Elizabeth21

Thank you everyone for your responses. I really feel better now and will put my mind at ease. I think the fear of failing is the root of the nightmare of a stretched sleeve. I am happy that I am not alone in this...especially when reading about the feeding days vs non feeding days. I am starting to think that I feel the urge to feed a little more during my cycle...but again it is barely a cup of vegetables, or chicken, or salad. The Protein keeps me full throughout the morning and the Protein Water keeps me full through the evening.
I am also happy that I am not alone with not drinking very slow or chewing too slow. I realize perfection is a desire that we all strive for, so as long as I pay attention to when I'm full I will take your advice and relax.
Thanks so much. I feel much better!

And can I say how nice it is to be able to disagree with someone without being called names!?!?!

Oh, the adultness of it all. HA!

This is what every surgeon I consulted with warned me of and I tend to believe it. I fooled/justified/soothed/celebrated/dieted/rewarded/entertained myself into 260+ pounds.
I have no doubt I could do it again, 1/2 cup at a time.

I drink carbonation almost every day. Can't eat more than 1/4-1/2 cup.
Now, if I wanted to, I could eat allllllll day long. I could eat chocolate and Cookies and pizza and candy and cupcakes and ice cream (actually, ice cream makes me vomit, but...). I could eat thousands and thousands of calories of pure crap every day and blow right back up to 260 pounds. That has nothing to do with stretching my sleeve, that has to do with grazing on crap all day and not following a sensible diet.

It's my OPINION that some people "eat around" their sleeves and cheat themselves back to poor health.

I will be two years out in May and I have "feeding days" and "non feeding" days. On feeding days, I can eat 1/2 cup plus a bit -- about 3 oz of Protein plus some cheese. On non feeding days, I can' barely manage 1/4 cup or 2 oz of Protein. There is no rhyme or reason to it, sometimes my tummy is accepting of food, sometimes it is not.

I had a hard time slowing down, too. I learned to cut my food into teeny bits. TEENY TINY TEENY bits and eat one at a time. If it's spoonable, I used a baby spoon and now I can use a regular spoon but I put a baby spoon worth of food on it by habit. If I don't, I will hurl.

I still can't drink fast, and I rarely manage plain Water, but I do sip sip sip all day via a straw.

Sleeves don't stretch. You can expand them a bit with a lot of excessive over eating but if your doctor performed your procedure correctly, most of the fundus (the stretchy part) was cut out, leaving nothing behind that can stretch. Gas wont' do it, liquids won't do it, carbonation won't do it.

You're fine. Relax. Trust your restriction and go by it. You are doing great.

Elizabeth21 is exactly right. There were a few weeks that i hated this whole thing. I'm sure my family wishes i had been more the crying type because I just got angry. Stayed mad quite some time lol. But I got past it and you will too. The depression takes a little longer to conquer but look at it this way - you are depressed now because of what you've done to yourself an how it's making you feel. Before weren't you just as depressed to be fat and upset that nothing ever changed?
You can do this! You can be happy, you can eat normal food ( not much of it but at least some), and you are going to shrink in size and become just as beautiful on the outside as you undoubtedly are on the inside:)

You've just had major surgery and your body needs time to heal. You WILL feel better!! Be really kind to yourself right now. Sip, sip, sip, and walk, walk, walk. Then rest, rest, rest!! It took me about 3 weeks to feel back up to speed after surgery and another 5 before I felt closer to normal. Read the success stories! It will be worth it. I just got to 4 months out and already I am enjoying so many benefits! You will get there. Meanwhile, be gentle with yourself and your body. It's working hard!
Good luck!

Weight Loss Surgery has changed me and how I approach my life. Here are a couple of significant things I notice I'm no longer available for -- how about you?
1) I am no longer a supporting actress, always putting some one else's needs above my own. Choosing myself first means every one else benefits but that's not the point. The point is I am showing up in my own life with my own needs at the top of the list. I wish I had done this twenty years ago!
2) I am not a human garbage can, lol. It's okay to throw out broken crackers instead of eating them. There are no more clean-plate awards for me. Now I love leaving food on my plate.
3) I am not down-playing my talents, features, personality, etc. and hiding out anymore. I wear makeup and have fun clothes now. I'm out there, out in my life.

