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I Just Chickened Out

I think I grew feathers and a beak because I just called and canceled my appointment with the doctor for tomorrow :( I read a couple horror stories and everything is just so life or death that I can't calm my anxieties enough to go to my appointment. I'm afraid I may be stuck in this fat suit forever :mellow:

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  • I get it, it's terrifying! Do it anyway. Do it anyway! You will not regret doing it....you will regret NOT doing it! Getting your stomach ripped out won't kill you, it will make you a badass!

  • Ms skinniness
    Ms skinniness

    Instead of being a chicken, why don't you call the office and reschedule and just go and ask the surgeon questions that you are afraid of. Give it a chance and don't let your anxiety get you down.

  • funkeechiggen
    funkeechiggen

    Not trying to be mean, but what about the horror stories of people who died from their obesity? Were those not scary enough to chicken you out of being morbidly obese for the rest of your life? The

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I'm the same way. I won't lie. I did it mainly because I'm fly and I wanted access to more fashionable clothing to "preserve my sexy' date='"

:)[/quote']

I love this. Young fly and flashy! Haha...lol

Thanks guys...I am listening to ALL of you :D At 4:45pm I called my doc's office back and admitted to them I am scared and my fear was the reason I canceled. IDK if this is a "sign" of any kind BUT the receptionist totally understood and said that my appointment time was still available if I wanted to re-book it.....so I did. Tomorrow at 9am I will be going in to talk with the surgeon about all of this and letting her know all of my fears. The last surgery I had was just this past April, I had to have my ankle re-fused because it didn't heal right the first time. When I woke up in recovery my heart started to race on me and my nurse kinda scared me with the panic I could hear in her voice (she was yelling to the others "This one is going tachy! Mine is going tachy on me!" I kept asking her who was going tachy, if it was me? Finally she told me "Yes, you." so I bared down and took a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds and released it and my heart rate came back down to normal before she ever had the chance to get me any sort of meds. Not sure if that was just like that I came back to normal on my own or what but it freaked me out pretty good. Later I asked the doc about it and he said no one had mentioned it to him but that maybe I was just having a slight reaction to one of the anesthesia drugs? He wasn't completely sure what could have caused it....but this was orthopedics not GI).

I just want to say you are brave for re-booking and admitting to yourself the reasons you're scared. It's a big surgery, and a scary thing. That doesn't mean it's not worth it. Being obese for the rest of your life and getting sick? That scares the crap outta me too! I freaked out for almost the whole week before surgery, but I made it through and am on the other side and I can say that it is 100% worth it. I would not trade a moment I have had since surgery - because I finally am living my life. I don't know what your particular experiences have been, but I had given up so much to let me food addiction take over my life. I isolated myself and was really down on myself mentally. I am not perfect now, but I feel comfortable engaging in more activities. I know there were risks with my surgery - and not everything post-op has been flowers and cheer. But I wasn't really living for myself then, and I am now.

Anyway, I wish you all the best, and I really hope that everything goes well for you. If you are really anxious, I would follow others' advice and schedule a time to talk to your doctor before surgery. I also got some really good advice here the week before surgery. I can't remember who told me, but someone said I should write down every outcome I could think of and how I would handle it. Having a plan really did help. Plus I worked the days leading up to surgery so I'd gotten myself so tired that the night before I pretty much collapsed in my bed. Let us know how things go, and we'll be here for you all the way.

WLS isn't for everyone, and yes, there are risks. I think the biggest risk - quite honestly - is that the patient isn't really ready to make the lifestyle changes for long term success. I feel even myself wondering that and I have spent a lot of time and energy "preparing" myself for this path.

