(I posted this on another thread but decided to start a new one so noone would think it was pointed at them personally.)

I'm sorry but I have finally reached a point, after reading so many posts about disappointments in weight loss, that I have to get some things off my chest. And please, this isn't meant to make anyone in particular feel bad, it's to help me understand why anyone would -want- to stuff themselves with a quarterpounder and large chips (fries) or 3 slices of pizza or tacos and burritos when they have gone thru weight loss surgery to get their cherished lapband?? Why do people have to 'test' their bands by stuffing in as much as they can to see what the limits are?

This isn't just about restricting how much you can manage to cram into yourself. It's about lifestyle changes. It's about eating reasonably and the band is there to HELP you. Not magically change quarter pounders, pizza, tacos and burritos into "health food." Your band WILL NOT MAKE YOU LOSE WEIGHT. If you do not change how you eat, you will be here a year from now posting similair questions.. if you still have your band.

Think about this. A quarter pounder has 530 calories and 30 grams of fat. A large order of chips (fries) 542 calories and 26 grams of fat. Three slices of pan pizza (I'll even go veggie on this to show my point) has 810 calories and 36 grams of fat. And now, just for interest's sake - three slices of pan supreme pizza has 960 calories and 51 grams of fat.

This is -tough- love coming from a very obese woman who is desperately trying to understand what drives us to ruin our health. What drives us to take such chances? To push the envelope. We all know we'll be upset when we fail, or when we end up with diabetes, or worse.

*sighs* I know you all have the intelligence to make wiser choices. You know youre banded. Don't go out without some emergency food with you if you think youre going to be starving before you can get home. Starkist makes great tuna lunch packs that are great for in the car.

Damnit, why do I always feel so responsible. I just couldn't let this go without shouting to you all... What are you doing to yourselves??? Stop!!

This was written with pure love and a heavy heart. I want ALL of us to be free of this damn weight so we can really live! Wake up and start living people!

I totally see where you are comming from.

I guess it is just hard for some people to adjust to the new lifestyle. Some people never do. It took some time for me to give up all of my charming habbits that I had formed over a life time.

Old habbits die hard. KWIM?

I never knew the lady personly but she and a friend went out the day after surgery and had pizza. one got lucky and just hurt really bad, the other lady had to have surgery that night because she ripped stiches .

pay good money and go into self destruct mode.

i just wish my mother and mother in law would stop showing up with Cookies and cake every weekend. They leave 'em and i throw 'em away.

and yes ive asked and told them to knock it off.

i just wish my mother and mother in law would stop showing up with Cookies and cake every weekend. They leave 'em and i throw 'em away.

and yes ive asked and told them to knock it off.

Its funny you say that... My MIL just sent us a 5lb tin of butter cookies

:heh: I am re-gifting them to my sons class tomorrow.

Its funny you say that... My MIL just sent us a 5lb tin of butter Cookies

:heh: I am re-gifting them to my sons class tomorrow.

my little girl is only 6 months old so i cant do that yet,,,,,,,but one day,,

You are so right!! I have to say though that now that I am waiting to be rebanded I have had a qtr pounder and a few fries. I can eat what I want and since I have to go through this all over again I'm feeling stupidly sorry for myself about it and want to comfort myself.

This is a head game as much as a calorie thing. And sometimes it is ok to give ourselves permission to eat what we really want, just not everyday all the time and hge portions

i just wish my mother and mother in law would stop showing up with Cookies and cake every weekend. They leave 'em and i throw 'em away.

and yes ive asked and told them to knock it off.

This is another point to consider as well. Not only do we have to rethink how we eat and relearn and retrain our minds but we have to do the same for our family and friends.

For years we have been conditioning ourselves and our family and friends that we eat a certain way. It takes us a long time to recondition ourselves to not eat that way anymore. So it stands to reason that we would have to retrain our friends and family as well.

Gentle and persistent persuasion is what it takes.

This is a head game as much as a calorie thing. And sometimes it is ok to give ourselves permission to eat what we really want, just not everyday all the time and hge portions

I have learned that if I deviate the least little bit from my plan I am screwed. I keep telling myself that just this once won't hurt. If you can deviate and then get back on track then I applaud you. I simply can't deviate at all.

But think about it this way, would you tell an alcoholic or a drug addict that it is ok to give themselves permission to drink or do that drug because it is not in a huge portion?

You are so right!! I have to say though that now that I am waiting to be rebanded I have had a qtr pounder and a few fries. I can eat what I want and since I have to go through this all over again I'm feeling stupidly sorry for myself about it and want to comfort myself.

I can see that. You don't have a band in. I'm talking about people who have the band in place.

Good luck with your rebanding. And why are you feeling sorry for yourself? You are a brave person who is determined to live a long and healthy life. Be proud of yourself and get excited about being slender and feeling great about yourself.

Nothing tastes as good as seeing a healthy YOU in the mirror feels.

my little girl is only 6 months old so i cant do that yet,,,,,,,but one day,,

If you can't regift the goodies left at your house then take them to a homeless shelter. Or give them to the church food closet. GET them outta the house. Simply throw them out. Yes, we see it as wasting food, and we all hear out mothers saying, "Starving children in (fill in the blank)." THROW IT OUT!!!

Or if they just feel compeled to bring something give them a list of acceptible items ( like fruit, fresh veggies, etc ).

It's about lifestyle changes. It's about eating reasonably and the band is there to HELP you. Not magically change quarter pounders, pizza, tacos and burritos into "health food."

Well said!

Gentle and persistent persuasion is what it takes.

a trait ive never been known for.

If you can't regift the goodies left at your house then take them to a homeless shelter. Or give them to the church food closet. GET them outta the house. Simply throw them out. Yes, we see it as wasting food, and we all hear out mothers saying, "Starving children in (fill in the blank)." THROW IT OUT!!!

Or if they just feel compeled to bring something give them a list of acceptible items ( like fruit, fresh veggies, etc ).

i have 5 acres, the wild life eats well at my house

I know that we all face the family members who just DONT GET IT and keep bringing their offerings of love and good feelings. But MY point is why do some go out in search of the food that will harm them and then sit down and force themselves to eat beyond what they know they should eat to prevent band/stomach damage, PBs, and weight loss failure?

Fine the MIL brings Cookies. Look at your family and tell them Grandma is trying to kill us with kindness and then throw it in the trash. If it's not good for you, why is it good for someone else? LOL

(I'm kidding about the Grandma is trying to kill us bit)

so are you all saying that since you have been banded that u HAVENT had anything thats not healthy??

im sure most ppl would of

its more a head issue thing

Or if they just feel compeled to bring something give them a list of acceptible items ( like fruit, fresh veggies, etc ).

Not long after my surgery, I ate something at MILs house that had me sliming for hours.. NOT her fault, but it was the only thing in the house kinda thing (And I was fairly new to solids at that stage too).

Soon after that I drew up a list of the kinds of things I can eat.

I thought this would offend her, but she was happy to know, so she could stock her fridge with "bandster" type foods.