Caribear

I agree, there are many other people who go through the same thing. I haven't been banded yet but have spent quite a bit of time dealing with food issues. Maybe you can consider talking about it with a therapist. That's what I have been doing. I won't lie, it's not easy to deal with and I don't think it ever really goes away completely, but you can control it with the right tools. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is the thing that helped me the most. It will help teach you that those feelings are normal, and that it's ok to have them, and that even though your brain may be telling you that you will die without ice cream, you really won't. I wish you good luck, whatever your decision, and I will pray for you. You can do this!

I'm so sorry. I can't imagine how hard that must be. I will be praying for you as well. I wish I could do or say something to lessen your pain. I have not personally had this happen to me, but if you need someone to talk to I will be glad to listen.

I'm so sorry you've had to go through this. I haven't been banded yet either, but I have to agree that it seems strange that any surgeon would want to risk doing the surgery again if you have already rejected one band. Unless the new band is made completely of different material than the first, it wouldn't be a good idea to risk having the same thing happen imo. Maybe you could even run this by your primary care doc and see if he/she thinks it's a good idea. I know a primary care doc is not a lap band specialist, but they should have enough of a grasp of foreign body rejection to at least give you an opinion as to whether you should try it again or not. I'm just concerned about your health and the safety of a second procedure.

Hi Maggie, it's great to see someone with such a great sense of humor about such a sensitive issue. I wish you the best of luck, and I will be praying for you to have a speedy recovery and lots of success.

@MrsBaxter, I'm sorry that you have had to go through this too, but it is nice to know that I'm not the only one who has struggled with this issue. You are so right, we can do all things through Him. @Zil, Thank you. I am trying to drive out that little nagging voice of doubt, because I know that it is the devil trying to bring me back down. But you are right, Christ lifts me up every time. @Pink Dahlia, You're very right. Isn't it funny though how we wouldn't hesitate to get treatment for any other health condition, but obesity is something we are supposed to handle on our own? Like we somehow asked for this in the first place? (I think I'll have to rant about this in a later blog post )

One of the most confusing and frustrating internal road blocks I have come across in regards to getting lap-band is how to reconcile my faith with the need to have this surgery done. Within the past few years, I have re-committed myself to my faith and become saved for the second time in my life. Don't get me wrong, I won't beat anybody over the head with my Bible (lol) but I don't hesitate to tell anyone who will listen about God's love for them and Jesus' ultimate sacrifice. I think it's amazing how God, who made every single thing in the universe, still cares about each and every one of us. It also blows me away how Jesus loved us all so much that he died to save us. There aren't enough words for me to tell how much I am deeply moved by this, and I spend time each day in prayer thanking the Lord for everything he has done for us. The problem is this - there's a little voice in the back of my head that says "You know, if you were a better Christian, you wouldn't need surgery. If your faith were stronger, you would be healed by the grace of God, not need to turn to surgery by the hands of a man. It's just because you don't pray/believe/give/whatever enough that you have to do this." It's a hard thing to ignore. How do you reconcile the idea of having surgery with God's promise to heal His children? Jesus healed many, many people, and he always explained it by saying that it was their faith that caused them to be healed. So what does that mean for people like me? Can it be that I simply don't believe strongly enough in my God's ability to heal me? I know that He can do all things, because He has created all things. Don't get me wrong, I am not the perfect Christian. I don't read my Bible every day. I'm not always as patient as I should be. I don't have a church home. I even swear on occasion (*gasp!* ) But I do love Him and seek Him out, and I am trying. And so far as I can tell, that's all that we can do. We are not God, we are human, and no human is perfect. One day I was in the midst of one of these "doubting sessions" and beginning to think that maybe it was true, maybe I was just an awful Christian and not worthy of healing. Just as I was beginning to entertain this idea, a thought came to me: Who do you think gave the surgeon his gift? Who do you think made the surgeon to begin with? How do you think this surgery was even thought up in the first place? And then I realized that maybe it was not surgery vs. faith; maybe my healing will be done through this surgeon because this is how God intends to heal me. It's not a question of turning to modern medicine and away from God, because it was through God that modern medicine came to be. He gave us an inquisitive nature, He made people who aspired to help others, and He gave us the ability to create technologies that can improve the health of many. I think we tend to compartmentalize "God over here, science over here" as if they are two different and opposing things. I believe they are not. I hope that anyone reading this with the same problem that I had can be comforted by the realization that not all healings are of the "miraculous, out-of-thin-air" type. There are all kinds of different ways that God can manifest healing in your life. Don't beat yourself up over a problem that doesn't exist. In the words of my son's favorite animated tomato, "God made you special, and he loves you very much."

