Hello everyone I'm new here I'm supposed to be having gastric bypass surgery done soon but I don't know if i should. Because I am a food addict and I fear I will regain. Started looking into wls over a year ago n actually gain about 20lbs!!! Why do something if you're are going to fail right? I don't want to have my intestine rerouted to lose weight then gain it back like people on here. I need to loose a 100 pounds. Im over 230lbs scary

I need help.

I know I'm a food addict.

All of us here are food addicts to some degree or another, or else we wouldn't be here at all. My question to you: Are you willing to take the scary steps to give up your addiction? You WILL lose weight with surgery - no question, and you will be given a grace period of 6-18 months in which to learn new behaviors and new ways to cope with stress and emotions. Are you willing to learn new skills? If so, you will be successful.
The other warning for all of us is the issue of transfer addictions. We MUST learn new coping mechanisms or else risk other addictive behaviors like alcohol, drugs, gambling, shopping, etc.
There is simply no easy way to overcome obesity and all the related issues without commitment and a willing heart. Counselling is very important for many, as this is uncharted territory for all of us. I can assure you that there are plenty of tools and resources available. The bottom line is whether or not you are willing to make the lifestyle and dietary changes. You cannot possibly figure out all the answers at this point - it is a journey of discovery. But if you are willing, the help is there are you will be successful.

Yes I am willing to take that step but I'm scared that i will slack off n fail.

4 hours ago, foodie669 said:

Yes I agree with you 100%. They (my team) know that i gain weight but they seem not to care much about it & saying its ok I'll do better after surgery. But what if i dont? One minute I feel like I'm ready & the next I'm like i can't do this. I do feel like I need more time honestly to work on me before making this step. Then again I don't want to put if off n gain more weight & develop any weight related issue.sigh....

One main thing I personally think is INCREDIBLY important and I think almost all of us have encountered that...and that is telling a doctor, medical professional, nurse, or what have you.....that we have a concern and when we get a reply like 'you'll do better after XYZ', is that sometimes I feel like I'm either not being heard or that my fears are being glossed over. And then, I'd get even more worried or stressed as I sometimes feel I was being 'pacified' not answered. Sometimes this was true, sometimes it was not.

Whether it is something as major as this surgery or maybe something not as big, I remind myself that despite the "relationship" of dr to patient, therapist to patient, etc. is that I am the client. With this surgery and all of my concerns at one point when I did not feel I was being heard, I kindly and patiently pushed the issue. Everything was then resolved to the happiness of everyone.

And everyone has their own individual level of what it takes for them to feel heard. For many this could be simply hearing them say "you'll do better after surgery". For me, that would not be enough but the IMPORTANT CRITICAL thing is if it is enough for you. If it is, that is great! As you can see, you will get much support here whether you have the surgery tomorrow or a year from now.

I wish you nothing but the best!

One main thing I personally think is INCREDIBLY important and I think almost all of us have encountered that...and that is telling a doctor, medical professional, nurse, or what have you.....that we have a concern and when we get a reply like 'you'll do better after XYZ', is that sometimes I feel like I'm either not being heard or that my fears are being glossed over. And then, I'd get even more worried or stressed as I sometimes feel I was being 'pacified' not answered. Sometimes this was true, sometimes it was not.
Whether it is something as major as this surgery or maybe something not as big, I remind myself that despite the "relationship" of dr to patient, therapist to patient, etc. is that I am the client. With this surgery and all of my concerns at one point when I did not feel I was being heard, I kindly and patiently pushed the issue. Everything was then resolved to the happiness of everyone.
And everyone has their own individual level of what it takes for them to feel heard. For many this could be simply hearing them say "you'll do better after surgery". For me, that would not be enough but the IMPORTANT CRITICAL thing is if it is enough for you. If it is, that is great! As you can see, you will get much support here whether you have the surgery tomorrow or a year from now.
I wish you nothing but the best!

Thank you so much and I wish you nothing but the best on your journey as well. I agree 1000%. That's exactly how I feel! I don't feel like my issue/concerns is resolved.

7 minutes ago, foodie669 said:

Thank you so much and I wish you nothing but the best on your journey as well. I agree 1000%. That's exactly how I feel! I don't feel like my issue/concerns is resolved.

Thank you! My recommendation "make them hear you" I think if you felt that your concerns were being given due consideration, that some of your own fears would be lightened.

That's just a guess...I only 'play doctor' in my own house to much eye rolling from my family...LOL

I also understand that many WLS staff have seen a zillion of us so sometimes maybe when we feel we're being given a rote answer....they are doing so out of habit and are not intentionally 'not hearing us' but my gut usually has me trying to ensure that I'm heard...cuz this is a big dang step so I need them to hear "Karen"..not patient 'XYZ"

At the end of the day, usually no one can advocate as well as we individually can

Edited September 29, 20196 yr by KarenLR75

Sounds like you really need to take advantage of psychological help to deal with the triggers and emotional issues that result in food addiction.

I would not bother with surgery until you are ready and prepared.

It is a lot of pain to go through if you're not fully committed. You need to be ready to change everything you've been taught and start a whole new way of life.

I found Weight loss surgery podcasts the other day. The first one I listened to (while on a 4 mile walk) was about food addiction. Very informative. If you listen you will see that your surgery will be the break you need to reset your body and calm it eliminate those good addictions.

Where did you get the podcast, I like your idea and it might make a walk go quicker, i addition to learning something?

12 hours ago, foodie669 said:

Yes I am willing to take that step but I'm scared that i will slack off n fail.

The fear of failure keeps us from so many opportunities! There are many times in life when we come up against obstacles - it feels like a wall. We can't see what is on the other side (the future). We don't know if it is even possible to get over the wall at all. Many will turn away and see the wall as insurmountable. Some of us see the wall and are determined to get past it. You will never see the missed opportunity unless you persevere.

