HappyCat

You have reached out in a time of need and you know by the responses that you are cared for and supported. I'd like to add my support and hope that your stress will be less very soon. Specifically, I want to urge you not to give up on school. I went back to school in my thirties to finish my bachelor's degree (actually restarted the whole thing, but that's another story!) and graduated at 38. It was not easy being non-traditional plus being overweight, but I surrounded myself with good, supportive friends of all ages and backgrounds and was so proud of myself when I graduated. It was one of the biggest boosts I could have had to my flagging self esteem. Plus it helped me to get my second career started. Please don't take that chance for raising your confidence away from yourself, no matter which degree you are pursuing. Whatever troubles you are going through will pass, but you will still be you. Be kind to yourself and get back onto that wagon ~ many are reaching toward you with virtual hands to help you get back on board!

You have reached out in a time of need and you know by the responses that you are cared for and supported. I'd like to add my support and hope that your stress will be less very soon. Specifically, I want to urge you not to give up on school. I went back to school in my thirties to finish my bachelor's degree (actually restarted the whole thing, but that's another story!) and graduated at 38. It was not easy being non-traditional plus being overweight, but I surrounded myself with good, supportive friends of all ages and backgrounds and was so proud of myself when I graduated. It was one of the biggest boosts I could have had to my flagging self esteem. Plus it helped me to get my second career started. Please don't take that chance for raising your confidence away from yourself, no matter which degree you are pursuing. Whatever troubles you are going through will pass, but you will still be you. Be kind to yourself and get back onto that wagon ~ many are reaching toward you with virtual hands to help you get back on board!

When I told my dad and sister they both thought I was crazy. My dad's significan other told me I shouldn't do it. My sister said that she would stay fat instead of having to go through all the pre-op stuff. Thankfully my husband is very supportive about the surgery. He knows how many mornings I get up and have a hard time walking because of the pain in my knees. I just want to be able to get off my blood pressure meds, the cpap machine and walk like a normal 47 year old instead of an 87 yrs old because of the pain in my knees. I know I want this and I know that with the support of my husband and God's will I can do this.

Ok here goes my first post, 29 years old and I live in NJ. BMI is 36 and I am 255 pounds. Every person I talk says "your not that bad" or you dont need that so on and say on. Even my doctor says I am one of the lighter patients that would have the surgery. I qualify because I have high blood pressure and high cholesterol. I have already begun the process had my both nutrition appointments, pysch and upper Gi. I am planning on having my surgery the second week in January so it gives me some time to think about it. While going through the process at first i was very excited. However, my mind is starting to play games and I am now a little scared. Just looking for a little reassurance.

ok back to square one with you missy.. get back on the Protein shakes...
get off of the slider foods... you have control of this situation.. no matter how much stress you have.. I have had so much stress in the beginning... my son was killed on the day of my surgery.. my mom died 5mo before that.. in jan after wt loss they found some masses in my legs.. had them removed.. they thought they were cancer.. but they were not thank goodness. with all this going on.. not one time did I fall off the wagon... we have control of our lives.. we cannot blame this on anything but ourselves.. you have to take responsibility of your actions.. you can do this.. you did it before.. you can do it again.. get back on the protein shakes.. get all the crap food out of the house.. I even managed to lose 4lbs on a cruise no less.. if I can make it thru this.. you can too.. im on my way to wonderful things.. im 3/4 of the way there... I did it by making smart choices.. do I eat things im not suppose to? once in a great while I treat myself.. but I dont let it get out of hand.. I stop.. I dont want to go back to the title of being Obese.. not one I enjoyed at all.. im not longer the fat girl anymore..and never never will I go back to that.. my life means much more to me now... im healthy and I look great now.. never have I ever been able to tell myself that.. I have very low self esteem.. low.. never thought much of myself... but now I have that chance.. a do over if you will.. im not screwing this up... I love my life now.. you will too if you just get back on track.. dont let food rule you.. you rule your life..not food.. re direct.. get back on track.. get to the gym.. call a friend.. come on here to chat we will get you back on track.. if I can do this.. so can you.. best of luck to you

I hope I an speak for others and want to say we are happy you trust us enough to let us into your head and world. Please keep coming back, and posting with us. We are like any other family we have our disagreements but we almost always respect our right to voice our respective opinions.

