I paid $3.79 for that Muscle Milk; so, by golly, I choked that protein DOWN. lol
Shopping today I started making healthier choices for my family. Not rice cakes, exactly, but better quality food which I thought would be healthier than chips and cookies. Cost money to eat a little better, it does. But it's so worth it. I am so glad I am able to exert this gentle influence on their eating habits. This is what I bought for them for snacks: lightly salted, dry-roasted peanuts, honey-roasted peanuts, trail mix (yes, with m&m's), beef jerky, whole wheat muffins, ww bagels, 1% milk instead of 2%. Fruit & juice, but that's not new. I realize this isn't ringing the bell for best nutrition, but it's much better than what they have been eating.
I'm encouraging my 15-year-old to drink protein in the morning if he's going to skip breakfast. Both of my kids have been skipping breakfast, even though it is served at school and they have a charge account.
I've missed a couple of evening walking sessions because of exhaustion and taking naps. I realize that may sound lame (no pun intended) but it's true nonetheless. I am not going to "push through" any more than I have to. I don't want to make myself sick with overexertion; mostly, I feel this way because I can't handle the mental stress that goes with being soooo tired. If I get too tired, I will freak out. That is my experience.
Even so, I'm doing more than I have in recent years.
Earlier I posted this post about being sick of the sleeve and desperate and doing the duodenal switch...blablabla...yada,yada,yada........
Then I went back to the gym to play a game of squash.We played hard and fast and my goodness it felt soooo good.
This all made me decide that I will lose more weight.Even if I have to learn to run a hundred km at a time.I will do whatever I can to lose the last 38 pounds.
My friend is a personal trainer and I will start train with him next week.I need to start doing some serious muscle building.
My goodness,why would I not lose weight if I really work hard?Why do I feel that its not fair that my weight loss have stopped?Who said life was fair?
No more chip on my shoulder about this.Yes,I might have terrible days where the scale might affect my mind but I will think positively about losing weight and getting to goal.
Tomorrow morning before we go out with friends I will do some exercise and in the afternoon I will either go and swim in the sea or I will go walk while it is still 97 degrees!(swim sounds like fun!)
So I’ve been feeling a bit … I don’t know … down, disheartened, unsuccessful…. I don’t know what the word should be… For one thing, I’ve been really sick for the last ten days with a combo cold/allergy thing. I’m finally feeling better physically and mentally, so here I am.
Another reason for my “mood” is that when I went for my last dr visit, at my four-week mark, I had only lost 5 lbs. This was so disappointing after my huge second week loss. I had to remember that I had been storing a huge amount of fluid for almost two years so that was the first thing to come off. Needless to say, I was a bit anxious about my doctors appointment yesterday.
I had decided that I needed to take a chill pill and give myself a bit of credit. I’ve on this challenge and have been pretty successful with the huge change in my life. I’ve kept my protein intake up and am (aside from the cold from hell) feeling pretty fantastic. I also reminded myself that it took a long time, for the most part, to get here and it will take a while to take it all off and as long as I continue to go down, even if its one pound at a time, it’s an improvement.
So with this pep talk under my figurative belt, I bravely (cough) went to my doctor’s appointment yesterday. This was my family doctor who I last saw the day before my surgery so I actually was pretty stoked to show him my success to this point. Actually, it was the first time I’ve been happy to be weighed in at his office in the last two years. Prior to this, I had been gaining every time I would go in. It was frustrating for me but also to my doctor because we could not stop whatever was going on. Last time I saw him, I had a raging case of cellulitis on my left leg, not to mention that the same leg was twice (at least) the size of my right leg.
Thank goodness that my anxiety was short-lived!! I had lost 8 lbs and that officially put me under 300 lbs!! This is the first time in almost two years that I have seen that! This brings my official weight loss to 45 lbs in six weeks! Yeah me!! My doctor was also very pleased with my progress. Not only had I lost a lot of weight but I no longer had cellulitis and the swelling is gone from my legs. And even though I’m still sneezing, my O2 stat was at 89, and I’m still not feeling 100%, he (and I) were so excited that my lungs were totally clear!! You have to understand that prior to this, every single time I would get a cold it would mean weeks of recovery, antibiotics, and a general miserable existence until it would clear up. Not only did this not happen this time BUT I really didn’t even have to increase my medications (nebulizer etc) this time. Very little wheezing, huffin’ & puffin’, etc… Yeah! I’m loving this new life!!
So, with my usual positive outlook back in order (and great drugs keeping the nose under control!) I decided to take inventory of what I am able to do now that I could not do six weeks ago or for the last two years, for that matter. Now I understand that if you have never been large then you may not realize what a huge accomplishment these things are but if you have walked in my shoes at all…. you get it!! So here we go…..
The first thing I noticed, of course, was that I could breath. I know I have mentioned this in previous entries but when you feel like you are suffocating 24/7, it is pretty major. Of course, with this obstacle pushed somewhat to the side, I am now able to walk without feeling like I’m going to have a heart attack or pass out at any moment. I can put on my bra by myself. I know, you are thinking “What?” well I could not reach around behind my back and hook my bra so my dear hubby had to do it for me. I think he kinda feels left out now! lol I can take a shower without having to sit down as soon as I get out AND I can shave my legs with ease!! I can fix my hair win half the time that it was taking me. I also have not heard my husband ask me “Why are you breathing so hard?” for a while now. (Yeah!!) There are a lot of other things but the latest two things just happened in the last week or two…. I put on and tied my own tennis shoes with the bow ON TOP and I painted my toenails this morning! I even got a compliment from one of my bosses… she thought I had gotten a pedicure!! Again YEAH!!
So with this happy evalutation, I am now looking forward and will hopefully keep the negativity at bay. Happy journey and Hugs!!!
