NtvTxn

Unfortunately our surgeons operate on our tummy and don't finish up with our head. I have been at goal for 3 years, maintaining for 2.5 years and STILL do NOT see myself like others do. I've been in size 4's and 6's for a few years now and I still will hold a pair of jeans up, fresh out of the dryer and think "NO DAMN WAY can I get my fat @$$ in these" and then I do.....I never have to lay down on the bed to button and zip them. I'm called skinny, tiny, thin and still, the fat girl inside giggles and wants to ask, "Are you talking to ME??" I don't know if it will ever change and I don't know if the fear of waking up 25 lbs heavier will ever go away. A doctor told me though "A little paranoia is good"
It's nice being normal sized, even if we don't feel like it, we can look around and in our head, we know we aren't the biggest girl in the room. You are not alone, I think the head games are something we all struggle with. We are women, we critique ourselves and focus on the thing (s) that bother us. Others don't even notice and that's all we see. Take heart, you are more than likely the ONLY one seeing what you do!!!
Good luck and happy Thanksgiving!

Unfortunately our surgeons operate on our tummy and don't finish up with our head. I have been at goal for 3 years, maintaining for 2.5 years and STILL do NOT see myself like others do. I've been in size 4's and 6's for a few years now and I still will hold a pair of jeans up, fresh out of the dryer and think "NO DAMN WAY can I get my fat @$$ in these" and then I do.....I never have to lay down on the bed to button and zip them. I'm called skinny, tiny, thin and still, the fat girl inside giggles and wants to ask, "Are you talking to ME??" I don't know if it will ever change and I don't know if the fear of waking up 25 lbs heavier will ever go away. A doctor told me though "A little paranoia is good"
It's nice being normal sized, even if we don't feel like it, we can look around and in our head, we know we aren't the biggest girl in the room. You are not alone, I think the head games are something we all struggle with. We are women, we critique ourselves and focus on the thing (s) that bother us. Others don't even notice and that's all we see. Take heart, you are more than likely the ONLY one seeing what you do!!!
Good luck and happy Thanksgiving!

Unfortunately our surgeons operate on our tummy and don't finish up with our head. I have been at goal for 3 years, maintaining for 2.5 years and STILL do NOT see myself like others do. I've been in size 4's and 6's for a few years now and I still will hold a pair of jeans up, fresh out of the dryer and think "NO DAMN WAY can I get my fat @$$ in these" and then I do.....I never have to lay down on the bed to button and zip them. I'm called skinny, tiny, thin and still, the fat girl inside giggles and wants to ask, "Are you talking to ME??" I don't know if it will ever change and I don't know if the fear of waking up 25 lbs heavier will ever go away. A doctor told me though "A little paranoia is good"
It's nice being normal sized, even if we don't feel like it, we can look around and in our head, we know we aren't the biggest girl in the room. You are not alone, I think the head games are something we all struggle with. We are women, we critique ourselves and focus on the thing (s) that bother us. Others don't even notice and that's all we see. Take heart, you are more than likely the ONLY one seeing what you do!!!
Good luck and happy Thanksgiving!

Oh lord!! I can't even imagine being skinny! I'm just trying to feel NORMAL sized. :faint:
So what is skinny anyways?

Unfortunately our surgeons operate on our tummy and don't finish up with our head. I have been at goal for 3 years, maintaining for 2.5 years and STILL do NOT see myself like others do. I've been in size 4's and 6's for a few years now and I still will hold a pair of jeans up, fresh out of the dryer and think "NO DAMN WAY can I get my fat @$$ in these" and then I do.....I never have to lay down on the bed to button and zip them. I'm called skinny, tiny, thin and still, the fat girl inside giggles and wants to ask, "Are you talking to ME??" I don't know if it will ever change and I don't know if the fear of waking up 25 lbs heavier will ever go away. A doctor told me though "A little paranoia is good"
It's nice being normal sized, even if we don't feel like it, we can look around and in our head, we know we aren't the biggest girl in the room. You are not alone, I think the head games are something we all struggle with. We are women, we critique ourselves and focus on the thing (s) that bother us. Others don't even notice and that's all we see. Take heart, you are more than likely the ONLY one seeing what you do!!!
Good luck and happy Thanksgiving!

To date, I've lost 91 pounds. At a smidge under 5'3", I've gone from a tight size 20 to a comfy size 12 pants, from a 2x (42DDD) top to a L (36D). I weighed 263.4 at my highest, I am 172.2 as of this morning. I still have 23.2 pounds to go to my personal goal but that's a number I just picked out of my ass, with absolutely no idea what that's going to look like or where I really want to end up.