I just got back from a family funeral out of state. My sister in law dropped dead of a sudden heart attack at age 62. She was at least 150# overweight and had the co-morbidities that put her at risk of heart failure and it happened. She was an active, social and neat lady that we lost a couple of decades too early due to her obesity. My brother (her husband) and their adult daughter are also very large and I can tell you are pretty shaken up and deciding how they can improve their own outlook.

so, I would never try to talk someone into having WLS, but I do suggest you actually meet with a surgeon and discuss the ACTUAL risks (as they are real) and decide which path gives you the best odds of a healthy, high quality of life in the coming decades.

These forums are great for support - but when you focus on only the complications, or perhaps only focus on the "success" stories you don't get a balanced view of the actual results that a broad group of people have. Only some people stay posting on the forum!!!! So, to get a better picture, do actual research beyond reading posts on a forum.

note: okay, I missed the post saying you are going back- keep us posted what you learn! BTW, we were all terrified, so you are in good company!

Hi Nicci,

How did it go today?

  • Author

Are you prone to clotting? Is your varicose vein due to weight? My mom has had varicose veins since high school. She wasn't fat. She had me at 24. I don't see why a varicose vein would be a problem though. Do you realize how many people have varicose veins and have surgery.

No, I (knock on wood) have never thrown a clot before, but there is a first time for everything and given my current weight (which is the largest it has ever been) I'm sure my chances are increased. As far a Varicose veins go I have never really seen them in someones foot before, mainly just their calfs, hands and arms....so I wasn't sure if a foot one, which constantly has pressure placed on it while standing/walking, would bare any increased risk.

Not following your logic here... If you are in excellent health why are you considering the surgery?

I did mention that I have PCOS, which honestly other than cosmetically, hasn't impacted my life (oh and I had to use fertility medication to get the child that died an hour and 10min after his birth, as well as my twins). It's more preventative measures in my mind, not that I have to explain my reasoning for even having an interest in this surgery to you or anyone else. I think it would be great to FINALLY know what it's like to be average to slender in size, and at 30 I still have plenty of life to live and cute clothes to wear (well not at my current weight, clothing options are limited and tend to age a person or just be down right gaudy!). So yes, I would like to look good. I would like to know what it feels like, just once in my life, to have a man literally sweep me off my feet, I would like to go to theme parks and be able to ride the rides without fear of embarrassment of not fitting in the seat or possibly breaking the cart off of its hinges, to be confident and comfortable in my own skin and not feel as if I am being judged based on my appearance but to know any judgement being cast is based on my character! I would like to go white water rafting or mountain climbing with the girls. I would love to be more actively involved in play with my children and possibly even coach one of my daughters softball teams instead of sitting on the sideline and trying not to draw attention to myself. I would like for my 6y/o not to cry when people tell her she's just like her momma because she thinks that is their way of calling her fat (which shes not). I am entertaining the thought of possibly having this surgery simply because I can!

Hi Nicci,

How did it go today?

Thanks for asking :) It went pretty well and the surgeon agreed that this is probably in my best interest, given all the attempts I have made in the past (she laughed when I went as far back as Richard Simmons Deal-A-Meal plan and his sweatin' to the oldies routine). She gave me a book entitled "Weight Loss Surgery For Dummies" and she said it's informative yet entertaining :) I am optimistic at this point. She wants me to continue to jump through the hoops, and she continued to remind me that I am not obligated to commit to this and even once the surgery is scheduled I can cancel it at any time, even the day before the surgery if my feet get too cold ;) Apparently Sweden has done studies on people whom are 20+ years out and they have a significantly decreased death rate from cardiac related deaths and incidence of cancer. I would love to read some of these studies as so many people in my every day life tell me that this is so new, blah blah blah, we don't know what it will do to you 10 or 20 years down the road. I'd enjoy battling them with the Swedish statistics and show them that yes we do know and this is why.

I am glad to hear it went well :) And thanks for the info I had no idea about the swedish studies.

Just keep with it girl and when the time comes you'll know what you need to do for you. I say keep researching , asking questions so that you are prepared should you go through with it. :)

  • Author

I am glad to hear it went well :) And thanks for the info I had no idea about the swedish studies.