Your beautiful smile in the after photo says it all!

Cindy, sending you cyber hugs.....I can't imagine losing a child as young as Jonny.....nor can I imagine grieving the loss of a child and worry about two little ones at home who need their mommy....
I know of two non-profit support groups (free) I think they both have chapters nationwide and are non religious based, run by people who have walked the walk....their members will all have different stories, each grieve the loss of a child differently, but we all go through similar emotions/situations.
If you want info, send me a PM.....I am currently not a member of any group...but one of them helped me tremendously when we lost our only child 4 years ago.
Remembering him yearly is an awesome idea....a balloon release or butterfly release, plant a tree in his memory....volunteer with the family one day in his honor....donate a book or two in his memory to the local library or women's/children's shelter, have the other children each pick out a book.....or donate a package of diapers to a diaper bank/shelter...a can of food or two to a food bank or Soup kitchen..it doesn't have to be expensive....or making a special family play day to honor his birthday...
If I can be of any help, just PM me. You are not alone [[[hugs]]]

I know what it's like to give into grief. I have suffered a terrible loss that will effect me for the rest if my life....
But at some point we do need to begin to live again and start taking care of ourselves.
I'm glad that you are taking the steps to do that. You deserve to be healthy and to invite some happiness back into your life.
I'm wishing you the best. And we will all be here to help you through.

Thanks for having the courage to type that out. To look outside of yourself for support. That to me is a very hard thing to do. I too have stuffed my feelings down with food after some of life's trauma. Your post reminded me of something I haven't put much thought into yet, and that is how to deal with the flood of emotions to come. A few months ago I went on this super healthy detox type diet. Nothing but raw veggies and fruit type of diet. It only lasted a week! But a few days in I started getting hit with super hard emotions. Some times even just randomly reliving in my mind a very traumatic day 4 years ago when my best friend died while I was trying to save him. Also things I haven't thought about in years from my childhood. It really caught me off gaurd because I am usually an even keel emotionally. Or so I thought. It was in those few days that I actually realized the extent of my numbness. I can acknowledge now something I didn't even realize I was doing. Any moment that is remotely uncomfortable I eat. There may be a huge emotional storm ahead after the coping mechanism of food is stripped away. I saw others mention counseling and I'd like to echo that! If you don't feel up to counseling then think of a few things that you can do that are good for you and rewarding and healthy. Like, taking a walk, meditating, yardwork, etc. Anything you can plan ahead of time to do instead of eat. Or do when your emotions get so overwhelming that you need a release. Some of this we are going to have to just feel though. I really am sorry for what you have gone through. Sometimes there is just no sense to be made of bad things that happen to innocent people. Sometimes the only morsel of peace you can get out of things like this is knowing that if you live through it and make it out stronger then you can maybe help someone else one day. Hang in there and please keep us all posted.

This is a good example of believing and knowing what should be happening with your body. You handled this correctly. I am so glad you got that 2nd chance and things are moving in the right direction for you now! I'm sorry you went through the first one and it was such a disappointment but I am also glad you shared your story to prevent this from happening to others. I wish you the best outcome ever!! Keep us posted!!

I just lightly salt the Water that I use to steam it. I used to use the chunky sea salt on top, but am loving my ankles now and don't want to see them disappear in a cloud of edema lol!

