And my husband is being an idiot. Why? Because he's a man!

For like a year now he was wanted to buy me something (we'll call it "the thing") that I don't really want. Well - it's one of those "would be nice to have" kinds of things that I would want if I had the time to use it, but I simply don't, and won't until I'm done with my graduate program (end of this year). And it's not a cheap thing, so in the meantime it would just be sitting there collecting dust. He has used every single holiday, any type of occasion, etc. to try and justify buying me "the thing". For some reason he really wants me to have it. That is probably a combination of trying to encourage my interests and support me, and him wanting it too. He tried to buy it for me for xmas, he tried to buy it for me because I got an "A" in a class, he tried to buy it for me because I was having a bad week, etc.

My husband asked me what I want for my bday and I told him, and I think it went in one ear and out the other because he has been hinting that I'm getting "the thing". Two days ago he was hinting about it and I said, "I don't want it right now, I won't have the time to use it" and he says "Well I'll use it..." Men!

And - my husband really isn't a clever guy. He's exceptionally intelligent, don't get me wrong, but he is not witty/crafty in the way it takes to deceive someone, so I doubt he's focusing his efforts on "the thing" to try and lead me away from what he's really getting me. He's really not even the type to think about doing something like that, let alone be able to pull it off.

And my husband does not have a romantic bone in his body. The most romantic thing he has done was plan a dinner for our 10th anniversary, it was a "package" deal that he made some adjustments to so kudos on the adjustments, but -- really? And I truly think that he got the "bragging rights" from that more than pleasure at having done a good job. His friends knew about it way before I did - "Oh yeah, he's been talking about it non-stop... about how good of a job he did."

Here's an example of my husband's "romance." Because of the happenstance of my birthday, we're somehow limited to flowers, candy and jewelry as potential gifts. Well, I don't like getting flowers. I'm way too practical for that. They're expensive, roses in particular are (IMO) not that pretty, I don't care for their scent, and they all just die (yet somehow they're supposed to be a symbol of our LOVE?), so don't waste your money. And I'm not a big candy eater, especially now, and have never been a fan of chocolate. So he usually goes with jewelry, which is ok, but I'm not a big jewelry person. I always wear the same things - same hoops, same studs, same rings. My husband's idea of a "romatic" gift is to drive me to the jewelry store (always the stupid chain store at the mall, to boot) and say "pick something." Umm... what? What am I going to pick? I already have what I want, and even if I did want something else, I would want you to be at least a little bit involved, but this crap -- is no different than me just going somewhere and getting it on my own.

Now, because he has been (I'm sure) planning on buying me "the thing" and I've hopefully made it abundantly clear that I don't want it right now, I will probably either:

1) be guilt-tripped into letting him buy it for me

2) give up and tell him I want it because that's easier than dealing with man pout

2) get nothing because he's not the type to have a plan B

Getting nothing wouldn't bother me, except for the fact that it would be because he's a dill head.

I'm thinking - a camera is only good if you're giving me a sex toy, and then we can... nevermind.

I wish I could do massages. I have a group of girlfriends who do a monthly massage club thing at one of the spas here, and they keep bugging me to go but I don't like people touching my fat.

But I may have scored anyway. He just emailed me that he wants to up the visits from our housekeeper. That's a win-win, right? Twice the visits from her is half the work for me, somehow in math land...

Happy Birthday Wheetsin!!!1

Happy Bday Wheetsin. I loved the idea of wrapping it up and giving it to him for his Bday. It's clear he wants it. Actually he sounds like a dear man. My ex celebrated all the birthdays in the family...in fact in the state of Wi, sitting in the local bar getting sloshed.

Happy Bday W!

I too thought it must be a treadmill or exercise equipment! Men can be such dunderheads! At least a camera is better than some of the other tchotchkes one can get. Plus I just wanted an excuse to use the word tchotchke.

*ducking* most men are clueless- either that or they have such genius with expectation managment and keeping the bar low that it boggles the mind. I personally refer to Valentine's Day as BLACK THURSDAY. So enjoy your birthday and everyone else- happy Black Thursday!!

I can't get into discussions about spousal gift-giving because it always sounds like I'm gloating. (My husband gets it, and always seems to hit the mark. I am a total lame-o in response.)

But HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WHEETSIN!!!!! Love ya!

Happy birthday!

I have to tell you...that is a BEAUTIFUL camera...dh is a photographer and it is a beauty!!!

That being said...if it's not what you want...then it could be the BEST and it wouldn't matter.

Our first Christmas together...dh kept going on and on about the amazing present he bought for me....I was going to love it...he was so excited to give it to me. etc...

All December I could hardly contain myself. I was thinking beautiful diamond earrings to match my beautiful wedding band...or perhaps a nice bracelet...or a spa day... I waited with anticipation until all of the presents were done being unwrapped and dh went to the bedroom to get the one he "forgot..."

It was very large...not a tiny jewelry box at all.

It was............a portable easel. complete with dry erase markers, pads and a carrying case.

I cried and cried and cried and got a spa weekend.

Poor dh has never lived it down.

I hear ya girlfriend...I'm married to him as well.

Happy Birthday.

Rain

Happy Birthday Wheetsin! I hope that you get pleasantly surprised by your DH and he holds off on purchasing the camera. But regardless, wishing you a happy birthday and a great year.

Happy Birthday and Happy Valentine's Day Wheetsin!!!

happy birthday.

I didn't mean to be so secretive about "the thing" - it's not secretive at all. I just keep thinking of it as that. (I *wish* it was a sex toy!!)

LMAO...

It's this camera.

whoa - amazing camera... but i agree with Rain ( i think it was Rain forgive me if not, too tired to double check ) it could be the best thing in the world and if you didnt really want it ... ehhh, not so much.

Happy Birthday! I hope it was a great one!

I can relate. My B-day was Wednesday. My DH and I were both sick. He bought me some flowers from Kroger. When I said something about it he got me a Starbucks card!??? WTF a Starbucks card? All I wanted was a birdbath warmer. They only cost $30.00. I hate to sound like a selfish brat, but a starbucks card!

JP

So, the big question now is, what "the thing" the camera or something else???

Sorry, haven't been around lately. "The Thing" is definitely the camera. It always is. Anytime he alludes to wanting to buy me something, I KNOW it's the camera.

So my husband usually leaves work around 3:30. I made sure to be home by 3:45 so that if he had dinner plans involving anything special I'd have time to change & get ready. He doesn't get home until like 4:30 so I know right away that he has gone somewhere between work and home. And I hear a bag crinkling when he walks in, and he won't let me downstairs. Then I see it's a Wal-Mart bag. The camera would have been #1 bad gift, and I think anything from Wal-Mart has to be #2.

So I end up getting:

* Birthday card

* Birthday card

* Valentine's day card

* "Just because" card

(Rather than have to try and write his feelings, my husband tends to just buy as many cards as it takes to feel they will adequately express himself for him).

And...

* A huge bag of Reese's pieces (because I'm trying to lose weight and all)

* A paperback book

So (phew) I didn't get the camera, nor did I get anything worth sharing. Such is life with my husband during any special occasion.

I hope that is the best book you ever read!!!!!