Some of the greatest experiences of my like have been found on the other side of walls! I never would have known had I not persevered. WLS is like that. Great opportunity for a whole new like awaits, but you have to take the risks, which include failure. I think the fear of failure is because you want it so badly and because it means so much to you. Failing feels like utter devastation. I get that. We cannot know the future - only the steps we take today. Successful WLS is a series of small, daily steps. One day at a time... step, step, step...... and persevering all the way to success, inspite of set backs, inspite of challenges.... step, step, step. If you can persevere one day at a time, you can be successful. Don't let the wall (fear of failure) keep you from an unbelievable journey and a new life.

I don't know how old you are, but for us mature geezers (I am 63), WLS is the only option left after we have tried it all. My health was failing and I was losing my life and ability to be mobile and active. Don't wait until you get to where I was - joint replacements and irreversible damage to my knees, hips, and spine. Fatty liver, severe sleep apnea, asthma, Barrett's esophagitis with tumor, blood sugar and blood pressure creeping up, hysterectomy due to precancerous obesity...... oh the years of life I lost! Don't make that mistake!

The fear of failure keeps us from so many opportunities! There are many times in life when we come up against obstacles - it feels like a wall. We can't see what is on the other side (the future). We don't know if it is even possible to get over the wall at all. Many will turn away and see the wall as insurmountable. Some of us see the wall and are determined to get past it. You will never see the missed opportunity unless you persevere.
Some of the greatest experiences of my like have been found on the other side of walls! I never would have known had I not persevered. WLS is like that. Great opportunity for a whole new like awaits, but you have to take the risks, which include failure. I think the fear of failure is because you want it so badly and because it means so much to you. Failing feels like utter devastation. I get that. We cannot know the future - only the steps we take today. Successful WLS is a series of small, daily steps. One day at a time... step, step, step...... and persevering all the way to success, inspite of set backs, inspite of challenges.... step, step, step. If you can persevere one day at a time, you can be successful. Don't let the wall (fear of failure) keep you from an unbelievable journey and a new life.
I don't know how old you are, but for us mature geezers (I am 63), WLS is the only option left after we have tried it all. My health was failing and I was losing my life and ability to be mobile and active. Don't wait until you get to where I was - joint replacements and irreversible damage to my knees, hips, and spine. Fatty liver, severe sleep apnea, asthma, Barrett's esophagitis with tumor, blood sugar and blood pressure creeping up, hysterectomy due to precancerous obesity...... oh the years of life I lost! Don't make that mistake!

What sound advice!!!! Thank you so so much!!!![emoji108]???

On 09/29/2019 at 09:53, Lynda486 said:

Where did you get the podcast, I like your idea and it might make a walk go quicker, i addition to learning something?

https://clicks.aweber.com/y/ct/?l=MT.hS&m=3vbRD48tAMRdiT3&b=QS3I7t0Ju.WMcdWu8kBh_A

Sounds like you really need to take advantage of psychological help to deal with the triggers and emotional issues that result in food addiction.
I would not bother with surgery until you are ready and prepared.
It is a lot of pain to go through if you're not fully committed. You need to be ready to change everything you've been taught and start a whole new way of life.

Yes I need to before I get two three four hundred pounds and I'll be Doom. Thank you so much.

I found Weight loss surgery podcasts the other day. The first one I listened to (while on a 4 mile walk) was about food addiction. Very informative. If you listen you will see that your surgery will be the break you need to reset your body and calm it eliminate those good addictions.

Thanks I will look into that :-)

The fear of failure keeps us from so many opportunities! There are many times in life when we come up against obstacles - it feels like a wall. We can't see what is on the other side (the future). We don't know if it is even possible to get over the wall at all. Many will turn away and see the wall as insurmountable. Some of us see the wall and are determined to get past it. You will never see the missed opportunity unless you persevere.
Some of the greatest experiences of my like have been found on the other side of walls! I never would have known had I not persevered. WLS is like that. Great opportunity for a whole new like awaits, but you have to take the risks, which include failure. I think the fear of failure is because you want it so badly and because it means so much to you. Failing feels like utter devastation. I get that. We cannot know the future - only the steps we take today. Successful WLS is a series of small, daily steps. One day at a time... step, step, step...... and persevering all the way to success, inspite of set backs, inspite of challenges.... step, step, step. If you can persevere one day at a time, you can be successful. Don't let the wall (fear of failure) keep you from an unbelievable journey and a new life.
I don't know how old you are, but for us mature geezers (I am 63), WLS is the only option left after we have tried it all. My health was failing and I was losing my life and ability to be mobile and active. Don't wait until you get to where I was - joint replacements and irreversible damage to my knees, hips, and spine. Fatty liver, severe sleep apnea, asthma, Barrett's esophagitis with tumor, blood sugar and blood pressure creeping up, hysterectomy due to precancerous obesity...... oh the years of life I lost! Don't make that mistake!

Thank you so much for taking the time out to read and respond to my post. It means so much to me. I can tell you someone who's fill with knowledge and experience. Your respond touch me greatly. Sorry to hear that you have been through so much and glad things are better now for you... I just turn 30 years old.

What sound advice!!!! Thank you so so much!!!![emoji108]???

Yes indeed

Go to YouTube and watch Dr. Matthew Weiner's WLS stuff. Lots of really good information - everything from which surgery to choose, diets in various stages, how to maintain. Every surgeon has their own take on how they like to advance diets, and you still have to do what your doctor says, but I found his information to be very helpful when I was in the preop stage, even when I was trying to decide if WLS was an option for me.