Eclectick

Well, If this was me, I would first sever all ties with current relationship before pursuing another one, with that being said if this man your going to meet for coffee is a good friend that's 1 thing...but I'm from the old school unless his wife knows you and knows that you two are friends and going to have coffee.than I wouldn't meet him. I don't believe nor condone cheating in any sense of the word...and if he leaves his current wife for your....he will leave you for another woman.
And if your in Therapy to help your relationship..why would you even think/dream of having coffee with another man. Fix or end the relationship your in now first.
Once a cheater always a cheater. Wrong...so very Wrong!!
Just my 2 cents of course.

Well, If this was me, I would first sever all ties with current relationship before pursuing another one, with that being said if this man your going to meet for coffee is a good friend that's 1 thing...but I'm from the old school unless his wife knows you and knows that you two are friends and going to have coffee.than I wouldn't meet him. I don't believe nor condone cheating in any sense of the word...and if he leaves his current wife for your....he will leave you for another woman.
And if your in Therapy to help your relationship..why would you even think/dream of having coffee with another man. Fix or end the relationship your in now first.
Once a cheater always a cheater. Wrong...so very Wrong!!
Just my 2 cents of course.

I'm about 9 weeks out as well, I find that I am super hungry but when I actually get something to eat..I can only have 2-3 fork/spoons of it.
I'm not doing good with my fluids (water) but my NUT told me instead of eating perhaps it's my body telling me I am thirsty. Try drinking more Water..that might help.

Well, If this was me, I would first sever all ties with current relationship before pursuing another one, with that being said if this man your going to meet for coffee is a good friend that's 1 thing...but I'm from the old school unless his wife knows you and knows that you two are friends and going to have coffee.than I wouldn't meet him. I don't believe nor condone cheating in any sense of the word...and if he leaves his current wife for your....he will leave you for another woman.
And if your in Therapy to help your relationship..why would you even think/dream of having coffee with another man. Fix or end the relationship your in now first.
Once a cheater always a cheater. Wrong...so very Wrong!!
Just my 2 cents of course.

It seems by your numerous posts that your dealing with many issues in your life, your mom, your family, your surgery and your husband..weather you know his wife or not, weather you "assume" this would be good for you to have coffee while he has an open relationship with his wife...is not the kind of therapy my therapist would recommend.
I think perhaps YOU are the one that needs to keep going to therapy and work out your issues that obviously are affecting your judgement in regards to your choices, your boyfriend or someone else's husband. I believe your should stop looking for romance or whatever it is your attempting to do with ANYONE and fix yourself and your own mental barriers, don't get me wrong...I am not saying your crazy or whacked...but you definitely have some issues to deal with before you start gallivanting around town with married men.
I'm just looking in from the outside with the information that has been given...but i still stand by my original post...don't lower yourself into thinking this married man is going to leave his wife for you..just because he makes you feel good for a minute. look at the overall picture....would your boyfriend do this to you?? and how would you feel if he did??

Well, If this was me, I would first sever all ties with current relationship before pursuing another one, with that being said if this man your going to meet for coffee is a good friend that's 1 thing...but I'm from the old school unless his wife knows you and knows that you two are friends and going to have coffee.than I wouldn't meet him. I don't believe nor condone cheating in any sense of the word...and if he leaves his current wife for your....he will leave you for another woman.
And if your in Therapy to help your relationship..why would you even think/dream of having coffee with another man. Fix or end the relationship your in now first.
Once a cheater always a cheater. Wrong...so very Wrong!!
Just my 2 cents of course.

Well, If this was me, I would first sever all ties with current relationship before pursuing another one, with that being said if this man your going to meet for coffee is a good friend that's 1 thing...but I'm from the old school unless his wife knows you and knows that you two are friends and going to have coffee.than I wouldn't meet him. I don't believe nor condone cheating in any sense of the word...and if he leaves his current wife for your....he will leave you for another woman.
And if your in Therapy to help your relationship..why would you even think/dream of having coffee with another man. Fix or end the relationship your in now first.
Once a cheater always a cheater. Wrong...so very Wrong!!
Just my 2 cents of course.

Well, If this was me, I would first sever all ties with current relationship before pursuing another one, with that being said if this man your going to meet for coffee is a good friend that's 1 thing...but I'm from the old school unless his wife knows you and knows that you two are friends and going to have coffee.than I wouldn't meet him. I don't believe nor condone cheating in any sense of the word...and if he leaves his current wife for your....he will leave you for another woman.
And if your in Therapy to help your relationship..why would you even think/dream of having coffee with another man. Fix or end the relationship your in now first.
Once a cheater always a cheater. Wrong...so very Wrong!!
Just my 2 cents of course.

@@ProjectMe You've lost 76 lbs since December? Wow..good for you.
Can you tell me what your daily intake is (menu if you will) I had my surgery on Nov. 24, and I am struggling at 30 lb loss and started at pretty much what you did.
I get busy during the day and find myself not eating and then at night I can only eat a very little, I'm not even getting my Water in.
Please help me...If I can get a good plan (menu) I will do everything..but kinda confused.

