SKCUNNINGHAM

I too am a Christian. Your question reminds me of a joke ( I am not making light of your question - there is a point to the joke.) It is not my intent to offend anyone's faith here.
A man lived in a house close to the river. The river was swollen with flood waters; the waters were still rising. Authorities were telling people to evacuate. The man refused to go, saying he was a Christian and God would provide for him. As the waters were rising and he was forced to go to the second floor of his house to get away from the flood waters, friends in a small boat came by to rescue him. He refused to go, saying again he was a Christian and God would provide. The waters continued to rise, and the man was forced to go onto his roof. A police yatch came by and told the man to get in the boat - they would take him to safety. Again, he said the same thing and the police reluctantly left him on his roof. A little later, a rescue helicopter hovered over him, dropping the ladder down so he could climb on - only the very highest part of his roof was still out of Water. And again - he refused to go - saying God would provide. Well - the man drowned. He went to Heaven, and stood before St. Peter at the gate. He wasn't very happy - and St. Peter asked what was bothering him. He told St. Peter he was surprised he had drowned - he had expected God to save him. St. Peter said to him "Who do you think sent the two boats and the helicopter?"
I view the sleeve as my personal ladder coming down from the helicopter. Dr. Nick did the surgery - but the man upstairs definately played a major role in my success with the sleeve.

I agree with your premise that we are more than stories about our struggles with weight. Here's mine.
I am a 55 year old married career woman. I have been married for almost 31 years (next week). My husband and I own a marina and resort with two business partners on a lake about 75 miles east of Dallas Texas. We have owned the business for about 16 years. I do not take an active part in running the business, I have always kept my "day job" as an engineer and manager in corporate America.
Just yesterday, I took an early retirement with my company. I currently looking for another position and will be doing this full time starting next week. But since I am "retired" with health benefits, I now have the flexibility to maybe select short term contract positions rather than another permanent position. It is nice to be interviewing as a thin person, rather than someone who is morbidly obese.
I am a mother of one grown son and grandmom to two delighful little girls. I enjoy reading - both fiction and non-fiction and antiquing - both buying and reading about different types of antiques. I am addicted to home design magazines and food TV on the satellite.

I agree with your premise that we are more than stories about our struggles with weight. Here's mine.
I am a 55 year old married career woman. I have been married for almost 31 years (next week). My husband and I own a marina and resort with two business partners on a lake about 75 miles east of Dallas Texas. We have owned the business for about 16 years. I do not take an active part in running the business, I have always kept my "day job" as an engineer and manager in corporate America.
Just yesterday, I took an early retirement with my company. I currently looking for another position and will be doing this full time starting next week. But since I am "retired" with health benefits, I now have the flexibility to maybe select short term contract positions rather than another permanent position. It is nice to be interviewing as a thin person, rather than someone who is morbidly obese.
I am a mother of one grown son and grandmom to two delighful little girls. I enjoy reading - both fiction and non-fiction and antiquing - both buying and reading about different types of antiques. I am addicted to home design magazines and food TV on the satellite.

Being WAY smaller than my husband's ex-wife (saw her at a family party). :-) (evil smile)

I'm from Lake Tawakoni - aoubt 70 miles east of Dallas. Just passed my 3 months surgiverary and am down 54 pounds.

If you go to www.surgery.com, it will tell you the following (I got this from typing "deaths from sleeve gastrectomy" into my search engine)
The American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery lists the complication rate in vertical sleeve gastrectomy to be relatively low, even among patients considered to be at high risk. Cumulatively the overall mortality (death) from vertical sleeve gastrectomy is 0.39 percent—lower than with traditional bariatric surgeries. (last updated 11/24/2009)

From an article on www.gastricbypassfacts.com, here is a extract from "How Does the Sleeve Gastrectomy Work?"

