Queen ApisM

I have dilated cardiomyopathy. My cardiologist also was the one who really encouraged the surgery. So far, we haven't seen any crazy change in my ejection fractions, but we will see in June at my next echo. By then I would have been down more than 120 lbs for more than a year, so he is eager to see if there will have been any changes to my heart function. Having said that, I have had to reduce my BP meds quite a bit, so that's good. But, we are trying not to reduce them too much since they help with my DCM.

I'm sorry you are experiencing this. I have been lucky - so far. People have commented that I look great, that sort of thing, but no one has crossed a line. Having said that, I definitely have avoided people who would make those comments partly because they are toxic people and I know it ahead of time. In fact I was just at an industry gathering and actively avoided an old coworker because she is a gossip who would ask really obnoxious questions and then talk about me with others. Not going to entertain that crap. Thanksgiving will be interesting as I will see extended family and I am quite a lot thinner than the last times they saw me. I'll deal with them if and when it comes up. At least with truly toxic people you can try and avoid them, but then there are the ones who are wildcards and you can't do anything to evade that sort of thing.

It's really individual. I don't exactly recall what I was able to do at 3 months out, but I am pretty certain it was VERY little pasta or rice. I remember having to cook for my MIL after her surgery at around that time and I couldn't eat much of anything with pasta in it. Now I can have a bit more, but only a few bites if I am eating protein with it (which I am, most of the time). If not, I can eat 3/4-1 cup, but that's it. Which is good thing because that's a portion. Bread is more complex. At three months, the only bread I tried eating was a half slice of toast. Non-toasted bread was not happening. Now, I can eat bread, but how much is partly dependent on the qualities of the bread - how fluffy it is, how dense, what else I am eating with it. Also... anything with two slices of bread is usually a no go. I always stick to one slice of bread, or half a roll, or half of whatever. The only real exception to that rule is light English muffins. That portion size works well for me, but I am also 15 months out, so I wouldn't recommend trying that.

@SpartanMaker brings up a really good point. I assumed (and perhaps should not have) that the obsession choice of words was hyperbole. If not, then they are right, it could be an issue. I'd just be mindful about some of the items flagged in case any of them ring true for you.

Agree with others. As long as you are not overindulging (and it sounds like you have portion control under control) there is nothing wrong with this! Have fun trying out new things!!

Definitely bring it up to them, but I'd recommend givng them very specific information about what your shots entail - what hormones, in what amounts, etc. I mention this because sometimes doctors don't always know specifics about other specialties or specific medical needs. I know my practice had us stop birth control for a month before, I think, but that's a much different set of hormones than I imagine you are dealing with, with known implications for potential clotting risks. But, better to be very specific and insistent to make sure you are safe!! Good luck. 🙂

There isn't one diet. My program is very much about balanced eating, from early on. They have never said no carb or even low carb at any point in this process. Of course, they prefer better quality carbs, but they don't villainize a slice of bread. In fact, I just saw my nutritionist and described my normal breakfast, which involves a light English muffin. She loved it (because English muffins haven't expanded in size over the years like bagels and other items have) , and was baffled when I told her my PCP was aghast I was having an English muffin at breakfast. Honestly if I didn't have carbs (and that darn English muffin) it would be really hard to hit my calorie goals, which are also not as low as others might stick to (we just upped me to 1750, because I've been at 1500 and am working out at a lot at fairly high intensity but losing very slowly). I think we sometimes need to experiment, within reason, to determine what works best for us - physically and mentally. I know going carb free would not work long term for me, so I'm working on building better carb habits. Other people love going low or no carb, and their bodies respond. I think we need to be smart about how we go about things but also realize there are a lot of paths to success. It's about what works for our bodies and minds.

I plan to do what I did last year: try (taste) everything I'm excited about, and then based on how good it tastes, decide which ones get some of my precious tummy space. Last Thanksgiving I had just transitioned to solid foods and this was also my approach. It worked great. Obviously if you are not on solids yet that changes the equation quite a bit. No meal is worth potentially affecting the healing process. Honestly the only things I care about at Thanksgiving are stuffing and pumpkin pie. So, planning for some of each. And already scheming about how to keep active while visiting not so active family members.

This is hard. I also realize now how much I was eating and am sort of disgusted by it, but I really try NOT to project that on other people. First off, I don't know where I will be in another year or two or four. I hope I will continue to use my tool properly, but I may not, and then I am just being judgmental and a hypocrite. Second, to the point @ms.sss made, I didn't like when people commented on my food intake before surgery, so why should I do that to others unless they ask for advice? All those comments do is make people defensive or sad or angry, and often leads to people doubling down on what they are doing, perhaps getting depressed and eating even worse, and often being afraid (when they are ready) to ask for help. Lastly, it's not like I have been the paragon of weight virtue for 40+ years of my life, so I am not exactly well positioned to tell other people what to do just because I've had some success now. I try to be very honest about my surgery (personally I think it is important to combat the stigma around surgery and obesity) and what it has helped me with, but I try to make it about me, and what changes it made for me, without commenting or directly connecting to their actions. There are ways to support people positively without saying things outright: making lower calorie/healthier options for family gatherings, engaging them in fun active activities, etc. A bit of leading by example, without saying something directly. I know this is hard - my Greek extended family is obsessed with food! I try to steer them toward not needing to have so much for the holidays (2 desserts instead of 5, for example) or making one of the options something healthier, but you have to be careful to not make people completely tune you out. It's counterproductive.

I had this happen at about 100 lbs lost. Went to a meeting and someone I hadn't seen in more than year (from a previous employer) was amazed and clearly wanted to ask a lot of questions. It was very reaffirming because sometimes it is hard to see the changes on a day to day basis. Most people don't mention my weight directly, but a lot of comments about how I look amazing or look really different. If I ever get close to my goal (in another 100 lbs) I'm sure the reactions will be even more pronounced.

Wow, the difference is already staggering! Once swelling is gone it's going to be absolutely amazing!!

This. I fit this pattern to a T. I am 14 months out. I'm working out hard, tracking calories, and have dropped into the 4-5 bs a month range. The fast loss is only at the very beginning for most people, and will slow down. You will have stalls and it will be frustrating unless you are someone very lucky. This is a long game, not a quick fix by any means.

Agree with everything @kcuster83 said above. I love Crystal Light, but had to stay away the first few days after surgery. It was just too harsh immediately after surgery, but a week or two in it was totally fine. You may need to experiment. I wound up drinking a lot of warm bone broth, which was great because it has more protein than regular broth, felt nice in my tummy, and also counted for fluid. I also used to love all the Premier Protein shakes, and post op I hated everything except the Vanilla which was tolerable. The Caffe Latte is also delicious but I couldn't drink it for the first 6 months because of the caffeine. I switched to Unjury protein powders in soy milk. Yum.

Torrid came up twice in this thread, so I will check them out. Thanks!

I wanted to add, I wound up asking for an electric blanket last year for Christmas. I got two, and it's the best. I keep one in my room, and one in the basement. I don't need them all the time, but when I am REALLY cold and nothing else is helping, the electric blanket is awesome.