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About RedheadGirl

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  1. RedheadGirl

    Divorce, the lapband, and the anxiety diet

    I had my lap band surgery and got a divorce in the same month. So it's not really after losing weight that I got my divorce but I did make some major changes in the same month. I happen to also turn 34 that month. It was a big change. I divorced my husband who was in the past physically abusive up until I was pregnant with our son and then he was mentally, emotionally, spiritually etc...etc.. in everyway possible abusive! Especiallly controlling. I finally picked myself up from trying to take my own life from all the abuse and decided I was worth more and needed to be treated better. After I left him I had horrible anxiety and I couldn't eat. I would feel so sick and everything went right through me from the stress. I have noticed in the past 4 months since my surgery that I still try and turn to food and I have to mentally try and stop myself. I have learned how to eat around the band the bad thing is that my favorite type of binge food goes down easily. I want to type more but I'll have to get back to you in here. Have to take care of my son!
  2. RedheadGirl

    The End of Summer Challenge

    I forgot to add my weight the last couple weeks. First week I got to 408, then this past week I got to 406.
  3. I just had my first fill this morning and I got 4.35 cc's. My band can hold 12 cc's. Hopefully it's enough restriction for me! I wish I got 5.5!
  4. RedheadGirl

    Eating boredom!

    Are you on any type of liquids or mushies? When you say you can eat anything are you eating regular foods already? I was on mushie type foods for a couple weeks and I'm now 4 weeks post op and can also eat whatever I want. Now it doesn't even take me long to eat. I'm eating and feeling like I was before my surgery. If you are restricted to the amount of food you take in I would try and do the Protein drinks. I don't have an amount restriction so I have to try hard to NOT overeat. Good luck.
  5. RedheadGirl

    The End of Summer Challenge

    Name, real or screen~ Heather Age~34 Weight on July 29th/August 1st~ 411 Goal Weight for August 29th~ 390 Exercise Goal for August~ Walk or do leslie at home 3 x a week Dietary Goal for August~ Just because I can eat, doesn't mean I should! Personal Goal for August~ Make it to church each Sunday Date Banded~ June 28th 2011 Total Weight Loss Since Banding~ 18 lbs with pre-op diet, 17 lbs after banding but gained back 6. So 30 total right now. I'm 4 weeks post-op. First fill Aug. 9th...!!! Yay!!! Currently have NO restriction.
  6. You guys are amazing. I pretty much have isolated myself this past week with everything going on and haven't even been on the boards. I feel like I don't have a band. I am eating EXACTLY like I used too. Honest, I can down any food I want with no restriction. I'm overeating. I have been eating candy and chips and fast food etc... I don't want too... however I feel like because I "can" I should. I get my first fill on Aug. 9th. I can't wait. I'm hoping it will bring me back to how I was during week one with feeling the band actually in me. The only thing different from before surgery to now is I'm not drinking diet coke . I'm eating large meals and supporting my sorry 430 lb body. I'm guessing I'm back to 430...haven't weighed. Every time I try and eat the small servings that everyone else is eating I am so hungry. It does nothing for me. I'm wondering if I should just do some type of diet ? I am SOO sick of diets though. I'm just so disapointed that I'm one of the few that can eat whatever and however much I want. I just feel like it's not fair. I don't understand. It's still been a bad week and I'm really trying hard to hang in there. I just wish my body would prevent me from eating to much. I did this surgery and paid out of pocket 6200.00 bucks so I could finally lose weight. Thankyou SOOO much for every single comment on here! I took in every single word. <3
  7. Thankyou for the sympathy. It is hard. I did want it, BUT only because he wouldn't stop being abusive. I figured I might as well be honest and the other part of all this is it hurts because as he is looking like such a great guy and treating all these other girls so good he was abusive to me. I hate that I had to leave him and he is charming every other girl. So while he is being a social dating butterfly I sit at home alone after surgery and eat. Just a bad night... thanks for listening. I'll try again tomorrow.
  8. I can't stand the low carb diets. For one they screw with my metobolism. I don't lose well with them. I drop a lot the first week then my body holds on to everything and I don't lose again for about 2 weeks then it's verrrrry slow. Everyone is different but my opinion of low carb diets are they don't work for ME! I think overall if I could choose a way to eat and lose weight and be healthy would be to have everything but in moderation and that is why I wanted the band. I want to be able to eat healthy carbs, fruits, veggies...all the food groups. Some Dr.'s will always push a certain diet but I'd listen to your own body and do what you think you could stick with and do forever. Just like you said, we didn't get the band because the Atkins diet works! It'll work for awhile but a lifetime success of it is very very rare.
  9. RedheadGirl

    It was E Coli....