The risks and complications of the sleeve gastrectomy:As with all forms of weight loss surgery, the vertical gastrectomy does carry risk and these will clearly vary from one patient to the next and must be discussed with your physician. Complications might include:

Gastric leakage and fistula 1.0% Deep vein thrombosis 0.5% Non-fatal pulmonary embolus 0.5% Post-operative bleeding 0.5% Splenectomy 0.5% Acute respiratory distress 0.25% Pneumonia 0.2% Death 0.25% http://healthengine.com.au/article/sleeve-gastrectomy.html
This article quotes " The mortality rate in gastric sleeve is 1:500 and it lies between the gastric band, which is the safest, and the laparoscopic gastric bypass, which carries the highest risk."
So the first source says 3.9 patients out of 1000, the second source says 2.5 patients out of 1000 and the third says 2 out of 1000. So I would feel comfortable (based on these 3 sources) saying the death rate is somewhere between 2 and 4 per 1000.
To contrast that - imagine 1000 people walking around that are your height and weight - with your exact health problems. How many of them would die in the next year from their health problems?
From something I was reading this week on another forum - surgeons who perform 100 or more sleeves per year have lower risk rates. Hospitals that perform over 150 sleeves per year have lower risk rates.
If you are considering a surgeon, ask how many procedures he/she has performed in a year, and how many he/she has performed in total. Then ask the same two questions about how many of his patients died. This will give you an idea where your surgeon is versus the norms. Also ask about the hospital you will have the surgery performed in - how many procedures do they do a year?
Any surgery is scary and has risks. You can't go through life avoiding all risks. For me - the risk of dying of heart problems from NOT DOING this surgery and staying obese was much higher than the risks from the surgery. This surgery was the right decision for me. I wish you good luck on making your decision.

If you go to www.surgery.com, it will tell you the following (I got this from typing "deaths from sleeve gastrectomy" into my search engine)
The American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery lists the complication rate in vertical sleeve gastrectomy to be relatively low, even among patients considered to be at high risk. Cumulatively the overall mortality (death) from vertical sleeve gastrectomy is 0.39 percent—lower than with traditional bariatric surgeries. (last updated 11/24/2009)

From an article on www.gastricbypassfacts.com, here is a extract from "How Does the Sleeve Gastrectomy Work?"

The risks and complications of the sleeve gastrectomy:As with all forms of weight loss surgery, the vertical gastrectomy does carry risk and these will clearly vary from one patient to the next and must be discussed with your physician. Complications might include:

Gastric leakage and fistula 1.0% Deep vein thrombosis 0.5% Non-fatal pulmonary embolus 0.5% Post-operative bleeding 0.5% Splenectomy 0.5% Acute respiratory distress 0.25% Pneumonia 0.2% Death 0.25% http://healthengine.com.au/article/sleeve-gastrectomy.html
This article quotes " The mortality rate in gastric sleeve is 1:500 and it lies between the gastric band, which is the safest, and the laparoscopic gastric bypass, which carries the highest risk."
So the first source says 3.9 patients out of 1000, the second source says 2.5 patients out of 1000 and the third says 2 out of 1000. So I would feel comfortable (based on these 3 sources) saying the death rate is somewhere between 2 and 4 per 1000.
To contrast that - imagine 1000 people walking around that are your height and weight - with your exact health problems. How many of them would die in the next year from their health problems?
From something I was reading this week on another forum - surgeons who perform 100 or more sleeves per year have lower risk rates. Hospitals that perform over 150 sleeves per year have lower risk rates.
If you are considering a surgeon, ask how many procedures he/she has performed in a year, and how many he/she has performed in total. Then ask the same two questions about how many of his patients died. This will give you an idea where your surgeon is versus the norms. Also ask about the hospital you will have the surgery performed in - how many procedures do they do a year?
Any surgery is scary and has risks. You can't go through life avoiding all risks. For me - the risk of dying of heart problems from NOT DOING this surgery and staying obese was much higher than the risks from the surgery. This surgery was the right decision for me. I wish you good luck on making your decision.

If you go to www.surgery.com, it will tell you the following (I got this from typing "deaths from sleeve gastrectomy" into my search engine)
The American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery lists the complication rate in vertical sleeve gastrectomy to be relatively low, even among patients considered to be at high risk. Cumulatively the overall mortality (death) from vertical sleeve gastrectomy is 0.39 percent—lower than with traditional bariatric surgeries. (last updated 11/24/2009)

From an article on www.gastricbypassfacts.com, here is a extract from "How Does the Sleeve Gastrectomy Work?"

