nothopelessyet

I know I say this all the time (as do several other members on this forum), but here I go again: Everyone has to remember we are all so very different and have different circumstances that will affect our individual weight loss.
Comparing total pounds lost is deceiving as a myriad if different factors affect this. People who are heavier in the onset will generally lose more total pounds.
If you MUST compare (and we all know that we shouldn’t!) compare percentages and/or BMI changes. A 300lb person losing 25lbs in the first month is mathematically the same as a 200lbs person losing 16lbs. Same goes with a 6 foot tall person vs. someone who is 5’3”. Add in gender, medical history and amount of weight loss before surgery, etc., and the formula gets even more complicated.
In the long run, (i.e., average the percentage changes over a course or say, a year), one will often find (if one more or less sticks to plan) that most people will end up with the same numbers, in terms of percentage weight lost. Of course, there will be outliers.
It’s hard, but try to remember that this is about you, and you alone. The determination of your success is not dependent on the numbers of others.
I know, easier said, right? Just do the best to u can. ❤️

Dear New and Improved,
When you have been a 5’ 2 “ female - who is 64 years old - I and other will take your opinion more seriously. Have you ever had a hysterectomy ? Had to make the choices between adding Synthetic hormones that might help balance Weight gain and loss against a high risk of breast cancer ? Have you given birth to a child ? Or two ? Or had degenerative disease ? Or just been over 50 ? I hope that you remain healthy and never have to deal with medical issues. But growing older is not for the faint of heart. Another good thing about being long lived is the ability to know when to be insulted and when to just be amused. I remain the later

Starting weight and your height and BMI are all a part of figuring out where you will end up. I started at 5'3"; 54 years old and 320 pounds. After a year, I could never get under 170. But I was really happy with that. I put back about 8 to 10 pounds that second year..... and then....
Experienced a tough few years these past 7 or 8 years and gained back to 220 pounds. (STILL 100 pounds lighter !)
Took the last year and attacked it - slowly, and carefully - now I am 64 years old, 5'2" and 181 pounds.
I reset my goal as 175. I would be pleased to be between 175 and 180. Age adjusted BMI will be overweight, but both my doctors and I will be pleased with that. And yes, I am saggy and baggy. But I do not think elective surgeries are in my future. Need new knees.
Frankly, I am thrilled with myself this year. I will have lost my regain. I will be back to having lost basically 140 pounds.
Think about all you have accomplished !!!

that's about where I was when I was seven weeks postop, too, but I ended up losing over 200 lbs (100% of my excess weight) (I remember losing 16 lbs the first month and thought I was a hopeless case....but...no!)
your rate of weight loss is influenced by many factors, many of which you have no or limited control over at this point (or ever...) (age, gender, metabolic rate, genetics, starting BMI, whether or not you lost weight prior to surgery). What you DO have a lot of control over is activity level and commitment to your clinic's food plan. So as long as you are really committed, the weight WILL come off, whether fast or slow. I was a very slow loser from the get-go, but I stuck to my plan pretty much 100% that first year (and I still do to a large extent, but I've become a little looser since getting into maintenance). I firmly believe that it's your level of commitment rather than your rate of weight loss that determines your ultimate success. So don't worry about how fast or slow you're going. If your weight is trending downward, you're good. And just know that it's commitment that makes the difference - NOT how fast/slow you're losing. I was behind the curve my entire journey - but I made it all the way down to a normal BMI.

Yeah obviously higher starting weight will be different..
I guess I'm one of a kind I started at 322 and got to 165 within the first 9 months

304 to 128! 👌👌

This is transference. He's afraid YOU will no longer be attracted to him when you get thinner and more conventionally attractive. Pat him on the head and tell him to STFU.

What I do know is what you have posted, which is blatantly racist
Are your welfare check won't cover your weave and nail....

Avoidance of subject matter

A shame you can’t adapt your garbage takes and personality

Whatever the issue the surgery is meant to help you get over your issues and work out your unhealthy habits and relationships to food.. if you continue to fall back into bad habits every time life gets a little hard you're going to struggle...

