wantshealth

Hey Ladies - are we on tomorrow for lunch since it is raining or are we rescheduling to another day?

Reggie, Mo, Riley and All, Well I got back on the scale Tuesday and it wasn't pretty. Since my big unfill July 1st I have gained 35+ pounds. I decided to update the ticker and be honest. I am really disappointed in myself and want to get this back under control. It is very much a head problem with me - I eat for all the wrong reasons. I still believe in the band as a tool to help maintain. I am thinking of emailing Dr. Park and owning up to what has happened to see if she will consider doing another fill. I am so glad Nicole is organizing us for a walk/lunch in a few weeks. Not that I am happy to see other people struggling, but I feel better knowing I am not alone. cyber hugs to all of you.

Hi Jst, Reggie and Riley, Gosh I miss all my girls so much. Where is everyone??? Has anyone heard from Heather - is she doing OK? Jst, I think you need to just research each surgery and listen to what your doctor has to say about your health condition as well. I was banded about 1.5 years ago and I think I would still make the same choice. I totally agree with Riley - if you do what they tell you to do it will work. That being said, you can eat around the band (and I have heard you can do it with the other surgeries as well.) I think a critical part of this process is eventually getting to why you over ate in the first place and doing something to change that reaction / behavior. The band is a tool like Riley said and it can help you lose and maintain weight, but it isn't a magic pill. I was plateauing in the middle of my first year and in October 2010 my surgeon increased me to 7 cc's even though she did not think it was the right thing - she likes to aways back off .5 cc's from full; it was too much but I didn't know it right away. About 6 months after I started having lots of trouble with acid reflux, pain and vomiting. I thought the band had slipped. On 7/1 of this year, my surgeon (Dr. Park) unfilled me to where I was at the time of surgery to 4 cc's (my 2nd fill was to 6.5 cc's where I should have stayed) and ordered an upper GI. Thank goodness the band had not slipped, but my esphogus was showing weakness from having to work too much to push the food down/through the band. She want me to stay unfilled for at least 3 months and then we will see. I was at 171.2 but am now up to 179.6, so I am heading in the wrong direction. That being said, I am not doing what I should be. I am eating sweets and snacking and eating bigger portions. So it is a life long process and journey. On the positive side, I am doing lots more Yoga and feel great about that. And I made a big decision: I started graduate school last night. I am going for a Masters in Counseling so I can get a Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT) license. I've wanted to do this for soooo long - so it is really exciting and a little overwhelming. I would love to eventually help women who struggle with the emotional aspects of over eating. I totally believe that individual psychotheraphy should be part of the pre and post surgery after care. Anyway, I hope more of our girls start posting. And we need to plan a fall walk. If anyone wants to drive to Petaluma on a Saturday, I am happy to host the walk and lunch. Love and hugs to all my sistas of surgery (and brother John)! Pat

Kim, I am so glad to hear from you and that all went well. You sound like you are doing great!!! The water will come - after almost a year and a half I struggle some days too! I am so happy that you got to this goal after such a long journey. Hang in - it will get better. Hugs,

Upper Back pain can also be a sign of gallbladder problems. Gallbladders often flare up with rapid weight loss - even if you don't think 50 lbs in a year is not rapid - it is a lot of weight to drop. Mine flared up really badly after I had only lost about 30lbs. Usually gallbladder attacks happen after you have eaten something that has cholesterol - fat. The gallbladder stores the excess bile used by your liver to break down the fat and when the gallbladder develops stones they can cause pain and sometimes serious blockage to the liver. It can be diagnosed with an ultrasound and the removal is usually easy with laproscopic surgery.

Heather - So sorry to hear about the delay, but it will go by fast. You have been so persistent and have not given up after all this time, so 4 weeks more will be OK. We are all rooting for you - you deserve this more than anyone!! Hang In - don't binge and it will be here before you know it. Kim - My thoughts are with you. I know it is scary, but everything will be OK. You are changing your life for the better - your health will be so much improved. Hang in over the next month and things will get better. Maria - so good to here from you again. 68 lbs is nothing to be ashamed of - I am sure it has made you so much healthier. You are so right that it is work and a journey - but worth it. I am down 85 lbs after starting this journey 9/13/2009 - that is 1 year and almost 10 months ago - so yes it has taken me longer than I thought, but I am so grateful for the weight I've shedd (not lost since it ain't coming back if I can help it!!!) I feel so much better and move so much better and know I've added years to my life. Miss all my girls - remember - when I get the next 15 lbs off - we are having a big 100lb party at my house and all my sistas of surgery are invited (and John too!). Hugs to all of you.