The risks and complications of the sleeve gastrectomy:As with all forms of weight loss surgery, the vertical gastrectomy does carry risk and these will clearly vary from one patient to the next and must be discussed with your physician. Complications might include:

Gastric leakage and fistula 1.0% Deep vein thrombosis 0.5% Non-fatal pulmonary embolus 0.5% Post-operative bleeding 0.5% Splenectomy 0.5% Acute respiratory distress 0.25% Pneumonia 0.2% Death 0.25% http://healthengine.com.au/article/sleeve-gastrectomy.html
This article quotes " The mortality rate in gastric sleeve is 1:500 and it lies between the gastric band, which is the safest, and the laparoscopic gastric bypass, which carries the highest risk."
So the first source says 3.9 patients out of 1000, the second source says 2.5 patients out of 1000 and the third says 2 out of 1000. So I would feel comfortable (based on these 3 sources) saying the death rate is somewhere between 2 and 4 per 1000.
To contrast that - imagine 1000 people walking around that are your height and weight - with your exact health problems. How many of them would die in the next year from their health problems?
From something I was reading this week on another forum - surgeons who perform 100 or more sleeves per year have lower risk rates. Hospitals that perform over 150 sleeves per year have lower risk rates.
If you are considering a surgeon, ask how many procedures he/she has performed in a year, and how many he/she has performed in total. Then ask the same two questions about how many of his patients died. This will give you an idea where your surgeon is versus the norms. Also ask about the hospital you will have the surgery performed in - how many procedures do they do a year?
Any surgery is scary and has risks. You can't go through life avoiding all risks. For me - the risk of dying of heart problems from NOT DOING this surgery and staying obese was much higher than the risks from the surgery. This surgery was the right decision for me. I wish you good luck on making your decision.

I agree with your premise that we are more than stories about our struggles with weight. Here's mine.
I am a 55 year old married career woman. I have been married for almost 31 years (next week). My husband and I own a marina and resort with two business partners on a lake about 75 miles east of Dallas Texas. We have owned the business for about 16 years. I do not take an active part in running the business, I have always kept my "day job" as an engineer and manager in corporate America.
Just yesterday, I took an early retirement with my company. I currently looking for another position and will be doing this full time starting next week. But since I am "retired" with health benefits, I now have the flexibility to maybe select short term contract positions rather than another permanent position. It is nice to be interviewing as a thin person, rather than someone who is morbidly obese.
I am a mother of one grown son and grandmom to two delighful little girls. I enjoy reading - both fiction and non-fiction and antiquing - both buying and reading about different types of antiques. I am addicted to home design magazines and food TV on the satellite.

WOW! This is great results. Congratulations on getting to enjoy being a smaller, healthier you!
Enjoy!

The first Success Habit Principle TM identified in the Success Habits of Weight-Loss Surgery Patients by Colleen Cook is: PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY. I recognize that I alone am responsible for my success and failures. This is the most important factor contributing to optimum weight loss and long-term weight control.

If each of us was asked the question, “Who is responsible for your success?”, each of us would probably answer “I am”. The religious among us would also likely give credit to God’s help in achieving success. The study that was done on the Success Habits identified that the most successful people at maintaining their WLS weight loss long term had a very strong sense of personal accountability that exhibited itself in some key behaviors.

They developed an indicator that identified WHAT they were doing regularly that was helping them stay in control and remain accountable for their weight every day.

You must be personally accountable for the decisions you have made, take responsibility for your choices, and be honest with yourself. Ms. Cook believes (and I agree) that we are where we are because we have made the choices to be so. Our lives must be serving us in some way (whether we are fat or thin at the point you are reading this), or we would already have made changes. Take responsibility for who you are, why you are and where you are right now and take responsibility for how you arrived there.

Don’t wait for someone else to have to change for you to achieve your goal of long-term weight control. You alone are responsible for this.

