serenity55

You all are crackin' me up! Irene, just because you're no longer a bandster doesn't mean you shouldn't come by and visit! Especially after all the great things you said about the band! Jenn, we'll be waiting on Saturday to see what the doctor says. I don't get up at the butt-crack of dawn, but it's pretty damn close Ya know, they used to give me a little more when I played for the annual meetings, and it was just this time they gave me the gift card, and nothing more. We're not getting raises this year, either, so I guess it's the economy. That's OK, I'll take the $100! Everybody have a good night Debbie!!

Irene, I wish you nothing but more success. You reached out to me before I was banded, and I'll never forget that. I'm so jealous of all y'all getting together in Texas. Someone send me a tape--or CD! (hahaha!) Sounds like you're gonna have heaps of fun! The lunch went well today. Everyone is always appreciative, stopping me to tell me how much they enjoy the music. There are lots of chairs set up in this room--chairs and tables--so imagine, if you will, this blind woman walking through without killing herself! (There were at least 200 people there.). I stayed pretty close to the wals, and only got a couple of plants in my hair! LOL! And they gave me a $100 Visa gift certificate to spend where ever I want to! Pretty freakin' awesome! (I went in before the crowd got there, otherwise I'd never have attempted it, not with people's chairs pulled out, and them standing around the way sighted folks do!) :smile2:! Everybody be good! (hahahahahahahahahaha!!!) Debbie

Kat, I just read your last post. I really hope it won't dampen your spirits too much, because you're going to see the boys. As for Rick's niece, I'm with you. She won't ever get her act together if they try to bail her out. Alcoholics and drug addicts are cunning, and they'll continue down the path of destruction until they decide they've had enough. It just causes more heartache for their loved ones. My father was an alcoholic, as are a couple of my sisters, and one of them was doing drugs for awhile. I don't know if she still is, I haven't spoken to her, but that's a story for another time. I'll send positive thoughts that you're able to enjoy your trip in spite of everything.

Hi all, Shar I know what you mean about the getting back in to the right mindset. I feel like I've lost mine, mind that is, sometimes. But I got on the scale this morning, and had only gained one pound, which is amazing when I think of the junk I've been eating, meaning sweets. Michelle, you are a courageous, strong woman. You're still working, doesn't matter if it's just a few hours. I know you may be thinking you have no choice, but that doesn't make you any less courageous. Angela, I'm truly sorry to hear about your uncle. I will definitely keep him, and you, and the entire family in my thoughts. Kat, glad you're going to see your grandsons! Bet they'll be just as excited to see their grammy! Tracy, I live in southern California, in Van Nuys, which is a suburb northwest of L.A Suzie, you go ahead on, with your bad self! You'll be my inspiration to keep moving in spite of everything. Jenn, I hope you feel better, but it doesn't sound like you're going to be able to get much rest. Please be as gentle as you can with yourself, OK? Hope I haven't missed anyone. (Hey, Plain!) Tomorrow the place I work is having their annual meeting, which means lots of donors and the board of directors and a fancy lunch, for which I'll get to play. They pay me too, which is nice. I've been treated like sort of a celebrity there, and it gets me away from the board for a couple of hours. When I recorded a CD of original music, the organization bought 150, and people still talk about it. . It's kinda nice. Everyone have a good evening. Kat, what did you make for dinner? You asked for suggestions. (I went on the computer at work, but couldn't answer because my lunch hour was almost up.) Debbie

Jenn, glad you're OK!

Oh, Michelle, I'm so sorry! My younger sister has Lupus, and although I've read some things about it, I still feel that I don't understand much. I'm sending you gentle hugs, and will keep you in my thoughts as well as sending support, like everyone else. When you can't be strong, let us hold you up. Kat, just reading your post pisses me off and it's not even happening to me. It really bugs me when good, hardworking people are taken advantage of, because that's what it seems like to me. Sorry your headache is coming back. Take care of yourself, girl; you just got better. . Suzie, you're home and busy! Sounds like you'll need another vacation before long! :-) Jenn, Cindy, Angela and Shar, be good! LOL Oh, and you too, Plain, especially! :-) Debbie