Ok - couldn't figure out how to copy / attach picture in my post, so I created an album with 2 pictures from the walk. Anyone that is my friend can see.

Heather I have been thinking of you - I am so happy for you. You deserve an award for perserverance!!! I know you will be successful - just be patient - it sure is a journey!! Do you have the cd to listen to to prepare for surgery? They really helped me to calm down - I put them on my iPod and listened to them when I went to bed. All Sorry I didn't get the pics posted until now of our 5/14 walk. It was a small group but so good to reconnect with Analyn, Jess and her cousin, Kim, who I had never met. (Kim is having surgery the same day as Heather I think.!) I've been busy as Nate graduated from High School on 5/27 and we had a huge party on 5/29 - all of my sisters and brother came from out of state so it was really special. Family all left on Monday so I am trying to get back to business. I am applying to graduate school. Not sure how the money is going to work out given no job and Nate also going to college, but maybe the angels will smile down on me I am really excited about it - definately ready for a change. When you shedd a lot of weight and work on the emotional stuff that it represents, amazing things happen in your life! Hugs to everone!

I'll be there - can't wait to see everyone.

Hi Everyone Sorry I've been out of touch - life is crazy. The separation from my hubby has been hard - really hard to love someone but have serious issues with them. Pray for us. I had my first job interview since I was laid off 11/1. It went OK - I hope I make it to the second round. It was weird - not sure what they were looking for. It was a group interview with 3 guys - one never made any eye contact - so weird. It would be great if I got it since it is in Santa Rosa - most IT jobs are in the city, south or east bay which is a killer commute from Petaluma. Anyway, I got a new interview suit - a size 12 ! (And of course shape wear too! - shape wear and panty hose are cruel inventions but they work!) I haven't had panty hose on in years! I am also really seriously thinking of going back to school for a Masters in Counseling Psychology. I have wanted to do this for a long time and I'm not getting any younger. It is a big decision / big financial committment, but I know it is right for me. Say some prayers for me in this area too, as I am really struggling trying to figure out how to make this happen financially since son #2 is heading off to college also. I caught up on all the posts and agree with all that has been said. The band works when we follow the program, but it is hard to follow the program sometimes! I too have trouble with dense protein and dense veggies - really have to chew and wait, which I don't do well when I am really hungry. For my emotional eating, I tend to go for the carbs - comfort food. When I don't snack I do so much better - 3 meals works. Anyway, I am 1 lb away from shedding 80 lbs! I wouldn't trade my band for anything - even with the discomfort and PBing that happens. 80 lbs I could not have done on my own. And I am so much healthier for it. It was the right decision for me. My new goal is 100 lbs instead of 116. Since I am about 20 lbs from it I think it is doable. So listen up ladies (and John) - when I get to 100 we are having a party!! (A walk here in Petaluma and a healthy lunch - I am hoping it will be in late summer / September!) Anyway, it is a really positive fun goal to focus on. OK - Jess suggested 9:30 on Sat 5/14 I assume at the Vallejo Marina. I am in big time! Can't wait to give everyone a big hug! Love you all

It is so good to hear from everyone and what everyone is up to. Candra and Jess - I love you girls. Jess, I started walking again this past week after you wrote about your bridge walks - you were always an inspiration for me. Candra so sorry things are rough - I too believe in the meds if you can find a way to get them cheaper - I take Zoloft for anxiety and have for a while and don't want to mess with it - its not a perfect fix - like now with all the stress in my life, but I know I would be worse with out it. Tam - your car accident story sent chills up my spin! I am so so glad you and your daughter were OK. You must have a really good guardian angel! Maybe she can help with the eating too! Protein is good. I can't wait to give you a hug on 5/14. Tina - my nieces have done the juice shakes and they swear by them for how they feel (one of them has Celiac disease and it really helped her.) Monique - your pic is awesome - you go girl! Pam - good to hear you back too and that you are back at things. One of the things I've learned with my therapist is the right mix of protein and healthy fat is important for sustaining us - keeping the hunger away - Atkins can do that. I do think it goes too light on the veggies. But it could be a good kick starter again. CoCo - I am so glad you are nearby (sort of). And thinking of trying for a baby - OMG he/she is going to have so many mama / aunties! I agree get the weight off now - I always found it harder after each of my boys - that was when I really started to pack it on! It felt like a license to eat (you know - the baby needs some!!!). Riley - where are you!!!??? I have been busy and up and down. I just did a quick trip to LA with my son to look at the college he was accepted at - The American Musical and Dramatic Academy in Hollywood. It was a great trip and I am really excited for him. I just hope we can figure out how we will pay for it. I realy want to try to help do this for him, but I am also really torn about maybe going back to school myself, as I really don't want to go back to the high pressure job/work I had before. For all you ladies, I mentioned that I have been in therapy the last year with the Dr. who specialize in people with eating issues. As I read everyone's posts, I know that everyone is dealing with something. It is painful to dig into the issues of why we use food for other than nurishment, but I really believe that is the answer to this puzzle. Figuring it out and then figuring out a different way to deal with whatever emotion/ feeling, etc. is the key. Its very hard work. In the spirit of sharing, one of my insights has been the I use food to numb out and not feel or express my feeling and my needs. Not sure if this resonates with anyone else, but it has been powerful insight for me. I can actually start to feel me 'leave' my body when I do it. Anyway, I love you lots! Hope you have a good week. (I plan on having an awesome one - tomorrow is my birthday - I will be mumble mumble!! I had 2 gift certificates saved and I am having a massage and a facial tomorrow! I can't wait!) Hugs to you all!