Long term weight control is about managing the ratio of Calories-In versus Calories Out. If you eat more than you expend, you gain weight. If you eat less than you expend, you lose. The sleeve is an outstanding tool to help us control the amount we eat (if we use it correctly). You alone are responsible for what you eat, when you eat, and how much you eat.

We are also responsible for the other side of the equation – I alone am responsible for what exercises I do, how often and how I manage making exercise a part of my life.

Successful people do those things which unsuccessful people are not willing to do.


(The above is excerpted from the book with a few minor changes by me)

So what was the great learning I had from this? Bye-bye blaming anyone but myself. Good-bye to any excuses that don’t start with the word “I” at the front. I thought back to the FOUR OTHER TIMES I have lost around 100 pounds and failed to make it past two years in maintaining – before I would gain it all plus more, back.

I identified how I had framed my failures to myself – who or what I had blamed on those failures. Then I rephrased them in my mind, taking accountability for my actions.

Rather than go through all four failures, I’ll just do the last one.
I lost 103 pounds through hypnosis, diet and exercise. I was well on the way to celebrating my one year at goal mark when I had a person in my family close to me die suddenly, I changed jobs to one that required me to travel out of state 80% of the time and didn’t give me the time to exercise, was on an expense account living out of hotels, and forgot to take my hypnosis material with me for a couple of weeks. I went up 3 to four sizes by the time the first year in the new job was over – from a 10 to a 16-18.

So here is the rephrased version of what happened, taking full accountability for my actions.

After the sudden death of my stepfather, I decided life was too short to worry about monitoring everything I ate. I told myself if he could die like that, what was the point.
I didn’t make time to exercise, even though every hotel I stayed in had a gym.
Consoling myself with food was much more important to me than the pleasure I got after working out.
I chose to quit listening to the hypnosis CD’s, even though I knew they could have helped me get back on track. I felt guilty listening to them while I was overeating and not exercising, so I chose to “forget” to take them on a trip.


Here is an accountable version of where I am now.
I am almost at my initial goal weight, and I am pretty content with where I am.
I have been letting the outside stresses of looking for work (I recently left my employer) distract me from my goal of getting rid of the 10 pounds that stand between me and reaching my goal. This stops TODAY.
Whether I find a job that is commensurate with my education and skills quickly, or whether I have to take a job far below my capabilities, I will practice the Six Success Habit Principles. TM My employmentsituation has NO BEARING on my attaining or maintaining my goal weight.
I understand that I must embrace exercise as a life long part of my life. Diet alone will not do it for me.


So this is the first thread for the first habit. I will put up two more threads in the near future that are also on this habit. Once will be on building new “good” habits to replace old “bad” habits. The other will be on goal setting. Both skills are really necessary for mastering this accountability thing.

Hope this helps. Good Luck.
Sharon

I agree with your premise that we are more than stories about our struggles with weight. Here's mine.
I am a 55 year old married career woman. I have been married for almost 31 years (next week). My husband and I own a marina and resort with two business partners on a lake about 75 miles east of Dallas Texas. We have owned the business for about 16 years. I do not take an active part in running the business, I have always kept my "day job" as an engineer and manager in corporate America.
Just yesterday, I took an early retirement with my company. I currently looking for another position and will be doing this full time starting next week. But since I am "retired" with health benefits, I now have the flexibility to maybe select short term contract positions rather than another permanent position. It is nice to be interviewing as a thin person, rather than someone who is morbidly obese.
I am a mother of one grown son and grandmom to two delighful little girls. I enjoy reading - both fiction and non-fiction and antiquing - both buying and reading about different types of antiques. I am addicted to home design magazines and food TV on the satellite.

If you go to www.surgery.com, it will tell you the following (I got this from typing "deaths from sleeve gastrectomy" into my search engine)
The American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery lists the complication rate in vertical sleeve gastrectomy to be relatively low, even among patients considered to be at high risk. Cumulatively the overall mortality (death) from vertical sleeve gastrectomy is 0.39 percent—lower than with traditional bariatric surgeries. (last updated 11/24/2009)

From an article on www.gastricbypassfacts.com, here is a extract from "How Does the Sleeve Gastrectomy Work?"

