biginjapan

The three most important elements after RNY gastric bypass surgery are to meet your daily Protein, Fluid and Vitamin requirements. food is secondary because your body is converting your stored fat into the energy that drives your body. Thus you lose weight.
Weight loss is achieved after surgery through meal volume control. You begin at 2 ounces (1/4 cup) per meal and gradually over the next year and a half increase the volume to 1 cup per meal. With this minuscule amount of food, it is next to impossible to meet your Protein daily requirements by food alone, so therefore you need to rely on supplements such as Protein shakes. There are two phases to RNY gastric bypass surgery. These are the Weight Loss phase and the Maintenance phase. The Weight Loss phase is extremely short for RNY patients. In my case I naturally transitioned into the Maintenance phase at 7 months. Therefore it is extremely important that if you want to maximize your weight loss during this phase, you follow the guidelines. So when it comes to meals, it is important to follow the volume limits of your meals. In the beginning your stomach is in a heal mode. Therefore you need to follow the directions on the transition stages for full liquids/pureed foods/solid food. Also the guidelines for food types. I am an experimenter. So I deviated from these requirements at times - pushing the envelop. But then again I suffered the consequences, such as dumping syndrome. I am around 3 1/2 years post-op RNY gastric bypass surgery. I eat out sometimes and sometimes these are at fast food restaurants. I have found the chili at Wendy's to be good and a couple crunchy tacos at Taco Bell to be a good meal. Before surgery, I would scarf down 5 tacos at a meal, but now 2 is the limit or I will digress into dumping. But then again I have transitioned into maintenance. So hold your feet to the fire during your first year and a half if you want to see the results.

I've lost 46 pounds in 9 1/2 weeks. Everyone really notices it in my face! So happy I did this! The Sleeve is the best decision I could have made for myself!
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Only 3 months post oppp and the longest was 2 weeks and I waited it out.

What if you moved to another city? Or another country? I find it strange that doctors would refuse care because they weren't the ones who did the operation.
FWIW, I'm going to see my gastroenterologist next week to make sure I can get the tests that I need post-op when I return from Mexico. (no GPs/PCPs in Japan - specialists only!)

@@biginjapan I watched the documentary you recommended and really enjoyed it I am nearly 4 months post op but always a good reminder to watch shows like this to stay on track. I watched some eps of Fat Doctors too and I cried so much when Daniel died we really are lucky to have the chance to start fresh I definitely won't take it for granted. Thanks so much for recommending these.

I'm on day 2 of my pre-op diet and I'm doing okay so far. I do feel hungry if I don't have my Protein shake around (like right now) but otherwise I'm surprised how it's been. That said, I'm not on an all-liquid diet, I am allowed small amounts of Protein and veggies, so I think that helps a lot.
I blended tofu into my Protein Shake this morning with a handful of berries and soy milk and it was fantastic - nice and thick like a milkshake, but so much healthier! (I find I need something more substantial in the morning to help me make it to lunch).

Hi Walter,
I haven't had my surgery yet, so you can take this with a grain of salt if you wish.
The odds of you losing weight (and keeping it off) the so-called "natural" way is almost zero. A lot of people say you have a less than 5% chance of keeping the weight off non-surgically, but I've read other studies were the odds were worse than that - 0.015% for women, and for men it's closer to 0.001% (sorry, I can't find the study now, but I'll try to look for it). The human body, for whatever reason, will fight you tooth and nail to stay fat, if you are obese. The best book I've read so far about this is by Dr. Robert Lustig, called Fat Chance. If you prefer YouTube, my favourite videos about all things related to bariatric surgery are by Dr. Matthew Weiner. He explains things very well. You might also want to watch this HBO special, called The Weight of the Nation. If you want to see the effects of how bariatric surgery can help obese people, there's a great series out of the UK also on YouTube called Fat Doctor which focuses on real people struggling with obesity, and doesn't have the Jerry Springer-like feel of some of the U.S.-based shows.
You say you are worried about the surgery, but honestly, for most people, the odds of anything happening to you are about the same as having gall bladder surgery or an appendectomy. And those are pretty routine surgeries. But remember - if you stay the weight that you are, any surgery will be a risk, as it is for all people who struggle with obesity. You listed quite a number of conditions that you suffer from -- two questions to ask yourself is, 1) do you want to keep suffering from them and know that they will only get worse with time? and 2) what odds are better for you, in terms of being around for your family - staying morbidly obese, or having the surgery and be given a real chance to not only lose weight, but to keep it off? Sorry to be blunt, but there it is.
Is this a big decision? Of course it is. Could there be complications? Yes, but that's true of any surgery. However, I think most people who have had the surgery will say it was the best decision they ever made, and that they wish they had done it sooner. For whatever reason, sleeve or bypass (not lapband, which few surgeons do anymore do to low success rates and other problems) "resets" the body in many ways - within 24 hours to a few weeks to a few months after surgery, people may no longer be diabetic, get off high blood pressure or cholesterol meds, have no hunger to fight against (some forever, but most regain some sort of hunger pangs within a year and a half of surgery), and there can be major changes to your metabolism. Your taste buds will probably change, and you may find that certain foods that you used to like will no longer appeal to you after you've had surgery. Of course, there can be some negative side effects too, like food restrictions and gerd and dumping syndrome, needing gall bladder surgery, some depression (immediately after surgery, but I haven't come across any long-term stats about that), and sometimes addiction transfer (for example, changing your food addiction to something like alcohol addiction).

