Hi, I was just wondering what your experiences have been as far as when you told people about your upcoming surgery. I feel like if my BMI was in the 50's it would be easier for people to understand and or be supportive of wanting to get this done.

My BMI is 39 as of today and I finally had the nerve to tell my best friend and she was totally not supportive and basically blew it off and said, "just join weight watchers, your not that big to have to go get a surgery". A friend at work told me basically the same thing too, "oh you aren't fat ha ha ha your so funny". But to me I am fat.......... obese......... whatever you want to call it. Just to name a few things, my knees and back hurt, I have no energy and this is so embarrassing to say but if I sit on the toilet to long my legs and feet fall asleep and I know that's from all this weight (242) I am carrying around. If weight watchers would work I would do it but obviously it dosen't nor does/did all the other 20 diets I have tried . I just feel like I have to really explain myself like when I was telling her I kept saying but I'm so unhealthy, if I wasn't unhealthy then I wouldn't do this, my Dr. thinks it's for the best, etc......

UGH, why can't people think this is great, be supportive, and be happy for me?

Im 5ft 2 in weight 198 lbs scheduled for lapband 12/15 many people say I just dont have self control willpower etc, also have type 2 diabetes, arthritis in knees. Some friends I have told about upcoming surgery others I havnt

I was close to 190 at 5 ' 1 1/2 inch tall when I had my band done.

When people ask me how I'm losing the weight, I don't lie! I tell them that I'm eating about 1/2 of what I used to eat. They are usually satisfied with that and I don't have any guilt feelings to contend with. i have only told my husband and 2 kids about my band and would love to spread the word to others, but on the other hand, I don't have to deal with all the negatives that would surely come if more people knew.

My surgery is Wednesday. I am so excited. My BMI is lower than 35. I've had 1 person not support me, my husband doesn't really care (unless we're talking about the expense of it), and my best friend is totally supportive. I haven't told my Mom or sister yet (who are both incredibly skinny). I too thought "I was taking the easy way out". I've gone back and forth many, many times about the right thing to do. I know this will be the best thing for me. Anyone who I think won't be supportive... I'm not telling. This is a great tool to make our lives better. Good for all of us. We are here to support each other!!!

Around May, 2008 my highest weight was around 225 and I'm 5'4. My weight at my pre-op apptointment was 210 (BMI of 37). Tomorrow I am exactly one month post-op (woohooo!) and weigh in at 195.

I sooooo agree with this. I was at 35 BMI for years and always had problems with slightly high blood pressure. 2 Summers ago I gained about 30 (for a variety of reasons) which increased my BMI to about 38/39. I cannot lose it (or I can and it reappears). My ins is even covering this. My best friend knows and my husband knows but no one else. I even told my daughter that I had gall bladder surgery because I didn't want her telling others and I didn't want her to have to lie. What people don't realize is I am 100 pounds over weight. I mean, if I lose 100, I will just be in the range for my height. I can't be that overweight and live a long healthy life and I need to for my daughter.

I sooooo agree with this. I was at 35 BMI for years and always had problems with slightly high blood pressure. 2 Summers ago I gained about 30 (for a variety of reasons) which increased my BMI to about 38/39. I cannot lose it (or I can and it reappears). My ins is even covering this. My best friend knows and my husband knows but no one else. I even told my daughter that I had gall bladder surgery because I didn't want her telling others and I didn't want her to have to lie. What people don't realize is I am 100 pounds over weight. I mean, if I lose 100, I will just be in the range for my height. I can't be that overweight and live a long healthy life and I need to for my daughter.

Omg I totally know what you mean when you say people don't realize you are around 100 pounds overweight! Me too, and no one ever believes me (which is one of the ways I was deluded into believing my problem wasn't so bad for such a long time!)

We can and WILL get there!

Good for you Shamrock! I know me and I can't keep any good news to myself so I will probably be telling people who don't even ask! I too had the same situation when I went to my meetings as well. I try to think they were not dirty looks just looks of yearning to be like you! The entire proceeder is so much easier on the body if it is at our weight than well over 40 BMI!

Great idea! mica

My overweight cardiologist said the other day "You're not that big". Others say you are not 100 lbs overweight...ya wanna weight me...I'm 98 over healthy weight...I carry it well I guess and can wear clothes to hide it but they don't have to feel the pain physical and mental of carrying it. .

I am 5'5 and 220. When I told my friends, I had people just laugh and then say Oh your not that big. I can hardly walk and I am in pain all the time. I have back problems and even telling people that I am tired of being in pain still did not change their minds. I really do not care at this point. My husband is very supportive and is happy that I did it. (11-6-08) My husband wants me to be around for him and my kids. I want a life and I want to feel good about myself. Society is so judgemental. When I told my husband I did not want to tell anyone because of the comments that I will hear, he said they are just going to be jelous. I want to have quality of life and not just be here. The band does not make the weight fall off, it is only a tool and you will still have to work for it. Getting the band is to help you live a longer, happier more fulfilled life. We have the opportunity to live a life and be healthy. Come here for support and do not tell anyone and when they ask how, just smile and say just watching what I am eating. Not lying. Good luck,

I didn't tell anybody IRL but my husband. This is precisely one of the reasons. I've toyed with the idea of telling my mom, but I don't know if I ever will.

Who was your doctor? If you don't mind be asking? I am still in research stages.