The risks and complications of the sleeve gastrectomy:As with all forms of weight loss surgery, the vertical gastrectomy does carry risk and these will clearly vary from one patient to the next and must be discussed with your physician. Complications might include:

Gastric leakage and fistula 1.0% Deep vein thrombosis 0.5% Non-fatal pulmonary embolus 0.5% Post-operative bleeding 0.5% Splenectomy 0.5% Acute respiratory distress 0.25% Pneumonia 0.2% Death 0.25% http://healthengine.com.au/article/sleeve-gastrectomy.html
This article quotes " The mortality rate in gastric sleeve is 1:500 and it lies between the gastric band, which is the safest, and the laparoscopic gastric bypass, which carries the highest risk."
So the first source says 3.9 patients out of 1000, the second source says 2.5 patients out of 1000 and the third says 2 out of 1000. So I would feel comfortable (based on these 3 sources) saying the death rate is somewhere between 2 and 4 per 1000.
To contrast that - imagine 1000 people walking around that are your height and weight - with your exact health problems. How many of them would die in the next year from their health problems?
From something I was reading this week on another forum - surgeons who perform 100 or more sleeves per year have lower risk rates. Hospitals that perform over 150 sleeves per year have lower risk rates.
If you are considering a surgeon, ask how many procedures he/she has performed in a year, and how many he/she has performed in total. Then ask the same two questions about how many of his patients died. This will give you an idea where your surgeon is versus the norms. Also ask about the hospital you will have the surgery performed in - how many procedures do they do a year?
Any surgery is scary and has risks. You can't go through life avoiding all risks. For me - the risk of dying of heart problems from NOT DOING this surgery and staying obese was much higher than the risks from the surgery. This surgery was the right decision for me. I wish you good luck on making your decision.

I agree with your premise that we are more than stories about our struggles with weight. Here's mine.
I am a 55 year old married career woman. I have been married for almost 31 years (next week). My husband and I own a marina and resort with two business partners on a lake about 75 miles east of Dallas Texas. We have owned the business for about 16 years. I do not take an active part in running the business, I have always kept my "day job" as an engineer and manager in corporate America.
Just yesterday, I took an early retirement with my company. I currently looking for another position and will be doing this full time starting next week. But since I am "retired" with health benefits, I now have the flexibility to maybe select short term contract positions rather than another permanent position. It is nice to be interviewing as a thin person, rather than someone who is morbidly obese.
I am a mother of one grown son and grandmom to two delighful little girls. I enjoy reading - both fiction and non-fiction and antiquing - both buying and reading about different types of antiques. I am addicted to home design magazines and food TV on the satellite.

I agree with your premise that we are more than stories about our struggles with weight. Here's mine.
I am a 55 year old married career woman. I have been married for almost 31 years (next week). My husband and I own a marina and resort with two business partners on a lake about 75 miles east of Dallas Texas. We have owned the business for about 16 years. I do not take an active part in running the business, I have always kept my "day job" as an engineer and manager in corporate America.
Just yesterday, I took an early retirement with my company. I currently looking for another position and will be doing this full time starting next week. But since I am "retired" with health benefits, I now have the flexibility to maybe select short term contract positions rather than another permanent position. It is nice to be interviewing as a thin person, rather than someone who is morbidly obese.
I am a mother of one grown son and grandmom to two delighful little girls. I enjoy reading - both fiction and non-fiction and antiquing - both buying and reading about different types of antiques. I am addicted to home design magazines and food TV on the satellite.

I agree with your premise that we are more than stories about our struggles with weight. Here's mine.
I am a 55 year old married career woman. I have been married for almost 31 years (next week). My husband and I own a marina and resort with two business partners on a lake about 75 miles east of Dallas Texas. We have owned the business for about 16 years. I do not take an active part in running the business, I have always kept my "day job" as an engineer and manager in corporate America.
Just yesterday, I took an early retirement with my company. I currently looking for another position and will be doing this full time starting next week. But since I am "retired" with health benefits, I now have the flexibility to maybe select short term contract positions rather than another permanent position. It is nice to be interviewing as a thin person, rather than someone who is morbidly obese.
I am a mother of one grown son and grandmom to two delighful little girls. I enjoy reading - both fiction and non-fiction and antiquing - both buying and reading about different types of antiques. I am addicted to home design magazines and food TV on the satellite.

