anaxila

If you find a strong Decaf K cup, let me know! I used to like Newman's Own decaf, but now it just seems too weak after getting used to dark roasts.
Good luck to you on your way to surgery!

Yes I am trying not to go crazy to know when, I am assuming after Jan 13th since that is my next midlevel MD appointment and I will have all done by then. This week working on smaller bits and chewing and looking for Decaf k cups for my keurig is almost impossible when you like strong bold coffee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You bet I will keep posting mostly checking in minimum of daily to the recent items

@@flavaofbravery,
I just wanted to add (and if its not appropriate, I can accept that) that one) I 100% support everyone who feels/thinks WLS may be for them. No question. And two) I also support you getting a 2nd and 3rd opinion. One thing I just wanted to say is that I would advise you not put the energy out there that being "emotionally disabled" as you say is something that you can't do anything about. This is safe space for ppl to speak about there issues but I just wanted you to know that healing from past emotional traumas is possible, depending on the severity. I'm sure you've been to gobs of therapy, but you've got to let the next bariatric team know that you are capable, ready to go through your trauma to see it to the other side, that you are resilient, that you are believing and actively working toward emotional healing whether you have the surgery or not. I think you may have accidentally presented WLS as your 'solution' and you need to make it very clear to everyone that you will be using this as a 'tool' in conjunction with support groups, therapy, water-based physical therapy until you can move more etc etc I really really hope you can somehow get this surgery. PS, I can tell by your handle that you get what I'm talking about!

It only took me a few days to realize that keeping this news to myself is just not feasible. I’m so open with all other aspects of my life that being cagey about why I’m taking this medical leave of absence is not working at all.
I told my boss (Joe) about having surgery as soon as I got my approval, but didn’t say what it was for. He asked, but didn’t push back at all when I said I was keeping it to myself for now because I hadn’t even spoken with my family yet. During a subsequent conversation, I clarified that it was “abdominal”.
I’d heard that the head of our division (Larry) had gastric bypass years ago, but I didn’t know him then and I can’t picture him at the size people have said he was. He’s extremely fit and a true success story. As you may have guessed, Larry had an immediate inkling about what I’m having done, and told Joe that if I’m having bariatric surgery it’s a really really big life-changing deal and that Joe should tell me that Larry would love to talk with me about his experience if I was interested.
That led to a hilarious (if painful) conversation where Joe was asking-without-asking if I’m having bariatric surgery next month, and if so offering-without-offering to chat with Larry about it because he’s been there too. Joe is incredibly handsome and fit and a golden boy with absolutely no frame of reference for how to ask a fat woman if she’s having bariatric surgery. He managed to make himself understood without using the words "gastric", "bariatric", or any variation on "weight loss" or "obese", and it wasn't easy. We’re great friends and allies at work, and I adore him to pieces as a boss, so I very much wanted to put him out of his misery.
We’re close enough that I could mock him for his horrible awkwardness afterward: “Hey, could we engineer more situations where you have to have incredibly uncomfortable conversations that you dread? Because that was really fun for me!” We had a good laugh over it, and I learned my lesson about maintaining relationships and trust with the people at work who are like family.

WOW, to all of you that have posted to this thread, I'm with you 100%.
I had my bypass surgery 4 weeks ago. I can honestly say that I feel better today than I have in nearly 2 years. I've only lost 32 lbs so far, which is a drop in the bucket, but I know that without having had the surgery I'd be getting close to the point of giving up yet another time. I can't count the number of times I dieted, lost maybe up to 45 lbs. then got lax about what I was doing because I was bored with it all or something was going on in my life that triggered my usual bad eating patterns.
This is different... There's no turning back. If I go back to my old eating habits I'll get sick. I made the commitment to do this because I knew I needed the help to do it to its completion, and I needed to improve my health. Is it easy???? Hell no, but is it worth it??? Absolutely!!!
I've told very few people about my decision, just like some of you. I don't think everyone on the planet needs to know this very personal choice I've made or why. If they ask what I'm doing, I'll reply that I'm working on being healthier. That's it...no further explanation. Then as they see me change dramatically they can think whatever they want. At some point I hope they choke on their Big Mac when they see me show up somewhere in a drop dead outfit that really shows off all my hard work. That day I'll feel like the woman I know still exists deep inside, and has been trapped inside the body that has taken me over for too many years. I look forward to better health, a better wardrobe, a better, sex life, and a much better sense of self!!! I deserve it, and so all of you!!!