@Shelley, thank you for going to the trouble to find the article and post about it. I really do appreciate that. @Elcee, I have to agree that his show is not what it used to be. I like the fact that he brings attention to some things that need to be discussed, but it seems like lately it's a lot of hype and not a whole lot of content. I used to watch him every day, but then I realized that at the end of the show, he hadn't really said anything definitive. @Pink Dahlia, thank you for the support. My mom is coming around, and she is going with me to my seminar. I keep putting the facts in front of her, and she is starting to see that it's not as scary as she thought it was.

OK, this entry is a little long-winded, but bear with me. I will get there eventually. The day my rheumatologist first brought up the idea of bariatric surgery was a hard day for me. Not so much because of that particular appointment, but because of the one after it. I had to drive to Dayton, see my rheumatologist, waste several hours, then go to my first appointment with a pain management doctor. Dayton is quite a drive, and for me to come all the way home only to turn around and come back right after would have been ridiculous. So I spent some time eating lunch, playing on my cell phone, and looking at the clock every two minutes until it was time to see the PM doc. In the meantime it had started to rain. Anyone who has fibromyalgia will tell you that the rain usually makes you hurt worse, and I'm no exception. Plus all the time spent sitting in seats of varying softness and comfort levels had really put my back in severe pain. When it was finally time for my appointment, I was ready. Really, really ready. The nurse spent about an hour taking a full medical history and asking all kinds of questions about my pain. My fibromyalgia is fairly well controlled, but the sciatica from my slipped discs is not, and that was the reason for the visit. My rheumatologist suggested injections to help make me functional again. Anyway, I had included information about my fibromyalgia in my history because I felt it was only right. Fibro has its own set of complications, and if they didn't know about it, that could alter my course of treatment. But I did make sure to tell the nurse that I was there for the sciatica, not the fibro. I waited another 45 minutes for the doctor to see me. When he finally came in, he flipped open my chart, scanned through it, and started talking about my fibromyalgia. He suggested I start taking Lyrica for the pain. I had already discussed this with my rheumatologist, and she had decided against it because it has a high tendency to cause people to gain weight, and I told him that. The next drug he mentioned was Savella. This is the only drug I am allergic to. I had tried it and was hospitalized twice because of rapid heart rate, sky-high blood pressure, and uncontrollable vomiting. It stated this clearly in my chart. It was then that I realized that this guy really didn't give a crap about helping me. Somehow we came around to discussing the fact that my rheumy had suggested WLS, and he gave me a long lecture about how it "wasn't an easy way out" etc. etc. and how I should just basically buckle down and try Weight Watchers. Then he told me that he thought I would be better suited for a different pain management program and that he would refer me, and left the room. Immediately I started to cry. I couldn't help myself. I had spent all day in pain, waiting for this man to help give me some relief, and all he did was lecture me and walk away. I tried to hide my tears from the nurse who came to give me my paperwork, but she could tell I was very upset. I made it out of the office, out the door and to my car before I broke down in uncontrollable sobbing. I texted my boyfriend about what had happened. He texted back some expletives about the doctor, but didn't call me. I was glad he didn't because I was crying too hard to talk anyway. I literally cried the whole 60+ miles home. When I got home, I called my mom right away. She could hear the hurt in my voice and started asking me all kinds of questions. I told her all about the PM doc and my awful experience while she aww-ed and poor baby-ed me until I felt a little better. Then I briefly mentioned the rheumy bringing up bariatric surgery. That set her off. "No. No. No. I'm sorry, the answer is no. You are not doing that." I was a little bit shocked by her reaction. I couldn't handle any more emotional upset, so I quickly got off the phone and went to bed. The next day, I called her again. I gingerly brought up the WLS again, and she explained that she had seen an episode of Dr. Oz about it and that she wouldn't have me doing that. I didn't see the show, but she told me about it. Apparently there were several women on the program who described "the horrors" of surgery. One woman showed a day's worth of food, which I guess was about 3 tablespoons of mushy stuff. There were mentions of huge amounts of excess skin and serious malnutrition. The woman's digestion was so disrupted my the operation that she had to take enzymes for the rest of her life just to digest her food. My mom had been so appalled by the show that she said she would not let me have surgery. I explained to her that I was actually considering it, and that the lap-band did not have all of those issues associated with it; some, but not all. She seemed surprised that I would even think about doing such a thing. "I would think that surgery would be your last option." Well, mom, what do you think it is? Have you not seen me struggle with my weight for all these years? Have you not heard me cry about how uncomfortable I am with my body? Have you not thought about how much pain I am causing myself by basically carrying around another full-grown person with me at all times? And did you not also watch my dad die a slow and miserable death brought about by the same thing? I have since given her a lot of information about the lap-band procedure vs. the other surgical options available. I have shown her how it is safer and equally as effective if used properly. We talked about how, since my stomach will remain intact, my digestion will not be altered nearly as much. She has begun to come around to the idea, but she still has huge reservations. I will be bringing her to my informational seminar in January so she can hear exactly what the surgeon has to say. She was relieved that I will have to do 9 months supervised diet per my insurance company. I think she feels like she has at least that much time to change my mind. In the end, it really is my decision. I am a grown woman and do not need my mom's permission to have the surgery. But it would comfort me greatly to have her blessing. I know she would support me no matter what, but the idea of making such a life-altering decision without her full backing is scary to me. I guess I have nine months or so to change her mind. Thanks, Dr. Oz.