I would really recommend to write down a list of all your concerns and talk about them with your surgeon. Finding a therapist would probably also help. I don't know where you are (I'm assuming the U.S.) so if you have insurance I'm sure you'll have to jump through a few hoops in order to qualify for the surgery, but that can be a good thing, as it gives you time to deal with your fears/concerns before having the surgery.
Whenever I get worried about anything, my motto is: think of the solution, not the problem. I find it really helps to get my mind out of the self-defeating loop that will make the problem seem bigger than it is. In this case, I think educating yourself about the surgery, about anesthesia, etc. will help you feel better (or not) about having the surgery done. Good luck.

Another sleever having surgery in Mexico in February! (The 9th to be exact). I felt that time would never come and now it seems like my pre-op diet is almost upon me!

Walter. I was 55 last July 27th when I had GBP surgery. Before surgery, like you I was deathly afraid of the anesthesia and convinced I would not wake up. I also thought that at 469 pounds in May of last year - this probably wouldn't work for me. Because I wanted pizza and fries and junk food. Often ! And I was afraid, yes afraid of not being able to eat what I wanted.
Ask yourself this question - do you REALLY want your life to change ? Because that's all that will keep you alive. In another decade or so you will be pushing 500 lbs. like I was. With the same issues as you and practically confined to a chair. Thinking about leaving (not on a vacation) my wife and kids. A sober thought indeed.
Here's the good news. Like several suggested - I got some counseling. I trusted in the doctors that checked me from head to toe before the operation, and I decided once and for all - I want to live !!!
I'm closing in on being 6 months post-op and weighing in at 330 lbs. that's 139 lbs. in 8 months. I expect that by in another 2 months I will be in the 200's. It's been almost 30 years since I've been under 300 lbs. and Walter I feel amazing !!! I'm healthy and happy and only wish I had done this at YOUR age.
Learn all you can - and then I think you will see there is only one real decision to be made. Save your life !!!

Depending on the time of day and what clothes you are wearing, even the SAME scale is going to show huge fluctuations in weight. If that's going to drive you crazy, I suggest getting a scale for your home and weighing under the same conditions every time. For example, I always weigh myself in the morning before my shower. I do so naked, after I've peed, before eating or drinking anything. If anything about my schedule is thrown off, like I sleep in, or I eat Breakfast before my shower or I am away from home, I don't weigh myself at all, because I know the fluctuation caused by the different circumstances will bother me.

So your wife wants the sleeve for herself, but not for you?
If food addiction is a major concern (and it is for many), getting counselling or joining a group would probably be the first step to deal with it. As mentioned earlier, one issue that could happen is transferring one addiction for another - so I would definitely work on that.

