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Pre-Op Jitters/negative People

So, the moment has finally arrived. I can pretty much pick my surgery date, a moment I've been awaiting for a long time. However, my family is immensely against me having the surgery, and are filling my head with horrible negative thoughts. I don't believe them, but it still hurts me, and Im a mess right now. Im hoping to get some support from this forum

Thank you all, good luck in your journey.

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  • There will always be negative people. I put off surgery a year because I let people get to me. My nutritionist told me I could get sick being over weight or make a change to try and improve my health.

  • Listen sometimes you can not listen to family and friends when it comes to making you happy and healthy. I wouldnt say you will be a completely new you in six months because well that is just unreaso

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So' date=' the moment has finally arrived. I can pretty much pick my surgery date, a moment I've been awaiting for a long time. However, my family is immensely against me having the surgery, and are filling my head with horrible negative thoughts. I don't believe them, but it still hurts me, and Im a mess right now. Im hoping to get some support from this forum

Thank you all, good luck in your journey.[/quote']

the heck with your family. your choice your body. all the support you need is gonna be the new you in 6 months. your family will come around when they see you happy and joyful. let no one rain on your parade.

  • Author

Thank you so much. They keep saying it will have horrible damaging long term effects on my body, ect...and that I'll be sick every day, develop hernias..ugh..did u have the surgery? How has the experience been? I don't know anyone who has had it.

Thank you so much. They keep saying it will have horrible damaging long term effects on my body' date=' ect...and that I'll be sick every day, develop hernias..ugh..did u have the surgery? How has the experience been? I don't know anyone who has had it.[/quote']

i myself just got approved today and will select the date tomorrow but I have been thinking about it for the past 3 years at least. i am sure other veterans will reply to you and give advice post op but what I can tell you is no one should be against you living a more healthier life.

There will always be negative people. I put off surgery a year because I let people get to me. My nutritionist told me I could get sick being over weight or make a change to try and improve my health. I was banded 2/1/12 and have lost 90lbs. I'm not going to lie and say its a breeze. But I feel so much better now. I'm off all my medications and can actually run. Lol huge personal accomplishment

Listen sometimes you can not listen to family and friends when it comes to making you happy and healthy. I wouldnt say you will be a completely new you in six months because well that is just unreasonable to think that but you will definitely be a better you. Depending on how much you have to lose. I would say in six months you can be down 60lbs or 70 if you follow the right plan your doctor puts in place for you. Its not their choice its yours and if you have health issues would they rather see you in a not so good place. Have the surgery, follow the rules then you wont be at risk for slippage or erosion.

I'm sorry to hear you're going through this. My surgery is in 2 weeks and I've told 6 ppl, including my parents. Everyone has been supportive for the most part, however I have heard "you should get these new appetite suppressants" & "I'm afraid for you going through surgery". But once these ppl heard I was confident in my decision & actually had a surgery date, they hushed. They've expressed their support and zipped their lips on anything else. I think it is a respect issue. Your family, while they may be concerned for you, needs to accept that this is your life and your decision. You are your own judge & jury. Let them know that you love & respect them, but you've made your decision. Let them know you need support or silence. Best of luck.

Okay I'm going to lay it on the line. Ask yourself how would they handle caring for you if you had a stroke. I had a stroke at 39 trust me it was not a joke. This is the life or death decision at least for me it was.

  • 2 weeks later...

I can relate. I have only told a handful of people. My husband, kids, sister and 3 friends. The friends have either had lapband or they are going through the process to have it. I have researched this for years and with my doctors help and support, I know this is the right decision for me. I don't need the negative comments going into this so, I chose not to tell many people. I figure once I lose weight and they SEE how much better I feel and see the difference it has made, I will tell a few others. I am not going to volunteer the information to random people, only to those closest to me. People are just too judgemental and at this time in my life, I don't need that.

Most of my family was supportive, but both of my daughters were opposed to surgery. I think they were just afraid for me. I told them that I could more easily die from the complications of obesity. I now it sounds harsh, but they do not live with what you do day to day. For once it is time to be selfish and put yourself first. They will come around, when they realize the result is the same person you always were just thinner and healthier!

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