Okay,
1. Stalls do happen.
2. I too have stopped taking Protein supplements. I get my Protein from what I eat. 3 tiny meals per day and one snack mid afternoon, usually Yoplait Greek 100 Apple pie - my fave. Each meal is a tablespoon over 1/4 cup.
3. I exercise everyday even if it's only 1/2 mile. In fact, I refuse to eat dinner if I didn't do it. Don't do what you wish you could do. do what you can and build up from that. I wish I could do a Zumba class but if all I can do is 1/2 mile, I let that be my success.
4. I have no calorie filled drinks of any sort. I can have herbal tea with a tiny dash of Lactaid (lactose intolerance) and any non-calorie drink my heart desires.
5. I have 48 to 64 oz of fluids everyday. More towards the 48 but I'm working on it
6. I also make sure I take my Peri-Colace to stay regular. For me a BM is every 3 to 4 days.
Take another look at what you are eating and doing and make a few little changes. See if that will rattle things up a bit.
Good Luck!

Hi my name is Austin, I am 21 yrs old and my surgery is set for Jan. 5th. When I entered into the process I clocked in at 428 lbs with a bmi of 58,I really let myself go, which my surgeon won't allow anyone over 60bmi to have the surgery... it wasn't until I hit 400 lbs that I ever really let it sink in that I was to far gone. You see I always convinced myself that oh I'm young I can loose weight if I really tried. But after several,upwards to 12 different diet and exercise programs, slimfast, nutrisystem, Atkins, south beach, etc. I finally broke down, and admitted defeat until my doctor uttered his best advice. Gastric Bypass. I went for my seminar and it opened my eyes to the possibility that I won't die young that I could live a long happy life. I changed the way I looked at food and I got down to the real root of my eating problem and just stopped making excuses and got off my fat buttnd now I'm around 410 and less than 2weeks away from my liquid diet. I would love to find someone who is close to my surgery date to be friends,mentors, a confidant if you will and together we can support each other to conquer and keep each other strong through what will ultimately change out lives for the better

First you must figure out what your excess weight is. The way the medical community does it is by subtracting your ideal weight (based on a BMI of 24) from your current weight. Now, many people do not consider their "ideal weight" to be a 24 BMI and that is fine -- in that case, choose what your personal ideal weight is and subtract that from your current weight. However, for the sake of this response, I have chosen to use the BMI of 24.
So, I started with a weight of 344 pounds and my ideal weight is 138 pounds. Thus, my “excess” weight is about 206 pounds. The medical community views a loss of 65% of excess weight as "success." For me, that would have been a loss of 134 lbs and a weight of 210 pounds. If I were to lose 100% of my excess weight, I'd need to lose 206 pounds and end up weighing 138 pounds.
I am 11 months and 10 days out. I have lost 169 pounds. This means that I have lost 82% of my excess weight thus far. I hope this helps.

Y'know what? The number of folks who've died from bariatric surgery is waaaaay less than those who have died from diabetes, heart disease & any of the other comorbidities that so many of us suffer. I know a number of folks who've died after open heart surgery. Would that keep me from having it if it were deemed the proper avenue to improve and/or save my life? No way. Sure, every surgery has its risks- bariatric surgery's are very low. When you look at your quality of life and its projected outcome, is it better than the quality of life projected with successful bariatric surgery? Sorry, I get fired up when folks get anxious as a result of someone who uses scare tactics like this.

You will ROCK this! Today, I wore size 10 red skinny jeans. I started at 258 lbs six months ago. Forget the people who have problems. They are the people who have problems with everything else... because they are not having brain surgery. If you disrespect your pouch, you will not benefit. If you commit to building a 'relationship' with this new tool, you will do phenomenally. I've never dumped, or had any 'issues'. Just like those ladies who just don't breathe through contractions...they end up failing at labor and delivery. All those problems they speak of? That is just like vaccines cause autism (NOT!) Three of my children have autism, one was not vaccinated before her diagnosis. There.

@@foodfighter78, congratulations! I don't have any wisdom to share because my bypass is still 26 days away (Jan 6), but I'm happy for you, happy for me, and happy for the future. Hooray!

@@foodfighter78, congratulations! I don't have any wisdom to share because my bypass is still 26 days away (Jan 6), but I'm happy for you, happy for me, and happy for the future. Hooray!