Thank you Zil, I really appreciate the kind words and support.

Recently one of the lovely ladies on the forum suggested using appetizer flatware to eat with, because it is smaller than regular flatware, yet more dignified than eating with baby silverware. I agree, I would not be totally thrilled with having to eat all my meals off of a fork with a cartoon character on it. I combined that idea with another idea from another lovely lady, which was doing a "trial-run" of sorts with an imaginary band. (The people on this forum are so creative and so smart!) So I went out and bought an appetizer set with forks, spoons, plates and bowls, and have been using them to eat with lately. Well, I have been using the forks and spoons. Well, when I have been able to eat, I have used the forks and spoons. I just got over a nasty virus that acted almost exactly like strep throat, and so was on a liquid-and-popsicle diet for over a week out of pure necessity. I know that it's pretty early in the process yet, but I want to make sure that I get used to taking things slowly. In the past, "slow" was not in my vocabulary when it came to food. I would wolf down a plate full of food before my brain could even register it, then go back and get seconds just so I could taste it. Through a slow process and lots of therapy, I started changing my habits and have now gotten to the point where I can eat like a "normal" person for the most part. When I am stressed, I still battle with the urge to eat as much as possible in the shortest amount of time. But I have so many reasons to change, and so changing I am. Slowly, but still. One of the biggest reasons I have to do all this changing is my sweet baby boy. He just turned three in October, and he is a little sponge. Everything we do, he picks it up, whether we think he is paying attention or not. So how does someone like me raise a child who doesn't have a seriously unhealthy relationship with food? I have come to the realization that I have to lead by example and change the relationship I have with food. I have been working with my therapist to try and change my habits, as well as deal with the underlying issues that caused me to form those habits in the first place. I try not to reward him with food or candy, but at the same time I don't make anything off-limits either. Don't get me wrong, I don't let him eat a bag of M&M's right before bedtime, but if he wants a few of them during the day that's fine with me. I also don't push him to finish all the food on his plate, which was a HUGE struggle for me. I was a product of the "clean your plate because there's starving children in Africa" mindset, and I don't want to pass that on to him. We just make sure to tell him that he doesn't have to eat it all, but he can't expect to say he's done with his dinner and then eat a bunch of junk food. So now he eats what he feels comfortable eating, and if he's still hungry later he can have a healthy snack. And now that I am going through the process of being banded, I am telling him about how it's important to stay active and be mindful of what you are eating. I sat him down and had a little talk with him about how our bodies are gifts that God has given us, and how it's important to take care of them. I said that I hadn't realized what a great thing God had done for me, and I didn't take care of my body like I should have. So now God has shown me a path to take that will help me make my body healthy again so that I can play with him and take care of him like I was meant to. I tried to make it as relatable as I could, but I didn't think he was paying attention. Until yesterday, that is. He came up to me while I was sitting on the couch, put his little hands on my belly, and said "Mommy, you going to go see the doctor God showed you and he going to make your belly smaller so you can play with me?" So now I have another thing to add to my list of reasons to have the surgery: I have the responsibility of having a little pair of eyes watching everything I do, and I am responsible for shaping his ideas about his weight and his body and how he takes care of himself. It is a heavy responsibility to bear, but I know that he is worth it.

