Indigo1991

GG, you look FABULOUS - and the hubby isn't too shabby either Congratulations!!!

Mmm my little cat's not enough coverage... Definitely need a guy to cuddle up to )))

Me too - six months out and getting colder by the day as the weather turns. Bought fleecy jammies, furry bootee slippers, duvet coat, hat, scarves, gloves - and thermal underwear. .. Think about it, seals aren't stupid, they have a layer of blubber for a reason, lol. But would rather be freezing than fat and unhealthy :-)))))

I love that you are finding your voice! I wrote in another post that my fat was a barrier between me and the world - it allowed me to justify uncaring behaviour in others towards me and stopped me from expecting more. But no longer... You have had a tough time but if you are finding your voice, only good can come if it. Congratulations on your amazing weight loss to date!!!!

Best advice for you is to weigh weekly. My dietician says daily weighing will do your head in because your body weight can fluctuate a lot in the course of 24 hours but you can still lose weight over a week. Others will disagree because it works for them ... But if weighing daily is driving you nuts here's my advice - stop it, lol!!! Been there, definitely more manageable to weight weekly for me. Good luck!

As someone with an anti-diet mentality (if I think I am on a diet, all I think about is food but if I think I am just eating like everyone else, then I am fine. I know, it's strange), if someone asks how I have lost weight, then I tell them the truth about the surgery but major on what has improved Healthwise for me. Most folk are fine with that. Only avoided telling one person the whole story as she has a mouth as wide as the local river and a nasty habit of getting the wrong end of the stick then gossiping. I said I had had surgery (didn't say what kind and she didn't ask) and that, as a result, I was eating differently, less volume and focusing on Protein. I was glad we only talked briefly about it and that she hadn't asked any questions, then we moved on to all her woes - but the story that came back to me was that I had turned into a diet obsessive and that was all I could talk about... sigh... But even with my anti-diet mentality, I won't lie... don't do it about other stuff in life either. But I respect that others, for good reasons known only to them, may not want to share that they've had surgery and I am cool with that. We shouldn't need to justify any of the decisions we take in relation to this surgery and how we live with our sleeves. If there's a situation where I feel that i don't want to tell someone what I have done, then I won't. But i just won't lie about it... Each to their own, would be a dull world if we were all the same.

I just feel lost ... can't find anything, lol!

Heather M, I used to get the same until I got to a certain point in my weight loss when people stopped saying it. Then, it seemed to make sense to them that as I was a small person, I didn't need a lot of food rather than I was a small person because I didn't eat a lot of food. People, eh?!

Laura, I am so sorry that on top of dealing with your own addiction, you have your mum burdening you with hers too. Tightly wound? No, I see someone who's doing the best she can to fight her demons and keep all the plates spinning, while still being prepared to share honestly what she's learned. Will that always make you popular? Nope. Does that matter? Nope. You are still an inspiration to many of us. I have an out of control mum, who has damaged me to the extent that I cut her out of my life. Harsh to some folk but for me, it came down to survival - mine or hers. I chose me. Time for you to choose you, step away from her for a while because she's not good for you if she stresses you to the point of feeling like you could binge. You can only be responsible for you. Hang in there, we are all in this together....

It's horrible but it happens to most of us. It's caused by your body going into ketosis, the fat burning phase that sees you lose a good amount of weight. It passes but keep your mouth wash handy :-))))

Butterthebean, you posed the question of whether people hitting the bottom - or not - is a factor in how they behave post sleeve. That's really interesting as it's something I have pondered while reading this post and others around enabling. I did this surgery because I was at the bottom. I had no hope and nowhere to go. I couldn't see an end to my weight related issues and ill health. I believed - and still believe - this was my last chance to live a happy, healthy life. So I have been what my dietician calls a compliant patient. I have stuck to the plan. Occasionally I fall off because I am human. But I stick with it because I am scared of the alternative - going back to my miserable, sick self. So I do wonder if some people have the sleeve too soon, before they have hit rock bottom or run out of options, that's why they are casual about what they do. I also wonder if age is a factor - for some, not all - because they are young and haven't had the 20+ years of misery I had? I don't have the answers. But I do know that I am grateful for my sleeve, every day I thank it and I try my best to work with it because I am it and it is me. I have nowhere else to go - maybe others haven't got there yet....

I take freezing over sweating any time :-) For me, life is now about planning for being cold and doing things accordingly. I wear fleecy jammies to bed, socks, a duvet and big woollen throw over the top. I have a furry dressing gown on the bed for when I get up. No wonder I am single I now also have fur lined ankle boot slippers too. I have blocked draughts in the house and put extra heaters in every room. I have very fine thermal underwear that I wear under everything. And I have bought new gloves, scarves and hats- never wore anything like this in about 30 years! I am also the proud owner of thermal socks and several pairs of boots.... Feeling a bit warmer but it's costing me a fortune, lol. What I save on food, I now spend on utilities but it's all worth it.