The APA (American Psychiatric Association) recognizes something called "Body Dysmorphic Disorder" as a psychiatric condition. It basically means this (copied from wikipedia): "a disorder that involves belief that one's own appearance is unusually defective and is worthy of being hidden or fixed... If the perceived flaw has any foundation in reality, it is typically minor, though severely exaggerated." It's usually diagnosed in people with anorexia, to explain how someone can look in the mirror and describe their 80-pound body as grossly fat.
I've been thinking about this a lot lately as I get ready for surgery (28 days and counting!), and review pictures of myself throughout my life. I was "the fat kid" from an early age, but when I look at pictures of myself in elementary school, junior high, etc, I hardly see what the problem was. I was on the soft side of normal, but you'd never know it for the teasing I got and the self-hatred I heaped on myself. I weighed 185 when I got married in 1993, and was so incredibly disappointed in myself for failing to lose weight in advance of the wedding and making my (ex-)husband stand up and marry such a gross person that I could hardly bear to stand up there and go through the thing.
Now fast-forward 20 years. Depending on the day, I'm just over or just under 300 pounds at 5'4". That's a BMI of 50-51. I am not psychotic about avoiding them, but I generally don't spend a lot of time with mirrors or cameras. And now that I am seriously, dangerously, actually obese, my mind's latest trick is the "I'm not THAT fat" game.
I am literally two little boxes from being off the printed BMI scale entirely, and even the largest plus-sized clothing made by my employer has only about a 50/50 chance of fitting. I have diabetes, sleep apnea, high blood pressure, the whole package. But somehow, I still catch myself wondering if I really need surgery. I've recently realized that in my mind I am about a hundred pounds lighter. The only times I am really aware of how I look is when I'm sitting in the hair stylist's chair for highlights (they take forever, and the mirror is huge), or when I see pictures. I finished my MBA program last weekend, and I am horrified by the pictures from graduation - "Is THAT how I look? OMG, I'm huge!" I feel it in the physical discomfort of moving through the world at this size, but in my mind's eye I'm much smaller than reality shows me.
It's just interesting to me how my mind plays tricks on me. When I wasn't that heavy I was convinced that I was grossly fat. And now that I am seriously out of control, my mind tries to convince me that everything is not that bad. I wonder if I will have a realistic picture at any point: if my mind and body will match up somewhere along the way.

Had my psych appoint and midlevel medical appointment today, passed with flying colors. Stated I was a perfect candidate for short track RNY. Monday I go finish all my NUT classes. No ERG needed. have more labs, chest xray and such to do also with PCP. Hubs and I have to go to group on Jan 6 and Jan 13 go back and submit to insurance. Feeling it is finally moving in the right direction!! I did loose one inch today in measurements, IN HEIGHT! Boom there went that BMI up some more, dang it getting old too! Now to get busy on all the homework and scheduling of tests in the morning, but tonight I am ready to just veg.............

Yesterday afternoon, I scheduled my surgery for January 6. It's been more than a year leading up to this, and all of a sudden things are getting very real.
My concerns:
1) Recovery time. The magic google machine says I should expect to go back to work in 2-3 weeks. My surgeon's office says 6-8 weeks. That's a big difference. I am probably starting a new job (at my same company) on January 1 and I hate to leave them for 2 months immediately after accepting the position, but I really want to focus on new habits and getting healthy and I only have one shot to get it right the first time, so I'm worried. You can tell when I'm worried because my sentences run on and on and on.
2) What if I fail? Since I've failed at every other attempt to lose weight over the past 30+ years, why should this be any different? My need to be fat seems to be very persistent across time and space and circumstance. What if I can't beat it?
3) Who do I tell? I tend to be an open book - sometimes a bit too open - so it would be consistent with my personality to tell everyone everywhere what I'm doing. But I feel very fragile about this topic and am trying to be a bit more reserved in general so maybe I should just keep this to myself until I can't anymore.
4) I blame my weight for a lot of things, from petty disappointments to major issues, but what if my live is not magically better when I'm smaller and I have to deal with my actual limitations and not just knee-jerk blame my size? That'll be a good thing in the end, but could make for some rough adjustments.
My excitement is:
1) My health is going to improve! I have no critical issues, but lots of things that could go bad quickly, and this should address all of them.
2) I'm going to be able to travel and be active and move my body the way I want to. I can't wait to have a body that obeys my wishes.
That's enough for me for now. Geez, ramble much?