I'm just realizing what a delusional fat person I was before. I could look at myself in my bathroom mirror thinking I looked good. I had my "skinny" days quite often where I went out with my head held high thinking no one could possibly see how morbidly obese I was. At the same time, I always tucked myself in the back of pictures if I wasn't offering to take them. As one of the shorter people, that was no easy task as everyone tried to shove me up front. (As if they could move THIS mountain! HA!) The result from this is that I have very few pictures to compare my current body size to.
Now, my head is telling me that I am "normal" sized. I am no longer the largest size in the store. I am no longer the largest person in the room anywhere I go. When I go shopping with friends who I've always considered average in stature, I am in their size or one smaller. I can pick up clothes and think that there is no fuckeding way that my assed will fit in that and it does. I am not skinny by any stretch of the imagination but I do think that I am fit. I am no longer afraid of a fitness class. I am no longer afraid of a day of hiking in the apple orchards. I am no longer afraid of a marathon day in hot weather at the park with the kids and the dog. I can easily jog in place for 45 minutes while I teach a kickboxing class joining in seamlessly whenever I care to without losing my breath. I am willing to try new exercises not caring what I look like and no longer making the excuse that I am uncoordinated so I can't possible try. All that said...

I CAN'T SEE IT. I JUST CAN'T SEE IT!!! I am in constant doubt that I really am normal sized. I am in constant doubt that I am not still the big girl. I look at pictures of myself and while I know in my head I look better, all I can actually see is my fat thighs and the roll that's still apparent around my belly. I used to be able to pick up an article of clothing and know if it would fit and now I am terrified of being disappointed because it's too small because I am so unaware of my body size.I am constantly trying to compare myself to everyone around me, not because I want to tear them down and make myself feel better but because I want to see what everyone else sees. I am dying to ask everyone around me what size they wear, how much they weigh, if I can take a picture next to them so I can compare. I restrain myself, but it's hard. It's really really hard. You know how when you hear yourself on a recording, it's bizarre because that's not what you sound like in your head? You know how you can't hear your own accent? That's how I feel about my appearance. I can't see it.
I am not fishing for compliments. I am not asking for reassurance because intellectually I know I am getting there. I just want to know when my self awareness will catch up with my actual being.
ARGH!!!!! HELP ME!

go back to basics, what you did to lose that 75 pounds. This is what I do that works for me. I cal it my dashboard, the numbers tell me if something needs to be changed.
1) I weigh every morning
2) I weigh and/or measure my food
3) I log my food on my fitness pal
4) I attend a real live support group
I'm almost 3.5 years out and I've been maintaining for almost 3 years. I can't imagine not doing these things. They're as natural to me as breathing. My new normal, my new life. For me, there is a fine line between maintenance, gaining and losing. I must never become complacent. I have a comfort zone, a 3.5 pound comfort zone. If I'm up about the high end of that zone, I just cut back calories by 100 - 150 for a few days and it's gone. You can do this!

My surgeon was Dr. James Davidson, surgery was at Forest Park Medical Center in Dallas, Texas. ( he has the Center of Excellence stamp of approval) As previously stated, Forest Park is a state of the art private hospital for cash pay patients. Dr. Davidson's insurance patients are treated at Presbyterian Hosptial in Dallas, which is an excellent hospital as well. I highly recommend him as well as his entire team, they're a great group!!

go back to basics, what you did to lose that 75 pounds. This is what I do that works for me. I cal it my dashboard, the numbers tell me if something needs to be changed.
1) I weigh every morning
2) I weigh and/or measure my food
3) I log my food on my fitness pal
4) I attend a real live support group
I'm almost 3.5 years out and I've been maintaining for almost 3 years. I can't imagine not doing these things. They're as natural to me as breathing. My new normal, my new life. For me, there is a fine line between maintenance, gaining and losing. I must never become complacent. I have a comfort zone, a 3.5 pound comfort zone. If I'm up about the high end of that zone, I just cut back calories by 100 - 150 for a few days and it's gone. You can do this!

go back to basics, what you did to lose that 75 pounds. This is what I do that works for me. I cal it my dashboard, the numbers tell me if something needs to be changed.
1) I weigh every morning
2) I weigh and/or measure my food
3) I log my food on my fitness pal
4) I attend a real live support group
I'm almost 3.5 years out and I've been maintaining for almost 3 years. I can't imagine not doing these things. They're as natural to me as breathing. My new normal, my new life. For me, there is a fine line between maintenance, gaining and losing. I must never become complacent. I have a comfort zone, a 3.5 pound comfort zone. If I'm up about the high end of that zone, I just cut back calories by 100 - 150 for a few days and it's gone. You can do this!

