am still OBESE! What an ugly word, but it didn't sit well with me. My total cholesterol was 196, my HDL is only 47 and my ratio was 4.7. Well that was a slap in the face, I eat healthy, I eat around 900 to 1000 calories a day, 60-80 gms of protein, I take my vitamins religiously, I drink all my water, I write my food down and I don't cheat. I count every morsel I put in my mouth. So what is left. EXERCISE! Stop being a couch potato :behindsofa: in the evenings, get off your ass and EXERCISE!!!! Sorry to curse but I need to get motivated and being the stubborn Italian I am sometimes, stupid has to slap me in the face. So today, I joined Curves, made the appointment this morning for 3pm, did my measurements, signed up and made my commitment and first 6 appointments. I am so excited and pumped this evening. You see I am one of those people who does better with goals, especially if I am PAYING for them. I spend all that money on exercise equipment but there is nothing that pushes me. Obviously if I could do things on my own I would never have gotten OBESE or had weight loss surgery. I also joined with a friend, so we made a commitment together. She had gastric bypass 18 months ago and has lost 135 lbs, needs to lose another 25 but is stuck. We both figured if we did this together we would keep each other motivated. When they did my assessment they asked me what size I wanted to be, I said a size 10. Boy did I pick a lofty goal, I am 5'1" 55 years old and that makes me need to lose 52 to 53 inches and about that many pounds to reach this goal. That would put my weight at about 128-130. I am not real sure about that goal, it may be a bit lofty for me but just to set a goal and make a commitment to myself and now all of you know so I have to be accountable to myself and the entire lap band community because everyone is watching now. I had to laugh, she said, "How do you feel about your thighs?" I had to laugh, then I said, "Well there a little chubby right now and I would like for them to stop jiggling." My thighs measure 27" each and I set my goal for 24-25 inches. All of my life I have been called "Thunder Thighs" Well Ms. Thunder Thighs is going for the gold. I will keep you in the loop, I start on Monday at 7am, my friend Janet and I decided to exercise , 3 days a week before work and 2 days a week after work and on Saturdays we will do mornings. Sundays will be on our own to commit to some type of exercise, yard work, house work, bike riding, swimming or using one of the two exercise machines I own. Dr. Anderson would be so proud of me!:Banane43:

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Blogging

I have spent the past hour or so reading blogs and catching up on the lap band community. As I was reading it came to me that we have all been given a wonderful opportunity to have the support of thousands of people. People like us, who can over advice from first hand experience and learn from all of our successes and failures. I never introduced myself when I started blogging, I just started pounding away spilling my thoughts and feelings on the page. So her goes, my name is Diane, I am 55 almost 56 this November. I am married, have two children, a boy and a girl and 3 grand children, a dog, Lexi ( She is posted with me in my picture) and a cat, Sassey. I love animals and if I lived in the country would have many more than I do, animals love us unconditionally and don't care if we are fat or thin. How and why did I chose lap band? I have been what you call the professional diet queen. I am 5'1" and have struggled with weight gain after the birth of my first child in the late 70's. I lost the weight and just gained it back with the birth of my second child. I lost that weight and did pretty good until I went to nursing school and packed it right back on. In those early years I could keep it around 180 or 190 but still thought I was fat, but I never realized what fat was until I hit my 40's. That is when I really started to plump up, I reached a high by the time I was 50 of 260's and believe me on a 5'1" frame that is a lot of weight and my knees began to tell the story a few years ago. Three years ago my right knee went out, swollen, painful, difficult to walk, etc. I went to the doctor, they x-rayed and MRI. I had some beginning stages of osteo, thinning of the cartilage on the inner part of my knee joint. The doctor injected with steroids, last about 48 hours and then I did the weekly injections to rebuild the cartilage. It puts the cushion back between the joints. That lasted about 8 weeks. Then the dreaded conversation came up, Diane you need to drop a few pounds. I knew this already, I had two bouts of pneumonia over the past two years, my BP was out of control, and I was having sleep apnea. Oh by the way I forgot to mention I have been a nurse for almost 30 years. You would think as a health care worker we would have better health habits. But no, we probably are one of the most unhealthy group of people because we are always taking care of others and not ourselves. I am very stubborn, duh so I refused to wear a CPAP for the sleep apnea, and when I saw the metal they would put in my body as a joint, I said no way. Off to Jenny Craig I marched, I joined for 500 dollars, bought my meals at 120 plus a week and lost down to 195 lbs. Then it became too expensive and I just knew I could do this on my own, portion control and 1200 calories, a piece of cake I thought. NOT!!!!!!!!!!! I plumped back up to 248 lbs within 2 years of stopping Jenny Craig. So that is how I got to lap band. Live a life of pain and not enjoy life or get off your butt and do something about it. As for the nursing, I am a critical care nurse, so you would think I would know better and make better choices. Oh well that is the past and this is the new me. I involved my family in my journey, I made my appointment for the information meeting and took my husband with me and told all of my family. I figured if I was going to make this a life style I better include the persons in my life so they could be supportive. I thought about not telling the people at work, because sadly I was one of those people who thought weight loss surgery was a cop out. Boy have I changed my mind. so once I scheduled my surgery I told all of my peers at work I was having Lap Band surgery on the 28th of October. Now a very good friend of mine at work, Ron, looked at me shocked and said" your not fat enough to have weight loss surgery." I could have kissed him but instead, I stopped and said, "Ron, I am morbidly obese. My BMI is 47.5. I have to lose weight or I am not going to get to enjoy watching my grandchildren grow up. He looked shocked and said, I had no idea you weighed that much. Thank god for the Ron's and the Paul's(my husband) who love us whether we are skinny or fat and see us for something more than how we look. I will tell you I was scared, I think my biggest fear has been that I will fail, fail to loss and keep it off. But that very fear is my driving force, I will not gain this weight back and I will be successful. The difference for me know compared to back in the dieting days is I am choosing to change my life style with a gentle nudge from my band. I always lost weight on the planned programs I paid for, Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, South Beach etc. But when I stopped paying I gained the weight back. Lap Band is a permanent solution to me because as long as i listen to my band, make healthy choices and exercise I will be successful. I know a lot of people struggle with weight loss and the band but in my opinion we fail because we fail to change our behavior. When I don't lose weight now, i sit down and look back at what I am doing. If I am honest with myself, I am snacking between meals, eating past satisfied and not exercising. I chose not to eat sweets, potato chips(which I love), I stay way from carbohydrates, pasta, rice and potato's. Not because I can't have them but because I like them to much and they make me feel over stuffed. I love pizza, can I eat pizza yes, should I eat pizza no. It is full of carbohydrates, so I look for alternatives that satisfy that void. This truly is a journey and you learn about your body and your inner self along the way. For me this journey is not about being skinny it is about learning to make the right choices, developing a healthy life style and spending quality time with my family. So now you no my story. I was banded October 28, 2010. I weighed in at 248 on surgery day and as of today I weigh 180. ( I have been stuck here for several weeks) I started in a size 24 and now wear a size 14. I have lots of shrinkels but who cares, I consider those my battle scars.

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

 

Obstacles

I hate busy days, meetings start at 7am and go until 5pm. Not even a minute to take a pee break, I try to tell my assistant to schedule that in but some days it just does not work out. I have been home for 3 hours and I am still dealing with issues. Knowing it was going to be a busy day, I powered up this morning with a skinny latte from star bucks and added my 24 grams of protein powder to it. Total of 35 grams of protein that took be about 2 and half hours to drink. But it was yummy, I call it my high octane drink that carries me through a busy day, I consider it a treat. I did manage to squeeze in a small salad with some chicken and blue cheese but for dinner, not so well. I had a cup of popcorn and 4 ozs of white wine. OK, I know that is not in the any of our books but I just was too tired to cook, and as you all know fast food just does not work. i did sprinkle a tablespoon of Parmesan cheese on it, does that count and it was air popcorn. I guess I feel guilty, maybe I should run around the block a few times. I used to keep a few frozen dinners in the freezer for nights like this but my MD said, "Diane, frozen dinners have way too much sodium. Wonder what he would say about the 100 calorie pop secret and wine. Hey I just realized now why they call it pop secret, you can eat it and keep it a secret. I think they may call that stinkin thinkin, what do you all think? So this is my confession for the night, I ate a bad dinner, I feel guilty, my stomach feels like crap and I know by 10pm I will be hungry. I will tell you one difference in the old me and the new me, the old me would have never thought a thing about what they ate and ate another meal on top of the one she just ate. I would have felt a twinge of regret but would have never looked back. Thank you all for listening and be my second conscious. It's great to have others who understand how you really feel some days and you don't have to apologize for not being perfect. Hope everyone has a great weekend.   To end on a happy note, I wore my second new dress today and I looked good.......................................    

♥LovetheNewMe♥

♥LovetheNewMe♥

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