I have 3 big goals in mind - getting to onederland, losing 100lbs, and hitting a healthy BMI/goal weight. Of course, I'd like to mark smaller goals along the way, perhaps every 10 or 20lbs, but I haven't thought about any rewards. Losing weight is a reward in and of itself, as will be all the NSVs along the way!
I love to travel, and will do it anyway, but if and when I hit goal weight (or close enough) I'd like to do something I've always wanted to do, but never could because of my weight (and lack of money), like learn how to scuba dive in the Great Barrier Reef, or climb Kilimanjaro, or go trekking to see gorillas in Uganda/Rwanda, that sort of thing. Of course, once I hit my goals I'll probably be thinking of plastic surgery, so it may be awhile before I can do any of the big stuff.

I have 3 big goals in mind - getting to onederland, losing 100lbs, and hitting a healthy BMI/goal weight. Of course, I'd like to mark smaller goals along the way, perhaps every 10 or 20lbs, but I haven't thought about any rewards. Losing weight is a reward in and of itself, as will be all the NSVs along the way!
I love to travel, and will do it anyway, but if and when I hit goal weight (or close enough) I'd like to do something I've always wanted to do, but never could because of my weight (and lack of money), like learn how to scuba dive in the Great Barrier Reef, or climb Kilimanjaro, or go trekking to see gorillas in Uganda/Rwanda, that sort of thing. Of course, once I hit my goals I'll probably be thinking of plastic surgery, so it may be awhile before I can do any of the big stuff.

What I'm about to say flies is not always well received, so I will issue the standard disclaimer of this is my opinion, and is what has worked for me (whew....):
A lot of time we want to simplify "carbs" much like "fat", but not all carbs are equal. On one had, I am almost zealot like in avoiding "carbs" - I do not eat any sugar, Pasta, rice, bread, etc. etc. In fact, the only grain I eat at all is a cup of steel cut oatmeal maybe a couple of times a week.
That being said, I eat a TON of carbs. I eat lots and lots of vegetable, fruit, Beans, lentils, etc. These all can be very high in carbs (they are universally high in carbs with the exception of some vegetables).
A lot of this has to do with the way that the body processes carbs. When you eat a highly processed carb source (pasta, white bread, etc) your body essentially treats it just like you are eating sugar. It dumps insulin causing sugar spikes (and crashes) and quickly stores the excess as fat. I consider both of these results to be very undesirable!! However, when you are eating more natural, unrefined carbs, your body does not react that way. Because these foods come with bound with lots of natural Fiber, it slows the intake of the carbs/sugars, trickling out insulin and avoiding the blood sugar spikes/crashes.
I regularly consume 150-200 grams of carbs a day on a 1200-1600 calorie diet (now that I am trying to figure out how this whole maintenance thing works!). This has worked very well for me. Even at lower calories along the way, I consumed large amounts of natural, unrefined carbs.
As he was mentioned above, I should note that I'm a patient of Dr. Weiner's, and this is very much aligned with his plan. I am a huge fan of Dr. Weiner's, and love his recommended diet. Lots and lots of delicious food, and I've had fantastic results.
Welcome back @@KindaFamiliar!

My pre-op diet starts on Thursday (for 3 weeks). I've posted this elsewhere, but basically, here it is:
No sugar, no caffeine, no dairy, no fruit, no smoking, no carbonation
My suggested meal plan is 2-3 (non-dairy) Protein shakes a day, and 2 small meals of at least 4 oz. of lean Protein (chicken, fish) and as many non-starchy vegetables as I want. 1-2 tbsp of healthy fat (avocado, olive oil, etc.) is also recommended with my meals.
I've also been requested to start taking Vitamins (Calcium citrate x3, B12, Multivitamin, plus probiotics) for 6 weeks prior to surgery, which I've been doing since the start of the new year.

I can see the difference! You look great and are obviously doing all the right things. I hope I can be as successful as you!

