kimalicious

Vines, you are not a fruad, I felt the same way and left for 6 months from this board and during that time gained 6 pounds back. What other year can you ook back and see that you have lost this much weight and continue to keep it off. I know that is what keeps me happy about my weightloss even when the scale isn't moving. I came back to this board after a well needed fill and have been moving down ever since. I need this community to keep me on track and keep me sane when I fall off the track. Don't ever leave, just re-evaluate and see what can be changed and what processes to try next, Don't give up, we need you!

Vanessa, so true: "God wouldn't take anything away from without giving you something much better. I can tell you from my own life that this is true. Try to believe that if someone turns their back on you when you are succeeding at something, then they may never have been your friend. Misery loves company." I do feel like I am trying to better myself in many ways, but I also feel like I am being a snob when I feel this way, like I am making myself BETTER than they are. My husband so far is much better to me than any of my friends were recently. Candy, 25 was when it all changed for me because that is when I got married, I sit back and wonder if I could have been different or done something different, or maybe I was acting different. Now, that best friend who left me at the beginning of my engagement is going through some of the same things with her new friends due to her new engagement, so I am hoping she understands. She is never someone I can be close to again, because I am always scared she will "dump" me again, but I have always tried to forgive and not hold a grudge because I am still close to the rest of her family and wouldn't want to cut that off completely. Maybe I just need to come to terms with the fact that they will just be good memories I have and I will never have that again, especially not be able to go back. I also need to learn to be happy with what I have in front of me...which has always been a downfall of mine. Sarah, I am dealing with it that way too, I have never been closer to my mom, she is the only one besides my husband that goes shopping with me and out to eat and she is supportive and listens to me when I need her. She knows what I am going through with my weight loss since she herself just lost like 80 pounds from Atkins. To me it is not the same as those friends, but I am glad ya'll helped me with my post, I needed to hear all of this. I just needed perspective and I can always come here and get it. Thanks Y'all!

Can you ship me some of your basic instincts please, I will give you my mailing address and I will order 100 boxes please!

so true about the blessings, I couldn't have found a more loving husband. He may not bring the fun, crazy girl out in my like my old friends did, but he is my rock, stable and loving. I guess I feel more rejected than anything and I am going through a stage where I am lackin in self esteem right now. Seems like the more weight I lose the more I see I have to lose and the fatter I feel because I haven't lost it all yet. I feel like I am bigger now than I did when I was 60 pounds heavier, probably because I am actually trying hard at it now and focusing more on my looks. It is crazy what a mind messup fat can be.

It's good and bad to see that docs make you go through so much now. I had 1 appointment a blood test and then the surgery, other appointments or test, probably too easy, I feel like we should all have to go to a therapist or nutritionist before our surgery to start conquering our food demos. Congrat to you, I know how excited you must be and I have United Healthcare also, my doc charged them so much for the surgery I only had to pay like $650 out of pocket! Good luck the best part is coming ahead!

I am having a really hard time this holiday season. I am saddened by a lack of close friends this year. Since I was very young I have always had tons of friends around, and for years the very same close friends that was one big close group. Well, between fights, marriages, everyones work and just lack of trying we are all no longer hanging out and may only see each other 2 times a year. By all, I mean they have moved on to other friends because I got married and I am stuck alone while they go out and have a good time with all of their new friends and aquantainces. I;'m sure some would say our previous group were too close, but that is how I liked it. I have never had a problem making friends in the past but I am at a standstill in life where I am very busy with school and work. I am used to all of us going out for Christmas and birthdays and any event we could make up to have an excuse to go out and now I feel like I am all alone. I do have my wonderful husband and would not have been able to get through all of this without him, I am just feelin lonely and wanting for the times we used to have together. I don't like most of the people I work with and we get moved around so much up here that it is hard to make a close friend you would actually see outside of work. I'm tired of trying to make new friends that will never live up to what those friends were and I'm tired of feeling lonely. I feel like I lost a family and support system all in one and maybe it is just the holiday's talking but it is really upsetting me. Why is it so hard to find good, strong, loyal friends when you start getting older?

I love my black and white cocker mix SISSY, she has an underbite so her bottom teeth are always showing. SHe is so much fun and loving and when she is not feeling well, I am down and vice versa. She can sleep longer than anyone I know and since she is home inside all day when we go to work that is exactly what she does. We got her from a no kill shelter in the Dallas area and couldn't have been bleesed by a better pet. Money has been short lately so she hasn't gotten her regular haircut in a few months and she is getting mutton chops. I wouldn't know what to do without her and I sooo wasn't an animal person. I am hooked now!

Ok no one hit me, I have been eating to the point of PB, like my band has made me a freakin bulemic. I have continue to lose weight though, slower than usual but about 2 pounds a week with no exercise. So I know that is not a plan and I will no longer do this since I just read what I typed and figure I would yell at anyone else on hear that said it. I will blame it on the stress of the holidays and finals at school while working a 50 hour week at work too. Diets suck, sorry I can't help!

hot boss, hot Dr. Billy, hot husband, you just know how to work em!

Can I just say hot, and hubby is hot too and you can tell he is happy to have you on his arm, you've come a long way baby. Ok, I know that was a bad 80's cigarette quote, but I that was what I thought. PS. I have that shirt in turquois and love it.

