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Feeling discouraged no support

Hello,

I am feeling a little blue I have shared with some family and friends my decision to have gastric bypass. All I hear is your going the easy way out, your being lazy why don't you just get off your butt and excercise and eat well. My surgery date is 01/29/15 and start my Liver shrinking diet on 01/15/15.

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Don't be blue--Not everyone understands; that's why you have all of us!. seriously, only people who have walked in your shoes can fully understand the decision you have made. Others, even the ones we love and love us, don't always understand ---they may not express it well, but most of them are just worried about surgery & complications.

If you've done your research and you're committed to this process, then just remember you are doing this for yourself and it shouldn't be based on everyone else's opinions--just yours & your doctor's. I know that everyone in my life that was against the idea of surgery has since changed their minds now that they see how my health and my self confidence has changed. I'm truly happier and that shows in my relationships as well.

Best of luck on your surgery and your journey; Keep us updated on your progress!--Lisa

Hello Mia!! :)

Welcome to a place where (for the most part) you will find people who will support you, encourage you, and give your their heartfelt advice if asked. I just so happen to be one of those people. Congrats on your decision to have WLS. I wish you all the best!! Drop me a line anytime.

  • Author

Lisa,

I appreciate your response and kind words. Thank you

Trever,

Thank you, I am very excited for my WLS! :)

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author

Thank you!

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author

Thank you, tweety208.

Have you ever thought that its them that are afraid? Afraid of change, they are so use to you being the overweight one that they need you to stay that way. You are doing this for you, not them. Some family are going to be that way regardless.

What we are doing is no picnic. You do what is best for you, don't base your happiness on others no matter who they are, Good Luck to you

  • 2 weeks later...

Never, EVER let anyone make you feel like you've taken the "easy way out". To this day I still dont understand how WLS (followed correctly) is considered EASY.

Its easy for those around us who still choose not to take a stand for their own health to "nit pick" or try to bring us down. As they say, misery loves company, in which you do NOT want to be a part of. Many of those who have bad things to say are enablers and will make this epic journey for you painful.

You've taken a stand and chose to better yourself. Does your hospital offer support groups? I highly recommend attending if they do.

Sadly I also have many friends and family members who are constantly saying "When are you going to stop losing weight?" "Dont you think you've lost enough? You're going to disappear." Or "Do you eat?" The last one hurts more then anything, but I shrug it off and I smile. I stand proud for what I've done, the journey I've taken, and the fact that I chose to really live and enjoy life.

You're going to do GREAT! Change isnt always easy, but when the change is good, I can promise you it is SO good and SO worth it.

  • Author

Thank you! They are so wrong it is difficult.

PS, how is it going for you? You're coming up on one month. :)

  • Author

I'm ok sometimes I ask myself why I did this. It's mostly when I see my family eat :(

Trust me, that thought will go away! Next thing you know you'll be looking at yourself going " I am SO glad I did this!"

I'm ok sometimes I ask myself why I did this. It's mostly when I see my family eat :(

I just wanted to "weigh in" on this. About 5 years ago I had lost 160 lbs on my own and it was difficult. Unfortunately I gained a good portion of it back. 111 lbs to be exact. I am now 5 weeks post op. During my initial weight loss the process was hard but whenever you wanted to take a break from dieting for a day or so, you could. You could have a beer or some pizza or a burger etc... Then get back on the diet afterwards. With gastric bypass it is not the easy way out. It can and probably will take a mental and emotional toll on you. It is difficult to stay focus on what to eat, not overeating. Not being able to just eat whatever you want. You need to have mental fortitude to get through it. Does it make it easier to lose weight, yes... But that does not mean it's easier on you mentally.. Do what's best for you and who cares what others think. By the way.. It seems to get easier mentally as you begin to lose the weight. Right now it seems worth the fight.

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