Congratulations on your surgery. I remember feeling scared and also feeling that everything was out of my control in the early days. On day 4, I cried a lot and had buyers remorse big time. First two weeks were tough adjusting to the new normal. But I wouldn't change a minute of it. Life is transformed in so many ways and on so many levels. Silly things like going clothes shopping and buying small sizes. Important things like losing one comorbidity and reducing my drugs for another to a minimum. But the biggest thing is how happy I am. I have lots of good things in life - lovely family, great friends, enjoyable career. But I never felt truly happy because my weight bored down on me. Not any more :-)))) Good luck on the journey, might be a roller coaster in places but it's quite a ride! Life will literally never be the same again for all the best reasons x

Hey, Ms Marylou, hope you wake up ready to look forward. What you weigh isn't the sum total of who you are, although it might feel like it. Your fiance loves you for you - if he didn't, he wouldn't be with you... You are already on the road to changing things if you are considering VSG. Most people on this site will recognise the sound of desperation in what you say. Why not tell yourself that this is as bad as it gets and that today you will start to make better food choices as you get ready for the new life ahead. It isn't easy, I hated myself and I hated my body. But you know what they say about how to eat an elephant - one bite at a time! Might look hard to take back control of what you eat, but do little things and that will start to improve how you feel about yourself. Hang in there, if you go for VSG it will change your life beyond recognition. Wont be easy but it will be worth it. And your fiancé will still love you, whatever size you are :-)))))

Congratulations - you looking stunning!

Callchrissy, sorry to hear you are having a problem but as Mokee says, it's too soon for chicken, no matter how well chewed it is. All docs/nuts are different but stick with what's on your food plan and at the moment, that's likely to be purees. Think of your new stomach as being like a baby's - you need to wean it on to solids over a period of weeks to let it heal. Even if you can get food down, might not be doing you any good. Your stomach is still numb and swollen, so you won't feel it if you are eating the wrong thing. Don't be scared, the food will eventually go down but it does show that there is still swelling in your stomach. This will pass, think of it as a lesson learned. Good luck on your journey.

It is a load of rubbish! "To thine own self be true" - if you start out being someone you are not, what hope is there for an honest relationship? Don't play games as your friend suggests, just complicates things. If you are interested in someone, what's wrong with letting them know? Men are no different to us, it's flattering to think someone likes you. So what if it doesn't go beyond an initial contact. This is about you being you. It is a risk and yes, not everyone will feel the same about you as you feel about them. But it only takes one... So you do what feels right for you. Good luck, thanks for posting as it shows me that irrespective of age, we all have the same issues and fears :-)

It's the simple things that have the biggest impact :-)))). Well done to you too

It's freezing in Scotland so I bought a new coat. It was quilted - something I would never have bought before as I would have looked like the Michelin tyre man - and it has a BELT! I wore it for the first time today not intending to use the belt - no idea when I last wore one and thought I would look like a sack of tatties. But before I left, I buckled the belt to give my mind a treat and was shocked to see I looked ok! No lumps, bumps, I almost cried. My dietician said to me a couple of weeks ago that to others, I look normal sized but I am struggling to see it. But I saw it today. Woo hoooooo!

Stand back and prepare for the stampede by those of us who recognise this behaviour! But, this time you are owning it and the weekend isn't even over yet. So maybe it's not going to be the same as what's happened before? We all get it wrong from time to time and the old ways break through. But that's life, we stay vigilant and we deal with being human. So, put this behind you, dust yourself down and jump back on the wagon. You know what to do. And you have loads of support on here. You haven't failed, you had a moment and you will only do long term harm if you do it again tomorrow - and the day after - and the day after. You get the picture. Good luck, you are almost half way there, well done

Oh no! I have what another sleever described as a sharpei butt - like the dog, all saggy and wrinkly :-(

Seela, rather than run away, PM the people in question and apologise. If the site is helping you, you need to be on it. But the lesson is - think before you post, be sure of what you say - and don't make excuses for ur actions. You may think you weren't the only one but that doesn't make what you said to someone in crisis right.... Own it and move on, you made a mistake, be more thoughtful in future. Good luck.

I think there's a huge connection between weight gain/failure to lose for some of us. I could justify my lack of interest from my ex because of my weight and pretend things were otherwise ok - they weren't. Once we separated, my weight kept me from looking for a new relationship or even casual dating. It was a physical barrier and I think I subconsciously didn't want to lose it. It kept the world away from me. When I started to feel better about me, I didn't want to be ill (I had 2 comorbidities including diabetes) or fat any more. I didn't want to be hidden. So, while starting dating frightens me, it's also exciting. It's not just that I am ready to meet someone new, it also signals that I feel good about me, no need to hide :-)

Thanks for all the suggestions. Not in a rush to drink but now have some ideas of what I might try. Might try it at home first in case I get the instant tipsy thing and see how long it takes to go. Am now a very cheap date - 1 drink and a starter sized portion of food and I'll be done :-))))))

Globetrotter, now thinking about grilled cheese - oh dear! Forgot about port, that might be nice..... Erp, I am ashamed to admit it but despite being Scottish, whisky and I don't get on. Just a sniff goes straight to my head but Fireball sounds fab!