I never wanted to tell my kids about the surgery. I decided to tell my oldest she's 13 after seeing so many other parents share. My surgery is tomorrow and now she's crying about it. I feel terrible

Just explain to her it's so you can be around for her in the future.

She is probably just scared for you.
The night of my surgery when my husband and 17 year old came home from the hospital she called me and was crying saying she misses me. (She doesn't ever say that because I never leave her lol ). I think she was just overwhelmed and relieved at the same time.
Any change is hard especially at 13 years old- they don't understand everything that is involved. Good luck to you. Please let us know how she does after your surgery

Just explain to her it's so you can be around for her in the future.

She is probably just scared for you.
The night of my surgery when my husband and 17 year old came home from the hospital she called me and was crying saying she misses me. (She doesn't ever say that because I never leave her lol ). I think she was just overwhelmed and relieved at the same time.
Any change is hard especially at 13 years old- they don't understand everything that is involved. Good luck to you. Please let us know how she does after your surgery

Thank you like you I was surprised I initially didn't want to share with her to avoid this. We decided to tell her and she's been doing so well she even took my pictures yesterday for post-op comparisons. She's been really good about until today I guess is scared

Awwww. Our sweet little kids.

Its nice you told her. You will want to share your progress with her. My daughter made me try on her tight yoga pants and tank top then took pics. I think your daughter will love sharing your journey.

Awwww. Our sweet little kids.
Its nice you told her. You will want to share your progress with her. My daughter made me try on her tight yoga pants and tank top then took pics. I think your daughter will love sharing your journey.

Thank you she's a great support I just hate she's stressed by this.

My 13 year old made me sign a contract that if I die, she gets a purebred kitten and an Alienware computer.

I had no trouble signing it, because I wouldn't be there! Lol.

My 13 year old made me sign a contract that if I die, she gets a purebred kitten and an Alienware computer.

I had no trouble signing it, because I won't be there! Lol.

Omg this is hilarious !!!

Yeah, she's great [emoji41]

My kids-- two 17 year olds, 15, and 10 (all were a year younger when I was sleeved) have been great! They are all active and athletic and keep me honest wrt exercise. My recovery was really easy and I honestly think they often forget I had wls. The older ones did some research and that alleviate their concerns. On my third day post op I had a big crying spell caused by a major case of buyer's remorse-- my oldest son told me that there was no going back and that my courage inspired him to get beyond his own fear in a certain area, which made me feel guilty about my pity party and determined to go forward. The kids keep me busy and I'm so grateful that I told them.

My kids-- two 17 year olds, 15, and 10 (all were a year younger when I was sleeved) have been great! They are all active and athletic and keep me honest wrt exercise. My recovery was really easy and I honestly think they often forget I had wls. The older ones did some research and that alleviate their concerns. On my third day post op I had a big crying spell caused by a major case of buyer's remorse-- my oldest son told me that there was no going back and that my courage inspired him to get beyond his own fear in a certain area, which made me feel guilty about my pity party and determined to go forward. The kids keep me busy and I'm so grateful that I told them.

Do you still feel that buyer's remorse?
That's awesome how your kids got involved.. love it

Reading this is so timely for me. I'm scheduled for surgery in a month but can't decided what to tell my kids. They are young - the oldest is 12, but old enough that they will notice me not eating lol. Some explanation will be needed! I guess the problem is that I feel ashamed that I need to do it, that I let things go so far....

I told my 9 year old, answered his questions and let him be a part of the process, we do things like look at recipe ideas on Pinterest together. I can tell he didn't love the surgery day but I guess I never considered not telling him. This change in my life is impacting both him and my husband and changing the way we all eat and the activity we do, so we approach it as a family.

1poundatatime .... Feelings like shame are going to do more harm than good. You have nothing to be ashamed of! There is a reason more people are heavy than aren't... it is an issue with our environment. Food is too easy to come by, it's nutrient deficient, and it is chemical-laden with appetite stimulating effects.

Anyone that knows me knows I accept responsibility for my own actions. I admit I am in this mess because I eat 3 dinners. But, I also see undigested food come out the other end, and have lost half my hair. (I am preop). I've been walking around in a fog for a decade.

I started taking vitamins, practicing for after surgery. The brain fog IMMEDIATELY cleared up! Apparently I've been overeating so long due to deficiencies. Problem is, my metabolism is all messed up now. I need the reset.

Anyway, I digress... what are we talking about? Oh yeah, kids.

I told everyone my surgery is the 21st of March. It is actually the 20th. Surgery will be over with before they have a chance to start worrying.

6 hours ago, Berry78 said:

1poundatatime .... Feelings like shame are going to do more harm than good. You have nothing to be ashamed of! There is a reason more people are heavy than aren't... it is an issue with our environment. food is too easy to come by, it's nutrient deficient, and it is chemical-laden with appetite stimulating effects.

Anyone that knows me knows I accept responsibility for my own actions. I admit I am in this mess because I eat 3 dinners. But, I also see undigested food come out the other end, and have lost half my hair. (I am preop). I've been walking around in a fog for a decade.

I started taking Vitamins, practicing for after surgery. The brain fog IMMEDIATELY cleared up! Apparently I've been overeating so long due to deficiencies. Problem is, my metabolism is all messed up now. I need the reset.

Anyway, I digress... what are we talking about? Oh yeah, kids.

I told everyone my surgery is the 21st of March. It is actually the 20th. Surgery will be over with before they have a chance to start worrying.

Thank you Berry78 for your encouraging words.

I know I shouldn't be ashamed, after all I'm taking steps to improve my life and my health and my kids are a major motivator for the surgery.

Obviously everyone can see I'm fat, but I've kept the battle internal all these years. I didn't let on that my weight bothered me or how much it is holding me back. So, coming out and telling my kids... and thus, everyone! Family, friends, other parents at the kids school, coworkers... makes me feel really vulnerable.

I'm thinking an after the fact announcement might be the way to go. Then I don't have to hear the nay sayers and let them rattle my nerves pre-op, but the truth is out there!

Our surgery dates are really close. I'm March 16. I've been taking my vitamins and am doing shooting for a big Protein, low carb prep until the pre-op officially starts two week prior to surgery. It's been going well! Down 10 lbs in just under 3 weeks How are you doing??

Sweet! I like the sound of your pre- diet diet, and I agree with the after-the-fact announcement.

I've been thinking I want to do the prediet thing, but my family is busy having birthdays and food funerals for me. (I don't care about food funerals, but they do apparently).

I went to GNC and got my first tub of protein powder. Gonna try it tomorrow for breakfast. Also got powdered vitamins... tired of swallowing pills

I like that you've already lost so much! That is wonderful! Thanks for the motivation to hurry and get started!

I've been doing a Protein shake for breakfast. Kaizen Protein Powder (from Costco), a handful of frozen strawberries, almond milk, and a squirt of pineapple/coconut Water flavour stuff. Delicious!!

I did one food funeral. pizza. I love pizza. I have cheated once or twice (small cheats ), but for the most part my cravings have been under control.

Enjoy your breakfast shake!