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A New New Dawn

Gastric Sleeve Patients
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Blog Entries posted by A New New Dawn

  1. A New New Dawn
    Though I often read the blogs, I rarely write my own.....
     
    Well, this time is different!!!!
     
    This weekend my fiance and I went to Six Flags Great America with my daughter and 2 of his kids. He hadn't been to an amusement park in over 20 years. For me, it hasn't been that long since I have been there (it's only 45 minutes away). I have been there and to several other amusement parks through road trips with the kids and family as well. I always wanted my kids to have fun, even though I had to wait while they went on the rides as I was too big to ride. My kids always had a great time but I felt an emptiness that I could only stand on the sidelines and not have fun WITH them.
     
    In addition, my sister ended up meeting us up there yesterday with her boys and husband. My b.i.l. is quite overweight and unable to go on the rides. Of course, he and my sister gave other reasons, but having been there... I got it. It was sad knowing that was ME for so many years.
     
    Well, a year after being banded and down 80lbs. I WENT ON THE FREAKING RIDES AND I FIT!!! The best part of the day was going on XFlight w/ my daughter, for the first time, and her looking over at me, doing a fist pump and saying she was proud of me and asking if I was excited. HECK YAH I was. I even rode the go karts and bumper cars w/ my fiance's son and have always avoided those as well as the seatbelt wouldn't fit!
     
    I am still a ways from goal, but this was a great reminder of what I have been missing out on in life and how much more this is than just losing weight. We walked the park for 12 hours (yes, from open - to close) and though I was exhausted, I DID IT!!
     
    YAY, ME!!!
  3. A New New Dawn
    I am not sure where the phrase was coined but "living large" no longer has negative connotations for me! I used to hear that and think instantly of my size. Now it is about how I want to live my life.
     
    Only 3 weeks post op and I already am feeling like a new person. I feel much more confident in myself and am already feeling revitalized and a renewed outlook on the future.
     
    I have found myself wandering the clothing aisles at stores and not dreading looking at size 22 but venturing down a few sizes thinking that will be me soon!!!! I had heard the "BMI" term used over the years and never gave it much thought before this surgery. Now, I am excited by that #. I have had two visits with the surgeon post-op so far and the # has dropped from 50.5 to 45.5 already! If I can make that significant of a difference in it in just weeks, imagine months from now!!!
     
    I have found strength to not long for my (former) favorite foods, even when they smell and look so good within my reach. It is actually quite empowering to have that will power now. I am not saying I will never mess up, but that "flub" doesn't have to define me and doesn't mean I am completely off the wagon. It just means I need to make better choices for my next meal. Heck, people that are healthy and thin overeat or indulge from time to time. It's all about moderation and being accountable to myself.
     
    I know I can do this. Admittedly, the first couple days I had a few "feel sorry for myself" moments but I got myself into this and I need to get myself out!
     
    My goals are not to look like Cindy Crawford or Kim Kardashian. My goals are what will make me feel good, not worrying about going to events where there may be a turnstyle, not having to retake photos all the time because I don't like how I look in them, getting off BP meds, hopefully ridding myself of sleep apnea and then all the little things - enjoying going clothes shopping in the misses (not women's) dept, not tiring as easily, crossing my legs (cannot wait for that, even if it isn't good for your circulation), and my goal for next summer - going to the amusement park I have avoided for years!!!!
     
    No time for pity parties ~ time to start LIVING LARGE!!!

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