I'm only 3 1/2 months out, so my experience with sleeve is limited. My experience with dieting is not. I started young and was *never* able to lose more than a few pounds. The weight always came back and usually brought friends.
The deck was kind of stacked against me - as it is for many. Severe food allergies (almost all veggies and some fruits) meant I was chronically malnourished. Severe hay fever limited those easy outdoor walks and bike rides. Skin allergies, eczema, and asthma meant even indoor exercise was challenging. As an adult I sought medical help, traditional and alternative, but I was already broken - overweight and clinically depressed with a trashed metabolism and busted joints. And my weight kept going up.
Fortunately about 20 years ago (after wrecking my personal life, too) I ended up marrying one of my best friends. School, work, and two very difficult kids on the autism spectrum later, we've both put on far too much weight. Ten years of high stress and no sleep tend to do that even without help. I'd though about the band for years, but just didn't like the complications and my hands were full with therapy and homeschool. We tried to eat clean and healthy and be active, but at best we maintained.
Two years ago my father was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and it was officially too much. My kind-of-stable weight starting climbing; my blood pressure shot up; my blood sugar spiked; and my hormones went bonkers. I was 43 and my body had had all it could take. I had researched gastric sleeve off and on, but after spending time caring for him in the hospital and a year of watching him balk at all the doctors orders, I felt like Chrmow - why can't he just follow directions to care for himself? Followed by the awareness that I was doing the very same thing. I researched, prayed, and researched some more. My husband and I were both scared of complications, but math says the odds are no worse than a lot of other surgeries. And I had control over my own choices post-surgery and knew I could be compliant and follow directions, which can minimize post-op complications.
Surgery is scary and I've had plenty of minor non-surgical complications, but have healed really well. And the amazing thing is, for the first time in my life, I longer feel like I'm starving to death. I still have to make good food choices and I still have a long way to go, but I've lost 40 lbs since surgery and that really does help everything. The reduced weight on my joints means I'm able to do more physical therapy for my bad ankle and hip, for instance. The reduced stomach means I'm able to eat Protein and largely be done instead of looking for filler.
The therapist sounds like a great plan, for both evaluating "food addiction" and for monitoring/getting a handle on depression. I seem to be one of the few people who hadn't had "buyer's remorse" after surgery, but a) I did intense research into all aspects of the surgery; I had already dealt with a lot of food-as-comfort issues; and c) I'm 45 and was ready to really change. I've eaten enough pizza, cake, and Cookies for a lifetime and am largely fine with never being able to eat those things again. I've seen people on forums who freak out when they realize they'll never being able to eat a whole pizza again for comfort. I've seen the people who "can't" do liquid post op diet and try to eat steak a week after surgery. And I've seen people who realize they can still eat a box of crackers, do so, and can't seem to stop. Don't worry about the actual surgery itself -- worry about whether or not you're truly willing to change your life. Because the last few months have been life changing for me, but even at this point, it's a lot of work.
Having said that, my husband started doing Keto concurrent with my surgery, partially to support me and partially as his last ditch effort to not have to. He's lost as much weight as I have eating eggs, cheese, and grass fed meat - which was basically my pre-op liver shrink diet. Assuming you're medically capable, you can always try that first. The first week trying to get off sugar and carbs is really hard, but improves a lot after that. If you can handle that, it might help on its own. Or it might end up preparing you for surgical pre and post op diets.
I know - really mouthy for a total noob . But my big regret is not finding a way to do this ten years ago, when my kids were still little.
Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

Hi Walter,
I haven't had my surgery yet, so you can take this with a grain of salt if you wish.
The odds of you losing weight (and keeping it off) the so-called "natural" way is almost zero. A lot of people say you have a less than 5% chance of keeping the weight off non-surgically, but I've read other studies were the odds were worse than that - 0.015% for women, and for men it's closer to 0.001% (sorry, I can't find the study now, but I'll try to look for it). The human body, for whatever reason, will fight you tooth and nail to stay fat, if you are obese. The best book I've read so far about this is by Dr. Robert Lustig, called Fat Chance. If you prefer YouTube, my favourite videos about all things related to bariatric surgery are by Dr. Matthew Weiner. He explains things very well. You might also want to watch this HBO special, called The Weight of the Nation. If you want to see the effects of how bariatric surgery can help obese people, there's a great series out of the UK also on YouTube called Fat Doctor which focuses on real people struggling with obesity, and doesn't have the Jerry Springer-like feel of some of the U.S.-based shows.
You say you are worried about the surgery, but honestly, for most people, the odds of anything happening to you are about the same as having gall bladder surgery or an appendectomy. And those are pretty routine surgeries. But remember - if you stay the weight that you are, any surgery will be a risk, as it is for all people who struggle with obesity. You listed quite a number of conditions that you suffer from -- two questions to ask yourself is, 1) do you want to keep suffering from them and know that they will only get worse with time? and 2) what odds are better for you, in terms of being around for your family - staying morbidly obese, or having the surgery and be given a real chance to not only lose weight, but to keep it off? Sorry to be blunt, but there it is.
Is this a big decision? Of course it is. Could there be complications? Yes, but that's true of any surgery. However, I think most people who have had the surgery will say it was the best decision they ever made, and that they wish they had done it sooner. For whatever reason, sleeve or bypass (not lapband, which few surgeons do anymore do to low success rates and other problems) "resets" the body in many ways - within 24 hours to a few weeks to a few months after surgery, people may no longer be diabetic, get off high blood pressure or cholesterol meds, have no hunger to fight against (some forever, but most regain some sort of hunger pangs within a year and a half of surgery), and there can be major changes to your metabolism. Your taste buds will probably change, and you may find that certain foods that you used to like will no longer appeal to you after you've had surgery. Of course, there can be some negative side effects too, like food restrictions and gerd and dumping syndrome, needing gall bladder surgery, some depression (immediately after surgery, but I haven't come across any long-term stats about that), and sometimes addiction transfer (for example, changing your food addiction to something like alcohol addiction).

