Hi, everyone here is so inspiring and helpful. I have been reading peoples post for weeks now while I have been going to all my doctors appointments and have been getting some great advice. I even had to get my gall blader out and I didn't care because I knew after everything I was going to have my surgery. Now I finally have a date Nov 1 and I'm having second thoughts. Even my family are saying things that aren't very helpful. I think deep down I know I really want to do this but how come I'm feeling so upset about it? I also already miss my comforting friends; pizza, vanilla cake, and wine. I'm I crazy? Please I would love some feedback,

Janine

No, you are not crazy. Many of us go through exactly what you are describing. You are getting ready to change your relationship with food and your body FOREVER! Why wouldn't you be evaulating your decision???

I think it's very healthy and natural. Just trust your research, your surgeon, and yourself. You will make the right choice!

Hi, everyone here is so inspiring and helpful. I have been reading peoples post for weeks now while I have been going to all my doctors appointments and have been getting some great advice. I even had to get my gall blader out and I didn't care because I knew after everything I was going to have my surgery. Now I finally have a date Nov 1 and I'm having second thoughts. Even my family are saying things that aren't very helpful. I think deep down I know I really want to do this but how come I'm feeling so upset about it? I also already miss my comforting friends; pizza, vanilla cake, and wine. I'm I crazy? Please I would love some feedback,

Janine

Dear Jay, You are not alone, i too am being revised from band to sleeve on the first and I am so scared, my boyfriend ( feel funny saying that, since i am 54yrs old) is giving me a hard time and saying things like something could happen, it s non reversible, your too old..blah, blah blah....I end up doubting my decision and wonder if i am being extreme in my decision. but then i remember what it was like before i lost my initial 60 lbs with the band and i could never go back to that. i have had a prolapse and a revision of the band and in the last 6 months gained back 40 lbs of the 104 i initially lost and i know if i dont do something, i will be back to where i was 2 1/2 years ago...i feel like screaming when he starts on me day after day, but i have to have faith in God, my surgeon and myself. Our old friend pizza will hopefully be replaced by something much more healthy, and just as satisfying..stay strong and do what you believe is right for you and you can always call on me and everyone else on this site for support if your not getting it at home...hugs to you, keep me posted and i'll be thinking of you on our surgery day...lol ~vicki~

I just got approved today and I have so many emotions. I have used food as my escape for do many years. I have hid from the world under these layers of fat. And let's not forget the fear of failure. I keep reminding myself, that I have tried this on my own for years. Lose weight then gain it back. We finally have a tool that is going to help us win the fight against food and ourselves for that matter. I think it is only natural to grieve the loss of our favorite comfort foods. I know that I want to be a fun mom and be able to do things that I have avoided for years. I want to be able to shop in normal stores. I want to be happy when I look in the mirror.

Family and friends can be unsupportive because they're worried or because they don't understand the process or your position.

We all go through this, and we all grieve the loss of our comforting food friends. The fact is, you need to decide if you hate being fat more than you love those foods. They aren't gone forever, so take heart in that. They're out for now, and for a while post op, but as you learn better eating habits you'll find you crave those foods less. Once you're at that point it's not hard to have them in moderation. The sleeve is going to make the moderation thing a LOT easier. If you're not starving all the time it's much easier to be satisfied with a small glass of wine or a single slice of pizza.

Don't talk yourself out of this procedure. Your fears are normal, and I promise, they'll be easier to deal with post op.

~Cheri

Hi again, thank you for your replies, they are encouraging and makes me think I'm not crazy for feeling depressed now. I'm usually so postive but I'm just worried, I guess. Even today my sister in law came over (I'm divorced but I'm close with my in laws) and she said "I wish you were doing the band and I could get sepsis" and on and on. My mother died from septic shock after kidney surgery, but she had a lot of health issues.

I just have to keep myself busy ths week. Vicki, I just saw we are doing are surgery on the same date, how are you feeliing?

Janine

Hi Jay9mal

I´m going to have the surgery on november 1st also, don´t let people discourage you, I´m going trough the same thing with some of my friends but that´s just their way to express their concern for what they see as a mayor surgery and maybe even a risk, I think that´s the case with you, too. Please remember that if anyone really has to live with you it´s yourself, so do what you think it´s best for you

Hope everything goes great with us both

Don't get discouraged - I am having my surgery one day after you! I was very worried about what people say and I really wasn't in the mood for some "If you'd only apply yourself, you could do it without surgery speeches" but everyone was very supportive. I told most people that I have been trying to lose weight for 20 years with every trick and method I had up my sleeve. Everyone know how being overweight has made me unhappy, and they want me to be happy.

As for your "friends", they haven't been good friends. This may be a harsh comparison, but they were your enablers. You will find new friends! You can be friends with your bicycle, with your treadmill, with your Water bottle, with the stairs you always dreaded so much! You can be friends with the departments store - that store that used to tucked you and your stuff away in some back corner. Imagine walking into the departments store and being able to pick something off the first rack you see and not having to ask a skinny mini sales clerk for the "fat chick department". You may actually become friends with your biggest enemy, the scale!

Those are the things that I am thinking off.

Don't get me wrong, just yesterday I was sad thinking that I won't have a burger for the next few months. A friend sent me a message telling me she misses me and we should go out for dinner and cocktails - but she also said she'd sit with me on the couch with a glass of water and a cracker :-)

Chin up (and if you are like me, this will soon really just be ONE chin), you are the only supporter you need, and once people see your transition, they have to get on board with it!

All the best

Susanne

Some good advice have been given

Just wanted to say, that I am sure that many of us overweight people feel the same way. We need to say goodbye to our comforting food.

An example: My sister had a Bypass in may, and have been treated for Binge eating disorder - and or just overeating.

I have some of the same problems. She still has a few issues, but it is nothing compared to before the surgery.

We can still eat a LITTLE of everything. And we need to be comforted in other ways - find new coping strategies.

I am trying to TALK with my friends, meditate, sleep and get massages, instead of eating.

These week I am saying goodbye to my old comfortfood - will be operated 30th of November.

Family and friends - it is also difficult for them, taht YOU change. Will you still be the same? Will you still give them attention?

Or mayby they think that it is a HUGE operation?

We are all different. I have the same thoughts as you. But I am looking forward to be operated, to have a tool and some help with my overeating. (And will have some therapy as well - for the fifth time :-))

HUGS

Thank you for everyone's advice, I did listen to it. I bascally let people who were being negitive know I was doing this, I'm excited and I do not want to hear anything that was going to upset me. It worked!

I think I can deal with not having certain foods for a while but I need to know once in while I can treat myself. I read one women's post said she has pizza once a week, that's will be me.

Thank you again, everyone here is so amazing and helpful,

Janine

Janine,

Don't be scared everything will be fine! People tell the same kind of horror stories during pregnancy and just think of this like that. You will be able to eat your favorite foods in moderation and who really cares what you are eating when you are skinny?

I am also getting sleeved on Nov 1. Very excited but at the same time a little nervous! Good luck to you Janine and let's hope for a speedy recovery!