I thought that getting WLS was going to be hard. Turns out, it was pretty easy. I had great insurance and got approval and had surgery six months after starting my process.
I thought losing the first 100 pounds was going to be hard. Turns out, with my LapBand, it was pretty easy. My body cooperated with my band and when I ate right, the weight came off.
I thought leaving my emotionally abusive husband was going to be hard. Turns out, once I took control of my food and my body and got out of my food coma, leaving him was pretty easy. Logistically tricky, but with reliance on friends and family and a good lawyer, leaving was only temporarily difficult.
I thought the divorce process would be hard. Turns out, it is stressful and emotional, but the actual tasks put in front of me, although tedious and time consuming, are just tasks. I am blessed with a good job and resources that many women don't have. The slowness of it is harder than the tasks in front of me.
I thought walking for exercise was going to be hard. Turns out, it is the one exercise I love and have not grown tired of. I can walk for miles with ease.
I thought asking for help was going to be hard. Turns out, like exercising a muscle, the more I do it, the easier it gets.
I thought being kind to myself was going to be easy. I was wrong.
Oh, was I wrong.
Oh, I've learned it's okay and necessary to treat myself to little things, like a manicure, or a foot massage, or a movie. But then there's the other things.
And I can't help wondering if these other things have a lot to do with why I overeat and stayed obese for so long.
Like saying no to people. I say no. But then I go into "shoulda woulda coulda" and feel guilty about it.
Like reaching for comfort food or wine once in awhile. And then I start the tape in my head that says I'm bad, I'm lazy, I'm never going to get to my goal weight because I don't deserve to.
Like going out with friends and holding my head up high because I feel pretty for the first time in years. And when a musician in a band notices and makes a sweet comment about the "beautiful women in the room tonight" and points directly at me, I find the next opportunity to gather my things and call it an early evening, because to flirt would be bad, and I don't deserve that kind of attention.
Like getting a strong lawyer who is fighting for my financial rights and future, but crying at night because this divorce would go so much faster if I just didn't fight for the college money for my girls or maintenance for myself; because if I wanted out so bad, shouldn't I just cut my losses and end this?
Like not losing any weight for the last six months even though I have fifty left to goal, and telling myself it will never happen because I've never followed through on a goal weight before and what makes me think this time is any different?
Like standing up to my mom's criticisms in person, but in private wondering if she is right about me -- that I'm making a big mistake doing this or that or the other thing, and remembering how judged I felt my whole childhood and adolescence and wondering if she was right about me all along?
This is what is hard. Calling bulls!# on these thoughts and patterns and habits.
My higher self knows it. But it's so DAMN HARD to stop the negative thought cycle, that shi##y committee in my head.
Attitude is everything. I just turned 54 over the weekend and birthdays make me reflective. I have what may prove to be my best year ever ahead of me. God willing, I may see divorce papers signed in 2015. Maybe. I'm 100 pounds lighter than I was a year ago and healthier than I have been in decades. I may be moving into a new home by the end of the year. There is every reason to be hopeful.
So why does my sick brain still gravitate toward self blame and misery? Why, why don't I believe I deserve happiness?
I may never know why.
I'm a practical person. I believe in results. So what I'm planning to do about this is purely practical. It may or may not have any basis in psychology, but it seems reasonable to me.
I plan to abort those thoughts the second I sense them in my head. Literally catch myself and interrupt it with the opposite thought.
I do deserve joy. I do choose healthy food and I will meet my weight loss goal. That person that said I was beautiful was telling the truth. I choose to believe my older daughter who just told me I am strong and a role model. I believe my younger daughter who just told me I've always got her back. I am deserving of financial security and what is rightfully mine. I am deserving of a slim body and to feel pretty. Accepting attention is not shameful. I make good decisions. I take care of my loved ones and I am a good mother. I am smart and strong and pretty and nobody's fool. I am precious in God's eyes and I will live my best life.
This is the hard part. This is the only hard part. The head is always the hardest part to change.

Maybe it's time to get a different Dr. and have the sleeve you have checked out. Kind of a second opinion. Then you can discuss the RNY with the new Dr., to see if it will work for you. Good luck to you, dear one....

I rank the government's dietary guidelines right up there with the BMI chart.

I believe that the more you have abused your body with a million different diets the more your metabolism is damaged. Last year I ate super healthy and was doing a lot of crossfit. Didn't lose any weight...because my metabolism was so damaged with fifteen years of diets and previous wls.
This is why you get the syndrome of the person who is overweight and never really been on a diet joining weight watchers and losing twice as much weight as their friend who has done every diet under the sun.
Having wls surgery especially sleeve/bypass helps to reset the metabolism. That is why this time around I am less concerned with starving myself thin like I did with my band. I have a second chance at eating well and at a good calorie level and I am going to take it. I don't want my body to think that I can only eat 800 calories a day for the rest of its life to maintain. I have found the Dr Weiner videos really helpfull with this.
Everyone is different and this is only my opinion and approach!

I lost like a demon my first three months on WWs every time. Losing was never the issue. I couldn't MAINTAIN it.

Metabolism, metabolism, metabolism. A deficit of 3500 calories causes you to lose a pound and a surplus of 3500 calories causes you to gain a pound. The thing that makes some people gain/lose at different rates is their basal metabolic rate. There are all sorts of calculators and estimators to determine your metabolism, but unless you have a true metabolic study done, there is no way you can know exactly how many calories you are burning from day to day, and therefor it is impossible for you to determine how much of a deficit or surplus you have.
"3500 calories = 1 pound" is NOT BS.
Having no way to know how many calories you are truly burning each day is what causes the confusion.

