Alexandra

We just got haricuts this morning, and I'm sad to say it ended in tears for my older dd. We went a little, um, shorter than she wanted. :shuffle Normally I'd let her have all the say, but she didn't really even need a cut, she just wanted one because her sister was getting one. So while she was in the chair the hairdresser and I discussed "long layers" and Gillian didn't say a word. The hairdresser seems not to know what "long" means. Gillian was aghast, and inconsolable for a couple of hours. The before and afters are below. She's over it now, and I think it actually looks really great. She'll be very happy not to have to deal with long hair for the summer.

1. Was your procedure outpatient or did you stay overnight? Outpatient. Surgery at 8:00 a.m., home at 1:00 p.m. 2. Did you have complications related to surgery? No complications. 3. What you were given for at home pain? How many days did you take it? Generic Percocet, I think (Endocet). I didn't take any of it. 4. Pain after surgery for how many days? Next day and for the next three days I was sore, but that was about it. No gas pain to speak of. 5. Degree of pain...10 being your arm was cut off and 1 being a paper cut? 4 down to 2 pretty quickly. 6. Doctor and state where surgery was done? Dr. Alexander Abkin, Morristown, NJ

1. Was your procedure outpatient or did you stay overnight? 2. Did you have complications related to surgery? 3. What you were given for at home pain? How many days did you take it? 4. Pain after surgery for how many days? 5. Degree of pain...10 being your arm was cut off and 1 being a paper cut? 6. Doctor and state where surgery was done?

Actually, that's more of a survey than a poll. I'll create a new thread with these questions.

Even though this sounds like a unreasonable hoop that your insurance is asking you to jump through, I think it makes a lot of sense. You can think of it as practice for the banded life, and if you're not successful at losing weight during this time that's nothing to worry about. The simple act of meeting with your doctor on a monthly or bi-weekly basis to talk about your behavior can really get a patient in the right frame of mind for surgery. I don't know of any way or reason a carrier would simply waive that requirement. You just have to get started, and it will be over before you know it. Six months is nothing.

This really rings true for me, Unsure. This was the song of my early life too. As a result, I've spent all my life feeling deprived and thus somehow entitled to any extra food that was laying around. That's how I got to 340 lbs over time. While it can't cure the mental issues, the band can act as an enforcer of behavioral therapy. It forces you to think about every bite, and just that action can really make a difference in your mind if you are willing to let it. While you are working on the mental issues with therapy, the band gives you the means to actually lose weight and SEE what a difference eating differently can make. And that's a big impetus to continue working on the mindgame. Good luck with everything, and keep asking questions!

Laurend's right, Zully. "Exclusions" are usually the province of the employer, not the insurance carrier. If your employer excludes bariatric surgery on one of its policies, it's likely an across-the-board thing.

Carlene makes a good point. It's always wise to be mindful of this. Most weddings/receptions I've been to in the last several years have been at someone's home, so it's not an issue. But yes, of course if it's a church/hall event sending the gift elsewhere makes a lot of sense. But again, why should it be the bride's mother packing up gifts and taking them somewhere? IMO any defined roles like this are utterly outdated. Whatever works, works.

Hi Dave, If your doctor does fills under fluoroscope, that IS an x-ray. He'll be able to see the position of your band and the speed with which Fluid passes through the stoma. This is one of the major reasons doctors who use fluoroscopy do so. Each fill is also a band checkup. But unless you are having symptoms, there's no point in having a fluoroscope test "just because." It's expensive, for one thing, and would be a waste of resources. If you want to foot the bill you might be able to arrange one, but I'm sure your doctor would prefer that you try not to worry.

It's been removed for the time being, since it seemed to be leading to problems.

Well, there's no way to police the comments, in the same way we can't police private messages. No one knows what's in them except the sender and the recipient. But what I'm describing removes the positive/negative aspect to it--there's no "I approve/disagree" button, just a place to leave a comment. I don't even know if that's possible, and now I see the whole thing has been disabled. So this discussion is now moot. Thanks anyway!

On another board I visit the rep function is only positive--or, I guess, neutral. It's not a way of getting "points," just a way that people can leave little comments for one another. Personally, I like that part, because it's just a private message one sends to another that can lighten a day, and it's a lot easier than sending a PM. I know it's something I use a lot because I don't like to post messages just to say "I agree with so-and-so." Getting those messages is great; it's always nice to hear that someone wants to respond to what you have said, even if no one else knows it. That list of comments is always there, too; it's not like PMs which have to be opened one by one to be read, and need to be managed since there's limited space for them. So if we could change the functionality to something like that, how would y'all feel about it?

