Donali inspired me to start this new thread. She has been providing information to us regarding Morbid Obesity being a disease, which is a very powerful topic for all of us.

Lately I've been discovering that there are many different categories that we fit in, so I was wondering what category you are in. I don't have labels for the categories, but let me start by telling you why I am obese.

First, my family history includes severe mental illness (Mom, aunt, etc.) I inherited a branch of mental illness - Generalized Anxiety Disorder, which had me extremely ill in my youth. My panic attacks have been under control for years, but I still have many anxiety-related problems, one being that I never stop thinking, and at night, the thoughts are consumed by food. Part of the reason I'm obese is becaseu I can't fight the mental struggle to eat for long periods of time. That part of my brain is stronger than the sensible part.

But my biggest problem is portion control. I'm obsessed by enormous quantities of food. I simply don't understand how anyone could order just one taco, or have a small serving of anything. With me, it's all or nothing. I would rather fast all day than to eat one chicken thigh. It's torture. A half gallon of ice cream is two servings. A family dinner is two servings.

And mine is all a night time disorder. Someone baked us fresh Cookies, all warm and steamy, and I didn't even look at them. I don't give a damn about food during the day. I feel like a monster.

I'm fat because...

As a kid, I was pretty active. I rollerbladed, figure skated, played tennis, horseback riding, gymnastics, etc... When I hit my teenage years, I become severely clinically depressed. I lost all desire and motivation to be active. I blew off all friendships. Food became my friend. I ate for all reasons and didn't get any exercise.

My depression ended in 2004, but I'm now stuck with the eating and exercise habits I had previously. I'm fat and it hurts to exercise, so I don't. And I'm constantly hungry from eating large portions and poor quality/high calorie foods. And feeling so bad about myself and ashamed just makes me want to eat more and exercise less.

Plus, mix that with being able to drive to McDonalds. Or not having time to grocery shop because I work two jobs and go to school.

I am fat .....

I wasn't always fat. In high school I was really skinny, active and felt amazing. Then one day I passed out. Just out like a light....when I came to, my chest was killing me and I was freezing. Ambulance called and doctors seen, it was discovered that I had a condition called "Vasodepressorsincopy" a.k.a. abnormality in the reagulation of my blood pressure causing my heart to off be and as a result my blood pressure would plumit, my heart would start to pump harder to compincate and it would be lights out. I was 15 when that happened. I was put on a medication for a long periode of time that as a side affect would cause weight gain. (wasn't told about that until 60 pounds or so gained) The aslo took away ALL physical activity for 2 years until docs were sure that was the problem. I couldn't even walk a golf course! Well you put thoes to things together alone with depression and vwalla FAT!

Now I have also developed fibromialgya so not only am I fat now but I feel like someone took a baseball bat to every inch of my body. I feel brused everywere but nobody can see the bruses....my joints hurt and my muscles feel like they have been threw the workout of 10 olypians!

But no longer! I am having my surgery in October of this year and I WILL lose the weight. It wont fix the FMS...I will have that for the rest of my life but I will lighten the pain by loseing the weight.

CMS, I hope you have done lots of research and know for certain that the lapband is the proper step for you to take. Have you even considered the sleeve? I hope you will not only look at the early results that most people have when they get different surgical procedures, but that you will make sure you know about the long-term weight loss or re-gaining of weight percentages.

I've had the band for almost 3 years and although I had a modicum of success, the longer I have the thing, the more difficult it is to keep the weight off - you know, just like in real life without the band.

I have arthritis although not as bad as your fibromyalgia, but I am not able to run or do any exercises that put pressure on my knees. Without good regular exercise, most people do not have the success with the band that they'd hoped. At least not when you are an older bandster.

BJean, I have done some resurch on the sleeve and to be honest it kinda scares me, however im not sure why. Same with the bypass....I just doesnt feel right for me if you know what I mean. I have been looking into this for quite some time and really do think that this is the way to go. I do so thank you for the advice and suggestions. I have consider them all. Thanks so much again.

I'm fat because even if I woke up at 10am and ate, if it was 12pm I'd eat lunch and then 6pm I would eat dinner even if I wasn't hungry. My portion sizes where ridiculous and overall my doctors where the result of my weight gain. I've been on prednisone on and off since I was 10 and anyone that's been on it knows that a side affect is weight gain. I was one of those unlucky ones. I'm not saying that the doctors are to blame overall for my weight gain but most of it is - And they even acknowledge that.

Lack of portion control!

Edited June 26, 200917 yr by bandarama
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Well I was always on the heavy side....but not ever as fat as I am now... In high school I was actualy very thin... and since I am tall I looked even thinner than what I actualy was. The smallest size I have used in my adult years was a size 10 weighing 156 lbs.

When I got married and Fell in a HORRIBLE DEPRESSION.(why I dont know) To top it all off I was always a BORED EATER.

Every time I am Bored I eat.... My family is also very into MEXICAN COOKING! That did not help growing up!FATTY,FATTY, FATTY!!!!

Depression is Gone and I am keeping Myself busy so I wont be bored any more! Now that I am married I CONTROL the Menu at home!!!