go back to basics, what you did to lose that 75 pounds. This is what I do that works for me. I cal it my dashboard, the numbers tell me if something needs to be changed.
1) I weigh every morning
2) I weigh and/or measure my food
3) I log my food on my fitness pal
4) I attend a real live support group
I'm almost 3.5 years out and I've been maintaining for almost 3 years. I can't imagine not doing these things. They're as natural to me as breathing. My new normal, my new life. For me, there is a fine line between maintenance, gaining and losing. I must never become complacent. I have a comfort zone, a 3.5 pound comfort zone. If I'm up about the high end of that zone, I just cut back calories by 100 - 150 for a few days and it's gone. You can do this!

go back to basics, what you did to lose that 75 pounds. This is what I do that works for me. I cal it my dashboard, the numbers tell me if something needs to be changed.
1) I weigh every morning
2) I weigh and/or measure my food
3) I log my food on my fitness pal
4) I attend a real live support group
I'm almost 3.5 years out and I've been maintaining for almost 3 years. I can't imagine not doing these things. They're as natural to me as breathing. My new normal, my new life. For me, there is a fine line between maintenance, gaining and losing. I must never become complacent. I have a comfort zone, a 3.5 pound comfort zone. If I'm up about the high end of that zone, I just cut back calories by 100 - 150 for a few days and it's gone. You can do this!

Good morning! I am so sorry about the weight gain. All I can tell you is what I do, what I've done from the beginning. For me it is a total lifestyle change, as natural to me as breathing. I call this my 'dashboard'.
1) I weigh EVERY day. I KNOW how quickly I could gain eight or ten pounds, and that would be overwhelming to me. If I'm up a pound or two, I just make a change or two and it's gone in several days.
2) I weigh and/or measure my food when I am at home (eye ball it carefully when out)
3) I log my food on my fitness pal. Before discovering MFP, I used fitday.com and at the VERY beginning, I have a spiral notebook and wrote it down.
4) I attend support groups
My comfort zone is 142 - 145, I weigh first thing in the morning, out of bed, go to the bathroom and on the scale. A pound or two is manageable, but for me, I cannot go by how my jeans fit, by that time I'd be up ten pounds and it would take me a few months to get that off, I'm sure of it. I must track my calorie, there is a fine line for me between maintaining, gaining and losing. I've been doing this for over 2.5 years, so I've got the hang of it, but I can never be complacent. Like I said, this is my new normal. This is why I call what I do, my dashboard, if a 'light' comes on, and to me, being up a couple of pounds, or my calories being above what I need.....those are my lights. I just change things up a little, meaning, I lower my calories by 100 -150 and that takes care of it.
Make sense? My advice is, find something that works for you, something you can do forever, there is no end date, we've made a lifetime commitment.....and make it part of your life. Good luck, you can do this.

Good morning! I am so sorry about the weight gain. All I can tell you is what I do, what I've done from the beginning. For me it is a total lifestyle change, as natural to me as breathing. I call this my 'dashboard'.
1) I weigh EVERY day. I KNOW how quickly I could gain eight or ten pounds, and that would be overwhelming to me. If I'm up a pound or two, I just make a change or two and it's gone in several days.
2) I weigh and/or measure my food when I am at home (eye ball it carefully when out)
3) I log my food on my fitness pal. Before discovering MFP, I used fitday.com and at the VERY beginning, I have a spiral notebook and wrote it down.
4) I attend support groups
My comfort zone is 142 - 145, I weigh first thing in the morning, out of bed, go to the bathroom and on the scale. A pound or two is manageable, but for me, I cannot go by how my jeans fit, by that time I'd be up ten pounds and it would take me a few months to get that off, I'm sure of it. I must track my calorie, there is a fine line for me between maintaining, gaining and losing. I've been doing this for over 2.5 years, so I've got the hang of it, but I can never be complacent. Like I said, this is my new normal. This is why I call what I do, my dashboard, if a 'light' comes on, and to me, being up a couple of pounds, or my calories being above what I need.....those are my lights. I just change things up a little, meaning, I lower my calories by 100 -150 and that takes care of it.
Make sense? My advice is, find something that works for you, something you can do forever, there is no end date, we've made a lifetime commitment.....and make it part of your life. Good luck, you can do this.

It may be 'just a number' to some, but to me, it goes far beyond a number. It's part of my dashboard, that number let's me know what's going on 'under the hood'. That number is like a red light coming on in my truck. It lets me know if something needs to be checked or changed. Like you, if I don't see a certain number, or less (in my case it is 142 - 145) I take action, not a big deal, all I have to do is cut calories by 100-150 and the extra pound or two is gone in just a few days. It's as easy as that. I cannot become complacent, in my book, that is a slippery slope and I know how quickly I can slide!!

You won't believe what your life will be like, one year after surgery!!! Good luck & hold on tight, it's a wild ride...enjoy every minute of it!!!!