It will be hard but after awhile you kind of become numb. I copied and pasted the post below and had it on my work computer and read it EVERYDAY for my preop diet. I did not write this, I can't remember who did but it is in the preop section of the forums. And yes, I was on Clear Liquids only for a week so if I did it YOU can do it. Best of luck!
Hi guys. I see a lot of you are struggling and worried pre-op about the pre-op diet. It is a HUGE challenge, but for me, it was an important one.
Exactly 1 year ago, I was in the middle of a 2 week liquid pre-op diet because my BMI was 55+ and I was self-pay in Mexico. Traveling from Canada meant that a reschedule would be A LOT of extra expense if my surgeon had to stop due to an enlarged liver mid-surgery. I had NO CHOICE but to follow the diet.
It also meant that cheating would increase the chance of complications and a longer recovery (or worse), all because I could not follow a 2 WEEK diet. Really? Here I was, about to take a seriously radical, life-changing step and get 85% of my stomach cut out permanently. But I can't follow a 2 week diet? That's crazy.
Post-op was going to be difficult for MONTHS, not days. So if I couldn't get my head in the game for the pre-op diet, then maybe I wasn't ready for what was going to follow post-op. I was terrified!
So I started the liquid diet. And I was STARVING. I was dreaming of all the foods I thought were leaving my life forever. Suddenly I didn't care that I had spent my life morbidly obese, I wanted my comfort back. I wanted to fill myself to bursting at every meal, like it was my last meal forever.
But I didn't break my diet.
Because for once, I wasn't going to cheat myself. It was time to grow up (I'm 43....) and take responsibility for my health, my future and my choices. A lifetime of justification, gluttony and excuses brought me to that operating room. Now it was time to face the music and get on with owning my future.
The first 3 days were HELL. That is when your body is detoxing from the carbs. You are using up the glycogen in your liver (to help "shrink" it) and it's screaming for replacement carbs to fill it back up. You can get through it. After 3 days it gets MUCH better. After a week you start to feel normal and more healthy than you have felt in years. You may be hungry, but you don't have the carb cravings anymore.
Most importantly, you feel IN CONTROL; and mentally and emotionally strong for battling your demons and winning. This is the first tangible proof in an unsure future that you CAN get through the post-op recovery and that you CAN succeed in losing the weight this time, FOR LIFE.
Whatever weight you lose during your pre-op diet is really inconsequential. What is important is what you gain:
- Confidence
- Emotional and physical self-control
- The desire to succeed and overcome "impossible" obstacles
- The knowledge that you are a WINNER as long as you do your best
Please don't look at the pre-op diet as a "condition" that your surgeon imposes on you (and some surgeons don't require it!). It is an OPPORTUNITY for you to test yourself, to help build your will, character and emotional toughness BEFORE you have the surgery.
It's like training for a marathon.....you put the blood sweat and tears in before the race to help you finish the race on game day. Without training and preparation, you will likely fail and you can get hurt really badly along the way!
Use your pre-op diet to work through your demons, build up your confidence and prove to yourself you can do it. If you "fall off the wagon" one day, the next day is a fresh start.
Aim for excellence. You owe it to yourself.

Hey there! You can do this! I know it will be hard at first (actually many of us only were allowed liquids, no real food for the pre-op diet) But you are going to be so glad that you did this! If you start feeling like you need to cheat, go for a walk, call someone, take a bath etc. This is the hard part, your stomach isnt tiny yet so you will just have to talk yourself through it. Drink alot and that will help with the hunger and will also help you start a new habit of getting in lots of liquids. It wont be long now! You can do it!

Lmao! You really know how to tell a story, Hathery~ Next time someone posts a question on how to relieve Constipation I will direct them here
Thanks to Metformin (no longer taking it, thank you very much) I can relate only too well. Only, I was alone in the car going to pick up my husband from work when my bowels attacked. Although I could see a pancake restaurant from 4 lanes over (I-10 W in Houston) traffic was at a standstill. Needles to say, I did not make it in time and had to marinate for more than an hour getting home. I was two hours late picking up my husband... And my booty was raw for a week. Ouch!

I am hypo and have many of the symptoms you mentioned, but my last thyroid panel was normal. I know they are mostly hypo symptoms but I think they are also symptoms from losing weight (hair loss, being cold, etc.). Can you get your TSH/T4/T3 etc tested?

If a patient and a doctor want to have a relationship, it only makes sense and is ethical that the doctor breaks off the professional relationship immediately BEFORE entering into one of personal/sexual nature. That's the bottom line.