Just remember it took us all years of bad eating habits and emotional eating to gain this weight. We all want it all off yesterday. But if it takes a few years so be it. We have all lost weight, so we need to focus on that and know we can do it. We all love each other and want each other to be successful. Love to all my banded (and sleeved) sistas and bro John

Oh this is so great to hear from everyone. I can do 5/14 (I filled in the poll). It would be so great to get the whole gang back together and to start posting again. Riley - what are you up to - I need a hug big time! Candra, Jess and Tamra - I have missed you so much! Remember - this is about how much we love each other and support each other - not about being ashamed. Canolie - yeah you are back - I can't wait to see you! Pam, Heather, April, Ash - tell me what's going on. Bella - I won't be at the Santa Rosa meeting in April cause I have to take my son to LA to look at the college he is going to go to (which we didn't visit when we went to LA in the summer - go figure!) OK ladies here's a summary of what's been going on with me: After about April / May I didn't really lose much more and didn't feel alot of restriction. I also wasn't staying on program since I could eat most things. I have to say though, at least I didn't gain - but plateauing for 5-6 months is no fun. I also went back into therapy with the Dr. who specialized in weight / eating issues. Been doing a lot of hard work. I finally went back to see Dr. Park in October and though she didn't think I should get another fill (thought I would be too tight) she gave me another .5 cc so I am at 7 cc. It really did make me tight. I wish I had gone back sooner before I was so discouraged. I lost another 7 lbs after that. And I have to be really careful with what I eat, how much and how much I chew. In other words, the band is working like it is suppose to work. And everything they say is true: I can only eat a little of dense protein/ dense veggies, but can eat tons of sliders (had 2 pieces of chocolate cake today!!!) I lost my job November 1st, which really, in the long run, is a good thing since I was so miserable there. I went into a bad depression in January and February, but continued to go to therapy and have finally had some break throughs this last month. At the end of February I separated from my husband and began to start losing weight again (5 lbs in the last month). We've been together 26 years and married for 20 years. We are going to try counseling and I am hopeful it will work. We both know it can't continue as it has - there have to be changes. My focus now is on putting me first. Taking care of myself and getting the rest of the weight off (although I am not sure I am still headed for 140 lbs. I think if I can lose an even 100 lbs and get to 156 it might be fine. Right now I am a size 12/ medium in good clothese / 14 in cheaper clothes and my goal was always to be a size 10. So I think if I lose another 26 lbs I will be there no problem. I am also trying to figure out what I am going to do for work. I'm not sure I want to go back to the same high stress work in IT, so I am giving myself the month of April without any pressure. (That being said I spent the whole day working on a job application for an IT Director job up here in So. County - so obviously the guilt sometimes wins out over doing what is best for me.) Anyway, please post updates and let me know what has been going on with everyone and how you are doing.

OMG - I thought we had lost everyone! I was amazed to see the emails from my old dear friends, Candra, Heather, Tamra, Reggie and Pam. I hope we can start posting again - I miss you all a bunch. I agree with Heather that a walk is in order once this rain stops. I just got back from Sunny Florida - it was amazing and I am freezing here! Lots to update everyone on. Hugs Pat

Monique, Congratulations! I am so happy for you. I hope to be following you now that I have finally broken my @!X&8 5 month plateau. I can't tell you how good it is psychologically to be out of the 190's! You are doing so great - it must feel so good to be so close to goal. I too am reevaluating my end goal. When people hear that I have 50 more pounds to lose they are shocked and don't think it is right. I am going to see what I feel like and look like when I get into the 150's. Hugs,