Just keep with it girl and when the time comes you'll know what you need to do for you. I say keep researching , asking questions so that you are prepared should you go through with it. :)

Thank you soooo much for your support and encouragement. It truly means a lot to me, I have a lot of negative people in my life which I am assuming will change when/if I do go through with the surgery, I have heard of many people whose friends turned out not to truly be their friends but in fact their frenemies, or significant others whom just couldn't handle the new and improved partner. It's a breath of fresh air to come on here and actually be supported and encouraged no matter what decision I make!

Nicci I did too! I read iggychic thread and I chickened out:( I just pushed my date back til January

Sent from my SCH-R530U using VST

Thank you soooo much for your support and encouragement. It truly means a lot to me, I have a lot of negative people in my life which I am assuming will change when/if I do go through with the surgery, I have heard of many people whose friends turned out not to truly be their friends but in fact their frenemies, or significant others whom just couldn't handle the new and improved partner. It's a breath of fresh air to come on here and actually be supported and encouraged no matter what decision I make!

No problem, if you ever need anything to vent ask questions you can reach out to me. I haven't been sleeved yet but have been looking around a lot and doing a lot of searching so I am willing to help if I can.

It is unfortunate how some people just will not be happy for the new you, it is a shame but at the same time hey, that is 'extra weight" that you no longer have to carry around :)

You know, honestly no one can make this choice for you it is something only you can do. We can offer you our opinions, advice and just share our experiences to help you see all sides. Anyway you look at it we are here to help support you ( I love this board , just like a big family) :)

  • Author

Nicci I did too! I read iggychic thread and I chickened out:( I just pushed my date back til January

Sent from my SCH-R530U using VST

Yup, that's the one that ALMOST did me in. I am slowly finding some confidence in going through with this, I have even spoken with "Iggy" via private messages and she said even knowing what she does now she would still encourage me to do it simply because of where I'm at (321...although today at the doc it was 320, lol hey 1lb counts man!), and that she was much smaller than I when she initiated this process.

What horror stories have you heard???

Based on my research and my own personal experience I KNOW I made the right decision!

I have done so well my husband, two co-workers, and a friend followed in my footsteps and had the surgery and all have been so happy!

I love this. Young fly and flashy! Haha...lol

LOL! Hell yeah. Misery loves company but I'm NOT RSVP'ing to that party. I don't care if I weighed 800 pounds, I'd still be as fly as an 800 pound person can be. Guinness Book...World's Flyest Woman!

Nicci, glad to hear it went well for you.

LOL! Hell yeah. Misery loves company but I'm NOT RSVP'ing to that party. I don't care if I weighed 800 pounds' date=' I'd still be as fly as an 800 pound person can be. Guinness Book...World's Flyest Woman!

Nicci, glad to hear it went well for you.[/quote']

You go girl!! I actually had a blog youngphatandflashy@blogspot.com but haven't been keeping up on it:/ where is your pic at girl!

Hi there! Just to let you know, I chickened out also. My surgery was tentatively scheduled for 9/11, and I cancelled it. I am terrified!! I decided then to exercise and try a 1200 calorie low carb diet. Have I done that yet..... NO! I have 90 pounds to lose to be at my perfect weight. I'm 34 years old, a mother of 3 kids under 13 years old and I am terrified of having something go wrong with surgery. This sounds silly, but I gave thin hair, and I'm terrified of the hair loss as well. I keep saying to my self "what it". What if I'm that small % that has a problem. Other than being fat, I have zero co morbidities. What if I have problems from the surgery?? I do not know what to do. I know EXACTLY how u feel. In fact, I'm following another sleever on the site named Iggy. She's had a horrible time. Her posts helped me in chickening out.

I just finished reading all your posts and funny enough, you spoke about Iggy too. Her story was the icing on the cake for me. Poor poor woman! I don't want to end up like that!

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