I would really recommend to write down a list of all your concerns and talk about them with your surgeon. Finding a therapist would probably also help. I don't know where you are (I'm assuming the U.S.) so if you have insurance I'm sure you'll have to jump through a few hoops in order to qualify for the surgery, but that can be a good thing, as it gives you time to deal with your fears/concerns before having the surgery.
Whenever I get worried about anything, my motto is: think of the solution, not the problem. I find it really helps to get my mind out of the self-defeating loop that will make the problem seem bigger than it is. In this case, I think educating yourself about the surgery, about anesthesia, etc. will help you feel better (or not) about having the surgery done. Good luck.

Hi Walter,
I haven't had my surgery yet, so you can take this with a grain of salt if you wish.
The odds of you losing weight (and keeping it off) the so-called "natural" way is almost zero. A lot of people say you have a less than 5% chance of keeping the weight off non-surgically, but I've read other studies were the odds were worse than that - 0.015% for women, and for men it's closer to 0.001% (sorry, I can't find the study now, but I'll try to look for it). The human body, for whatever reason, will fight you tooth and nail to stay fat, if you are obese. The best book I've read so far about this is by Dr. Robert Lustig, called Fat Chance. If you prefer YouTube, my favourite videos about all things related to bariatric surgery are by Dr. Matthew Weiner. He explains things very well. You might also want to watch this HBO special, called The Weight of the Nation. If you want to see the effects of how bariatric surgery can help obese people, there's a great series out of the UK also on YouTube called Fat Doctor which focuses on real people struggling with obesity, and doesn't have the Jerry Springer-like feel of some of the U.S.-based shows.
You say you are worried about the surgery, but honestly, for most people, the odds of anything happening to you are about the same as having gall bladder surgery or an appendectomy. And those are pretty routine surgeries. But remember - if you stay the weight that you are, any surgery will be a risk, as it is for all people who struggle with obesity. You listed quite a number of conditions that you suffer from -- two questions to ask yourself is, 1) do you want to keep suffering from them and know that they will only get worse with time? and 2) what odds are better for you, in terms of being around for your family - staying morbidly obese, or having the surgery and be given a real chance to not only lose weight, but to keep it off? Sorry to be blunt, but there it is.
Is this a big decision? Of course it is. Could there be complications? Yes, but that's true of any surgery. However, I think most people who have had the surgery will say it was the best decision they ever made, and that they wish they had done it sooner. For whatever reason, sleeve or bypass (not lapband, which few surgeons do anymore do to low success rates and other problems) "resets" the body in many ways - within 24 hours to a few weeks to a few months after surgery, people may no longer be diabetic, get off high blood pressure or cholesterol meds, have no hunger to fight against (some forever, but most regain some sort of hunger pangs within a year and a half of surgery), and there can be major changes to your metabolism. Your taste buds will probably change, and you may find that certain foods that you used to like will no longer appeal to you after you've had surgery. Of course, there can be some negative side effects too, like food restrictions and gerd and dumping syndrome, needing gall bladder surgery, some depression (immediately after surgery, but I haven't come across any long-term stats about that), and sometimes addiction transfer (for example, changing your food addiction to something like alcohol addiction).