    I don't think anyone is being uptight. I think there are things you joke about and other things you don't joke about. Cancer kills people and lots of us have either known someone who has died or survived it or have survived it ourself. So when someone throws out a joke about a serious matter, it isn't so funny.
  10. RedheadGirl

    Sobriety and The Lap Band

    CONGRATULATIONS ON 9 YEARS!!!!! I have had addictive problems since I was 15 years old and I'm 34. I used to drink and do drugs as well as smoke. All that went away and I turned to food, hard core! Got myself up to 440 lbs. Anyway, I'm fighting the food addiction now. I just binged tonight and I'm only 2 1/2 weeks post op. I somehow was able to eat lots and lots of food. I hate addiction, hate it! I'm part of a group called CR (celebrate recovery) and though I haven't gone in awhile I'm thinking I need to be heading back since I'm struggling right now. I didn't realize it would hit me so hard trying to remove the food addiction but it is.
  11. I'm almost 3 weeks post-op and I've had three seperate times now where I have ate til I am sooo uncomfortably full.. Tonight I hit the fast food and I bought LOTS of food. Basically like I would of prior to surgery for a binge. I ate a lot, I'm surprised at what and how much I can get down. Of course now I sit here so full and feel horrible and regret it. Why am I doing this to myself? I was a self-pay so I'm shocked that my "old" behaviors are already tempting me and I'm acting on them. I've been able to eat very well since week 2. I'm able to take in over 2 cups of food at one time. I'd type in what I ate tonight but honestly I'd be embarassed at the amount. I'm just wondering if for ONE there is something wrong with me that I'm able to eat LARGE amounts right now?? Is anyone else able to do this before their first fill? Any encouragement or beat downs? Advice? I will say this.... just found out my divorce is final. My car broke down and I need 4,000 bucks for a transmission and my now ex-husband is acting like a player and dating a lot of girls and they all think he is prince charming and it hurts. All this equals wanting to punish or hurt myself with food and instead of doing what I shouldn't do... I'm doing it. Just feel lost, alone and helpless right now.
  12. RedheadGirl

    It was E Coli....

    Just wanted to say that I'm pretty sensitive to the cancer thing as well and I don't think it's funny to make any jokes about cancer even if it's just saying it aided in weight loss. That's just something to not make fun of.... However, I have wondered the same thing and I like the other response on here that she said she just regained control in her life. I think that is a PERFECT answer.
  13. SOOO GLAD I AM NOT ALONE!!!!!!! I had my surgery 6/28 and I've been eating so many foods the past few days that I didn't think I'd be able to eat. I've been having mac and cheese, other pastas, pretzels, crackers..... etc. I'm on the mushy stage and Pasta is listed for me to eat and unfortunately it tastes so good I have it everyday now. I have been eating more than I thought I'd be able to eat. I've been depressed with seeing a 5 lb gain since I've been adding in the other carb mushies. I also get my fill the same day as you. Aug. 9th and I agree it seems toooooo far away. So that is another thing we have in common. Today I've had a half of Protein drink, some pirates booty Snacks and a frozen baked ziti entree'. I wish I had some stronger will power right now to choose healthier options. I think I'm running with the fact that my sheet says I can have pasta so I'm making sure I do. I know I need to add in more protein choices, like cottage cheese and more Protein drinks. I think I've been "so hungry" that I'm almost running with things celebrating that I'm allowed to eat again even though I know I need to be careful. I didn't realize that I'd be this hungry and able to eat this much already. I had my surgery in Mexico so it's not like I have great follow up care to find out all this information. I told myself last night that just because I can eat pasta and pretzels and crackers doesn't mean I should... well what do I do? I wake up and eat carbs. It's hard... really really hard. Just wanted you to know you are NOT alone.
  14. I was banded June 28th and I've been also eating crackers and pretzels. I'm on the mushy stages and I've gained back 5 lbs from adding in potatos, and other carbs. I'm even able to eat Pasta just fine. I feel like I'm blowing it right now because of what I'm able to eat. It's kinda depressing because I thought I wouldn't get my appetite back already or be able to swollow much but I'm eating just like I did before surgery practicually. I'm counting down the days til my fill because at this rate I'll keep gaining back my weight that I lost on my liquid stage.
  15. I've had a really really bad day today. My transmission died, my mom fell while over at my house helping me and the two things I was depending on are both "broke". I had a long incision done during surgery so my mom has been there for me every single minute and keeping my house up and helping me with everything I'm unable to do. I don't have much else help so I really depend on her. Then today was my first day back to work and my cute VW bug broke down and I found out it's the transmission. I have NO money, I just spent it all on my surgery in Mexico. I came home tonight alone, my son is with his dad, and I overate. Nothing has come up but I got down a lot of food that is now making me just unpleasently full but giving me that old comfort feeling of when I would binge or overeat before. My question, when life is crappy and you want to overeat ... how do you overcome it? I've also been only able to take in about 1/3 of my normal dose of my anti-depressents so I'm sure that is why I'm also really feeling down in the dumps. Feeling sad and overwhelmed tonight.

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