At a week out, you really aren't going to be hungry. What I did was sip, sip, sip.. It took me all day to drink a full Protein shake.. I had half in the morning, half in the afternoon.. in between that I had Water, Water, water. At night I had Jello, or broth, or Soup.
Your new stomach is still irritated and swollen, so no, you probably won't feel hunger, and if you keep sipping all day, you wont' either. You did mention you felt hungry, then said you didn't have head hunger.. and weren't hungry. At this point, you can't "listen" to your hunger cues, because you probably won't have them. I think it will be awhile till you can do that.. I made the mistake early of going to long in between meal times and had some dizziness and lightheadedness.
Some of these ladies have been around the block awhile, its best to pay attention to what they are telling you..

It's not unusual to go through a period of no appetite and for many of us that full liquid stage isn't much of an incentive to eat or drink. Our tummy's are still healing and the interest just may not be there.
However, you need Protein to heal. You need fluids to prevent dehydration. The Vitamins and supplements we take can do but so much. Unless you have some other complications that prevent you you from drinking, you need to push through this period. I too was given the minimum goal of 60gm protein/64 ounces Fluid. It took me a few weeks to work up to that and I assure you that by week 2 of full liquids I wanted to throw them all out the window. Now is not the time to try and listen you your body. Yes you need to work on getting more Protein and fluids in. If you are still unsure, call your nutritionist and tell her how you are feeling and what you are eating/drinking. I'm sure she will tell you to try and get more in as well.

@@x0CheekzVSG
The surgeons and NUTS don't give you Protein goals just for shits and giggles. There's a reason. At a week out, you are not at the point of worrying about what you sleeve wants and doesn't want. Your sleeve is still healing, so you won't have any kind of normal feelings of hungry or not hungry. At first it's all about HEALING, and you need Protein and Fluid to heal. All that other stuff you are talking about comes way later down the road. Just do your best to meet your liquid and protein goals right now.
I suggest when you ask for advice in the future, you actually listen to it instead of getting short with people? We are just here to help....

Creating new good habits is also key to successful weight loss, and a healthy new lifestyle. A couple of Protein drinks at this stage doesn't equate to overeating.
I understand that this lack of hunger is a temporary stage in your progression to solid foods... but the Protein is a necessary nutrient. If you aren't losing any weight, working towards surgeons recommended amounts of protein (and fluids) might kick start the weight loss back up. It will definitely help prevent malnutrition and muscle loss.

It's better than what you are doing right now. You need Protein to heal your body. You doctor should have given you your Protein goals. Mine was 60-75g a day and it took me at least 3 months to reach that, but I could get in a Protein shake each day, 1/2 at a time. I blended it with ice to add liquid and just sipped at it all day.

You're fine. Drink what you can handle, get in some Protein Shakes, and drink as much liquid as you can. Seriously. You won't break in two weeks.

@@mysleeve, you can do this! The reason I explained the reason for the preop diet was because that is what helped me maintain it. Knowing that it wasn't just about staying on a plan to lose a pound, but, would really make a difference. Do your best, and, if you are worried, just let your doctor know. Chances are it will be fine.
Good luck!

You've just had major surgery and your body needs time to heal. You WILL feel better!! Be really kind to yourself right now. Sip, sip, sip, and walk, walk, walk. Then rest, rest, rest!! It took me about 3 weeks to feel back up to speed after surgery and another 5 before I felt closer to normal. Read the success stories! It will be worth it. I just got to 4 months out and already I am enjoying so many benefits! You will get there. Meanwhile, be gentle with yourself and your body. It's working hard!
Good luck!

You've just had major surgery and your body needs time to heal. You WILL feel better!! Be really kind to yourself right now. Sip, sip, sip, and walk, walk, walk. Then rest, rest, rest!! It took me about 3 weeks to feel back up to speed after surgery and another 5 before I felt closer to normal. Read the success stories! It will be worth it. I just got to 4 months out and already I am enjoying so many benefits! You will get there. Meanwhile, be gentle with yourself and your body. It's working hard!
Good luck!

I suspect that your mother is very jealous of you. Maybe it is subconsciously so. My obese mother has always been jealous and uncomfortable with any of my weight losses.
It might be that your mom is just not going to be capable of understanding this decision. So, I agree with the suggestions above -- be careful with your exposure to her and her toxicity. And, just relate to her as you might a child who cannot understand. I find when I accepted that my mother was incapable of understanding of my choices in life, I felt less hurt and angry because I looked at it as not a choice of hers and not a rejection of me personally, but rather a mental inability of hers that she has no control over.
Good luck!

Another reason to drop the Protein shake is that liquid calories are just not as filling and satisfying as solid ones. If I have a Protein Shake versus a Protein food bar, the food bar will satisfy me a lot longer, even though it has fewer calories. So, dropping your shake may have the benefit of curbing your appetite.
Also, adding some unflavored Protein powder to drinks or foods is a low calorie way to up protein if you are concerned. A teaspoon is about 30 calories for 10 grams of protein.
Good luck!