Strivingforbetter

This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

Dude, if you look for persecution everywhere, you'll find it everywhere. If you don't like BariatricPal, don't use it!

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I am new to this forum, but am keeping my surgery a secret. I had my procedure done on 12/19. I made it through a Christmas Eve dinner without telling my in-laws (who I dislike), just attributing not eating to a stomach bug.
It can be done! I think you will know if keeping it a secret is right for you!

The only one that knows is my husband. I did not tell anyone else. I needed to deal with my own emotions and not with everyone's emotions. Their opinions, what they think, etc......

My kids and my husband and one friend know. My son told his fiancee. That's it. Too many judgmental people in my life. Everyone has been trying to talk me into doing Keto, not knowing I've done the surgery. It bothers me that people are trying to push me into it. Plus I'm so emotional post op. I've lost nearly 30 lbs in a month and a half and I feel like them pushing me means I haven't lost fast enough for them. So if I tell them I've had the surgery what will they think? That I can't do anything right? No thank you. I'll keep it to myself.

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This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

I'm doing well thank you. Had a 4 day stay and still quite sore but happy to be home in my own space. Hubbies anxiety quickly faded after seeing me in recovery. Went straight to caretaker mode. I'm also grateful to my mother for being there the whole time with him/us then and now for emotional support. I can't wait to see my work in progress!!


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Dr. Rodrick McKinlay in Salt Lake City, Utah is also an expert DS surgeon. He did my DS in 2017, and I would highly recommend him. He has also trained other surgeons in the procedure.

This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

This has been widely discussed on this site, and you'll find that people have strong opinions for either keeping it a secret or telling all. I personally have kept my surgery private. Only my husband and children know. I don't feel obligated to tell anyone my personal medical history. I wouldn't expect someone to tell me they had a vasectomy. It's none of my business. I've changed my eating habits, so I tell them what my diet consists of but leave it at that. Too many people want to criticize another person for his/her life decisions, and I don't have time for that. I'm focusing on being positive and healthy and don't need the drama, especially at work.

What’s the big deal with steak?! I can and do eat steak, pork, brats, chicken, sausage, etc. I have since purée phase.

I kind of agree with the gentleman at your meeting. Now, I will say, I don't know how he's able to tolerate all that meat so early, but I agree with him about depriving himself. I also allow myself to have certain things that other people who have had this surgery wouldn't dare have. I eat chocolate daily. It's something that I really enjoy. Now, I don't overindulge in it, but I do have a bit every day, and I make sure to track it.
I've dieted for a large portion of my life, and what's always happened before is that I'm really strict, then I'll allow myself to have a little something on special occasions, then I get completely derailed and can't get back on track. Well, this time is different. I don't count anything as getting off track really. This is a lifestyle change; it's not a diet. I choose to primarily eat healthy, but every now and then, I eat things that aren't necessarily good for me. This is how I plan to keep this going for the long term.

Your surgery worked. It takes time. Have you had the big bowel movement yet ? Within three months nothing will fit. Get ready for it And hang in there.

One of my favorite anecdotes is when a a good looking colleague of mine says in a great southern drawl .... "Girl, you look amazing, you must have lost 30 lbs!" I said, "Yeah, something like that" It was actually 75 lbs at that point
Most people have no idea how much others really weigh!

I started out weighing almost exactly where you started, and we seem to have lost the same amount. i'm also 5'4". I've had a few people ask me how much I've lost total, but I never tell them because I don't want them getting suspicious about how I lost it. Most people don't lose 80 pounds on their own. I've never had anyone tell me to stop losing, and I've maintained for the past 6 months. I think my inherited thicker legs must be the reason no one tells me to stop losing. They're a family heirloom (not one I cherish). I wear a size 8 pants and a medium top. Since losing the weight, my skin has tightened up considerably on my arms, butt, and under my chin. I feel I look normal and healthy now, not too skinny, so maybe that's why no one is alarmed I've lost 80 pounds. I don't look underweight, just normal. However, I do plan on losing another 10-15 before my Tummy Tuck this summer.