Hey everybody, It feels so good to say that I don't eat the way I should and know that y'all understand. My meals have been healthy, it's the stuff in between that's crap. (How many calories in M&'M's?) I went to a memorial service today for a former coworker and friend. She drove me to work for 7 years, and went above and beyond what a human resources director should have. There were sandwiches, broccoli, potato and pasta salads, and chocolate cake, carrot cake, which I don't like, red velvet cake, and a white cake, all home made. I had the chocolate. It was fan freakin' tastic! I loved reading about the last part of your trip, Suzie. Like just about everybody else, I wish I could have been with you all, it does sound like fun. And the comments about the pics? Hmmm!! I don't want to be too much of a downer, but I was feeling just a little anxious, I guess before the memorial, and now that it's over, I'm better. I still have to deal with my feelings around my brother's cancer. And I need to get my butt in gear and find somewhere to play. I need money! I can pay my bills, but I don't have much after that, and that sucks. But all of you are awesome; I can't tell you how much it means to me to feel a part of this fantastic group of women--and man! Becoming a part of this thread was the best thing I could have done for myself. Michelle, your doctor's appointment is tomorrow, isn't it? Let us know how things go. And I'm truly sorry that your sister has had to deal with the things she's gone through. I will keep her, and you, in my thoughts. Jenn, Kat, Tracy, Cindy, Shar, take care of yourselves! Angela, I'm sorry to hear about your house. That's got to be overwhelming. Plain, how ya doin'?! Debbie

Evening all, Just dropping by to say hey. Nothing going on, unless you count the one person that really ticked me off on the switchboard today. Oh yes, and I ate a couple handfuls of M&M peanuts. And I wonder why I can't lose! *sigh* But I did go for my walk today, one mile. Glad y'all had a good time last night, Kat, Suzanne and Terri. Plain, thanks for the description. You were one of the peeps who answered my thread a million years ago. Michelle, I hope you're doing all right. Jenn, I've been to New York, and hope to get back soon. Don't know when, though. Actually, I'd love to travel the way Suzanne and Darrell are doing. Thanks Tracy for the description. Let us know how you're doing, OK? Hi Angela, Shar, and anyone else I've missed.

Suzie, I just started writing when you were at Disneyland. I'm sorry, too; it would have been a great excuse for me to meet you there, somehow, because I haven't been there in years, and the good news is that I'd probably fit much more comfortably on all the rides. I love your description of yourself, and I'm looking forward to getting to know you, and everyone. Michelle, I'm so sorry you're in pain. I'm glad you checked in, and glad too that you went on FB; it means you're not disappearing, which is good. You're probably the closest to me, and I don't think you'd want me to come up and check on you in person! Hahahaha!! Cindy, does it hurt to talk? You poor thing! I really hope you start feeling better soon. Your students are pretty lucky to have you as a teacher. And crazy is good! :-) Angela, your personality comes across in your posts. You seem like you'd be a great person to know. Thank you for your description, too. Hi Shar. Hi Plain, whenever you drop by! Kat, Suzie and Terry--hope I'm not misspelling that--have a great time. Well, you're probably winding it up, but if not, party on, y'all! Jenn, congratulations! You go girl! Thank you all for accepting me. You really are a terrific group! Debbie

Howdy! Thanks Jenn and Kat for the descriptions. Kat, you're right; you ladies are gorgeous! And Jenn's right, you're good! OK, I guess it's my turn. I'm African-American, though I refer to myself as black, or as a friend of mine in England said, "Maybe you're just a citizen of the world." My hairdresser says my hair is a sable brown, almost black. I have a perm, which for me means straightening it. I wish it would grow, but it doesn't seem to want to cooperate. It's about shoulder length. My eyes are dark brown, but because I have cataracts they have a filmy appearance. The friend of a friend said, "She has really unusual eyes," to which my friend responded, "She's blind, fool!" I thought that was funny. I used to wear dark glasses all the time until someone said, "Take them off, I want to see your face." My family used to make me feel that I had to wear glasses; my friends taught me that it didn't matter to them. I'm five five, and am solid, but I feel my fat around my stomach. I think I could live with anything if I could just get rid of that. Although I have a perm, I curl my hair for work, or sometimes just wear it in a scrunchy--I have different colors to match my clothes. I do wear dresses sometimes to work, but lately I've been wearing pants more and more because the switchboard is not out where the public can see me. I've been told I have a beautiful smile, and a flawless complexion, probably the only two things I can really be proud of. Since I've lost weight, my hands are smaller, and my fingers really are long and slender, perfect for playing the piano. Debbie

Who was it that said you were all gorgeous? I can't remember, So I'm offering a challenge. I posted this as a thread somewhere, but I think it would be fun if y'all want to describe what you look like. I keep threatening to have someone post pics of me, but I'm not really where I want to be, as you know, since you've all read my last novela--uh, post--and that's kept me from really trying too hard. Anyway, Michelle, I think you kinda know what I look like. But if anyone wants to describe what they look like, I'd love it, and I'll try to do the same, or maybe just get my butt in gear and have someone post pics. Night! Debbie.

