cmcrider

To all who have commented.... i thank you for your input... but, i'm finding that many of those who have had the surgery seem to be a bit harsh and may have lost their understanding - or are just too different from me to relate to. TwinsMama - I have researched this EXTENSIVELY for three entire years. I would be a moron not to have done that. In fact, my knowledge base on both the physical and mental aspects of the procedure and lifestyle required are so extensive that two doctors I've spoke to thought I had a medical background. i've been on chat boards, blogs, seen nutritionists, doctors, and know I'm not "alone" - i was just hoping to find people who felt the same way i do, and have/had the same concerns. It is the "process" i find to be bu*****. it is the moneymaking i find to be bul****. THAT is what i have a problem with - along with the new statistics that show over 50% of people gain the weight back throughout a period of 5 years - and that those numbers are likely much higher considering the people that don't report back to their doctors and aren't included in the statistics. My own doctor's staff member has had staggering weight gain - along with multiple other people I know. Nobody is immune to the possibility that this weight will come back. Yes, I considered making changes prior to this. I tried making changes - and my inability to do so is what makes me a true candidate for the surgery. i have an eating disorder. i need help. it takes a desperate person to go get more than half of their stomach cut out and give up so much for the remainder of their lives. The fact that i'm fully aware nothing can prepare me is what makes me exceptionally nervous - exceptionally cautious - and exceptionally uncertain. If I could have gone through the prep easily I wouldn't be having this surgery at all. I'd be continuing the prep as a way to lose weight rather than having someone make me physically unable to overeat. No one can be 100% certain as to what their actions will be until they are in a situation. Accepting that as a human being leaves me room to be comfortable with my uncertainty. I'd be an a** to go into this saying "Oh Boy - this is going to be great! I'm going to be skinny and life will be grand." In short, everyone is entitled to their thoughts. I woke up this morning feeling very positive about the situation and after reading a few comments on this site i'm a little floored. Now I understand why a few people pm'ed me instead of posting publicly. There are a handful out there with the same concerns I have - they just didn't make them public. Good luck to all of you. May your journey be smooth and your goal come to you.

Thanks everyone for your thoughts, opinions, experiences and support. It's almost the end of day 2 - and I feel much better just having had somewhere to raise concerns and vent. this is absolutely a personal journey and only those who've felt trapped in a fat body can even begin to relate. i don't have many people like that in my life.... i'm always the biggest one in the group. being able to share with people in similar situations helps tremendously. after a day of contemplation - and yummy taste like dirt protein drink - i'm ready to roll. i will always have concerns up until the time i wake up from the surgery. i will also be a healthier, happier, thinner person who gets the gift of being around to enjoy the good times a few extra years for having done this.

Everyone raises very good points that need to be considered. Regarding "the journey" - yes, it's a lifelong one. My anxiety comes from having done this multiple times before - up to 80 lbs on my own - and always gaining it back through the years for one reason or another - oh wait, one reason - i eat too much and make poor choices. My doubts on day 1 have to do with the expectation that we go from eating "whatever" on day 15 prior to surgery to drinking all our food on day 14. that's a tough nut to crack - but has to be done to get through. knowing myself - i know that i find things most difficult in the beginning and they get easier as it goes on. i expect by day 5 i will be more in the groove and feeling good about having lost a couple lbs. VST Addict - i truly appreciate - and enjoy your candor! please keep in touch! never TMI - always good perspective to hear the truth. i've been "fat connie" so long - i'm ready to just be "connie" and enjoy life to the fullest instead of telling myself it's ok the way it is

My last post of the day.... If I hear one more person tell me they don't think my upcoming sleeve surgery isn't a good idea I'm going to go mental. My husband supports me - in the sense that he supports any choice I make that will better my health. My son thinks it's a copout. My friends keep telling me I don't have good luck with surgeries (yes, i am usually the one in a million with some strange complication) and that I can do this on my own. My parents are scared to death. I'm fearing the lack of support is going to be my downfall. Now, I'm telling everyone I've cancelled it (with the exception of immediate family), and am going to get through this one way or another. Has anyone else found that people around them lacked understanding and support? Is this common?

Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts! I wholeheartedly agree nay2120 - i'm pretty sure saying i'm happy with my life is a defense mechanism i use to get through the day. i also do all my shopping online. and, although my husband works out regularly, he is starting to gain weight. food took the place of sex in our lives. it needs to stop or we'll both be bedbound and have the news at our house while they take out the wall to get us out. LMBTX - thanks to you, too. it's nice to know i'm not alone out here!

I'm 2 weeks pre-op... September 9th. Nervous. Crabby. Uncertain. The concept of going from my usual diet - which is why I need the surgery - to eating pretty much nothing for 2 weeks prior to surgery in order to have the surgery is just not registering with me mentally. I rescheduled three times due to this mental block - and am now in day 2 of pre-op diet. I also have to get over the idea that this is a copout. Why do I need to have my stomach made smaller to keep me from eating less??? I don't mean to offend anyone out there - but for me it is definitely a personal sense of defeat to need this procedure. Anyone else having similar thoughts or concerns?

It will be an interesting journey. I don't like to exercise, either - and am a total carbo addict. i'm sitting here now trying to keep my eye on the prize while my stomach growls for something. It's interesting how different all the pre-op diets are... some don't seem to have to do any liquid and others have more. Good luck to all of us!

Three years ago I went to the bariatric seminar planning on having surgery as soon as possible. I walked out telling myself that if I have to wait six months - screw it. I could do it on my own. I'm 50 years old, live like I'm 30, very active socially, and enjoy my Friday night cocktails. Part of my problem is that I actually have a very happy life - with the exception of being too fat to shop in an normal store - and being too fat to even roll over comfortably on a bed, let alone having a normal physical life with my husband (I know - nobody talks about that part - but let's face it, it's reality). Four months ago I went back to the same seminar, told them I had been there three years ago, and was asked "So, how'd that work out for ya?" Clearly, it did not. I was immediately approved due to health issues and scheduled for four weeks out (had my pre-op visits scheduled in advance so it moved very quickly). After my pre-op class I walked out feeling a bit defeated and cheated... the woman teaching it was a surgical failure. Bypass 8 years ago and a band 2 years ago - and still very overweight. My emotions took over and I cancelled my surgery. Rescheduled it and cancelled again. Rescheduled and started my pre-op diet yesterday. Holy He**!!!! I am freaking starving! Is this for real!?!?! Honestly, I'm not sure how this is going to go..... I would love to say "I'm going to be a winner! Rah! Rah!", but past experience has shown me that may not be the case. I also don't want to set my self up for failure. Right now I'm going through the motions until surgery date. Everyone else seems so excited to be getting this done. Is there anyone out there who feels like I do? Just a little uncertain?