Yesterday afternoon, I scheduled my surgery for January 6. It's been more than a year leading up to this, and all of a sudden things are getting very real.
My concerns:
1) Recovery time. The magic google machine says I should expect to go back to work in 2-3 weeks. My surgeon's office says 6-8 weeks. That's a big difference. I am probably starting a new job (at my same company) on January 1 and I hate to leave them for 2 months immediately after accepting the position, but I really want to focus on new habits and getting healthy and I only have one shot to get it right the first time, so I'm worried. You can tell when I'm worried because my sentences run on and on and on.
2) What if I fail? Since I've failed at every other attempt to lose weight over the past 30+ years, why should this be any different? My need to be fat seems to be very persistent across time and space and circumstance. What if I can't beat it?
3) Who do I tell? I tend to be an open book - sometimes a bit too open - so it would be consistent with my personality to tell everyone everywhere what I'm doing. But I feel very fragile about this topic and am trying to be a bit more reserved in general so maybe I should just keep this to myself until I can't anymore.
4) I blame my weight for a lot of things, from petty disappointments to major issues, but what if my live is not magically better when I'm smaller and I have to deal with my actual limitations and not just knee-jerk blame my size? That'll be a good thing in the end, but could make for some rough adjustments.
My excitement is:
1) My health is going to improve! I have no critical issues, but lots of things that could go bad quickly, and this should address all of them.
2) I'm going to be able to travel and be active and move my body the way I want to. I can't wait to have a body that obeys my wishes.
That's enough for me for now. Geez, ramble much?

I've started a list of things I can't do today, and look forward to doing once my excess weight is reduced or gone. I don't recall a day when I was suddenly unable to do these things, but I know I can't do them now and am excited to see them return. In other words, these are some of the small victories and milestones I look forward to achieving. What are yours?
In no particular order...
buy clothes in a normal store wear necklaces without extensions wear knee-high boots board an airplane without worrying who'll be next to me and whether I need a seatbelt extension cross my legs in a meeting ride a horse fit into a wetsuit hike and schlep around mountains and islands and monuments in general ride a roller coaster sit comfortably in a theater take the stairs at work take a walk around the block without being winded tie my shoes straight use a regular bathroom stall comfortably climb a ladder

Yesterday afternoon, I scheduled my surgery for January 6. It's been more than a year leading up to this, and all of a sudden things are getting very real.
My concerns:
1) Recovery time. The magic google machine says I should expect to go back to work in 2-3 weeks. My surgeon's office says 6-8 weeks. That's a big difference. I am probably starting a new job (at my same company) on January 1 and I hate to leave them for 2 months immediately after accepting the position, but I really want to focus on new habits and getting healthy and I only have one shot to get it right the first time, so I'm worried. You can tell when I'm worried because my sentences run on and on and on.
2) What if I fail? Since I've failed at every other attempt to lose weight over the past 30+ years, why should this be any different? My need to be fat seems to be very persistent across time and space and circumstance. What if I can't beat it?
3) Who do I tell? I tend to be an open book - sometimes a bit too open - so it would be consistent with my personality to tell everyone everywhere what I'm doing. But I feel very fragile about this topic and am trying to be a bit more reserved in general so maybe I should just keep this to myself until I can't anymore.
4) I blame my weight for a lot of things, from petty disappointments to major issues, but what if my live is not magically better when I'm smaller and I have to deal with my actual limitations and not just knee-jerk blame my size? That'll be a good thing in the end, but could make for some rough adjustments.
My excitement is:
1) My health is going to improve! I have no critical issues, but lots of things that could go bad quickly, and this should address all of them.
2) I'm going to be able to travel and be active and move my body the way I want to. I can't wait to have a body that obeys my wishes.
That's enough for me for now. Geez, ramble much?

This weekend, I told my parents that I'm having surgery on January 6. I hadn't shared anything with them up to this point, so there was a lot of catch-up to do. As expected, my mom was concerned and skeptical and listened with a furrowed brow, and my dad just listened for a bit before expressing his unconditional support.
My weight problems are reflected in dad's side of the family and he's always been able to understand my experience better than mom does. He's gone through a few rounds of weight loss himself, but generally manages okay just by being extremely active and athletic. My mother and her side of the family are all very slim. She's 65 and maybe weighs a few pounds more than when she graduated from high school, but not much.
When I was 16 I asked my parents to pay for Diet Center, which mom dismissed it as silly and wasteful. Dad came to me later and said she didn't understand what it was like and of course they'd pay for it if I wanted. That was around the time he tried Nutri System, and it's the last time we discussed my weight, until Saturday.
Mom has generally done a great job of keeping her opinions about my body to herself over the past 40+ years, but I know there's a lot she would like to say if I gave her an opening. One of my goals for this weekend was to tell her what was happening without giving her that opening to pass judgment, and so far so good.