Congratulations!

I would suggest you go talk to your doctor about it. If it is bad enough to impact your everyday life and doesn't improve with rest, it's serious enough to go to the doctor. You may even want to see a rheumatologist if your primary doc thinks it's appropriate. I hope you find an answer soon, I know how debilitating hip pain can be.

I know how you feel, Lisha. I've got a little more than 200 pounds to go too. I've found that you can't look at it like "Oh, I have so much weight to lose, I'll never make it." That's just self-defeating. You have to make some short-term goals. I've been doing a lot of thinking about this and I've made some for myself, so I'll share. Right now I am at 375, and I am at the very beginning of my process. I have a nine-month physician documented diet before I can even think about being banded. So my first goal is to lose 25 lbs. in that nine months. I don't want to lose too much, in case the insurance company would say "well, then, you don't need surgery!" Then my next goal is to get down under 300. I'm not putting in a time frame because I don't know how it will go for me, since I have medical issues that may impact how fast I can lose and how much exercise I can do. When I get to 299, I will dance my ever-lovin' rear end off, then my next goal is 250. Breaking it up into smaller pieces makes it so much more doable. Then when you get to the 200-250 lost range, you can look back and say "Wow, I remember when I was so discouraged by this, but look at me now! I did it!" I know you can do it. I have faith in you. : )

Good luck! I'll be praying for a quick and easy surgery and a fast recovery for you.

Congratulations!

I can relate. I haven't been banded yet, but have been dealing with emotional eating all my life. I have to say that therapy really has helped. My therapist has taught me cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and it has been incredibly useful. I have learned to ask myself a series of questions before I get something to eat. I have also written them on cards that I stuck on my fridge and cabinet doors. The questions are: Why am I here? What am I feeling? Do I really need to eat right now? What is the worst thing that will happen if I wait 20 minutes? Sometimes it seems kinda silly, but it really does help. I would recommend therapy, but remember that therapists are like any other medical professional in that they all have their own style and you may have to check out a few different ones before you find one who suits you best.

Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

I can't add anything about it being better than other cooking methods, but I found this site about how to do this yourself without the sous vide cooker. http://www.popsci.co...pensive-diy-way I may have to try this myself.

Thanks Bandit. You put that so perfectly. God bless you as well!

Yeah, I'm having similar issues and running Safari. I'll try it with Firefox and post back if it works. (fingers crossed!) Tried it, no dice. All my information is saved, it just doesn't show up on my profile. The only thing that shows up is my age and birthdate. Hopefully they will fix this soon...

I'm sorry if my blog made you worry, Violet. That wasn't my intention. There are complications with any surgery, no matter how "minor" or "non-invasive," and if you google "x surgery complications" I'm sure there are lots of horror stories, but there are also many many positive experiences that we don't hear about because those people are busy living their lives. Please don't let my blog scare you out of doing something if you feel it's the best thing for you. I know people who have had gastric bypass and didn't succeed, too. I think it is a combination of restriction from the band, dedication to a healthy lifestyle, and sometimes a bit of luck that causes people to succeed. I think you will do fine because you realize this. You're already doing so well! I guess the whole point of my blog was just to complain a little about how one television show can influence someone's opinion so strongly.