I am 6 weeks post-op and I've had dietary struggles. It's hard to admit old eating habits are returning. Depression and unworthiness feelings are getting stronger. I start over in my mind saying that it's OK just keep trying. I fear being chastised by my doctor, I still battle with the familiar plus-size me and the new body I'm trying to get to. I need an accountability partner who is understanding and supportive but who can be a mentor. Sometimes I want to fade into the background of mediocrity, then there are other times I want to live my best life. I'm going nowhere fast in the tug of war I'm in with myself. Can someone relate and help me?

I think you would benefit from a councillor. What we go through is huge. I had the very hard realisation that food was my best friend and then went through the grieving process it's tough. Do the best you can you are worthy and you can do this.

I agree with sleevesk about the therapist. A lot of people swear that they help so much. I wish I could find someone near me who specializes in disordered eating. I am 16 months post op and got down to my easy goal but not my dream goal. I am on medications that can cause some weight gain so they warned me that may happen. I would’ve been happy enough to maintain there but now I am dealing with some life stress and a medication change and my weight is already starting to creep back up. Not trying to scare you but I am an emotional eater and I know that this would’ve been easier if I had the tools that are learned in therapy. I say you have come this far, may as well do whatever you can to set yourself up for long term success.

I would highly recommend counseling for sure. Getting professional help in managing those feelings, learning new coping skills, and addressing the underlying stuff that is driving those feelings and behaviors is life change, hard, necessary work. The surgery can only get you so far, it is just a tool. The more tools you have, the better.

I would also suggest a support program, something with REAL people that you can interact with (this is just a message board, its pretty one-sided). Personally, I am a member of BariNation and LOVE it. It has been a game changer for me. But there are tons of other options out there. Your surgery center might even have support groups. Regardless of what/where, it can be incredibly beneficial to have support in a group setting with real people.

I agree with finding a support group and therapist. It can be very hard to find a bariatric therapist, but check with your surgery center, they should have someone, but they might be booked out quite a ways.

There is T.R.I.B.E, but I don't know too much about it. If you're on instagram it's "the sleeved dietician" and her group. There are also some good podcasts like "Our Sleeved Life Podcast" and Bariatric Nutrition with Dr. Susan Mitchell (Dr. Susan Mitchell has a facebook group that is nice).

Good luck!

I literally just stopped by to tell you that you are beautiful! Your eyes are mesmerizing!

I hope you find the help you seek.

Thank you all for taking the time to respond to me. I will seek professional help because I realize that I need that added support to get me through this phase I'm in right now. I am my worst critic and I have to get to the root cause of my self-sabotage tactics. Thank you all because I needed it.

I've started therapy to try to get some of my issues figured out, before I head into surgery. If nothing else, I can at least get the relationship established, so I'm comfortable talking to the therapist after my surgery when the stuff is really going to be coming up.

On 7/13/2022 at 1:07 AM, babysha6 said:

I am 6 weeks post-op and I've had dietary struggles. It's hard to admit old eating habits are returning. Depression and unworthiness feelings are getting stronger. I start over in my mind saying that it's OK just keep trying. I fear being chastised by my doctor, I still battle with the familiar plus-size me and the new body I'm trying to get to. I need an accountability partner who is understanding and supportive but who can be a mentor. Sometimes I want to fade into the background of mediocrity, then there are other times I want to live my best life. I'm going nowhere fast in the tug of war I'm in with myself. Can someone relate and help me?

First, forgive yourself for struggling! It’s ok. I am pre-op but trying to overcome my food issues before surgery (many people don’t). It’s not a straight path to success but a journey of learning and understanding yourself that takes twists and turns. Talk to your doctor about the struggle. Talk to a nutritionist or a counselor or both! Get the support needed to get to know your new existence. It takes a while to get to know a new person, and you are getting to know the new you. But most importantly please forgive yourself. You are doing better than you think and can get through this bump.