Evening everyone, I have to weigh in--pun intended--on not losing weight. I was so jazzed when I got my band, so determined to be the best bandster I could be, and the scale isn't moving. I know why. It's not that I'm eating as many sweets as I used to, but I'm not making the right choices, burritos, pasta, crap like that. Jenn, you said in one of your earlier posts that you suck. Not true. The guy who gets you is gonna be one lucky dude. I used to wonder what was wrong with me, why no guy was ever attracted to me. I've had a couple of boyfriends, but nothing that lasted, and I figured it was because I was blind, but so was one of the guys I dated, so there goes that theory. By the way, I'm glad you guys laughed, Jenn and Kat. I think it's important for us to laugh at ourselves, and each other, too. Anyway, I have a long way to go in this weight thing, and with my brother's illness it's just one more reason for me to not feel motivated. But my friend Ariane will go walking with me at work--there's a track there and we walk at least a mile before work. I also have a resistance program a personal trainer friend set up for us. Have I done that? Hell no! *sigh* Debbie

Hi y'all, Thank you, ladies, for the sympathy. I find myself being sad, scared and angry in turn. Sad because I don't want to lose my brother, even though I know pancriatic cancer is one of the more deadly, or so I've heard. Angry, because my family is just riddled with the stuff, and scared when I think of my own mortality, and wonder who's going to be next? I try not to stay in that place, but sometimes it just gets me. On a lighter note, I learned that the director of the show I did last year--Little Shop of Horrors--received awards for best director and best actress, for our leading lady. I've been nominated for best musical director before, when I worked with this same director, and I'm so glad for her I don't even care that I wasn't this time. I went to get my hair done this morning, and am just hanging out for the rest of the day. Tomorrow I'll go play for a few hours at the hospital where I got my band. It's very rewarding. Feel better everyone. Kat, I hope you got to just rest. Michelle, I know how you feel about the weight thing. I haven't weighed myself, though people tell me it looks like I've lost even more since I've been to Hawaii. Looks can be deceiving, can't they? (Said the blind woman.) Hahaha!

Hi y'all! Jenn, EMT? I used to say that if I were sighted I'd be something in the medical field, until I read a book called White Coat, White Cane, about an MD. I'd want to be something like a brain surgeon. Hahahaha! Can't wait to hear your medical adventures! All the hard work will be worth it. Kat, good news! Cancer is a scary thing, and runs through my family. My brother was just diagnosed with pancriatic cancer, and I've already lost my mother and two sisters to it. Michelle, thank you for reminding us of the date for your doctor's appointment. I thought that's what I remembered. Think I'll weigh myself tomorrow. Then I'll have to come and tell you all the truth. I don't think I could do a ticker, so I'll just change the numbers--hopefully they'll go down, not up! Debbie

Michelle, I've been thinking about you, too. I'm going to tell these ladies (and our one gent) just how supportive you've been to me. when I first started trying to get banded, I had a big disappointment, was given the wrong information about a seminar, and so I missed it completely, and had to take a bus home. Anyway, Michelle was one of the first people who wrote to say how sorry she was, and made me feel better, and like I should keep trying. I read here that you're going to see the doctor later this month, Michelle, so I'll be here to see what happens. I have a sister that has lupus. Kat, was it you who suggested my computer read with a Texas drawl? I wish it would! That'd be pretty cool! It does have other accents though, British, Spanish, French, German. I think that's all. Have a good night, everyone. Debbie

Cindy, is it too late for me to ask you to send me your share of the banana pudding? I looooove that stuff! I'm a transplanted southern girl, born in Biloxi Mississippi, but I've been in California most of my life. The foods we ate followed us out here, though, and my grandmother and older sisters made stuff like that from scratch. And what about these peanut butter chocolate pumpkins, ladies? They sound wonderful! Maybe I'll have to go to Wal-Mart! Told ya i love sweets. But here's something. I haven't had a fill since before I went to Maui, and I have restriction, don't know if I'm at my sweet spot. I had a chicken salad for lunch. We bought a chicken at Costco, and my best friend and roomy Ariane put lettuce, tomato, cucumbers and little bits of carots in it. Usually I'm hungry after about three hours, but not today. (I have to confess though, that I had some Mother's oatmeal cookies--three, to be exact. But I wasn't starving the way I normally do. Go figure. Debbie