I completely hate soup, so I during mushies I had refried beans and pudding and oatmeal and mashed potatoes every day. That was wonderful after being on liquids for 2 weeks so I didn't care. Good luck girly!

poor thing, we have all been there. If I eat in public I make sure I am sat near the bathroom just in case and if not I know where the bathroom is before I start eating. Sad but true.

Penni, I am so sorry to hear that, your daughter is right, listen to her. Crappers that sucks, but being felt up by a hot doc should make it all the more easier to endure. Good luck tonight!

Agree with everyone, plus what if you are like others and can't get the fill just right again and have to continue for months going back and forth with fills and unfills until you get it right? I say eat what you can and let your band restrict and do it's job and you will be happier with yourself in the end.

Lisa, Have fun in San Antonio, I was just there in April and had a blast! I love the riverwalk, you have to go to Polly Esters while you are there, they have 3 flights, bottom floor is current dance music, 2nd floor is 70's disco and 3rd floor 80's retro, we had a blast there and Coyote Ugly's was fun too. I am from Mesquite a suburb of Dallas and love every city in Texas. It just now got cold, so I doubt you will be riding bikes, but you have to tell me how much fun you have so I can live vicariously through you...you made me think I need to hook up with some old friends to get out of my funk. Funny how old friends bring you back to reality sometimes!! Have fun!

Ya had to go make me cry today. I am sincerely sorry for your loss. I am new to the dog game and can't bear to think of being without mine now. They are better friends than humans and unconditional, we all need to remember what they teach us, so true so true. Cherish the memory all you can!

I was having the same problem and bam!!! PB yesterday all day. I know it is sad to be happy about that but I don't care!! I have restriction again, here's to hoping it will last all through the holidays!!

Yes and when I am sitting compared to standing and the belly slightly rolls on top of the jeans and backs up to the band. I was slouching really bad the other night and my band hurt for like 5 hours after I realized I had been sitting that way for so long. I hope I didn't stretch somethin

I am so glad to hear you are ok!! Here is to a speedy recovery and hopin the scar tissue will act like a permanant band for the rest of your life!!!

I just had the same problem happen, I could only get down like half of a grilled chicken sandwich at most in any meal and now its like the difference from one day to another. I still have restriction, but nothing like it was. I was able to eat an entire grilled chicken sandwich for lunch. This has been going on since Thanksgiving day when I surprised myself by getting down all sorts of things I haven't been able to eat since my last fill on Oct 3rd, like a roll. I have had no other problems like reflux or pain. I have lost 22 pounds since my last fill so I wonder if We have just lost some fat around our stomachs and the band has loosend? I just can't imagine it would be so night and day after 1 day. Let me know what your doc says please, because I won't have time off until after the new year for my endo. Thansk, kim

YEEEHAW~~ I love the SCOR!! They are so cool. That should give us all hope.

SO ok, I have been this board talking of how wonderful it has been to be restricted, the weight is just flying off since my last fill October 3rd and there are some meals I can't get more than a few bites in which I love when I hit the scales the next day. So why now all of a sudden I can eat again? Even in the morning. I still have some restriction, but not what I was getting. Ever since Thanksgiving when I could eat more than a few bites and at lunch today I went to eat my normal half chargrilled chicked sandwich lunch and noticed I ate 3/4's of the sandwich before I threw it away and still wanted more and it only took 30 minutes later for me to be hungry again. Before I would have been stuffed for hours. Why can't I keep the restriction I had, I feel like I am fallin back into the rut I was in before eating everything. I had come to the fact that I just couldn't eat certain things anymore and wouldn't even try. I know it is a mind game, but now I want to try those things again to see if I can get them down even though I know I shouldn't. I'm sorry this is long and I know not so important with everyone elses problems, but have I slipped too or is losing restriciton a few months after every fill normal? You would think I would know this by now, but I don't. Also, my surgeon sent me a letter saying it has been a year since my surgery and they want me in for an endo to check it out since it has been a year. I thought that was pretty cool except it is a day event and you are not suppose to drive after. Since I have no time off the rest of the year I will have to wait until January to schedule. I wonder if I should schedule sooner??

I am so listening at night also when my water goes down and think I am gurgling more. I am so hoping it is just my imagination. One meal I am so restricted I can't get more than 5 bites down and then last night I am able to eat half of one of those little 99 cent Tostinos pizzas. I haven't been able to eat like that in months. Why all of a sudden now? Because I am eroded and it can slip though easier. I swear, that is why we are all so crazy, this thing has never felt the same day in and day out since I got it. I am constantly wondering about the differences and now constantly worried for an erosion or slip. I have always PB'd, but even before my band I was a spewer because I am very sensitive about my food settling right. I need some beatings since Thanksgiving also, I have wanted to eat everything in sight...I try, then PB, then try again. I need to be stopped!

It took me 3 fills to get restriction. Just leep getting them until they get it right. THe band can't work without the fills...in the mean time try to fight that craving knowing it will make it easier once you have restriction not to be such a sudden change.

It was an interesting show, some people are so unhappy with their weight but also unstable enough to have the time to work on it too. I think that is Wynona's problem. It's hard to make the time for yourself, it's even harder to decide to make the time for yourself. I was also wondering why they didn't talk about someone who had the lap-band and think that shocking thing was scary, but I don't think it would be enough for me, even if I feel full I eat, so unless I have my band completely stopping me I would keep on keepin on! HA!