I agree with your premise that we are more than stories about our struggles with weight. Here's mine.
I am a 55 year old married career woman. I have been married for almost 31 years (next week). My husband and I own a marina and resort with two business partners on a lake about 75 miles east of Dallas Texas. We have owned the business for about 16 years. I do not take an active part in running the business, I have always kept my "day job" as an engineer and manager in corporate America.
Just yesterday, I took an early retirement with my company. I currently looking for another position and will be doing this full time starting next week. But since I am "retired" with health benefits, I now have the flexibility to maybe select short term contract positions rather than another permanent position. It is nice to be interviewing as a thin person, rather than someone who is morbidly obese.
I am a mother of one grown son and grandmom to two delighful little girls. I enjoy reading - both fiction and non-fiction and antiquing - both buying and reading about different types of antiques. I am addicted to home design magazines and food TV on the satellite.

LMD - this is an outstanding post - thank you so much.
I would add:
DO: Keep a food diary of what you eat and drink. This is a great learning tool as to which foods have what amounts of fat, Protein and carbs that add up to your daily intake goals. There are many ways to diary your food - from old fashioned pen and notebook to many options via smartphone apps. Keeping one is the important thing - however is right for you. I use mine now to look back for meal ideas when I hit a blank as to what to prepare for a day or a week.
DO: Realize this is not a diet to be followed for a while then set aside. This is a permanent lifestyle change. Yes, the amount of food you eat will increase as time passes, but your relationship with food will be forever altered. How you Celebrate your joys, successes and holidays will be different. How you mourn your sorrows will be different. Some people need outside help to get through the sometimes overwhelming mental changes this process brings. If you need help with this part of the deal- reach out and get it.
Thanks again LMD - you are awe-inspiring.

I pretty much do what MeginNOLA does. Some places that I regular eat or get food from:
Mexican - fajita meat cooked in onion and tomatoes (different places call this dish different things) and it comes with steamed zucinni at my favorite place. An order is 2 or 3 meals for me.
Chinese - chicken and veggies or shrimp and veggies - no rice
or Hot and Sour Soup with no crunchy yummies for the top.
chicken Wing place - I get the naked wings or naked tenders
Cracker Barrel - I get the roast beef or the meat loaf with green Beans and carrots. This lasts me 2 meals now.
I have always considered a restaurant menu a list of suggestions. I typically read the menu thinking "protein" and "veggies" and then order what I want based on what they have. If I want a baked chicken breast with sliced tomatoes, I order it that way - even if it isn't listed on the menu in that form. This works best with full service places, but some other restaurants are accomidating. I can sometimes be the customer from H**l, but I was the same way before the sleeve. I sometimes take the meat from one "suggestion", the veg from another and the sauce from a third. If they serve it to me willingly and graciously, I overtip like crazy. If they choose to not accomodate me, they don't get my business a second time.