@@Dolce_xxv, are you having a serious "rethink this decision" crisis, or just freaking out a little bit because suddenly **** got real? If it's the latter, I totally feel you. Do you want to talk about it more? How can we help?
@@MrsB2007, I went through some last-minute temporary insanity where I was just sure insurance was going to turn me down, but it's all come out right in the end. I saw what you posted elsewhere about being on the cusp and having questions/concerns about not having the "right" comorbidities. I am crossing my fingers for you and look forward to hearing that you're approved and moving ahead.

I think sometimes they are so jealous they pee green!!!

Wow, I thought was the only one! I play the not that fat game too. I'm post op 7 weeks and have lost 50 lbs. and thought wow I should be able to shop and just feel great! Ummmm no, not even close yet. It was a real eye opener that 50 pounds didn't make drastic changes in sizes yet. The only time I feel "fat" is when I see a photo of myself now. But as a kid I felt huge all the time. I look at those pics now and would give anything to be that size again.
Thanks for sharing and helping know I'm not the only one.....

I didn't know other people had these experiences. My mom is my best friend. But she can be snarky and judgmental. Especially when she is worried. I'm 46 years old. My mother is 65. She became pregnant with me after a two year battle with cancer as a teenager. It was Vietnam and my father was drafted before I was born and they were divorced by the time I was 4. Basically my mom and i moved in to a house with a whole bunch of other people who put flowers in my hair and sang a lot of folk songs. Yes we were a hippy commune. The house included two of my mom siblings. And my other aunt was down the road. My mom needed to make up for a lost adolescents so basically we grew up together. We've always had the sibling relationship unless the mom who at around 27 decided to go to nursing school abd become a super powerhouse of a modern woman and mom and she married my step dad. All of he sudden I had a traditional like family. Bottom line is never sure who I'm gonna get when I approach with new news. At first she was not thrilled. I should be strong and just diet. Exercise more. We've all heard that. And my bod comes from my dads genes. She's a whole 120 lbs. but she has been incredible. She did try to make me eat something on thanksgiving. 3 days post op. My boyfriend intervened and reminded up food really is not love. But she's helped me so much. Amazing how I missed judged her on this. I can't thank her enough.

Good for you! I too struggled with telling my parents. I told them 3 days before my surgery!
My mom totally understood, her and her whole side of the family is overweight. But even though my Dad has had up and down times with his weight, he's more of the mind set, "Just be active and eat less." Yeah....cuz I haven't tried that!!
I actually emailed my parents and told them. I was really chicken! And I told my Dad, even though I didn't expect him to accept it, I wanted NO judemental comments from him at all.
Much to my surprise, I got just the opposite from him. He texted me the morning of surgery, called to check on me and even came on his own to the hospital to see me. If you knew our past relationship, this was a BIG thing for him to do and it meant the world to him.
The couple weeks after surgery when I was so sick and regretting having the surgery, I was afraid to even utter those words to my parents for fear they'd say, "I told you so..." But nope, all I got was support.
It really made getting through that stage a lot easier!!
Good luck with your surgery!! It sounds like you for sure have your Dad in your corner!

I didn't tell my Mom. Even though she has had weight issues her whole life, and even had lapband surgery in the past, she is "difficult" and I just didn't want to deal with her judgments, unsolicited (and usually very off-base) advice, intrusive questions and all that. So I purposefully didn't tell her or any of my siblings. (My dad is deceased.) But then, my son called my mom and told her even though I had expressly told him not to! That just made me nuts. So, when she called and said she heard I had surgery, I told her nothing more than that I was doing fine, but gave her no details at all and refused to get into a discussion about what I was eating, how much weight had I lost so far, etc.
Even though I am in my 50s, this is very new territory for me - setting personal boundaries and calling my own shots in regard to my life! It's a huge step for me to take back that control and not let toxic people into personal areas of my life, especially when I need to be focusing on my own physical and emotional well-being!