I don't know how to feel.....

[Belledebayou 62]

I'm a week post op and the first place people are noticing my weight loss is in my face. The other night my husband says "You are gonna be such a knockout." he's always said I was beautiful but I don't know what to think about it. It's like I'm not pretty unless I'm skinny. I've thought I was pretty before surgery. It's just really confusing.

[CathyA72 47]

I'm sure he meant it to be the best compliment that he could have given. Some men well most men don't think before they speak. I'm sure he meant it with the most sincerity. I hope your doing well. My surger is on Monday..... So excited

[kimbernada 190]

I agree... and think how confusing it must be for your husband too.. I know mine has been pretty quiet on the whole weight loss thing... for the first 50 pounds. Now he gives me a compliment at least once a week. LOL I think he wasn't sure what to say.

[Momonanomo 534]

I'm sure your husband was trying to be complimentary and didn't think about the implications of his compliment. Guys don't think like us sometimes

I haven't been sleeved yet, but in the past, when I lost 75 lbs, I remember being kinda miffed and resentful when i felt that people I'd always known were treating me so much better than when I had been so overweight.

But then I thought -- well maybe it's MY behavior that's different, because I feel good, and energetic, and confident, and they're responding to that. (if only I could've maintained that loss. . . but anyways...)

He's always said you are beautiful; respect that he meant it. And have faith that he will be thrilled to see you happy and healthy. And I think maybe the glow of being happy and healthy is what people respond to -- not being 'skinny'. So ...you will be a total knock-out, because you will be happy and healthy!

I think major weight loss can mess with our heads a bit and get confusing. I plan to camp out on this forum, and seek support with local groups, and maybe even a counselor one-on-one.

best wishes to you, and kiss that hubby of yours -- he loves you and means well!

[Tekara3927 265]

Something to remember.... When you're losing weight.... Estrogen gets stored in fat cells, as you're melting away, this estrogen is getting released, you're going to be up and down, all around with your emotions. I'm a little over 3 months out and still emotional from time to time. Just remember that, and know that he prob was not trying to be mean to you, it looks like he was meaning it nicely, but like I said, you're emotional, you're reading into it. Everything will get better, and he's right, you will be a knock out!!!

Sent from my iPad using VST

[Rootman 1,101]

Hey, a true blue guy here, don't over analyze it. He meant it as a compliment, take it as such and let it go. The guy loves you, appreciates what you are doing and of course is pleased with the results. Tell the truth, YOU think you look better don't you? Well so does he.

Keep up the good work and reward the guy for paying attention.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

Don't over analyze what people say. He's just being supportive! Be thankful that he's just as excited as you are. My husband has seen how miserable I was and says the same thing. We get excited together daydreaming of the time I will actually be a normal weight and have the energy to do all the things we want to do!

[want2live 29]

I agree with everyone! It must be hard for a significant other to get this one right. They are damned if they do and damned if they don't. My fiancé has said from the beginning that he loves me the exact same no matter what.....but he certainly also recognized that I am NOT A HAPPY PERSON. He has said over and over that he just want me happy and healthy.....and that MY decision for WLS is supported fully. Now I live him even more for saying all the right things pre-op but now that I am post op (only 8 days).....of course I want him to notice the changes and be happy and excited WITH me.

[Belledebayou 62]

Thanks everyone. I don't think I would have done the surgery without him. I'm so grateful that he was there for me and has been for the last ten years. He's gonna have a sexy skinny b***h on his hands!! You all are right!! And I do think I look better.