Due to COVID 19 I am as courteous and supportive to others as I can possibly muster because this time is hard as f**k. I don't know what you are going through, and I don't want to get into a contest about who has it worse, because there is always someone out there that has it worse than me - everybody loses in those contests 😞
So whether you are gaining or losing please accept this virtual hug - you are more than your weight, you matter, and you are loved.

Are is it to just nod and agree?
No, which is exactly why I commented
What does the fact that i'm a two-time WLS patient have to do with my question
As I wrote in my first post, most WLS patients have a long history of being asked questions similar to the ones in your original post. "Why don't you just eat better? Why don't you just exercise more?" I would think as a two time WLS patient you would know that those comments are condescending and offensive.
Weight gain and reasons are a legitimate question
They are. But you didn't pose this as a legitimate question. You posted it in the Rants and Raves section and you said "Trust that i know i will get flack for this...."
I am left to draw one of two conclusions:
You are completely unaware of the thousands of articles that have been written about pandemic related lifestyle changes and its effects. You are also oblivious to the common sense impact of gyms/parks/trails closures, poverty's effect on one's diet, mental health consequences of social isolation etc..
The option I find easier to believe is this was not a sincere question. Instead it's an opportunity for you to congratulate yourself for having more fortitude than all these weak willed people who when faced with a life altering pandemic and economic shut down and didn't plant a garden, meal plan or pick up milk jugs filled with sand.

So after a month of waiting I had my first consultation with the surgeon. He seemed great, listened to me, let me know ESG isn't covered by my insurance so we're going with surgical VSG. He said that I probably only have to do one appointment with the dietician and then the psych eval, cardio/upper GI exam and weight class/exam. After we got off of our call I felt like I was going to have a panic attack. It just felt real finally and I had those intense moments of food grief and then imagined a nightmare scenario where my fiance leaves me because I can't drink and eat him under the table anymore. But then he was very supportive tonight after watching some more videos about VSG with me, and I found a YouTuber I really connected with who is three years post op and I felt a lot better. And now I'm just overjoyed that it looks like it might truly happen for me. I've lost 80 pounds once on my own, and 40 pounds too. The struggle is so exhausting and then you just put the weight all back on again as soon as you put your guard down for what feels like a couple months. I can't wait to have another tool in my weight loss toolbox.

So after a month of waiting I had my first consultation with the surgeon. He seemed great, listened to me, let me know ESG isn't covered by my insurance so we're going with surgical VSG. He said that I probably only have to do one appointment with the dietician and then the psych eval, cardio/upper GI exam and weight class/exam. After we got off of our call I felt like I was going to have a panic attack. It just felt real finally and I had those intense moments of food grief and then imagined a nightmare scenario where my fiance leaves me because I can't drink and eat him under the table anymore. But then he was very supportive tonight after watching some more videos about VSG with me, and I found a YouTuber I really connected with who is three years post op and I felt a lot better. And now I'm just overjoyed that it looks like it might truly happen for me. I've lost 80 pounds once on my own, and 40 pounds too. The struggle is so exhausting and then you just put the weight all back on again as soon as you put your guard down for what feels like a couple months. I can't wait to have another tool in my weight loss toolbox.

So after a month of waiting I had my first consultation with the surgeon. He seemed great, listened to me, let me know ESG isn't covered by my insurance so we're going with surgical VSG. He said that I probably only have to do one appointment with the dietician and then the psych eval, cardio/upper GI exam and weight class/exam. After we got off of our call I felt like I was going to have a panic attack. It just felt real finally and I had those intense moments of food grief and then imagined a nightmare scenario where my fiance leaves me because I can't drink and eat him under the table anymore. But then he was very supportive tonight after watching some more videos about VSG with me, and I found a YouTuber I really connected with who is three years post op and I felt a lot better. And now I'm just overjoyed that it looks like it might truly happen for me. I've lost 80 pounds once on my own, and 40 pounds too. The struggle is so exhausting and then you just put the weight all back on again as soon as you put your guard down for what feels like a couple months. I can't wait to have another tool in my weight loss toolbox.