I would really recommend to write down a list of all your concerns and talk about them with your surgeon. Finding a therapist would probably also help. I don't know where you are (I'm assuming the U.S.) so if you have insurance I'm sure you'll have to jump through a few hoops in order to qualify for the surgery, but that can be a good thing, as it gives you time to deal with your fears/concerns before having the surgery.
Whenever I get worried about anything, my motto is: think of the solution, not the problem. I find it really helps to get my mind out of the self-defeating loop that will make the problem seem bigger than it is. In this case, I think educating yourself about the surgery, about anesthesia, etc. will help you feel better (or not) about having the surgery done. Good luck.

Hi Walter,
I haven't had my surgery yet, so you can take this with a grain of salt if you wish.
The odds of you losing weight (and keeping it off) the so-called "natural" way is almost zero. A lot of people say you have a less than 5% chance of keeping the weight off non-surgically, but I've read other studies were the odds were worse than that - 0.015% for women, and for men it's closer to 0.001% (sorry, I can't find the study now, but I'll try to look for it). The human body, for whatever reason, will fight you tooth and nail to stay fat, if you are obese. The best book I've read so far about this is by Dr. Robert Lustig, called Fat Chance. If you prefer YouTube, my favourite videos about all things related to bariatric surgery are by Dr. Matthew Weiner. He explains things very well. You might also want to watch this HBO special, called The Weight of the Nation. If you want to see the effects of how bariatric surgery can help obese people, there's a great series out of the UK also on YouTube called Fat Doctor which focuses on real people struggling with obesity, and doesn't have the Jerry Springer-like feel of some of the U.S.-based shows.
You say you are worried about the surgery, but honestly, for most people, the odds of anything happening to you are about the same as having gall bladder surgery or an appendectomy. And those are pretty routine surgeries. But remember - if you stay the weight that you are, any surgery will be a risk, as it is for all people who struggle with obesity. You listed quite a number of conditions that you suffer from -- two questions to ask yourself is, 1) do you want to keep suffering from them and know that they will only get worse with time? and 2) what odds are better for you, in terms of being around for your family - staying morbidly obese, or having the surgery and be given a real chance to not only lose weight, but to keep it off? Sorry to be blunt, but there it is.
Is this a big decision? Of course it is. Could there be complications? Yes, but that's true of any surgery. However, I think most people who have had the surgery will say it was the best decision they ever made, and that they wish they had done it sooner. For whatever reason, sleeve or bypass (not lapband, which few surgeons do anymore do to low success rates and other problems) "resets" the body in many ways - within 24 hours to a few weeks to a few months after surgery, people may no longer be diabetic, get off high blood pressure or cholesterol meds, have no hunger to fight against (some forever, but most regain some sort of hunger pangs within a year and a half of surgery), and there can be major changes to your metabolism. Your taste buds will probably change, and you may find that certain foods that you used to like will no longer appeal to you after you've had surgery. Of course, there can be some negative side effects too, like food restrictions and gerd and dumping syndrome, needing gall bladder surgery, some depression (immediately after surgery, but I haven't come across any long-term stats about that), and sometimes addiction transfer (for example, changing your food addiction to something like alcohol addiction).

I would really recommend to write down a list of all your concerns and talk about them with your surgeon. Finding a therapist would probably also help. I don't know where you are (I'm assuming the U.S.) so if you have insurance I'm sure you'll have to jump through a few hoops in order to qualify for the surgery, but that can be a good thing, as it gives you time to deal with your fears/concerns before having the surgery.
Whenever I get worried about anything, my motto is: think of the solution, not the problem. I find it really helps to get my mind out of the self-defeating loop that will make the problem seem bigger than it is. In this case, I think educating yourself about the surgery, about anesthesia, etc. will help you feel better (or not) about having the surgery done. Good luck.