Hi! I am 15 years out from DS. I will tell you what I was told not only by my surgeon but more or less everyone in my support group. I say from my support group because when I had surgery there was no DS Surgeon in our state and everyone left the state to have surgery, hence I don't think any of us had the same surgeon other than a married couple. EMBRACE THE FAT!!!! Number one rule! If you don't see fat in your toilet your not eating enough. My skin gets extremely dry any time I cut the fat. I am shocked that you were told or assumed that low fat was great for you. Protein should be about 100 grams a day split up in 20-25 gram servings, so any fatty meat is good!!! Avoid sugar. Sugar isn't as bad for DS'ers as it is for RNY, we don't dump. However, we absorb 100% of the sugar we take in. I am also surprised you can eat bread at all. Most DS'er will have bloating and serious gas issues from bread. For me (and from most I have heard from) the gas hits at the night so you may not be aware of it. For me it has been so bad the stink wakes me up at nigh, thank goodness I can blame the dog Try going flour free for a month then reintroduce it to your body, if you have a reaction please stop.
To make your diet easy for you, the order you should be eating your food, fatty meats, non starchy veggies with butter or olive oil, if your still hungry go back to fatty meat you didn't eat enough!!! Go easy on the starchy veggies. IF you need bread and Desserts, no more than a bite or two. But as my surgeon says, if you still hungry by the time you get to bread and dessert your out eating your surgery! As for malabsorption, you absorb about 20-25% of fat, 50ish% of protein and 100% of sugar (carbs are sugar, stay way from carbs that are not veggies)
You need to go back to experimenting with your body, bread...flour based food give me gas, bloat and in the end a lot of time in the bathroom. I also feel like I have the flu. My husband will look at the cookie in my hand and will ask me if I have plans for tomorrow and is it worth being sick on the couch for. Most of the time it isn't! I also have issues with rice, it will clog me up. I have heard of other DS'ers with that issue with rice too, but many more with flour. Sugar will cause the scale to go up. I still eat sugar, but it is a rare treat, not a daily ,weekly or even monthly treat. Mostly a yearly treat at this time of year. But I still very easy on it because to much will cause bloating and gas too. That is normal for humans who don't eat sugar, not just DS'ers. On the sugar note, if your craving sugar your going thru withdrawal or some Protein Drinks will cause cravings or you need to up your Vitamin Bs special B12.< /span>

Ok, what to eat on the go. I drive for a living so I have this down. My favorite is meat and cheese roll ups. What ever meat and cheese is on sale at the deli. In the roll up I will put a slice of red pepper or a some cream cheese or a smear of spinach dip (fat is your friend!!!) Jerky and beef sticks are great! Nuts. costco has parmesan cheese chips, LOVE THEM! tuna salad eaten with a fork with a cheese chip on top. I get the fatty tuna and a bit of crunch from the cheese chip. Love it! Salad with LOTS of meat. I can do chicken strips, bunless burgers, salad at any fast food place. Be careful of yogurt, most are low fat and high sugar. Actually in general avoid any food that is low fat, the sugar is crazy high. If you want yogurt, plain and add your own fruit or sugar free jam to it. You can eat fruit, pick higher Fiber ones just be aware of the amount of sugar your eating. I do apples slices and berries mostly, easy to pack for the road. These are treats, not staples.
Depression, I never had depression issues before surgery and was not prepared for it after. It hit me about a year out. I take lexapro now, it does not cause weight gain. I have noticed that when I eat more fatty fish, salmon or can tuna in fat (hard to find anymore) I feel better. I upped my omegas when I caught that, so now I am taking those with my Vitamins. I would suggest talking to your primary about depression and then getting a therapist or councilor to talk to. Not only for everything going on in your life, you have a lot! but also for food addiction. Surgery will not fix food addiction and if you don't get a handle on it, you will eventually out eat your surgery.

The stats on the long-term weight loss helped me make my decision, too. I go in for my blood work tomorrow for my first year check-up, and I'm looking forward to seeing how well my Vitamin routine has worked for me. I also take only take two multi-vitamins a day, two vitamin B12s and two calcium chews a day.

I am on my pre-op diet and I have done some cheating. However, mines seem mild in comparison. Over the past 8 days, I have eaten some grapes (about 10), a serving of snack Factory Pretzel Crisps (I checked the label and gave myself exactly 1 serving) I put half a banana in my Protein smoothie. I wasn't sure if this is actually cheating or not because bananas weren't on my list of excluded or included fruits I can use for shakes and smoothies. I ate Taco Bell plain Refried Beans when I was out holiday shopping. Ate about 3 sporks of that. My big fail was Sunday. I made a salad for my husband's dinner. Just a plain old iceberg lettuce salad mix with tomatoes, cucumbers, a small amount of bacon bits, cheese, 1/4 a piece of baked crispy chicken, and (yes I counted) croutons with light vinaigrette dressing. Before I know I was huddled in the corner like Smeagal devouring about a cup of the salad! LOL my husband caught me and tried to take it away, but I would not let go of MY PRECIOUS! LOL

I told six people, that’s it and I asked them to keep it private. I have family members that don’t know and I’m almost two months since surgery. One of the six has already been trying to tell me how unhealthy eating 500 calories is blah blah blah.

When people ask how I’ve been losing the weight, I tell them I’m following a doctor supervised plan which includes calorie restriction. That’s not a lie, and it’s the truth.

I had some turkey, a bit of dressing, some green Beans. Later I had a small piece of pie. What’s wrong with that?
We are still human, meant to enjoy gatherings and special occasions with our family and friends.
Do not feel guilty, get back on the regular program tomorrow. I don’t feel like enjoying a holiday meal is screwing up, I think it’s normal.