@@ButterflyMiss If you were having issues prior to surgery, then perhaps the problem is not the surgery..could it be that you both are walking different paths? If you say your not angry and not trying to control him...that is what he thinks when you tell him he NEEDS to tell you what he is doing or he NEEDS to give you the emotions that YOU need. You say your supporting him but it seems your going against him by KEEP rubbing in his face (theoretically) that you are certain his feelings have changed for you since surgery.
Is that your way of saying YOUR feelings have changed, I mean look at the bigger picture..you made mention that you paid all the bills while he was recovering, he has loans/payments due out the wazoo and you were upset that he incorporated another bill with the surgery. I think/believe it could be you that maybe you feel used and now you think negative because his attitude has changed since surgery..maybe your looking for a scape goat.
According to everything you say, that you may not see...sounds to me like your TRYING to control him out of love but going about it the wrong way with (nagging). Take a few steps back, learn to listen and watch instead of talk...relax and don't sweat the small stuff!!

Wow, Paragraphs...Paragraphs...Paragraphs
I couldn't read it all, it was too much.
From what I read, and don't take this the wrong way...he has a journey and goal that he is trying to achieve..men don't care for women that are breathing down their backs...be supportive/loving but let him make his own decisions or I'm afraid you might scare him off.
Cook dinner at night and make a healthy meal, if he chooses not to eat then so be it...walk a mile in his shoes post op and perhaps you might get a sense of what "we" sleevers go through mentally.
This response was not meant to anger you, but perhaps relieve some of the pressure.

Son's of Anarchy and The Following

Son's of Anarchy and The Following

Wow, congrats
I am 1 month 6 days and I am at a 30 lb loss and down 2 pant sizes...I am so proud of myself and this gift that is helping me achieve my goal.
I just need to get more Water in and I think everything will be fine otherwise..I feel great!!
Keep up the good work

Wow, congrats
I am 1 month 6 days and I am at a 30 lb loss and down 2 pant sizes...I am so proud of myself and this gift that is helping me achieve my goal.
I just need to get more Water in and I think everything will be fine otherwise..I feel great!!
Keep up the good work

Figured she would pray while she was down there...

That looked like President Obama

Figured she would pray while she was down there...

Used her until he found another

Bills, Bills, Bills...come every month like clockwork....wonder if we can tell them.."look, I just had surgery...and my doctor won't let me back to work yet...so your just gonna have to give me freebies this month"
Like THAT will ever happen...and if you do take off...bills get behind..and ya NEVER get caught up..I hate that feeling.
So, only recourse is...I will go back after 9 days and when asked to do something....learn the word "I'm super busy, can you ask someone else.....wait...no one smart enough in my office to handle it....geeesh!! Losing battle here!!

Although I am pre-surgery...thought this journey thus far I have done alot of reading and tried to keep up with the latest information the pro's and con's of the post-op.
Contrary to what some may think, most of the GoodWill Stores here actually have some decent clothing..some even new, and since the medical bills with co pays, and now a 2 grand deductable for my surgery...going out and spending alot of money "that I don't have" on a new wardrobe, I will just pick up some things at GoodWill to hold me over through fluxuations. I DID however, make a promise to myself that the first 40 pounds...I will get something new..as a reward...the next 20 pounds..again..I will again get something nice....20...20..20..and when I reach my ultimate Goal...I VOWED...I was going to have that Black Leather Jacket I have always wanted..but couldn't because they didn't make my size and if they did..it just wouldn't look the same....why a black leather jacket you ask??? Because I have a brand new Harley Davidson motorcycle that I wearing that jacket would look just amazing on.

24th here too, started my pre-op mess...trying to force the Water..it's hard...I've had 2 cups Decaf coffee, 1 Protein shake, 1 sugar free pudding and just starting my 3rd (16.9 oz) bottle of water...it's 5:16 pm
I'm going to sip beef broth and Water the rest of the night and if I am still hungry..have a sugar free popsicle...I have a headache..but I am sure that will pass in a couple of days.
I can do this...I can do this...I can do this...I can do this

24th here too, started my pre-op mess...trying to force the Water..it's hard...I've had 2 cups Decaf coffee, 1 Protein shake, 1 sugar free pudding and just starting my 3rd (16.9 oz) bottle of water...it's 5:16 pm
I'm going to sip beef broth and Water the rest of the night and if I am still hungry..have a sugar free popsicle...I have a headache..but I am sure that will pass in a couple of days.
I can do this...I can do this...I can do this...I can do this

I quit Smoking and Caffeine, but Iove my coffee in the morning so I went to Decaf with sugar free hazelnut creamer...still has carbs..but for a teaspoon of it...falls within my required daily intake...although my surgery isn't until Monday 11/24...I am preparing.
On the 10 day pre-op diet right now...getting my Protein shakes, Water and good ole chicken broth..and of course my 1 cup of coffee...

I quit Smoking and Caffeine, but Iove my coffee in the morning so I went to Decaf with sugar free hazelnut creamer...still has carbs..but for a teaspoon of it...falls within my required daily intake...although my surgery isn't until Monday 11/24...I am preparing.
On the 10 day pre-op diet right now...getting my Protein shakes, Water and good ole chicken broth..and of course my 1 cup of coffee...