Hi Walter,
I haven't had my surgery yet, so you can take this with a grain of salt if you wish.
The odds of you losing weight (and keeping it off) the so-called "natural" way is almost zero. A lot of people say you have a less than 5% chance of keeping the weight off non-surgically, but I've read other studies were the odds were worse than that - 0.015% for women, and for men it's closer to 0.001% (sorry, I can't find the study now, but I'll try to look for it). The human body, for whatever reason, will fight you tooth and nail to stay fat, if you are obese. The best book I've read so far about this is by Dr. Robert Lustig, called Fat Chance. If you prefer YouTube, my favourite videos about all things related to bariatric surgery are by Dr. Matthew Weiner. He explains things very well. You might also want to watch this HBO special, called The Weight of the Nation. If you want to see the effects of how bariatric surgery can help obese people, there's a great series out of the UK also on YouTube called Fat Doctor which focuses on real people struggling with obesity, and doesn't have the Jerry Springer-like feel of some of the U.S.-based shows.
You say you are worried about the surgery, but honestly, for most people, the odds of anything happening to you are about the same as having gall bladder surgery or an appendectomy. And those are pretty routine surgeries. But remember - if you stay the weight that you are, any surgery will be a risk, as it is for all people who struggle with obesity. You listed quite a number of conditions that you suffer from -- two questions to ask yourself is, 1) do you want to keep suffering from them and know that they will only get worse with time? and 2) what odds are better for you, in terms of being around for your family - staying morbidly obese, or having the surgery and be given a real chance to not only lose weight, but to keep it off? Sorry to be blunt, but there it is.
Is this a big decision? Of course it is. Could there be complications? Yes, but that's true of any surgery. However, I think most people who have had the surgery will say it was the best decision they ever made, and that they wish they had done it sooner. For whatever reason, sleeve or bypass (not lapband, which few surgeons do anymore do to low success rates and other problems) "resets" the body in many ways - within 24 hours to a few weeks to a few months after surgery, people may no longer be diabetic, get off high blood pressure or cholesterol meds, have no hunger to fight against (some forever, but most regain some sort of hunger pangs within a year and a half of surgery), and there can be major changes to your metabolism. Your taste buds will probably change, and you may find that certain foods that you used to like will no longer appeal to you after you've had surgery. Of course, there can be some negative side effects too, like food restrictions and gerd and dumping syndrome, needing gall bladder surgery, some depression (immediately after surgery, but I haven't come across any long-term stats about that), and sometimes addiction transfer (for example, changing your food addiction to something like alcohol addiction).

I would really recommend to write down a list of all your concerns and talk about them with your surgeon. Finding a therapist would probably also help. I don't know where you are (I'm assuming the U.S.) so if you have insurance I'm sure you'll have to jump through a few hoops in order to qualify for the surgery, but that can be a good thing, as it gives you time to deal with your fears/concerns before having the surgery.
Whenever I get worried about anything, my motto is: think of the solution, not the problem. I find it really helps to get my mind out of the self-defeating loop that will make the problem seem bigger than it is. In this case, I think educating yourself about the surgery, about anesthesia, etc. will help you feel better (or not) about having the surgery done. Good luck.

Feb 9 in Perth, Australia.
Sent from my SM-N920I using the BariatricPal App

To quote Dr. Lustig, from his book, Fat Chance (2014):
"It's from (the) perception of choice that we derive our current societal mantras around obesity: gluttony and sloth, two of the original 'seven deadly sins.' (...) people exhibiting the other five deadly sins (...) have gotten a pass in the press and in society as a whole. ...
We've found absolution for nearly every vice and sin we can commit, except for these two. They continue to defy our society's ability to forgive. This despite the fact that 55 percent of Americans are either overweight or obese. Thin people are now in the minority, yet our culture continues to punish the majority. ...
Our society continues to glorify thinness even though it appears to be less achievable every year. Those of us who are overweight or obese are immediately assumed to be gluttons and/or sloths. (...) From this condemnation, it's a quick jump to the determination that obese people became so due to a behavioral defect."

I do have clothes size 4 to 18. As I purge the bigger sizes, it will be nice to pull it all out and fill the closet back in. But, I once I stabilize at a size I hope to purge everything else. My NSV is to have a closet with only clothes that fit. It can be sparse, that would be fine. I just really want to only look at clothes that fit for once in my life!
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It gets some getting used to but don't cheat. It's well worth it. I had my surgery 5/29/15.
I only had Protein Shakes, egg whites