Yes i did go through this....my daughters and husband were all freaking out - people don't know what to say, and if they're use to seeing you big, then to you, you're pencil thin. In my case, I WAS and did not see it until I needed to gain a little back. Say "thank you, I'm almost there" or "I'm finished" unless of course you want to talk about it.

Lets stay in touch guys, if there is a forum for us already please point me to it, otherwise, I'll start:
Surgery date: 10/23/13
Highest weight: 283
Surgery weight: 277
Current weight: 271 (1week post op)
Pre op meds vs post op meds:
type 2 diabetes pre op-2 insulins 2 pills/
post op-1 pill only 1/2 the pre surgery dose- still on high cholesterol meds but I suspect that will change after my pcp follow up.
I am struggling to not get on the scale until my 2 wk post op, 3 days to go I'll keep you guys posted. Gas/constipation is my biggest complaint. Getting down all of my liquids and Protein is my biggest struggle. Staying positive is my biggest accomplishment....
VSG ON 3....1 2 3 VSG!!!! Let's get it!!!!

My scale was going up and down four or five pounds daily for about 10 days, and I knew it couldn't be accurate. I changed the battery and it went back to normal.

Hey my fellow sleeve victims.
I had my 18 month post op follow up visit today. Nothing unusual to report. Everything is fine. I've lost 83% of my excess body weight and gone from a BMI of 52 to 28. It's hard to believe I can it's been 18 months, time flies. But it's been a great time and the best decision I've ever made. This pic I think says it all.

Laughed out loud!!!! They're are all funny, but the ammo shortage really cracked me up!!
To entertain myself I thought up bad answers to frequently asked questions posed to WLS people:
"Is the food OK?" (asked because you ate so little)

Oh, yes, I haven't had food this good since the Turkish prison.


"Isn't weight loss surgery the easy way out?"

Yes, it is. I was going to shoot everyone smaller than me to make myself look average but there is an ammo shortage.

You wise guys got any?

Laughed out loud!!!! They're are all funny, but the ammo shortage really cracked me up!!
To entertain myself I thought up bad answers to frequently asked questions posed to WLS people:
"Is the food OK?" (asked because you ate so little)

Oh, yes, I haven't had food this good since the Turkish prison.


"Isn't weight loss surgery the easy way out?"

Yes, it is. I was going to shoot everyone smaller than me to make myself look average but there is an ammo shortage.

You wise guys got any?

To entertain myself I thought up bad answers to frequently asked questions posed to WLS people:
"Is the food OK?" (asked because you ate so little)

Oh, yes, I haven't had food this good since the Turkish prison.


"Isn't weight loss surgery the easy way out?"

Yes, it is. I was going to shoot everyone smaller than me to make myself look average but there is an ammo shortage.


"How did you get so fat in the first place?"

I was stranded on an island with a group of sumo wrestlers. I had the only gun. A year later I was the only one left.


"How could you afford this operation?"

Well, I got this e-mail from a Nigerian widow...


"How could you do this to yourself?'

I originally wanted to do it to you but couldn't get a Brazilian visa.


"How did you lose so much weight?"

I sent myself in a suitcase on American Airlines. They lost it.


"How did you get those scars on your belly?"

Picked up by a Pterodactyl.
You wise guys got any?

I'm more than three years out. Outside of pregnancy, I've stayed within 5% of my goal weight.
Some people can't track. Some people have to do it. I have to do it.
I think the biggest thing is to stay disciplined. Weigh daily. If you don't know what the scale says, you can easily slip into denial about weight gain until your pants are too tight.
I may eat whatever I want, but I choose wisely about 99% of the time. I can't rely on my sleeve to keep me thin despite myself. I have to think about my food, I prefer to plan my meals and I must weigh myself daily. I cannot just "wing it" for long periods of time or my eating habits get sloppy again.
I have decades of disordered eating behind me. I have only three years of being a normal weight and making mostly good choices under my belt. If I leave it up to my habits to see me through, I'm going to find myself with a regain and it's harder to lose weight the closer you are to goal.
You'll need to find what works for you and keep with it for the long haul. We regularly see people back in the vets forum that have been offline and without support that need to lose a regain. It's all too easy to gain weight if you get sloppy.
~Cheri

I'm just under 11 months out, and I can eat anything I want. I have to be really careful. For me, that means weighing and measuring food, counting and tracking calories, and following the general rules for gastric sleeve patients. I don't think of it as dieting. I think of it as doing what I need to do for success. I usually have a Protein shake for Breakfast, greek yogurt and string cheese for lunch with a few grapes, nuts for an afternoon snack, and meat/vegetable for dinner. Some days I have a snack at bed time, depending on how many calories I've eaten and if I'm hungry. I could easily eat a lot more than I do. I try to keep it close to 900 calories, but lately I'm having a hard time staying below 1100. I, too, am surprised at how few calories and carbs it takes me to lose weight. No wonder i was so fat!