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Don't pray for me



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So, here's a topic I know may anger some, but is there anyone else who can't stand when someone just assumes you're religious and offers to pray for you? As an atheist, I never presume to guess what anyone else's beliefs are and I don't go around telling random people there is no god, especially in a time of turmoil or crisis. So when I tell someone I'm having surgery, or about any other significant event, whether in person or online, how about a little common courtesy and not just assuming I believe as you do and leaving your religion out of it?

I'm not looking to debate the existence of god here, I'm just trying to get people to realize that other people believe differently than they do and to not make assumptions.

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1 minute ago, elforman said:

So, here's a topic I know may anger some, but is there anyone else who can't stand when someone just assumes you're religious and offers to pray for you? As an atheist, I never presume to guess what anyone else's beliefs are and I don't go around telling random people there is no god, especially in a time of turmoil or crisis. So when I tell someone I'm having surgery, or about any other significant event, whether in person or online, how about a little common courtesy and not just assuming I believe as you do and leaving your religion out of it?

I'm not looking to debate the existence of god here, I'm just trying to get people to realize that other people believe differently than they do and to not make assumptions.

How is someone offering to do something for you offensive? I understand that you may think it's a waste of time, but why offensive?

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Just now, Orchids&Dragons said:

How is someone offering to do something for you offensive? I understand that you may think it's a waste of time, but why offensive?

Because its equally disrespectful to my beliefs as it would be if I told someone there was no god when trying to comfort them.

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2 minutes ago, elforman said:

Because its equally disrespectful to my beliefs as it would be if I told someone there was no god when trying to comfort them.

I don't get the parallel, but I'll think about it. Are you ok with positive thoughts/wishes sent your way?

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1 minute ago, Orchids&Dragons said:

I don't get the parallel, but I'll think about it. Are you ok with positive thoughts/wishes sent your way?

That's fine. If it helps explain it, my problem is with people assuming that I believe in a god and that I should automatically appreciate their prayers. It is very presumptuous of them.

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3 minutes ago, elforman said:

That's fine. If it helps explain it, my problem is with people assuming that I believe in a god and that I should automatically appreciate their prayers. It is very presumptuous of them.

So are you ok will postive thoughts/wishes?

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I see elformans pont. Think of another way - what if someone just nonchalantly offered to slaughter a chicken as a token of goodwill for your upcoming surgery? Or if someone offered to perform a ritual to their lord and master Satan? Many people would be aghast at the thought.

On the other hand, if someone said prayers were being done for me, I would just assume they meant positive thoughts and let it roll off my back. If someone is posting something that a is looking for support, offering to pray for someone is just that persons way of showing support. No different than saying Merry Christmas to a stranger who is actually Jewish. Take the comment as it was intended, not as an innuendo to convert another.

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lol, I love how my comment of slaughtering a chicken links to the BariatricPal Store. If I need to slaughter a chicken, at least I can do it in a bariatric friendly way.

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1 minute ago, Sosewsue61 said:

I think if you are an atheist why would it even matter?

Quite honestly, I find the presumption that I believe in the unprovable and the impossible to be insulting. I don't look down on anyone else who does believe because in virtually every case it's how they were raised and what they were taught to believe.

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1 minute ago, BigViffer said:

lol, I love how my comment of slaughtering a chicken links to the BariatricPal Store. If I need to slaughter a chicken, at least I can do it in a bariatric friendly way.

It would be better had it linked to a recipe for Satanic Chicken. It's just like regular chicken but it's very, very spicy. Serve on your best pentagram-adorned china.

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4 minutes ago, BigViffer said:

No different than saying Merry Christmas to a stranger who is actually Jewish. Take the comment as it was intended, not as an innuendo to convert another.

I wish people Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukah all the time, but only if I know that's what they Celebrate or there's an obvious sign such as a cross necklace or yarmulke on the head. I don't assume anything.

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It's the thought behind it that counts, no one intends insult nor offense when offering a prayer.

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18 minutes ago, elforman said:

only if I know that's what they Celebrate

i agree, you should not say merry christmas

or happy hannukah to everyone. there are

other religious days too - should not assume.

I always will say happy holidays, happy new year

there are OP that might not appreciate

those phrases either- oh well, can't please all the

people all the time

kathy

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Well maybe if you know people well enough to discuss something as personal as weight loss surgery with them they should be close enough to you to be aware that you are atheist. I do not discuss my medical history with casual acquaintances and have only told a select group of about 10-15 people anything about my WLS. I would never mention it on any social media sites I frequent.

I do have friends that are atheist and I have no problem accepting their beliefs which are different from mine and I agree that it would be insensitive to say I would pray for them.

Edited by MIZ60

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