I think I was fat because food was my everything! I ate when I was happy,I ate when I was sad,I ate when I was bored!! I just ate,ate,ate!! I would eat till I couldn't eat anymore..I would scare myself sometimes!! That is one of the things I love about the band is the control that it FORCES you to have!!It's soo nice to not have food control me anymore...makes me feel free!! I had a psychic tell me that I ate to build a barrier of protection around me so no-one or nothing could hurt me...very interesting!!

ChanginMyStars, I agree that the sleeve looks scary. It is one of those irreversible ways to solve the problem.

I haven't given up on the band yet, but I am discouraged. I just got another fill and hopefully, between that and my getting my head screwed on better, I will prevail.

I think I was fat because food was my everything! I ate when I was happy,I ate when I was sad,I ate when I was bored!! I just ate,ate,ate!! I would eat till I couldn't eat anymore..I would scare myself sometimes!! That is one of the things I love about the band is the control that it FORCES you to have!!It's soo nice to not have food control me anymore...makes me feel free!! I had a psychic tell me that I ate to build a barrier of protection around me so no-one or nothing could hurt me...very interesting!!

Oooh, the psychic must be a reader - since I just read the same thing in a book.

Many reasons why I am fat

#1 I LOVE food, I love to cook with lots of different flavors and textures

#2 I am member of the clean your plate club, yes eight years of a catholic school with nuns telling you there are thousands of starving children out there, will do that to you

#3 My daddy always said "You aren't poor as long as you have food in the house" He was raised during the great depression

#4 I eat when, I'm happy, sad, confused, frustrated, and mainly when I'm stressed out.

#5 I eat to be social, family functions always include food.

#6 I eat when I am lonely...Been divorced for three years and haven't dated in over a year.

Yup, lots of reasons...LOL

I pray the band helps most of those reasons

Portion Control and "night eating". I don't have a sweet tooth at all and often go hours and hours without eating. However, when I sit down for a meal, just don't get in my way or it will be like being run over by an Army Tank.

I also have a night eating problem that starting when I worked often into the night and ended up eating late and it became a habit even when I had eaten dinner. This also was a cause of my Acid Reflux.

I have been thin and fat in my adult life until recent years when I had given up and got up to a BMI of about 54.

My portion control problems clearly go back to when I was child, being the youngest of six (five were boys). Getting enough to eat became an issue of speed.

Also, since I have three boys myself I have become aware that the youngest child can often develop eating disorders as a result of "sibling abuse" (physical and mental, not sexual). The constant picking on about weight or anything can make the younger ones develop complexes.

I'm sure that I'm fat because of Habit. When I was a kid I was forced to eat everything on my plate, even when I wasn't hungry. So I still have that mentality to eat whatever is put in front of me, and naturally I fill up the plate.

My husband has been very helpful, helping me control my portions and asking if I'm full or not if he sees me slowing down. However, after going on a strict diet plan and Work out - I only averaged losing .5 lbs a week. So there could be some other reasons why I can't seem to lose. I can lose weight - just very slowly.

It's been an exhausting 15 years.

I was told I was fat as early as 4 years old, I think. I can only figure out I was around 4 because I hadn't started the first grade yet. My parents' friends commented that I was "chubby". I remember looking in the mirror at that young age, and not seeing the "chubbiness".

My mom limited my carbs. I remember sneaking bread to my room at night. Oh! It tasted so good.

At around age 10, I was put on a "Dr. supervised diet". I had a food plan to follow. I remember getting down from 115 to close to 100 pounds.

Then I remember weighing more than 115 pounds in High School. I would go on starvation diets all through High School. I remember my lowest being 114. I think I had a little help from "Dexatrim". Now, I think those numbers are very low, or normal. But, at the time, I always felt fat.

During college I weighed around 130 pounds. Until, I went home one summer and weighed a whopping 142 pounds. Again, I was taken to a Dr. This was my introduction to prescription diet pills. I got down to 99 pounds in about 4 months. I got so many compliments and loved being thin and shopping for clothes.

Then, I don't know what happpened. I yo-yo ed for the next several years. I actually wore ankle weights to weigh in at a Weight Watchers meeting. Without the ankle weights, I didn't have enough to lose! Several years went by and boom, my highest 183 pounds. I think I saw a picture of myself and could not believe it. I was in my late twenties by then. For the next 10 years, I continued to go up and down, the lowest being 125.

When I decided to get the lap band, I was 179 pounds. I am not even a month post op, and I'm already feeling like a failure because I have not been happy with the loss so far. Two days ago, I threw out my scale and fully intend to look forward and just do my best.

Being overweight has affected weather I'm happy or sad, I've been wearing black clothes daily for the last 10 years, my self esteem is at an all time low. I am 43 years old and don't want to continue the up and down cycle. I hope the lapband gives me the ability to keep the weight down for the rest of my life. Maybe one day, I'll be happy!

I think I am fat because food is comfort to me. I also think about food more than I believe the average person does. I had an angry father that caused everyone in the house to be on egg shells. I had a loving wonderful mother that treid to make up for the father we had. I was always the over weight one. I think I just turned to food for comfort. Now, even after being banded for over two years and lossing almost all of my weight, I still take way bigger portions than I can eat and I still want to eat more at night when everyone has gone to sleep. I do have a lot more awareness though about how I use food. The band has made me not be able to sabotage my weight loss even when I tried to at times. I am so greatful to my band for being a great tool to help me in my fight against over eating!