My husband met me when I was a 17 1/2 year old high school senior - taking college calculus because my high school didn't offer the course. We married when I was 24. We became aquaintences, then friends, and then fell in love. We were apart for almost 3 of the 6 years we knew each other - he took a foreign assignment after college graduation, then we got back together and got married.
Many years have passed - we have weathered many marital crises, buried loved ones, raised a child, gotten and lost jobs, welcomed grandchildren, sold a much loved home, started and ran a business (with business partners) together for the last 17 years. Throughout this time my weight has gone up and down from a low of 117 (at 31) to a high of 265 (September before surgery). I have lost 100 pounds and regained them (and more) three times - not counting my WLS loss - WHICH I AM NOT GOING TO REGAIN.
We certainly don't have a perfect relationship, but we have a very good and loving relationship. He and I put up with each others faults and are forgiving of them. He has been a rock through this post-surgery year. I feel much closer to him now than I did before because I am letting myself feel more than I did before. Before surgery, I was SO UNHAPPY WITH MYSELF that I shut myself off from a lot of my feelings and just ate myself numb. Now, I let myself feel - happy, sad, mad - the whole gamut of normal feelings. I realize I am still very much in love with my husband.
Sex is a lot more fun now too. Being a hundred pounds lighter makes lots of things possible that had not been possible for a long time. I am not as tired at night, since I am not hauling a hundred pounds of blubber around with me all day long. SInce I am exercising more, that also increases my sex drive. I am not so self conscious about how I look (either in sexy lingerie or in skin) - so that improves things in the bedroom, too.
I think if you have a good, healthy relationship with your SO, it can (and probably will) get better. If you have a bad unhealthy relationship with an SO, statistics say the relationship has a strong probability of not making it.
If one of the things you are going to "fix" by losing weight is one of the reasons you and your SO are together in the first place, you may be in for some serious realtionship trouble. Here are some things that can cause problems.

If you are together because one or the other of you think "I have to be with this person because no one else will love me" the dramatic weight loss is going to problematic - because the underlying assuption will be challenged when other people start noticing how good you look.
If you are together because you abused food together - you have stopped - he has not - that is going to be a problem
If you are together and you had different "drugs of choice" - well you have given up your abusive relationship with food - if he is still abusing alcohol or some other subtance - this can be a real source of problems
If because of lack of self-esteem, you gave up a lot of control or power to your husband in your relationship, and with your increase in self -esteem as you lose weight you try to "reclaim" that power or control in the relationship, that can cause problems
If your significant other likes you better as a "big" woman rather than a normal or thin woman, you are going to have relationship problems
If your significant other is not willing to change the way you live your life and not have every celebration and every moment of every day be centered around food, you may have relationship problems
If because of lack of self-esteem or other personal issues, you put up with physical abuse in your relationship, as you lose weight, you may get the courage to no longer put up with the abuse. (YEA for you if this is your situation!)

Sometimes, leaving a relationship that is not healthy for you is the best choice you can make.
Best of luck with you and your weight loss journey, and in your relationship with your SO. I hope it a loving and supportive one.
Sharon

Being content with eating one small plate of food at each of the holiday celebrations, while all those around me ate to the point they were miserable,
Being able to be picky when trying on clothes. Even if something fits, if it isn't flattering, not buying it - instead of buying anything (or the one thing) that halfway fits you at all,
Getting to pick from a variety of pretty underwear styles - instead of the granny pants styles.
Being able to stand on one foot and raise the other one off of the floor while shaving my legs in the shower.
Having my husband put his arm around my waist and move me in front of him in the family pictures this year (instead of me hiding half behind him)
<P> </P>

Being WAY smaller than my husband's ex-wife (saw her at a family party). :-) (evil smile)

Being content with eating one small plate of food at each of the holiday celebrations, while all those around me ate to the point they were miserable,
Being able to be picky when trying on clothes. Even if something fits, if it isn't flattering, not buying it - instead of buying anything (or the one thing) that halfway fits you at all,
Getting to pick from a variety of pretty underwear styles - instead of the granny pants styles.
Being able to stand on one foot and raise the other one off of the floor while shaving my legs in the shower.
Having my husband put his arm around my waist and move me in front of him in the family pictures this year (instead of me hiding half behind him)
<P> </P>

Being content with eating one small plate of food at each of the holiday celebrations, while all those around me ate to the point they were miserable,
Being able to be picky when trying on clothes. Even if something fits, if it isn't flattering, not buying it - instead of buying anything (or the one thing) that halfway fits you at all,
Getting to pick from a variety of pretty underwear styles - instead of the granny pants styles.
Being able to stand on one foot and raise the other one off of the floor while shaving my legs in the shower.
Having my husband put his arm around my waist and move me in front of him in the family pictures this year (instead of me hiding half behind him)
<P> </P>

Being WAY smaller than my husband's ex-wife (saw her at a family party). :-) (evil smile)