Hi Angela, wow! what a wedding! I must have met that same minister once. LOL! I played for a wedding and he was asked to let me know when to start playing the wedding march. I think he was so nervous because I'm blind that he just said, "Uh, ok, you can start now." Everybody heard him--it was a small church, and the rest of the wedding was not much better. We didn't have a ringing cell phone, though. Poor groom, he must have been really nervous to have forgotten to turn it off. Thank goodness for the best man! Tracy, you asked how long I was on Maui. One week. I wish I'd stayed longer, but I'm definitely going back. Debbie

Tracy, how old is Macy? I started taking piano lessons when I was five. But I can understand your frustration. When I was a teenager I got a scholarship to a conservatory which was a joke. I hated the teacher, and I'm sure the feeling was mutual. I fought with my dad every week about going, and I would have given up then if I'd been given a choice. Yes, my computer has speech. It's called JAWS (Job Access with Speech.) I also have a braille display which I can read. If someone quotes something, JAWS will tell me. Don't be afraid to ask anything. You can't offend me. I ask questions from sighted people all the time. Yes, I was born blind. I have glaucoma and cataracts. I can see light and shadows. Can't tell you what they are, I just know something's there. :-). Ask away! I'm happy to answer. Hope you found something to cook for dinner! My roommate, who is partially sighted, is making a roast in the crock pot, with carrots, cellery and potatoes. It smells fantastic!! Debbie

Thank you, Tracy and Kat for the warm welcome. I just got back from Maui, I have friends living there. It was awesome, and tomorrow I have to go back to work! Ugh!! Ok a little about me. I was banded in February, 2009, and haven't lost nearly as much as I want to, but I have to keep reminding myself that the pounds I have lost won't come back (she said, hopefully.) I'm totally blind, and work as a switchboard operator at an organization for the blind. I'm also a pianist and have recorded a couple of CD's, one original and another of just stuff I like to play. I've also played on other people's (friends') CD's. I've love a little bit of everything, but my real loves are sort of easy listening. I've been a musical director for local theater productions, and have done some solo performing as well as playing for others. I love to write. I love my band. I also love sweets, which is why I'm not losing as fast as I want to. Guess that's enough for now. If anybody has any questions, about blindness or anything, don't hesitate to ask, and I'm gonna do the same. And thanks again for the warm welcome! Debbie,

Hello everyone, I've been lurking off and on ever since this thread was started, but never said anything because I was sure I'd jinx it and it would stop. I feel like that's happened before. Anyway, I wanted to "out" myself, and say that I think you're a terrific bunch of people, and I've enjoyed reading your posts whenever I do check in. I don't know if I have anything to add; it seems like most of you are parents and lead pretty busy lives. I'm not married, and though my life can be interesting I do have lots of down time, too. Anyway, I just wanted to say how great you all are, and thank you Tracy, for starting this thread. It's really a great one! Debbie

I just came back from Maui, and I didn't need an extension on the plane! I got in to a cab with two other people in the back seat, and I fit! I can put on my pants without unzipping them. The director of another department paused when he saw me and asked, "Debbie?!" I can put one foot on the opposite knee to tie my shoes, or bend down to do it if I want to. No problem! I was a size 26, now 20's are too big. I went to an amusement park and got on a roller coaster with a young coworker. I kept up with him walking through the park, too! Let's hear it for nonscale victories! It's a good way to remind me of just how far I've come when I'm tempted to focus on the scale. Debbie!

I'm African-American, though I usually refer to myself as black. I have maybe an eighth of Choctaw Indian on my mother's side. I'm not sure about my father. We've had some trouble tracing our family tree, though we're trying. Debbie

Yes, it's really easy to be mad at ourselves for getting to the highest weight we do, before we have surgery. I remember coming to this site and talking about how much I had eaten one day. But the positive side is that all of us are doing something to change that, so try not to beat yourself up too much. My therapist once told me that whenever I start to think negative thoughts to imagine a stop sign, and realize that I don't have to be as unkind as I have been. Congratulations on making this change. You're on the way to becoming a happier, healthier you. Debbie

Hi, Well, you are truly special, but not for the reason you think. Unfortunately I don't have any experience to share, but I did want to say that I hope your doctor will listen to you, too. And even though you've gained 25 pounds, you're still 35 pounds lighter than before you banded. That's the way I talk to myself because I'm not losing as quickly as so many here. I know it's not easy, but please hang in there. Can you ask your doctor how much is being put in to your band? Maybe suggest not quite as much? Good luck and keep posting. Debbie

Hello Melissa, I have a friend whose band slipped, but don't know anything about having it replace due to its not holding the saline. Have you checked the Struggling Bandsters or Band Removal forums on this site? There might be someone there who can help. I hope everything goes well. Debbie