Cut them long ways (not like circles) and mist or brush with evoo, sea salt and pepper and cook on grill just a few minutes each side, I like them with some crispness still.

After doing a search 15 different ways Dr Snyder finally came up as in network provider. I will call them Monday.
Thanks!

Awesome thread, by the way!

I just lightly salt the Water that I use to steam it. I used to use the chunky sea salt on top, but am loving my ankles now and don't want to see them disappear in a cloud of edema lol!

I think what you tell people is a personal decision. I have been very open about having had surgery but told very few people (only very close friends and immediate family) prior to my surgery. I waited until I had my surgery date to tell my parents because I thought my Mom would be very worried and upset and try to talk me out of it. I also had concerns with my brother and thought he wouldn't be supportive but to my surprise they were all supportive and no one tried to dissuade me. Guess they figured I needed the help of the surgery to lose the weight, and of course that is true. Once I was about a month post-op I put it on Facebook so deffinitely not a secret! LOL! I am appalled by some people's experiences of such hateful negativity from so-called friends, co-workers and family members. I haven't experienced any negativity at all. I am proud of my choice and speak openly about itis someone asks me. It takes courage and determination to go through with the surgery and even more determination to stay on track once you are fully healed and as you can begin to eat a bit more. This is just my experience, thus far. As I said, everyone has to decide for themselves who, what, when and if they tell others about their surgery.
pre-surgery weight 325; surgery date 2/28/2013; surgery weight 307; 8 weeks past-op weight 281.4; 12 weeks post-op 274; 4 month post-op 266.2

at first I kept it to myself.. I didnt want everyone to know my business.. that was before the surgery.. but after the surgery and the weight started dropping off.. and I went back to work.. everyone was so WOW.. you look great.. what did you do? So I manned up and told them.. and I was afraid at first of the responses I would get.... but you know.. everyone I worked with.. but one.. thought I was doing the right thing and I looked great at that point... both my jobs.. I have great support from them in telling me keep up the good work..and how great I look..and they are calling me skinny.. (never heard that before lol) they looked out for me in the beginning to make sure I didnt hurt myself at work or anything to damage the sleeve with lifting or anything.. they are wonderful people.. only had one person..and I think she was just jealous is all.. she stated to me that she will lose her weight the old fashion way.. by dieting.. and doesnt need surgery to do that... im like ok good for you.. wish you all the luck.. that was 4 months ago.. she says she is down 15lbs.. even tho I dont see it on her.. I tell her "great job".. im down 98lbs in 6mo and smile sweetly at her... LMAO Jealous I tell you.. I dont let people like that get to me.. I just know how well im doing and how healthy I am choosing the right things.. I still see her eating things not good for her..and she makes excuses.. just this once.. yeah been there done that.. thats why I needed to have surgery... so I look people in the eye..and tell them Ive had the sleeve.. they are amazed and happy for me.. maybe there might be that one time I tell someone..and they decide they might want to do that.. and lose the weight and become healthier.. .maybe they might be diabetic.. .or have high blood pressure..and come off those meds.. I will feel that I have helped someone... I was on no medications before surgery.. I had no medical issues other than being overweight.. the word morbidly obese opened my eyes.. I dont ever want that title again... huge eye opener.. so I tell everyone what I had done.. and then you would be surprised the storys people will tell you about a family member that had the same and are doing well too.. its not like we have cooties or something... we saved our own lives... we made a difference in ourselves..and hopefully with telling people.. maybe make a difference for them or a loved one... best of luck to everyone.. I just know.. Im 38lbs from my goal weight..and im very happy I had the surgery.

There are so many reasons why people end up choosing VSG to lose weight. Some people who have been abused or sexually assaulted end up heavy due to emotional eating or feeling a false sense of security in a bigger body, etc. So, I would imagine that there could be a number of our sleeve sisters and brothers that would take offense at the implication that this forum only welcomes the surgical support being sought for VST. Just saying.
I, for one, am here to lend support period. I thought that was the whole idea.