Lynne, my heart goes out to you and your family. You're in my thoughts.

Kat, thank you so much, that's really helpful and reassuring information. This boy has a meduloblastoma. Sigh... Kat, thank you. Tonight I will be able to sleep. :hug:

Thank you everyone for your thoughts. I know the family is well-supported in their time of trial. The news this morning is even worse. Today the family saw an oncologist in New York, who says now that the cancer is so advanced the child has weeks, not months, to live. It turns out that though he was cancer-free three months ago, the tumors returned so aggressively that there is nothing to be done. If there is any blessing to be found, it is that his brother is quite young yet (not older, as I thought), and will not remember this grief. The family will not have to somehow comfort a child who is losing a sibling on top of trying to face this tragedy themselves. My friend was just gray this morning when he came in, and he didn't stay long. I can't even imagine what his sister is going through. We can all hold the fervent hope is that the child isn't in pain, and passes with peace and love all around him.

:pound: :pound:

Oh Lapdancer, that dress is absolutely STUNNING! drool, drool...

Couples shower means couples gifts. When I had a shower it was also a couples shower. That was done intentionally because I explicitly did NOT want lingerie or things that were for me alone. The party was to commemorate the creation of a family and household, not my deflowering and conversion into household help. Some of our favorite gifts were: quality wooden windchimes; a carved birdhouse that had our last name painted on it; a great shower massage-type showerhead; throw blankets and floor pillows.

Absolutely. I also just read that up until the advent of these medicines, because so many women died in childbirth the average life expectancy was only in the 30s, which is where it had been for all of human history. Only after childbirth was made safe did overall life expectancy start to rise to modern standards.

A co-worker of mine has a 4 y.o. nephew who was treated for brain cancer most of last year. He had surgery, chemo, and radiation and as far as we in the office heard was doing well. I just got an e-mail from the co-worker letting me know his nephew's cancer has returned, and the doctors say it's progressed to the point where he has only 2-3 months to live. My heart is just broken in two for this family. I can't imagine. :think

If no one has given you rep, there won't be anything to see. I just "repped" you so you should be able to see that. Click on your User CP and scroll all the way down to the bottom of the page.

I was invited to a bridal shower for a perfect stranger once, and didn't feel the slightest bit obligated to do anything. In the OP scenario, my decision would be based on how close I was to the groom. Not having met the bride is no reason to sincerely give them heartfelt good wishes if the groom is someone I care about. But I don't buy into gift-giving etiquette in general. I give gifts when I am moved to do so, not because of artificial rules of etiquette. And I'm not a big user of registries, unless I don't know the people well. A mere invitation to a shower is no reason to feel obligated to buy a gift if you don't intend to go. In this case I'd probably blow off the shower altogether (I hate showers, in general), and go to the wedding, gift in hand.

I'm going to pipe up and tell you that OF COURSE it can be done! But YOU are the one who is going to have to do it. If you really want to lose 50 lbs in that time there's no reason in the world you can't. In early 1990, I went on Opti-Fast and lost 75 lbs in three months. (I don't recommend that, btw.) Toward the end of that time I was a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding, and was having the dress made to fit. Each time I went back for another fitting, I'd lost another size! Drove the poor woman crazy. So my advice would have been to not order the dress until later. I got married that same year and bought something absolutely beautiful off the rack in a smaller size than I'd expected. My lesson with the bridemaid dress taught me to leave the tailoring alone. :rolleyes

Laurend, I don't think you can, in detail. On another board I'm on the green boxes multiply as people's reputation grows. If someone's rep is bad rather than good, on balance, the boxes are a different color. Wheetsin, thank you SO MUCH for doing this! I'm making this thread sticky.

Hi Lauren, This is something we all go through from time to time. After two years, weight-loss-fatigue can set in. Be kind to yourself! You've done a wonderful job and your band is still there to support you when you are ready to use it. Your new lifestyle isn't a diet to be on temporarily, it's a permanent lifestyle change. Six pounds isn't the end of the world but it is attention-getting. Remember where you came from--maybe it's time to put a "before" picture on the fridge? Every time you allow you band to tell you that you are NOT hungry it is a victory and another step on the road to better health. Don't obsess about 35 lbs to go, think about where you have come from and all the pounds you've already dropped. Come to the support groups, too. They really help! Second and last Wednesdays of each month. See you there!