Is it just me or are people being rather aloof to me at work? Is it just me or are people being a tad snippy and not greeting me so wholeheartedly as In the past.. like when my rolly Polly . Jolly ole self came through the door and intimidated no one because I was no one’s competition just the girl at work you’re glad your not as big as?!! It’s weird that I’m being treated differently and it makes me sad because it’s NOT my imagination, my now 67 lb weight loss is ruffling feathers and it’s pissing me off that people I love ,who I’ve supported and encouraged are jealous... I didn’t see this coming . It’s a lonesome feeling ?

Edited June 6, 20197 yr by Carrot64

Most posts I've read report being treated better after losing weight, like they're no longer invisible. But there are always those jealous or resentful souls out there that begrudge you your success or were maybe secretly hoping you'd fail. Sorry you're going through this.

Hmmm, that's interesting. Now that you mention it, some of the women around my neighborhood are looking at me differently now and making it a point to tell me they're the wives of the husbands on the block. Nobody did that when I was a big fat blob. Hmmm, I guess it's some of those things we don't think about when losing weight. I guess it's a good thing in a way???

I can relate. I've lost a bit of weight. I work at the County jail in the counseling department. Women employees are allowed to wear skirts and dresses provided they're at knee length. I have a skirt that I've worn many times before, but last week when I wore it my boss said I can't wear it anymore. He said I'm supposed to only wear pants, no more dresses or skirts. I asked where it said in our dress code, he said it's not there but according to him for my protection and security I'm now only restricted to wear jeans/pants. For now, I'm not fighting it. I just have to buy more pants.

Wow, seriously sounds like some insecure ppl around you guy's.
So sorry for the way that you are being treated. It's very sad but maybe your journey is intimidating them.
Just try to move on and just be yourself.
Good luck

Sent from my SM-G960U using BariatricPal mobile app

Med28,
Maybe your boss is hearing comments about your success and is just trying to nip a problem that could occur in the bud before it happens.

Sent from my SM-G960U using BariatricPal mobile app

I have some similar issues, Some people who are still bigger that I used to be "One Of Them" now get uncomfortable talking about things dealing with weight or food around me. Not so much that they are cold just that my weight loss has perhaps made them more self conscious about themselves. I also have found the thinner/average sized co-workers fall into three groups

1. The super supportive ones who suddenly want to discuss protein shakes and workout routines with yout

2. The insecure ones who start telling you to STOP LOSING WEIGHT, or YOU LOOK SICK, or YOU LOOK LIKE A BOBBLE HEAD

3. The secret saboteurs those ones that come in with a bag of peanut m&ms and offer you some

I try to remind myself that the only thing I can do is not let their reactions change my attitude which is honestly easier said than done. But I am trying everyday to stay the same personality wise, and I am still and will always be a fat girl in my head so I try to not let my appearance or the surgery and my lifestyle changes change the way that I interact with people and it has honestly gotten better. My larger friends know I am not judging them or their food choices and also that they can talk about food or eat in front of me it doesn't bother me at all. My thinner/average size friends know that I am not going to eat what they offer me but thanks anyway, and I will totally talk about protein shakes but I still hate working out, and the insecure ones have to work on themselves not the other way around so I don't waste my time of them if they are rude or negative toward me because they are the ones who changed not me.

Hang in there it can be alarming on the outside to see the changes we are going through after surgery but if you keep being you they will either come around or they were not worth your time to begin with.

24 minutes ago, allies journey said:

Med28,
Maybe your boss is hearing comments about your success and is just trying to nip a problem that could occur in the bud before it happens.

Sent from my SM-G960U using BariatricPal mobile app

Well, I don’t have a boss.. my work situation is unique. Everyone else that works where I work are average weight women and I was always the big girl who relied a lot on personality... I was small a few times in my life just not around this particular group.. I have always tried to build them up and everyone I care about for That matter.. I’m not expecting anyone to gush.. I just don’t like the weird vibe that the new me seems to drum up..

8 hours ago, med28thmed said:

I can relate. I've lost a bit of weight. I work at the County jail in the counseling department. Women employees are allowed to wear skirts and dresses provided they're at knee length. I have a skirt that I've worn many times before, but last week when I wore it my boss said I can't wear it anymore. He said I'm supposed to only wear pants, no more dresses or skirts. I asked where it said in our dress code, he said it's not there but according to him for my protection and security I'm now only restricted to wear jeans/pants. For now, I'm not fighting it. I just have to buy more pants.

Your post sort of lit my WTF fire about treatment of women in and the concept of perpetuating caveman-like thought processes to justify a discriminatory "order". I'm glad you are ok with what transpired and do not feel unfairly treated. But if you do (maybe not now, but in the future?) you are entirely in your rights to challenge your boss.

♥️

37 minutes ago, ms.sss said:

Your post sort of lit my WTF fire about treatment of women in and the concept of perpetuating caveman-like thought processes to justify a discriminatory "order". I'm glad you are ok with what transpired and do not feel unfairly treated. But if you do (maybe not now, but in the future?) you are entirely in your rights to challenge your boss.

♥️

I had a similar reaction, but you wrote it more diplomatically than I would have!

I can relate. I've lost a bit of weight. I work at the County jail in the counseling department. Women employees are allowed to wear skirts and dresses provided they're at knee length. I have a skirt that I've worn many times before, but last week when I wore it my boss said I can't wear it anymore. He said I'm supposed to only wear pants, no more dresses or skirts. I asked where it said in our dress code, he said it's not there but according to him for my protection and security I'm now only restricted to wear jeans/pants. For now, I'm not fighting it. I just have to buy more pants.

Ok I think that's really weird that your boss said that when he can't even point to the dress code manual